🟧🟧TMoir For Now
@tmoir0
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Following
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Media
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Statuses
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Rule 1: don’t be a dick. Rule 2: See rule 1. Rule 3: That is all the rules. No DMs. 🎸 Funk Bass is the universal remedy. Somewhat easily distracted.
Back in SoCal
Joined December 2011
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@thekjohnston
24: And Jesus spake and he did exclaim that he always wanted an AR-15. 25: And then the apostles asked of him “what is this Christmas of which you speak? Aren’t we Jewish?” 26: And then Jesus saith “not anymore, and apparently we are white men”. - GOP Bible, evangelical version
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@cooltxchick
It makes about as much sense as a pork chop milkshake. They have no logic, and they don’t care what happens to society as long as they get to feel that they’re better than someone else. Plus, they can’t make the connection between GOP actions and the direct effect on their life.
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38 years since our first date; 33 years since I do. I think the 33 Anniversary gift is the fix the dishwasher gift.
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Big thanks to all who kept the faith and kept my spirits up during the doomsaying. Suck it
@NateSilver538
, thanks
@HeatherThomasAF
@lifesafeast
@LydiaCornell
@TG22110
@MuellerSheWrote
@MarkHamill
@mariana057
@DocAtCDI
@mmpadellan
@donkoclock
@WillMeyerPA
@AZ_Brittney
@morgfair
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@AMythicWitch
When I was 4 years old, my family stayed at Nixon's house because a relative was a very high ranking administration official. I took the direct phone line to the oval office out the window into the bushes and began saying "Nixon" into it until six SS guys with guns drawn found me
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@DerrickWalkerJ2
I would want extra things like on the freeway in traffic, like just “Don’t worry, you’ll get there, just be patient.” in Morgan Freeman’s voice would immediately lower my blood pressure and I would say “Thank you, Mr. Freeman, you’re right.”
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Do you want to feel old? Think about this, 2016 was 40 years ago...
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@nathaliejacoby1
Yes. 13 districts, 13 judges. Then make it the law that there is always 1 per district.
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@Sidewalk_Steve
@LauraTelerski
@BenTelerski
I have never met a trans person who ever became trans because of the opinions or actions of another person. I don’t believe it is possible.
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@mammylovesc
@WSSmith_wsg
@DebbieLesko
Absolutely. Have a commercial with grandchildren and say I understand people want a gun for many reasons, but I love my grandkids waaaaaay more than any guns, and I have more sense than someone who doesn’t understand that humans are better than that. Elect a sane person to AZ-8.
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The job is not done! The senate is decided in January. Let’s keep up the support for the runoffs in GA!
@SenateDems
@HouseDemsNUSA
@dscc
@TheDemCoalition
@joebiden
@KamalaHarris
@SpeakerPelosi
We need to tweet & retweet Jon Ossoff (
@ossoff
) &
Reverend Raphael Warnock (
@ReverendWarnock
)
They need to be household names, they need to trend, America needs to get to know them now!
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So that app says I’m shadowbanned. I am not sure what that means. If you see this can you put a random emoji as a reply? I bet I get less than 10. Or maybe the app is wrong, because it says almost everyone I saw is also shadowbanned.
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@StacyRost
@nanzhater
So a lady I used to work with would feed the feral cats around the office because she said it was the least she could do. So eventually there were packs of them. But then the raccoons came, and no more cats. But so many raccoons that a whole crew came out and took 84 raccoons.
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@mrsroy44
@TheBloggess
My son used to come home from work and tell me he needed some time to “decompose” before dinner. I said “decompress?” And he said what does that mean?
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My father in law, he is 92 in this picture. Christmas of this year, there were some teens that were talking about they may have just had COVID, they didn't know, they got better and didn't test and no vax. He died 10 days ago. So fuck the fakeass palsy videos. Be ashamed. Now.
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@MarkAselstine
@thekjohnston
He would be kinda scary if you had to get past that guy. He takes all their stuff like a champ and walks away with the bird salute like “you can’t touch this.” I am glad he is on the side of good. Gotta be frustrating for the cheese balls in green.
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@damintoell
Haha yes, New York is really feeling the pinch, because a friend of mine said they were out of the peach mango flavor of coconut water from his favorite brand for two days, they only had the other ten flavors.
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@nathaliejacoby1
The fact that entire TV channels are devoted to creating fear. If we all had gotten the real story from the beginning, we would not be in this place.
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I'm just a Doc.
Yes, a Top Secret Doc.
And I'm in a NSA facility.
Well, I’m supposed to stay here,
Because I must be protected.
If I get out
It threatens al our safety,
But I know noone can just take me
At least I hope and pray that they can’t,
Because I am a Top Secret Document.
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My son is fighting his way through his nursing education and working and dealing with being lonely in a city with no family nearby. Please like this so I can show him folks are pulling for him. Because he’s awesome.
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@PrezLives2022
And the best part is that the next one, he won’t even be able to attend and cannot control any aspect of it. He will just watch on TV like the rest of us. At least until there is too much ketchup on the screen to see it.
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A little known fact: Before the crowbar was invented, most crows drank at home.
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@MJMcKean
I don’t understand that story. It is like “I don’t like Martin Short, except he is funny, and a nice guy, but I don’t like him, except he is really good in all of these things, but I don’t like him, except for these 40 characters, but I don’t like him because…he’s a nice guy?”
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@Sciencenature14
Is it wrong that I want to eat that mushroom to see if it gives me the powers of the black Panther?
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@HeatherThomasAF
You know what would be a reasonable ban on abortion? A complete ban on it being anyone else’s damn business but the woman and her doctor.
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@LisaMarieBoothe
Protip: Anyone who is on the GOP side who is asking "how could this happen?" or "what has this country come to?" about someone attacking an elderly man with a hammer because he is married to Nancy Pelosi. Answers: It happened because you let it. And it came to where you wanted it
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@birbigs
My religion says I get to wake up people in the middle of the night in their bedroom and have them sing “American Pie” to me, and if they miss any verses, they have to make me Spaghetti O’s over a campfire in their yard, while wearing a Catwoman suit.
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@hwinkler4real
Henry Winkler: women adore him, men want to be him, fish are terrified by him…😀
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@Roshan_Rinaldi
Actually, a doctorate is a pretty badass thing to have. But weirdly enough, Einstein skipped straight from having a teaching degree to a doctorate because his first monumental papers that led to the Nobel Prize were good enough to qualify.
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Okay, now the wife and child also tested positive. What in the hell? This is not over, everyone needs to put the mask back on if you took it off. Even the mild symptoms are no fun.
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@TheAuthorGuy
If I had to crawl through 500 yards of sewer pipes in the dark and fight 30 zombie nuns and kick down an oak door with Birkenstocks on to get there to vote for anyone Vs. The current infestation of the White House, I would do it twice just to make sure.
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@RepLucyMcBath
@Jat32244
#25thAmendmentNow
#25thAmendmentNow
#25thAmendmentNow
#25thAmendmentNow
#25thAmendmentNow
#25thAmendmentNow
#25thAmendmentNow
#25thAmendmentNow
#25thAmendmentNow
#25thAmendmentNow
#25thAmendmentNow
#25thAmendmentNow
#25thAmendmentNow
#25thAmendmentNow
#25thAmendmentNow
make trend
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@ClarkADavidson
@schachjohn1
I’m a little older than that, but here is my kid’s Grammy in 1972z
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@TheeAdamRich
That is hilarious. I am all in favor of celebs using their powers for good, but as a society, some of us seem to be having a hard time getting a handle on the meaning of the word “good.” Good means good for all, not just people who pray and look like you.
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@NoblePatriot2
@MikeSington
Oh man. Seriously, you think he’s afraid? What part of going on national tv to tell the truth about who he has always been makes you think DeNiro is afraid of him? By “dangerous” and “scary” he means that if he ever gets power again, he will be even more of a criminal disgrace.
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@MadScientistFF
I always tip 20, because I used to work in restaurants. I also say, abolish the criminally low minimum wage for tipped employees
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@FoolTalkin
@AlexFrancisPH
@JoshFessel
@RyanMarino
As a former painter’s assistant who did that all day, yes. Yes you can.
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@theliamnissan
#RepublicanPartyBeAllLike
Republican Party be all like “we know he’s the Antichrist, but he’s our Antichrist”
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@alexisthenedd
@MaraWilson
Actually, Mrs. Weasley cooks, and Ginny and Hermione make cake, and Queeny makes an amazing Poisson en croute, and if they can follow a potions recipe, they can make soup.
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@kathygriff1n
Hey Kathy, following you again. It would be hilarious if you now changed your name to 1lon M3sk... Or Elon not slim very shady.
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@LakotaMan1
@joncoopertweets
Million times agree. History doesn’t give a crap about whether or not someone is ashamed of it. It goes in the book, it happened.
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@lifesafeast
@nycsouthpaw
The knights Templar were bankers and the purported protectors of the holy land until they lost it, but then another king plotted to destroy them because he did not want to pay back the money he owed them. They must have felt like TFGs lawyers.
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@nathaliejacoby1
The way we will get out of the hole dug by the previous administration is to vote. No matter what roadblocks they have put up, it is vital that we vote for qualified blue candidates. No “protest” votes, no just staying home, because that is actually voting against any recovery.
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@deddleygardens
@bader_diedrich
They were all in love with dying and they were doing it in Texas
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@GeraldoRivera
The thing is, Geraldo, those who are not fans of what Fox has enabling so many awful things and people don’t have to be civil to you. You have helped enable it for too long. That is the crux of freedom of speech: you are free to be a dick, but nobody has to like you because of it
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@GeoffDOCJones
True. Especially on early TV shows. Everyone lipsynced, but usually their own songs. Remember Ashley Simpson on SNL?
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@TheRealNumber6
@AMythicWitch
Yep. A really high ranking administration official. Even ended up serving time.
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@MzSgtPepper
@IAmJohnAles
is funny,
@HeatherThomasAF
is awesome,
@bader_diedrich
is cool,
@LydiaCornell
is super positive,
@MoMcCormick7
is very uplifting,
@GHOSTofSURF
has amazing dogs and cars,
@lifesafeast
is also awesome,
@TonyHQ1985
spread love, and
@PappyParki
is a great guy.
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@nathaliejacoby1
No, but it can certainly reduce stress about many little things, which can prepare the ground for happiness.
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@RonFilipkowski
Protip: Anyone who is on the GOP side who is asking "how could this happen?" or "what has this country come to?" about someone attacking an elderly man with a hammer because he is married to Nancy Pelosi. Answers: It happened because you let it. And it came to where you wanted it
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@IsabellaMDeLuca
Pretty sure he's not. If you look at the things his foundation has done, it is likely Musk is jealous of him.
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@GeorgeTakei
Right? And Josh Brolin played both Thanos and George W. Bush. Perhaps Breitbart doesn’t understand acting, or drama?
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@MARIADAHVANA
@MaraWilson
I gotta say, it would seem odd to me in my early 50s if a woman in her 20s was overly interested in me. I mean sure, I cook a mean grilled cheese, and I can afford Patron, but I am not sure what the draw would be.
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@PamelaApostolo1
No. They are scared of their own shadow for the most part. Scared of anyone who doesn’t look like them, talk like them, and vote like them. They are mostly folks who do not investigate claims about others if it fits their world view, and who live in a gullible bubble.
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@billybrizzle420
@TheAstuteGaloot
My in-laws had to forage for food when their island was invaded during WWII. They would go out to find anything edible as they retreated/were herded across the island with the Japanese soldiers. They later always had a bomb shelter worth of food in the garage until they passed.
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Wow! At the last minute, McConnell seems to be growing some vertebrae! Who’da thunk it?
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@Tazerface16
I am ANTIFA. I come from a family who served, great grandfather in WWI, grandfather in WWII, Korea, Vietnam, Father in Law in Korea after growing up during the battle of Saipan. Myself, former classroom teacher, now IT for healthcare, because inspired to do jobs that help people.
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@LakotaMan1
Yep. Colonization with a side dish of forced conversion and diseases. I mean sure there are nuances, like all history, but the bottom line is that if people are there when you “discover” something, it does not mean you can steal it.
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@jzux
I am in Navy Town, so after like that scene from the Terminator. So, of course I will go outside and get in a position where my skeleton, if it survives, can only lead future cockroach or lizard archaeologists to conclude I was in a tux and tophat, dancing with a cane in my hand.
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@thetonymichaels
@PappyParki
Also Dolly Parton, who just seems to be a really good human. And they have Ted Nugent.
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Hey
@HeatherThomasAF
, good evening my lovely friend. I have just the one question.
Won’t it be completely freakin’ awesome when this is over and we have stomped them and we can take a breather and go back to cute dog pictures??
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I just told her that by the time she grows up, there will be no republicans left.
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@chrissyteigen
I would eat eggs all night, they are hella tasty, Chrissy-I-am. I would eat them in a bed, I would eat them while I read. I would Even go to the store, I would go and get some more.
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@thedaveabbitt
I wanted to ask them why they keep discontinuing my favorites year after year, but instead I marshalled my evidence of this obvious conspiracy, gathered my thoughts together and marched up to them and courageously bought several boxes of the other kinds anyway.
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@ambertamblyn
Wow, that is weird. The joke just sailed over their heads like that. Well, I thought it was funny, if that makes a difference. You could double down and say you are revenge dating Olivia Wilde just to mess with people.
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Twitter contest: find a picture showing delusions worse than this one!
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