Bovril-Gesellschaft
@BovrilG
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My Tweets do not aim at changing people or making them do something. They are written for warm-blooded heterosexuals in railway trains, aeroplanes and beds.
Heavenly Desserts, Batley
Joined November 2022
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#今月描いた絵を晒そう
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Aziz
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Eminem
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기자회견
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FOTFOT TOMMY BOY
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Pinned Tweet
By popular demand (two people asked me for it), I present How To Make 1950s Advertising Art In Bing Create Like Wot I Do: the Thread
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Worth noting that Turing only suffered legal consequences because he decided to frame a teenage rent boy for burglary instead of paying him for services rendered.
Dya know something that boils the blood of the gammon? Reminding them that Britain's greatest war hero was a gay man. 🤙🏳️🌈
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Yamnaya Steppe Warrior poses with captured Dravidian catamite (1750 BC, colourised)
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"You there, boy, what day is it?"
"Why, it's Global Day of Jihad, sir!"
"Alhamdulillah, brother!"
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"I'm going to vote for the most horrible right-wing party I can find."
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Friendly reminder that if you oppose mass deportations:
- you are out of step with the civilised world, in particular our European neighbours
- you are contributing to making our country a laughing stock
- you are mentally ill
- you are on the wrong side of History
Sweden is planning to deport any migrant who earns under £2,000 per month - estimated at around 30% of immigrants - with plans to increase it to £2,700 per month, citing that recent immigration has caused a totally parallel society:
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@ChayaRaichik10
According to Philostratus, Titus refused to accept a triumphal wreath for putting down the Great Jewish Revolt on the grounds that there was no glory in destroying a people who had so manifestly been forsaken by their own god.
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"Once you've been to Cambodia, you'll never stop wanting to b-ACK!"
Kissinger is trending, so it’s time to tweet this immortal quote on Henry Kissinger, written by Anthony Bourdain in 2001.
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@KILLTOPARTY
The Myspace equivalent of those Japanese soldiers who kept fighting in the Pacific until the 1970s.
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The Guardian's much more readable now that it's shifted from naming the people who write for them towards just providing a vague description of them.
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@whstancil
I like to imagine every waiter Stancil ran into from Puglia to Piedmont looking him over briefly, sighing, and bringing him the brightly-coloured laminated menu with child-sized portions of Il Hamburger and I Chicken Nuggets on.
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In 1845, Engels coined the phrase "social murder" to refer to the phenomenon whereby capitalism brought about the unnatural and early deaths of the proletariat. On the first National Grooming Gang Day of Remembrance, it might be time to introduce the concept of the social groomer
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@kunley_drukpa
David Attenborough making ninety minute speeches in pub back rooms to audiences of a dozen people about CLEARING THEM OUT, becoming a meme a decade after his death after they all get uploaded to YouTube and Zoomer start making vaporwave edits
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"Full assaults on anti-Stancil positions were preceded, in the early hours of 9 December, by fanatical Stanciljugend assault detachments, some as young as twelve, and all unarmed save for a copy of Stancil's pamphlet on smart urbanism, clearing minefields by walking through them"
2028: Will Stancil sits impassively in the dock at The Hague as one of the handful of survivors of Minneapolis’ previously flourishing Somali community tearfully describes watching her extended family being turned into hotdish for his amusement.
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Woah! An elderly man with an unhealthy interest in teenage boys needs me? Okay, I'll do it. I'm going to bat for you, Elderly Man with an Unhealthy Interest in Teenage Boys! I got your back, Doddering Pederast!"
Huw Edwards buying legal porn isn't a crime, and it's not a story.
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@ursine_meeting
I can't wait for ten million young Indian men who base their entire understanding of Western women on grainy thirty-second porn clips they've watched on their cousin's smartphone to get here.
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Just as the Esquimaux have dozens of words for "snow", the American press has dozens of words for [redacted].
"Balaclava-clad creeps," you say? I wonder what that could mean...
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@_adamcherry_
As a utilitarian, I would like to note that my great and lasting pleasure at being able to get a kebab at 3am from a man who calls me “bossman” greatly outweighs that MP’s slight discomfort at being confronted by a horde of people whose importation she almost certainly supported.
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“I support banning that Shamima Begum girl from ever being allowed into Britain”
“That’s incredibly harsh - she was only fifteen when she was groomed into joining ISIS, after all…”
“She joined ISIS?”
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@mypillowgorl
“Two spiritedness” was basically invented by the decidedly non-Indian communist and pederast Harry Hay.
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@moonlit_misfit
Race communists when the third world hordes who do their dirty work take a brief break from murdering people from groups the race communists don’t like to engage in a bit of the old in-out
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It’s astonishing how much personal politics correlates with physiognomy. Put a sepia filter on this picture and photoshop an early Soviet uniform on Mr Campbell and he could plausibly be a low-level Chekhist who was purged for excessive psychopathy on the foundation of the GPU.
Leicester is the one least white places in the UK so I went to ask them about immigration
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@RossMcCaff
Normal people care about things like this. If you find it so uncomfortable, you might want to consider logging off and touching grass.
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@LPTexas
@LPTravisTX
@GregAbbott_TX
An excellent reminder of why everyone grows out of libertarianism after they get laid for the first time
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@theJeremyVine
Jeremy Vine preparing to slam his bike into the back of a bus for Internet Points (2023, colourised)
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@ClarkeMicah
Afternoon Peter! Just out of interest, in what order would you rank the following annoyances:
1) Daylight Savings Time
2) the Beeching Cuts
3) the mass rape of English girls by Mirpuri grooming gangs
4) the ubiquity of skimmed milk in cafes?
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It's an understated facet of WWII that the Pacific Theatre was essentially a race war between the Japanese and people ultimately from here.
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Wikileaks’ willingness to assist the British security services in destroying the BNP is the major reason that Assange is getting handed over to the Americans when I seize power.
If you’re thinking of posting “why the Germans do it better,” we went there already.
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2028: Will Stancil sits impassively in the dock at The Hague as one of the handful of survivors of Minneapolis’ previously flourishing Somali community tearfully describes watching her extended family being turned into hotdish for his amusement.
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You will never be a real cosmopolitan. You have no facility for foreign languages, you have no real interest in Hochkultur, you have no sophisticated Parisian friends. You are a not very bright provincial woman twisted by James O'Brien on LBC into a mockery of Erasmus's creation.
@PippaCrerar
@bbc5live
I personally have absolutely no sympathy for the attention seeking Racist .
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So, I’ve been eating this for breakfast every morning in Finland for about nine days and I’ve lost 3 pounds.
The food in England is just poison.
So, I’ve been eating this for breakfast every morning in Italy for about nine days and I’ve lost 3 pounds.
The food in America is just poison.
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@Sargon_of_Akkad
@sweden2023eu
The Isle of Patmos, where they were created by a black magician called Yakub of the Tribe of Shabazz and taught tricknology to keep the Asiatic Blackman down.
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I would rather have a guillotine in Whitehall than listen to yet another midwit historian talk about how Napoleon was akshually inferior to his contemporary Jean-Claude Umbongo who ruled Haiti as an enlightened despotism for two weeks before being eaten by his successor.
HE CAME FROM A RELATIVELY PRIVILEGED BACKGROUND.
HE CONQUERED AROUND 2% OF THE EARTH'S LAND MASS.
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Here’s what a creatively bankrupt and utterly uninspired attempt at rebooting a mediocre twenty year old film would look like if it were black or Chinese.
‘MR. & MRS. SMITH’ starring Donald Glover and Maya Erskine debuts on Prime Video on February 2.
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The possibility that the suspect's refugee status will be used by the far right is unquestionably the worst thing about a half dozen children being stabbed.
"It seems to me the French police, not the anti terror unit have taken charge which tells me it's not a terrorism case but my fear is regardless of the outcome the fact that the suspect is a refugee will be used by the far right."
@FawazGerges
on the attack in France.
📺Sky 501
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Note to followers. DO NOT accept flirty DMs from "Ms Drukpa". "She" gets you to send nudes to "her" and then a large Lebanese man gets in touch and threatens to leak them unless you transfer funds to various Phalangist militias. Cost me a fortune last year.
Dear followers, I am announcing a public dox of
@kunley_drukpa
The account is run by a Lebanese Maronite called Marie. Due to the deteriorating economic situation she is willing to leave at a moments notice to a high trust and litter free society. Please DM her with offers.
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MATE MATE MATE
YOU CAN'T GO SAYING MEN AND WOMEN HAVE WILDLY DIFFERENT PHYSICAL CAPACITIES YEAH
WE'RE TRYING TO WAGE A WAR AGAINST THE VERY FABRIC OF REALITY ITSELF HERE MATE
YOU NEED TO STEP BACK YEAH
Some of the replies to this post are really disappointing.
These women have stepped up and shown an interest in one of the most challenging roles in policing. They deserve our respect, not insults and abuse.
Our women firearms officers are assessed to the same standard as
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Police have released an artistic reconstruction of the suspect.
@AkanKwaku
My 73 yr old French grandmother in England, who still works for the NHS, whose car was vandalised by local racists, causing her to cycle the 13 miles to work for weeks, regularly returns home to find notes like this recent one, on her door! Police refused to help.
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It'd be the kindest thing to do to the publication at this point, really.
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The British wine industry now regularly produces markedly superior to their French and Italian equivalents. The British cheese industry is unrecognisable from twenty years ago. You'd know that if you weren't a thick doddering Boomer raised on Fray Bentos.
@gavinantonyrice
And its got nothing to do with wages. UK does not have a proper food culture. Do you want someone from Spain/Italy/France serving you who grew up in a family restaurant serving amazing food or a British kid who grew up thinking that Fish and Chips was the heights of cuisine?
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I will say this for J K Rowling: she was the first person to realise that all eleven year olds can be sorted into “jock”, “nerd”, “white supremacist” and “other”
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@Baldaccios
Hilarious that the Wikipedia page for Benford's Law was heavily edited in late November 2020.
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@CountBinface
@niall_gooch
@spectator
Afternoon Mr Harvey. Do you reckon you'd be standing for Parliament wearing a bin on your head or spending a Monday frantically refreshing Twitter for any mention of your name if your career as a comedian had actually panned out the way you'd hoped?
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@peterjukes
@double_drax
I take it a working knowledge of Virgil isn’t required for employment at the “Byline Times”, whatever that is.
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Vaughan Gething is set to be next first minister of Wales and the first black man to lead the country
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I want to say sorry to my Aboriginal followers that BP formulated an Australia-specific type of petrol in 2005 that you can’t get high from inhaling.
Today is National Sorry Day. I want to say sorry for the Stolen Generations. Sorry for the record numbers of First Nations children in out of home care today. We need to understand this is not the past, the injustices and trauma continue. We must Listen. Learn. Act
#SorryDay
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We need something like China's Cultural Revolution but aimed at early 2010s Tweeness rather than the last vestiges of Confucianism.
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"I do have my limits, darling! You've been on that website where all of you pretend to be homosexual racist bodybuilders since seven, and it's three in the morning. The West won't get any MORE fallen if you come to bed now..."
"I haven't given a moment's thought to why a chimp in a state of nature wouldn't do THAT in my life! Honestly, darling, sometimes I wonder if this "Bronze Age Pervert" fellow is altogether good for you..."
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Not quite sure how this happened, but Trump is one pair of mutton-chops away from looking exactly like an elderly (but still vigorous), prosperous Yorkshire farmer. Solid physiognomy.
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If there's one thing Yorkshire's become known for over the last fifteen years, it's the harassment of Pakistani girls by English men. Well done for calling it out.
We’re asking men and boys across West Yorkshire to help us put an end to everyday harassment and inappropriate behaviour towards women and girls.
Will you play your part?
Tell your friends:
❌It’s not banter.
❌It’s not harmless.
❌It’s not okay.
So,
#JustDont
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@GrandmasterNabz
“As far back as Roman times there were millions of non white people living here”
Exhibit A in a long list of evidence of why the negatives of generations of cousin marriages far outweigh your ability to keep property within your family.
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Quite impressive how Gavin Barwell simultaneously resembles a possessed ventriloquist's dummy in a low-budget slasher movie and the child who becomes said dummy's first victim.
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It's worth noting that British society is even more absurdly class-bound than it was in the nineteenth century. The only change is that the previous, virtually untouchable ruling class has been replaced by a new one without a shred of personal responsibility or noblesse oblige.
Karen Millward was Head of Risk & Patient Safety at Chester while babies were being killed.
Ignored warnings.
Now Head of Governance at Broadgreen Hospital Liverpool.
Incompetence in the NHS just gets moved about like priests within the church.
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@afraidofwasps
The Oracle of Delphi telling Croesus that no man can be considered truly brilliant until he has died in a roofing accident
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@FraserNelson
Fraser Nelson when he discovers he has to pay his foreign employees a reasonable wage
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The People’s Front of Judea
Last day of shooting in Rome for Daily Wire with some great people.
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The sheer amateurishness of Israel's propaganda war in the last month really has underscored that it's basically a bog-standard Levantine state kept at just about first-world level by eyewatering levels of American largesse.
Arabic copy of Hitler's Mein Kampf is found on body of Hamas terrorist in a child's bedroom in Gaza, Israeli president says
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@LocalStigmatic
@edcmpbl
Excellent parody of a vacuous Boomerlib. Not a single sentence which isn’t a truism, a cliche or obviously false. Well done!
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I’m going to say something and I want you all to promise not to get angry with me.
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@liam_thelegend_
@hopenothate
"Or is the Windrush generation just a joke to you?"
Yes, and I'm tired of pretending they're not.
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@Dr_BellaR
Yes, foreign medical professionals ARE disproportionately over-represented in the mental health sector.
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@holland_tom
@SweeneysTweets
"I may be facilitating the sexual abuse of teenage girls on an industrial scale, but at least I'm not RUDE!"
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Flannery O’Connor mentioned in a private letter that a civil rights group had protested in her hometown for the desegregation of the public library, only to discover that it had already been integrated for eighteen months but no Gentleman of Colour had visited it yet.
Nearly half of American children live in a book desert—neighborhoods that lack public libraries and stores that sell books, or in homes where books are an unaffordable or unfamiliar luxury.
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At the end of the day, if you pay MPs a salary they could get as the manager of a mid-sized supermarket branch, and make it clear to them that their purpose is to be some sort of social worker rather than governing, this is the sort of person you end up with in the Commons.
The former sports minister Tracey Crouch MP has submitted a motion in parliament calling on Nike to put the England goalkeeper Mary Earps’ replica shirt on sale
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@PoliticoForYou
Double standards. You’d never say that Humza Yousaf was waiting for guidance from Allah or Ed Miliband was waiting for guidance from Satan.
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Every single ad on Neanderthal TV:
Homo Sapiens boy together again with his Neanderthal girl on the first warm day of Spring
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She is a hard 7. You used to find an Eva Vlardingsomething in every small-scale political grifting operation aimed at extracting money from Boomers in 1995.
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Prior to October 7th, "How would you feel if those immigrants were hostile to your particular group rather than simply to White English people?" was Bella Wallersteiner's personal Breakfast Question. She failed it utterly.
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"We are now officially the most racist and cruel country in the world."
Today is the most shameful day in British history. We are now officially the most racist and cruel country in the world.
Even St George himself wants himself off that flag. Shameful. I'd be EMBARRASSED flying that today.
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As I walked out one winter day
I met a bear along the way
His pelt was brown, his mien was gay
His clothing made of the cold red clay
His clothing made of the cold red clay
Why are people obsessed with making Paddington Bear the grim reaper
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@IAPolls2022
The 9% of respondents who simultaneously believe that Trump will be a dictator and plan to vote for him in November (artist's reconstruction):
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“Open borders, but for 130+IQ Anglos and women 130+IQ Anglos want to have sex with.”
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@snigskitchen
@Otto_English
Sorry Britain was objectively a much nicer place before people like you started shitting it up. Facts don’t care about your feelings!
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The positive from all this is that, to the great extent that Sunak is representative of the British State, these people are psychologically incapable of pivoting even slightly in response to events. Like Ceausescu on the balcony, they have long since forgotten how to think.
🚨 BREAKING: The full speech by Rishi Sunak
- Galloway by-election win "beyond alarming"
- Democracy now a "target"
- Streets have been "hijacked" by hostile groups
- Islamists and far right are "equally desperate" - can't "accept democracy"
- New robust framework to combat
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Luv me Empire
Luv me mercenary work for the Qing Dynasty
Luv me increasingly esoteric religious views
Ate the purported Twelfth Imam (not racis jus dont like im)
Simple
As
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We have much to learn from indigenous Chinese ways of knowing
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Given that Horrible Histories appears to be five minutes away at any moment from launching into a musical number about Yakub creating white people on the Isle of Patmos, I'm not entirely sure the Chinese are solely responsible for "anti-Western propaganda" reaching children.
There are huge geopolitical risks too. We spend billions of pounds a year on defence and yet – through the Chinese owned TikTok - we allow our political enemies direct access to our children in their bedrooms with hyper sexualised and anti-Western propaganda. 9/16
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