view from elyse
@viewfromelyse
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that pastry bitch + aspiring host of the NBA’s fashion police
Ann Arbor, MI
Joined July 2012
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@HendoSlice
been saying this for years!!!
the theory that seinfeld is actually an terrible comedian and the whole show is a joke on him is my favorite theory because he’s awful and it makes perfect sense
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@MediumSizeMeech
she always looked that good and i will never forgive anyone who said she was ugly
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wait wait wait does cleveland think their fans can't do simple addition/subtraction?!? i can't stop staring at "the diff" in disbelief
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the theory that seinfeld is actually an terrible comedian and the whole show is a joke on him is my favorite theory because he’s awful and it makes perfect sense
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i cannot stress enough how much i disagree with this take and her lack of brain cells, taste buds, and food knowledge
Just left the grocery store and I have a take: There are too many kinds of apples now. Not saying we should go back to just RED but the number of options is confusing. Around 5 types of apples is enough.
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@Ayah2156
ryan reynolds' constant livelaughlove preening with an undertone of seething for control finally made its way to the surface
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@mshrfseven
@PopCrave
does someone need to slowly explain to you how to mute words in settings
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@ArielEsq305
@gbennylola
focusing her energy on a lowkey fan right in front of the annoying one is the perfect the power move
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@evemmore
@diandrasdiandra
the way they can barely say goodbye to hanna as they walk away "together" but with room for jesus between the two as if they are being subtle....jessa is the WORST by a lot
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@mollylambert
my coworker plays music off his speaker in the kitchen, it’s been a months and i’m still waiting for a woman singer
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@paularambles
"we're breaking all the rules!!!!"
[two paragraphs later]
so here's a list of all our rules and it only took hours of crying over emotionally agonizing conversation, suppressing your feelings, and antidepressants
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@angelblackgoth
@sulsultian
brain is a muscle, you have to expand your knowledge constantly to be smart
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@traveIinsoldier
same title, same song structure and style, this would be like rihanna releasing a song called texas poker and claiming it original
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diffbelief was right there and i chose not to take it lmao
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@LocalOnThe8
@taylorswift13
@icespicee_
yea this was the first tweet based in reality to come up in the replies, these people are fuckin insane
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@InsaneMoviez
i live by a small theater that does this and it's amazing, there was a scorsese series all summer, i randomly got to see devil in a blue dress in a theater, drunkenly saw SHOWGIRLS in a full theater in june amazing
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i like the generation difference in the replies to
@gaywonk
- gen x calls it wipeout, millenials call it death good
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i quit debate and a job with a good title but no future or joy in it this year, i have nooo idea what’s ahead but at least i know what won’t be making me cry in 2019 :)
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chef approved my first ever original plated dessert to go on the menu in one month!!!
pineapple cheesecake (w/toasted coconut flake shortbread crust), rum caramel drizzle, coconut mousse, and caramel rice crispy puffs :)
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i cant believe i started a PASTRY job today that has actual adult benefits and pays the same as my old bullshit no insurance law job, and i didnt have to go to culinary school!! i thought this would take another 6 months at least!
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@cheaperby12film
imo barkley is the only right one
kenny is the shosh (he's "just there," tangentially related by being a forgettable nba player)
shaq is the jessa (he's mean and insulting, lashes out a lot)
ernie is the marnie that keeps everyone together, controls the convo
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@mustachetoilet
same people who think the police are justified shooting anyone agitated or committing a small misdemeanor
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god dammit i quit debate like 3 years ago and here i am judging the finals of blake, mba, and st marks this semester
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@REDSEASHAWTY
delivery drivers get confused that i dont give them my apt # and it should be obvious why!
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an amazing online debate thing just happened - the aff is american taipei, so they are literally in taiwan, and the neg read LAND SPEC as in "not specifying whose land their 1AC takes place on is a voting issue"
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@marcusswims
@Edward_gee313
no. but chef carlos gaytan is the first mexican born chef to receive a michelin star so respect that.
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i got offered a pastry chef job for a new bakery yesterday!!!! today i did a trial shift for a pastry chef job for two restaurants that would be double the pay but i have to wait a week for the offer 😅😅😅
test desserts:
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@equine__dentist
the one time i did salvia i melted through a checkout lane so this checks out (i was sitting in a dorm courtyard)
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"a male feminist walks into a bar
because it was set so fucking low"
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it has been a good 6 or 7 years since
@kevinhirn
and i were on a panel together (finals of minnesota novice states baby)!
i regret making us spaghetti for dinner, would not recommend eating pasta on zoom lol
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i’ve been nervous about these all week and now i feel biscuit relief 🙆🏻♀️
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i love that the 2N from the quarters debate i judged sent me a 2NR redo before the block in the semis was even over
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@Kyla_Lacey
@scib0rg
he was probably overwhelmed by all the different animal smells, i took my cat on a leash to petsmart once 😂 it was fun but stupid
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@epi_ontic
@BrynnTannehill
@maureenjohnson
i may be a cat person but bill murray is definitely a creep
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(i genuinely love apples lmao)
@killajuul
fun apple fact: apples originated in kazakstan, and an apple has a significantly higher gene density than a human
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@Gw3nny__
@tlosophie
@zedonarrival
it's a much better approach than coming up with a premise and forcing it! i get the vibe the bedroom influencers don't get out much or do anything spontaneous ever
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so many people i’m excited to see at the toc!!!
the rest, we can continue to pretend our phones are reallllly interesting when we pass in the hallway
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ok NOW I AM HAPPY! my first original plated dessert :)
🍍Tropical Riffs🍍
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never forget that one year, round the 8th at the NDT, leap was 3-4 and pulled up to debate a first round and won, ending a dbag’s career on death good 😂
good luck this weekend everyone!
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lol exactly a year since i moved from academic writing to the kitchen and i make more money, better benefits, and an actual career path!
i should’ve known after i brought homemade biscuits and jam to my thesis defense 😂
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i can’t wait until i stop having this recurring dream that i’m back in school and skipped math class for an entire semester without anyone saying anything
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@StarbucksCare
@amayalb_
new syrup flavors that taste like eating a candle, this whole thread is pathetic
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what competitive speech activity does this remind me of?
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“i think rbg just won her first oral argument with god” is my favorite tasteless joke so far (pun intended)
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YAY i got hired back to work a few days a week at blue llama!!! the carryout business has been really good and they really did hire me back first 😇
q no see as
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@dogstarsx
@JayElHarris
it's also perfectly reasonable to not want to house the shitbag boyfriend and pay for them to take over her house
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i cant believe they didnt cancel GSU the week after 9/11 but the NDT is in serious doubt because of THE FLU
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online debate sucks but worth having to pause a speech because the 1N's cat is tickling her and she can't stop laughing 😂
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officially furloughed until carryout business picks up, RIP. send a prayer i can go back before i have to start judging debates for cash 🙌🏼
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a work in progress (honey lemon mousse, honey hazelnut caramel candy chiffon cake, hazelnut sable, blueberry coulis) i think i’m going to try making a big green chocolate leaf to make it look like a lemon
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@BBone67
@GlamazonJay
@Destinaetion
you can't lose fat in a specific place like your midsection, but you can grow muscle in your shoulders and legs to highlight your figure
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tonight was the first time ive had to write in chocolate on a plate and i might have spent two hours tempering chocolate and writing “will you marry me?” over and over NO PRESSURE
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do this more!! email authors whose writing you’ve appreciated or cited, send your compliments to the chef or a barista, send a thank you email after a good RFD. people love to voice criticism without taking the time to also pay positive dues.
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