becoming christ-like in the wendy’s parking lot

definitive proof that the obsession with "realism" is fundamentally anti-art

she like the way that i dance she like the way that i move she like the way that i rock she like the way that i woo

I hit the juckport 1 trillion$

i'm not immune to the allure of a fast-casual rice bowl

Really don’t get the big deal with gas. just some crap you put in your car. Who cares

googling the omnipresent horn in an attempt to help a friend

Human casualties are obviously the most horrific fallout here but its hard not to think about these ancient cities being bombed to rubble by slobbering dogs & not be furious. They're erasing centuries of human history & snuffing out countless futures & for what? They're goons.

I’m 62 years old, I live in Tampa, I eat corn and beef everyday, I always have a titleist hat on, and Iran is the biggest threat to my freedom

WAYMO CARS HAVE MADE THEIR WAY TO ILLINOIS AND WE NEED LEGISLATORS TO HEAR OUR VOICES! Sign the petition - prioritize people, not robots! https://t.co/NKgqLd3whH

has anyone noticed that it seems especially Over lately

Lakeview East Mariano’s fix your escalator challenge

(activating cyber eyes) What's that thing at the top Surgeon: ah, that's your McDonalds rewards bar. It charges over time, but don't eye-tap the burger button until it's full Me: huh why not (eyes flicker) (flashbang) Sultry female robot voice: insufficient credits, playboy

Grown up sized white baby I’m friends with: The way I be drinking this damn apple juice…ooh chile😂 Me: You can’t be talking like that White Baby.

GRANDMA TEXTING ME: How's it been? Are you still sleeping somewhere warm? ME SENDING A VOICE MEMO: I don't know. Everything is illegal [turn signal sounds] I'm getting awesome. But they made everything illegal

If you tried to introduce public libraries and parks today they’d say it could never be done

My Weekend as a 28-year-old in Chicago Illinois

im staying up late like don draper

i can’t with how many of yall are already settling > 2 years in advance for another fucking bureaucratic centrist who hates homeless people AND already getting pissed at leftists who aren’t happy to accept the scraps of shit and piss that democrats toss at us every election cycle

I enjoy blocking 12 websites on my computer in the hopes of not squandering my life and suddenly becoming addicted to the desktop version of 2048 or google image search results for “Windmill”