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Maggie Westrum Profile
Maggie Westrum

@maggiewestrum

Followers
654
Following
497
Media
2,633
Statuses
20,029

gentle amusement cloaked in mystery

Joined July 2020
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 months
maggie’s back in town
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
improve a city by adding a letter: Motorhead, Minnesota
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
3 years
to be fair, i also do not have plans to work with james franco in the future
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
can someone explain philosophy to me?
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
whatever happened to the Bermuda Triangle? is it still a thing or did they finally fix it?
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
@DylanTop5 Vin Diesel?
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
if you ask it to combine garrison keillor and rainn wilson, ai gives you the editorial staff of The National Review
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
men, what is keeping you from looking like this?
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
9 months
isn’t this how jack black pretty much always looks?
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
@mattyglesias trying to imagine a woke feudalism, where’s Monty Python when you need them?
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
9 months
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 month
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
3 years
@davidfrum the Republicans have won the popular vote only once in the last 28 years. they are out of touch with real Americans.
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
3 years
going to be a Kantian for a while and see what the consequences are
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
@sinclairlewis18 the state fair is overrated
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
i’ve noticed that smart people say “but go off” a lot
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
3 years
many of the problems at woodstock 99 were caused by pent-up frustration with The Phantom Menace
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
29 days
Seems insane David Foster Wallace looked like this
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
@mattyglesias if i were making 3 star wars movies, i would have planned them out first 🤷‍♀️
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
reselling ugly ill-fitting sweaters under the label Lululutheran
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
7 months
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
9 months
men would rather read Wittgenstein than go to therapy
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
the first person to ride a horse was probably drunk
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
@ASFleischman @chris_steller "I would like to allocate more time to dating, though. I need to find a girlfriend. That's why I need to carve out just a little more time. I think maybe even another five to 10 — how much time does a woman want a week? Maybe 10 hours? That's kind of the minimum? I don't know.”
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
11 days
Arnold Horshack?
@RobertaLipp
(((Roberta #SaveOFMD Lipp💋)))
11 days
I’m not naming names because I don’t want a particular kind of attention but there is a major film shoot happening outside my apartment. My block has been transformed into 1969 Greenwich Village. This pic will bio a legendary musician.
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
3 years
so, oldsters, do i have this right? Replacements > REM > Husker Du > Minutemen > U2
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
@pschofie79 best book ever on existentialism
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
16 days
read this as Paul McCartney
@mustLearnMore
mustLearnMore
17 days
@Culture_Crit "That's not real! That can't be real!" <quick search on Google...>:
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
7 months
do people still fight on top of speeding trains? seems like it used to happen a lot
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
3 years
Bongo and I are co-teaching a graduate seminar entitled "Topics in Epistemology" next semester. I brought 6 potential topics to our zoom meeting to select one. In characteristic fashion, Bongo raised powerful objections to each topic. Still no topic.
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
3 years
i will quit twitter for $100,000
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
telling the kids this was Husker Dü
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
11 months
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
real philosophers don’t cancel, they negate
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
@mtaibbi nordstream seems big
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
3 years
Gary Numan is two weeks older than Gary Oldman
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
11 months
telling people this is Dylan posing for Blonde on Blonde
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
7 months
my goal is to have 1 million followers by tomorrow
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
@wesyang i had a creative writing prof in college who couldn’t deal with any sexual themes in our poems *unless* it was related to trauma in some way 🤷‍♀️
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
on the east coast, Iggy Pop is known as Iggy Soda
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 months
Dune: Part II (2024)
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
4 years
@AliceFromQueens Tolstoy has never returned my emails
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
@JoyceCarolOates men would rather sit at a restaurant table, huddled together in a corner, backs to the wall, apprehensive expressions on their faces than go to therapy
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
3 years
even the guys in the Foo Fighters think Husker Du is the better band 🤷
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
Maggie Westrum, 35, looks disheveled in Minneapolis backyard as she's seen for first time in TWO YEARS
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
🤷‍♀️
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
i guess i’ve never really processed the death of mr peanut 🥜
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
3 years
the fast & the furious would be better if they worked together to build a community garden instead of crashing cars
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
4 years
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
3 years
@RobertTalisse in all seriousness, why is higher ed like this?
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
11 months
a Yes cover band named “Yeppers”
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
10 months
@chris_steller alt country album cover
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
4 years
@RadioFreeTom the “again” at the end of the tweet is a nice touch
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
U2 is Journey for Gen X hipsters
@johnpavlovitz
John Pavlovitz
1 year
Give an honest but likely unpopular music take.
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
10 months
Who is the greatest fictional sports player of all time?
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
8 months
if it were Burning Woman, none of this would have happened
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
3 years
@cranstonl1972 The Beverly Hillbillies was the best written and acted sitcom of the 1960s
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
it’s true
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
10 months
i can’t name a james stewart movie i don’t like
@GRCinemaTicket
GR44
10 months
Can you name a James Stewart movie you like??
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 month
who wrote Corinthians? buncha Corinthians, i bet
@TheRhetorRick
Rick Davis
1 month
Matthew wrote Matthew. Mark wrote Mark. Luke wrote Luke. John wrote John.
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
3 years
@wesyang some women - at least on twitter - seem to feel like this is a victory, and frankly i’m disappointed
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
we need a better name for the sun
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
8 months
jus’ sittin’ in a room readin’ books about UFOs
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
3 years
@EthicsInBricks the great existentialist philosopher Charles M. Schulz
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
omicron is an anagram of moronic
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
7 months
got the alert
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
10 months
my religious beliefs in 2016 vs now
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
i was never in the girl scouts but i was in the girl scout reserves, we were called up whenever there was a cookie shortage
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
10 months
Steely Dan vs Danielle Steel
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
7 months
sometimes the smallest football guy is allowed to kick the football but if it doesn’t go through the hoop, he feels shame and the other football guys pat him on the back like they are burping a baby
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
7 months
so, personal ads were just twitter before the internet?
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
10 months
the russian guy from Rocky IV
@bagsfan75_Tony
The Irrelevant Fan
10 months
Who is this? Wrong answers only
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
11 months
in ancient times most people did not have heads or arms
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
7 months
this personal ad is also an accurate description of my twitter account
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
most British royalty is German
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
the leprechauns keep their gold behind minnehaha falls
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
9 months
omg jack black is basically unrecognizable in this photo!
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
@SvenTystnad MST3K made me the person i am today
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
@dhmontgomery rising seniors?
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
My “unpopular” music takes: * “Americana” is country music for Democrats * Even without the Monkees, Mike Nesmith would be an important figure in 60s and 70s pop * Peter Buck was the Mike Nesmith of the 80s * Half the bands in the Rock Hall of Fame don’t deserve to be there
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
4 years
@profgalloway You could charge $750 / month in Manhattan
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
the traffic around chicago is . . . illinoying 😊 please clap
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
@rainnwilson bennifer is derived from the latin meaning “for the benefit of all”
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
just 4 awards away from achieving EGOT status!
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
this is what ai thinks an adjunct professor looks like
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
8 months
you know who also was 6’3” and 215 lbs? fella by the name of jesus
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
9 months
what if God is just a really big guy who lives in outer space?
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
@ludvonrand @kittypurrzog it’s a Russian country house, i think
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
8 months
male only massage parlor named the massagenists
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 months
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
8 months
this child has alien dna
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
2 years
let me dream a little!
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
10 months
going to concerts just to watch the bass player
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
pretty much everything is arbitrary and weird
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
4 years
There’s a better than 50 percent chance that your brother-in-law looks like Patton Oswalt
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@maggiewestrum
Maggie Westrum
1 year
by the end of this week, i shall have solved philosophy
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