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celestial haploglyph Profile
celestial haploglyph

@ostensiblynil

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821
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
haha stupid bugs they can't tell their on a unnatural hyperstimulus that has no nutritional value haha couldn't be me
@gemmabeepo
Gemmabee 🦔
1 year
Tons of aphids on this green metal bollard. They are fools.
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 month
it does kind of fascinate me that when you say you're into math, normal people consider it polite to tell you how much they hate it
@jjjjjjjjojohohn
Big Bazungas in Pashchim Banga 🇮🇳
1 month
A solid 40-50% of my matches make pissy comments about my chosen field of study I’m so fucking tired of it
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 month
@MobyDickSpoiler it's not up to me to decide, the Masses have spoken
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
8 months
ok what the fuck so the placebo effect isn't even real? like, at all? like it literally is just ordinary regression to the mean and there's no evidence of a mind body link in any objective measures what the fuck bro how do we keep fucking this shit up so bad
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 month
@tweetgayther don't tell me what i should understand
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
10 months
i'm getting into an age range where i just don't care about sex as much as i used to feeling a little sad that i wasted all my "caring desperately about sex" years not having any
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
18 days
if you're in a room with at least 23 people, there's a 50% chance that one of them shares your birthday
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
22 days
@ThanksThoth parents that listened to them?
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 month
damn stumbled on some engagement bait muted
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
10 months
@CovfefeAnon there is a dog tumor that got free of its host and is now spreading contagiously among dogs
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
15 days
@AlecStapp apps generally have way more access than you think they do, it's not just the data you put into the app
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
At long last, we have raised an entire generation to emulate characters from the classic sitcom, "Please Don't Act Like These People They Are Awful"
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 month
@brinkwatertoad lmao math is the only academic discipline
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
27 days
petition to have an event that is 85% straight single men not be advertised as a sex camp
@jazz_bard
JAZZ BARD
28 days
Vibecamp 3 planning continuing along swimmingly
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
8 months
@emeraldgecko apparently there is evidence that what is usually called the placebo effect is a result of improperly controlled studies confounding ordinary regression to the mean (people tend to recover from illness even without treatment) with a positive improvement
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
it seems that this tweet is raising a lot of questions that are answered in the tweet
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
8 months
why does a bullet to the head kill instantly? it's not the hole in the skull, some people do that recreationally it's not the hole in the brain, people survive localized brain damage all the time it must be something else entirely 🤔
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
11 months
ok, stupid question for preppers the world's gone to shit and you have to survive near a city where do you get water motherfucker where do you get water doesn't matter, everyone else is there already and now it's got cholera in it
@KateRoseBee
Sitting Like A Shrimp 🦐
11 months
Reiterating that most “bug out bag” lists constructed by preppers imagine you’re going to leave to go like, survive in the wilderness. They’re almost useless. The most likely thing you need to prepare for is evacuating to a friend’s house or hotel, maybe with the power out.
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 month
@PaisleyPosting pretty sure you don't know me
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
@poisonjr bendy polycule = naked yoga group ?
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
8 months
@averykimball they can't keep getting away with it!
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
all of AI research is forgiven for creating this image i love it so much
@mrgreen
Lorenzo Green 〰️
1 year
8. Katy Perry - Teenage Dream: ( @dobrokotov )
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
8 months
the Efficient Market Hypothesis states that the TSA guy who gropes people is turned on by groping people as he will accept a lower salary to indulge his fetish
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 month
@Tropical_Xavier beautiful 🥲
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
11 months
a song is alternating between a bar of C major chord and a bar of F major chord, forever the melody is playing only notes from the chord over each chord where is the tonic note?
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it depends (on what?)
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
you see her across the battlefield, glowing with an unearthly light, anointed by God how do you open?
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 month
@Ruesavatar damn just in awe here your referent is 100% ambiguous
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
11 months
don't you hate it when you get back to your hotel room and go out on the patio and the great unseeing eye is gazing down on you in wordless horror
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
8 months
i hate everybody on this app so much muted
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
the sexuality of the men in Ghostbusters is fascinating 1) pussy hound, probable sex pest, does not get laid 2) repressed but decent, fucks a ghost in a dream 3) beautiful woman throws herself at him, rejects her to focus on work 4) turbo dork, fucks
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
Men, please help me out here: this blew my mind when I heard it, and I have ZERO idea if it’s true. Does every male interaction with another male come with the threat of violence, no matter how small? Like even with friends and family there’s always a slight chance of violence?
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lmao what the fuck
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
2 months
@dklmarxist it was a hit when it came out
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
10 months
apes are hairier than humans, so there must be some infinitely hairy being that we descended from
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 month
@DaCaveOfWonders lmao there's always an smbc i guess
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
8 months
@ItoIian sure, for thoroughness, but the takeaway seems to be that in almost all cases a placebo group gets identical results to a no treatment control group
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
10 months
@HephaistosF sucks to suck i guess
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
this looks like one of the levels of hell where the souls and bodies of the damned are merged together into some kind of writhing suffering edifice
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 month
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
7 days
@AskYatharth this is just the opening scene of Community
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
11 months
i was very confused about geeks / mops / sociopaths at first so let me clarify for anyone else who is confused as well they're not actual mops that would be silly
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
@hi_frye almost there
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
men, what is your trick for not getting hard (eg while wearing loose pants and dancing with a girl)
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
11 months
the hero we need
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 month
@PaisleyPosting beg pardon?
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
@colleagula saw a documentary saying they followed migratory birds there
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
9 months
this is like a Rorschach test, it just looks like whatever words are top of mind for you
@mischiefanimals
animals going goblin mode
9 months
timeline cleanser! rt these cute cats
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
10 months
why are you people bookmarking this there is nothing to come back to
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
after all, why not? why shouldn't i get some Panda Express
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
9 months
holy shit how long have there been community notes on ads how does twitter even make money at this point
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
Wendy's employee: Hi how are you Alpha male: THE RAGE OF MY ANCESTORS SCREAMS FROM MY EYES AND MY PECS ARE FULLY ENGORGED WITH LUST HOW ARE YOU
@DejaRu22
DR22 Ω 🪬🎭
1 year
“How are you doing?” Rather than responding “good” like a cuck Imagine being a fully able bodied man, made in the image of GOD, with testosterone coursing through his veins… and the best you can do is “good” I literally respond “ THRIVING. “ Words matter.
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
11 months
when you were here before couldn't look you in the eye you're just like an angel your tweets make me cry i wish i was special you're so fucking special but i'm a MOP i'm a lemur what the hell am I doing here? i don't belong here i don't belong here
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
23 days
I was walking with my 30 yo grandsons yesterday, when we passed by a beautiful woman, and I asked them what it would take to ask her out. I'll never forget what they said... "We can’t, we don’t know how to do it."
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
"why don't we build cathedrals anymore" bro we landed on the moon
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
some people say i'm too brave, and too much of a hero, but I'd fuck Hulk Hogan with a pussy
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
8 months
@averykimball so true i almost died when they did the emergency warning test 😩
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
10 months
psychedelics are bad for you
@nosilverv
Guy
10 months
What's your TPOT opinion that will ahve you like
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
10 months
god dammit is there anything on this godforsaken fucking planet that i shouldn't be scared of
@TheWarKitchen
𝗥𝗢𝗖𝗞𝗬
10 months
STOP baking in aluminum! I cringe whenever I see someone wrap fish in foil and bake it in an oven. You have no idea what you’re doing. You’re leaching metal into your food! The body is only able to detox SMALL amounts of aluminum. Consume too much and you’re increasing your
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
8 months
@MattiasInSpace @emeraldgecko yeah he's a coy little minx
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
if you spend your life letting people treat you badly and then you finally ask for more what you'll get instead is a lot less this is a problem for someone trying to make a change
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
9 months
lmao as though these assholes at Forbes know whether any of the 70k people at burning man has ebola
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
anyway what's going on on the twitterino
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
8 months
mommy let you use her iPad you were barely two and it did all the things we designed it to do
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
9 months
i would be so humiliated if i was ever disemboweled in front of a crowd like how do you keep your dignity if your guts are spilling out in front of everyone
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
a billion hours of video uploaded to the public internet per second most of it will never be watched except by the algorithm all that effort, just to train an ai to counterfeit human authenticity
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
10 months
as an atheist this is very odd to me as well like if you're a devout Christian and you're giving your children a choice about whether or not to be Christian from the outside, it looks a lot like you don't believe it matters
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
@inerati practicing interviewing pays more per hour than any other work related activity
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
11 months
How To Not Be Anxious 1) eat right 2) exercise 3) do nice things for people 4) don't look in the corner 5) DON'T LOOK IN THE CORNER
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
this documentary clip about pinball is so much hornier than i expected
@psychotronica_
psychotronica
1 year
Omni: The New Frontier 1981 / United States / Andrew Carl Wilk Electronic music pioneer Suzanne Ciani conjures the soundtrack for the classic pinball game Xenon (1980) 🔥sound on🔥
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
@hormeze @Tjdriii tragically, his kids were later caught under a car weighing 1001 pounds
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
men like seeing women jiggle. do women like seeing men jiggle?
am a man - guess yes
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am a woman - declare yes
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
everything looks AI generated to me now
@AdamLaneSmith
Adam Lane Smith | The Attachment Specialist
1 year
5 reasons you are causing yourself heartbreak. Time for some harsh reality. Read this thread at your own risk. ☢️
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
it's weird how much of a pass music gets sitting on hold for a corporate all hands meeting, listening to a song with lyrics that would not fly in the meeting itself hip-hop, naturally
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
9 months
you know, in the old testament, the God of the Israelites is pretty unambiguously a God of War he's even called the God of Hosts (armies) hundreds of times this is not out of context, it's clearly intended
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
this is my religion
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
11 months
mixolydian is the best mode it's not even close
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
8 months
i know that looking at this shit is subliminally damaging me but it's so entertaining there are forms of mental illness on the horizon that have never been imagined this is your brain on AI content
@dante_eats
Dante
8 months
how to frym an egg
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
10 months
i demand leaders that don't look like the reanimated undead
@wideawake_media
Wide Awake Media
10 months
Frequent private jet passenger, John Kerry, admits that destruction of the farming industry is essential to achieving 'Net Zero': "Agriculture contributes about 33% of all the emissions of the world. And we can’t get to net zero—we don’t get this job done—unless agriculture is
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
the FBI trying to define the boundaries of internet culture
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@OversightPR
Oversight Project
1 year
Using terms like “looksmaxxing”, “Chad”, and “Stacy” will get you on an @FBI list for "Involuntary Celibate Violent Extremism."
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
10 months
most of the sample had no sex during work hours. work from home Georg, who should not have been counted, had just an unbelievable amount of sex, like really we were absolutely blown away by his rotating fuck train
@oneunderscore__
Tim Onion
10 months
"We surveyed 100 of the coolest people alive."
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
@the_wilderless math is just a thing you can learn
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
10 months
aha, the lede is buried but like nuggets of gold it shines through both sexes are disgusted by you if you've been fucked by men
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
9 months
would you take a bet of 80% chance a billion dollars, 20% chance a bullet in the forehead?
roll the dice
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play it safe
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
i was in a bad spot emotionally, financially and physically, but then i started doing faceplants
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
11 months
look it's not that hard, anyone can count to ten, this is stupid, it's easy, it's too easy to even bother, you think i'm so stupid i can't count to ten, i can count to twenty thirty no problem, hell i could count to thirty five if i wanted to it's not even worth my time to prove
@VividVoid_
Vivid Void
11 months
The reason bodybuilders and meditators get along so well is because they're the last two groups of people on earth who can count to 10 without getting distracted
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
10 months
this is the most toy ass looking thing ive ever seen did they literally slap together a sign out of construction equipment
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@PopBase
Pop Base
10 months
The X logo has officially been placed on the former Twitter building.
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
7 months
after being off twitter for a couple of weeks regret to report that it is actually better just stopping by to pick up my things
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
8 months
writing code is less like literacy or numeracy, than like a raccoon trying to get through a locked fence
@__drewface
andrew (in CS teacher mode) 🌹
8 months
writing code is a form of literacy, not numeracy. you’re learning to read, understand, and express language that other humans invented to describe and express their ideas It’s much closer to studying and practicing Latin than mathematics.
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
if the deli planned this whole thing, it would be the most brilliant viral marketing stunt ever
@georainbolt
rainbolt
1 year
168 william st, nyc. you can order it by asking for "the rainbolt". do not gatekeep.
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
baby xylophone just dropped
@sheherzog
myspace girl numbers station
1 year
Someone please tell me this is for something other than a baby conference/infant symposium
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
10 months
false. twitter absolutely is a porn site
@McJesse
Jesse McLaren
11 months
These are all porn except one. That one's Twitter.
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
i met @michaelcurzi on a frozen star at the end of time, we were the last two immortal beings not to succumb to ennui and end our own existences and then he was the last
@Gent_Sausage
The Gentleman Sausage
1 year
I met @michaelcurzi at a grocery store in Los Angeles. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything. He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?” I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?”
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
11 months
@Ryan_Gasoline blessed are the procrastinators, for they shall inherit the earth, at some point probably if they get around to it
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
When guys pee do they hold it like a joint or a cigarette? 🧐
💨 joint
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@ostensiblynil
celestial haploglyph
1 year
i woke up covered in gender fluid
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