Jamie
@JayElHarris
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Writer in LA, Baby! Prev @CBS . Rep: Merideth Bajana and Delaney Morris at Grandview. Sometimes testing out narrative voices #onhere 🥸
Los Feliz
Joined July 2009
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It’s also extremely weird how the internet treats people existing as “representation” and feels the need to codify existence.
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Just to clarify a man is a himbo if he's hot and simple in a way that makes him NICE. Nice to strangers. Nice to kids. Nice to dogs. Nice to women. Nice to women that he ISN'T attracted to. Niceness is a very key factor. I just want to make sure everyone understands this.
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They were always gay. That’s why they were 45 year old bachelors 💀
when I was a kid park rangers were 45yo bachelors who liked being outside, now it’s a never ending they/them sleepaway camp
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That the Kennedy’s were hot
If you grew up in the United States, what's one thing that you learned in history class that you later learned was just propaganda?
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I know we've just totally lost the war on this, but I still think playing music, a video or having a conversation on speaker phone for more than like a hot second, in an enclosed public space is a huge sign of anti-social tendencies.
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One of the worst parts of childhood is when every behavior you exhibit is relegated to “having an attitude” or “being moody” while you watch adults act out however the fuck they want. Incredibly dehumanizing.
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I always forget my friend was Jay Z’s personal assistant for about 9 months and said he was actually really easy to work for and just wanted them to listen to his advice at all hours of the day 💀
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My grandmother who was born in 1930 wants you all to know that there is no Retvrn to Tradition. They constantly had kids out of wedlock, they just hid them. She said I should tweet that.
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Boomer and Gen X marketing execs have a very hard time wrapping their heads around the fact that very few 35 year olds have 12 year olds these days lol
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HBO Max felt like it was poised to dominate the streaming market in the not too distant future I’m so confused
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Not even trying to be shady, but this can only be surprising new information to you if you’ve never been around two parent heterosexual homes
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I hope that some of you open your minds and experience the pure horny joy of dating someone hot and watching them be hot in public.
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I hope that bell hooks got to experience the love she wrote about.
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Keith Lee abandoning his Bay tour because California’s housing crisis is so depressing might be the exact spotlight we need for major change because that man had the Atlanta city council meeting and that was just over poor service
Keith Lee decides to end his Bay Area stop on his “Keith Lee and Family Food Tour” prematurely:
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When someone speaks with this cadence, you know they aren’t saying a damn thing.
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We need feminism to come back into the public discourse BIGLY. And not this any choice a woman makes is feminist, I make him pay for my nails, bullshit. REAL feminism with intellectual heft and material, political and existential vision.
I love how not liking when young women blindly buy into an unrealistic image of domestic bliss, sold by a 22 year old Mormon influencer who is about to have her fourth kid, it is actually just being miserable and bitter instead of being wary and observant. We never getting free.
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A lot of heterosexual couples don’t really have a foundational friendship which is a necessary part of a functioning romantic relationship (no sense in arguing with me here. I’m right). Also queer people often have terrible boundaries. Again. Don’t @ me lol
i know so many straight people who NEVER talk to their exes and sooooo many queer people who are like “this is my ex-girlfriend and we share custody of our dog Skippy and she’s the godmother of my children oh and also we own a bar together”
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Not even trying to be funny when I say if we all spent less time on our phones scrolling mindlessly, including me, we’d realize how much time we have to do all of these things.
How the fuck are we meant to work 35-40 hours a week (minimum), maintain social relationships, stay fit and active, eat good food, enrich our lives with hobbies, do extra work/studies for personal development, in some cases care for family, all while the world crumbles around us?
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My mother made a quilt for each of us, me and my brother, made out of my late father’s tie collection 🥹
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When 17 year olds experience their 1st romantic heart break, it’s emotionally painful, but you likely have the summer off from school. When 30 year olds break up, it’s emotionally painful, maybe you have to find a new apartment & while ur looking, u have to go to work on Monday💀
A first heartbreak at 30 will not dismantle your life like it did at 17
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Someone understood the assignment.
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Genuinely find it sad that you can grow up into a woman and not see through new eyes the fact that your father was twenty four dating a 9th grader.
Before her death earlier this year, Lisa Marie Presley expressed shock and horror over the depiction of her father Elvis Presley in the script for Sofia Coppola’s new film “Priscilla”:
“My father only comes across as a predator and manipulative. As his daughter, I don’t read…
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Some one else pointed this out, but is part of this a generational thing where people don’t slow dance anymore and haven’t since like 2002, so any kind of public sensuality and people under the age of 30 act like they just saw two people initiating sex 💀💀💀
am i the only woman understanding why her man is mad 😭 like ???
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My home owning mid Western boyfriend when he finally saw my LA studio apartment
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Apparently it’s like 1.5% of the population and a lot of people don’t really find out until they try to have kids. Intersex truly might be the one thing “no one talks about”.
I knew intersex people exist and its a thing but I never actually saw someone with it talking about it, its so interesting omg
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It’s actually a masterpiece but okay
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We’re adding parents who send you money for food now as “generational wealth” 😒
"Generational Wealth" isn't just inheriting a pile of money, it's also things like whose parents are able to help you pay your first deposit on a rental, whose parents can help you out when your car stops running, whose parents can just send you food when you're low
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Just lifted a woman’s bag overhead and put it up for her on Amtrak. She said “whoa”.
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Congress blamed him for Columbine.
What DaBaby said was wrong…but now mfs doing wayyyyy too much. I ain’t never seen Eminem get repercussions and he been blatantly homophobic since the early 2000s.
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The dog in THE ZONE OF INTEREST (2023) gave a better performance than the dog in ANATOMY OF A FALL (2023), but it was a quieter performance and we know how that goes
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Like it should be a symptom of narcissistic personality disorder in the DSM.
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I know Jonathan Majors and his team are crazy because that’s a charge you plead out, release a pr apology, lay low for a year and reemerge in a quiet, but decent indie movie. Do a few short interviews where you talk about how you went to anger management etc.
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A millennial trying to seduce a zoomer…the discourse is gonna break this app
Jennifer Lawrence stars in the first trailer for ‘NO HARD FEELINGS’.
The film releases on June 16 in theaters.
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Americans in places like Kansas after DUNE PART TWO (2024) does over a billy at the box office
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You'll never be able to convince me that gender reveal parties, a thing that literally did not exist until like five years ago, aren't reactionary.
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sorry but they're victims
idk i’ve dated two poly dudes who had pregnant wives at home and the wives were cool and didn’t care/didn’t feel like dating/wanted their partner to keep dating
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I’m sorry but “who ruined NYC” discourse that lays the problem at the feet of tote bag mother fuckers with a dollar and a dream as though people haven’t moved to the city for the vibes since the beginning of its existence makes me feel like I’m losing my mind
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Nathan Fielder's real talent is finding people who deserve to be put through his mind games because every time I start to feel uncomfortable with the conceit, two seconds later I'm like nah you need to learn this lesson lol
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If you told me the dude watching TikTok’s on the bus for 20 minutes at max on speakerphone struggled to make and maintain relationships, I would not be surprised. That’s all I’m saying.
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Like I find it a bigger sign of societal decay than lots of low level crimes.
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Being 35 and shopping on SHEIN is insane.
The average SHEIN shopper isn’t a broke teen girl
It’s a 35-year-old woman who “cares about sustainability” & spends $1200 per year on clothes
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The fact that Drake doesn't take himself too seriously is half the appeal. Those that get it, get it.
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Orson Welles is right though. Often once you get to know a *socially awkward* person, you just realize they’re an arrogant prick. But I know damn well this app isn’t ready for THAT conversation.
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I genuinely don’t understand takes like this. A small, less than 15m movie led by three actors without extensive Hollywood credits, a director’s first film and wasn’t some runaway hit or distributed by a studio getting nominated for Best Picture is incredible?
So according to the Oscars, Past Lives directed itself and there were no actors in it. Got it.
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Thinking that a billionaire needs to worry about her age in regards to fertility is genuinely funny.
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Don’t care about the *law*, genuinely think doctors/hospitals like this should be under review by the medical board
In Wisconsin, a woman bled for more than 10 days from an incomplete miscarriage after emergency room staff would not remove the fetal tissue out of fear that doing so might run afoul of state abortion restrictions.
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Baby u a victim
I've said b4 that a lot of White Americans aren't poor. They think they are poor.
200-300 AFTER BILLS AND GROCERIES????
The days I just dreamed of that
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Not advocating for exorbitant wealth but it is funny how much less A list actors make now than they used to in the 90s lol
Highest reported film paydays for actresses in 2022:
1. Jennifer Lawrence – $25M
2. Zendaya – $13-15M
3. Margot Robbie – $12.5M
4. Millie Bobby Brown – $10M
5. Emily Blunt – $4M
6. Jamie Lee Curtis – $3.5M
7. Anya Taylor-Joy – $1.8M
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Just got out of DUNE PART TWO (2024) and I have a lot to say, starting with…..Islam is the one true faith.
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Like people are being like “what?! This doesn’t happen!” in the mentions and like how would you know? You didn’t have a dad at home and no one you knew did either 💀
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Again, our old rich people used to build public parks and support obscure modern dance studios for funsies and now our new ones won't even just make a lil tv for fun without it having to turn a profit. I HATE IT HERE.
Prime Video is launching ads on January 29
A new ad-free option costs an additional $2.99 per month
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Will you guys please stop comparing this to Chadwick Boseman? Like it’s actually offensive to everyone’s intelligence. The mcu does not have a history of abusing its stars through shady pr practices or releasing photos of body doubles.
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There needs to be a full scale investigation into this film's budget and what it went to. Someone walked away with millions of dollars if they actors had to ask for food and trailers.
Danielle Brookes talking about how they didn't have their own dressing rooms or food until Oprah called Taraji
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One thing Zoomers will never know is how buying a new family tv used to be a whole event. Your parents arguing over the budget. Your father manipulating you against your mother for those extra few inches. Think I read somewhere once a new tv used to cause 2% of all divorces.
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I feel like y’all are losing the plot here a bit, if this really happened, why are cops regularly pulling guns and doing raids for non violent offenses? Have we forgotten how insane this is?
Felicity Huffman speaks out about the college admissions scandal and serving 11 days in prison.
“They woke my daughters up at gunpoint. Again, nothing new to the Black and brown community. Then they put my hands behind my back and handcuffed me.”
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Restarting student loan payments right before the mid-terms is the behavior of an unserious politician. Don't @ me.
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The safely socializing is not possible discourse is so bizarre to me because it's like we completely forgot last summer when thousands of people took to the streets, masked to various degrees, and every data scientist said there was no increase in cases due to the protests
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Again. You are not the first person to feel burnt out after working 40 hours a week. The difference is that people used to decompress in the company of friends and family instead of scrolling.
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Okay I didn’t think the poem was good but that’s obviously not what it’s going for at all. Come on now 💀
Having to demonstrate solidarity with the Palestinian cause is just as much of a chore as doing the fucking laundry? Like the selfishness is astounding
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? Kids used to hang out with their parents on their parents’ terms, not the other way around.
No one liked the good the bad and the ugly when they were a little kid. Be fucking serious.
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The Gilded Age billionaires used to fund new hospitals, open theaters, build public parks, etc. Now Apple won’t even fund a lil streaming service. RETURN TO TRADITION.
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No. Unless you have some kind of injury or disorder, you need to figure out what’s wrong with your back.
Part of being an adult is just accepting that this is the way your back feels now.
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I haven’t even watched this yet but that’s generally how satire works…centering what is being satirized
i do think white people love the white lotus because it satirizes privilege/class/servitude while still centering white people
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Y’all are being psyop’ed into normalizing the rent being too damn high by saying it’s broken Western individualism for a young adult to have their own place and y’all don’t even see it
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The last great limited series. Been chasing this high ever since.
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I really don’t know what to make of a country where people are terrified to interact with each other. So sexless that even the potential of seeing sex through 1 of our fantasy mediums is likened to depravity. So scared of the poor that extermination becomes normalized.
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When I was in 6th grade, my best friend was Korean and her family took me to a Korean bathhouse and seeing dozens and dozens of naked women who weren’t my mom actually solved a lot of my body insecurities, or at least as much as you can solve them for a middle schooler.
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It’s perfectly reasonable to not want your nineteen year old daughter to be a mother.
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This right here
Kristen Stewart is over Robert Pattinson questions.
“Rob and I can’t keep talking about that sh*t. It’s f*cking weird. It’s like if someone kept asking — for literally decades — ‘But senior year in high school?’ Like, ‘F*cking A, man! I don’t know!’
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And for the millionth time, the divorce rate is not as high as it’s ever been. It peaked at some point in the early 80s and has pretty consistently gone down ever since.
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Honestly, this is a gift. I’m going to use this every five minutes.
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But I do think it’s anti-social as in antagonistic to society, which I guess the prefix is really ant-, but this is Twitter and not an English class.
@JayElHarris
Idk why we need to say “anti-social tendencies” when we can just say it’s f*cking rude.
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I think what particularly makes me feel crazy when I see this rhetoric on TikTok is when they say “think back to our parents generation” and I do and those women worked. Again, what is this imagined past of the 90s and 00s…?????
think a lot of people in the QRTs are missing the point, this video has 500,000 views on tiktok currently with a bunch of women agreeing with him, we should all be very worried about this rhetoric popping up while also being critical of capitalist exploitation
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It’s genuinely disturbing the ease at which this app calls her a p3do
So now that we know Lena Dunham is directing the new polly pocket movie, I’d like to remind everyone that she is exceedingly racist, misogynistic, & sexually abused her younger sister. She’s kept a low profile for a while now but the internet always remembers
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Calling your average house pet a slave is honestly so funny. It’s the kind of theoretical statement that only a human who suffers from consciousness could think up. If a dog could talk, he’d be telling his cousin the wolf how cool it is that he gets to sleep on a tempur pedic bed
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This is the kind of hot take that would go viral on Twitter but when you hear it out of someone’s mouth irl you’re like……?????
Billy Porter criticizes Vogue for featuring Harry Styles in a dress on their cover.
“I created the conversation [about non-binary fashion] and yet Vogue still put Harry Styles, a straight white man, in a dress on their cover for the first time.”
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All I know is that everything about their energy says they get DOWN
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Oh this is diabolical
The "Third Place" is dying. You know, the place besides your home and work where you can hang out with your friends and family. This is a Starbucks near me that just renovated recently. The big change: No more seats! Take your coffee and get out.
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I'm not a long covid denier nor do I believe avoiding COVID infection is some kind of "crazy" position, but some of the COVID conscious accounts
#onhere
really don't seem mentally well
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What you’re identifying is that the writers have style and that’s something that we used to appreciate lol
An annoying thing about Succession is that everyone is much too eloquent and verbally clever. they try to cover it up by having them stutter and uh and so on, but it's the dialogue equivalent of having everyone in a sitcom be supermodel hot. They're all much too easy on the ears.
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And it’s wild how many millennial film critics have made their entire career doing this
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Oh I know you’re a mad man if you’d rather Hillary be president right now navigating the current Israel-Palestine conflict. That woman has never deescalated a war in her entire life 💀
“Not voting” prevented this Middle Eastern policy expert from being president for the last 7 years.
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I can't even believe this needs to be said, but you need to teach your kid how to read. No one expects you to teach math or basic American history, but yes, reading is partially your responsibility. You don't need to be a professional. You need to order hooked on phonics.
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You don't have to partake..we're all adults with autonomy...but a good party has people doing coke at it...sorry if this offends!
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I’m sure this show isn’t a masterpiece or anything, but you all do realize it’s for children, right? 😐 You cringe because your subconscious is speaking to you, begging for you to grow up and watch something made for adults. Maybe cinema from New Hollywood or a 90s indie.
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I saved this to my phone during the pandemic. Crying 😭 I hate this place so much.
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This man opened fire in the middle of a crowded shopping mall because the YouTuber put his phone in the shooter’s face…why is everyone replying “good that he got off”? Has everyone lost their damn minds?!
A jury on found a man not guilty in the shooting of a YouTube prankster who followed him around a mall food court
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