salad 𓆉
@molls
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Host of Trend Lightly & Mother, May I Sleep With Podcast?, co-founder of HelloGiggles, founder of Solid Listen Network, gluten-free & hating it
Los Angeles, CA
Joined December 2006
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Last Seen Profiles
Pinned Tweet
Against all reason, I have just published a five hour discussion between me and my friend Jessica about part one of
#TTPD
. For free. Unedited. Please do not dox my mother, she's really great and my behavior is my fault.
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This is breathtaking. I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone fuck themselves this hard.
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Remember how we used to have ‘black pants’ in the 00s? Not jeans, not black office pants. Just black pants to wear with your going out top?
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I will aggressively stan the first celebrity that’s honest about abusing Ozempic
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@alicepelton
@MichaelaOkla
I saw a funeral director on TikTok answer this. Yes, they remove your tampon.
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@ask_aubry
I’m gonna be real with you, I had to read this like 19 times to realize that’s what he was communicating and even now I’m confused about why “mascara” is the analogy used.
Obviously she should apologize to him, but I think this could be a general/generational misunderstanding.
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Not included was his last search at 1:20pm: “can baking soda make a body smell good?”
I’m not kidding.
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@GeauxGabrielle
Yes he did. He just thought he manipulated her enough not to tell on him. If dates are correct, he was doing this before she was pregnant. Go to a pool party with your BFF Nora, meet an unemployed physical trainer, get love bombed, and you’re getting choked out for Valentine’s.
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I’m good. Don’t worry about Christmas or my birthday. My gift was Britney saying she wishes she could go back in time to tell Diane Sawyer she identifies as a Catholic slut.
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If I was Tom Sandoval, I’d be reaching out to whatever Florida hockey social media company that wanted to hire Jax. It’s time to simply leave the state.
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@iammsharriszara
oh, i think writers and curious teens do this all the time. Just don't kill someone whose money you're set to inherit immediately before doing it.
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@ask_aubry
This is rage bait. I can’t bring myself to believe that there’s a person in the world who thinks a woman who is 6mos pregnant is just randomly lazy and getting fat. Unless OP is a teenager. Even then…
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@lyft
@palashp40616755
You absolutely would not have done this unless the backlash had been so huge. A lot of people will never forget you did the very least you could do.
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@SammiePressdee
That’s so fucking cool, Samantha. What valuable testimony. I always said, “I’m not moving on these credible rape accusations unless they didn’t rape Samantha and a variety of other women she knows.”
And congratulations for fitting your resume in here!
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@xSkelejade
@mattxiv
Rebecca is the other girls. She’s exactly who I, and probably you, were afraid of. Sitting, taking mental pics of our bodies as we quickly changed from our wet garment to a T-shirt that kept us covered. I still keep long tops in case of a situation where I may encounter a Rebecca
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@katiesversion89
She might not have signed off on it, but if she’s saying it’s not JoJo’s fault, that means whoever owns this artist’s music is the one responsible.
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@tlcterrycooper
@CarmenGranddau1
That’s a car parked to the side of the road behind a moving vehicle. No need to go full-blown QAnon. It’s weird enough on its own without making up stuff.
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@kittens_stat
@MichaelaOkla
Someone wrote in to my podcast about this once. She got her period the first day (so no commissary money for 2-3 more weeks). She had to make pads w TP. Eventually they gave her a big thick one. ONE. She wore it for a week straight.
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@mattxiv
Get this: Rebecca was the one breaking the rules:
Every YMCA I have ever been to has 4 locker rooms: Men, Women, Boys & Girls. Minors are not allowed to be naked with adults who are not vetted or relatives.
So what Rebecca’s upset about here is that she’s a minor who felt entitled to break the rules & is tattling to town hall.
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@BlackIrisJ
@ZeeZeeMooMoo
@capybaroness
Lol. He didn’t like a woman on a train so he told the cops she had a bomb
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Every YMCA I have ever been to has 4 locker rooms: Men, Women, Boys & Girls. Minors are not allowed to be naked with adults who are not vetted or relatives.
So what Rebecca’s upset about here is that she’s a minor who felt entitled to break the rules & is tattling to town hall.
so the trans woman she’s referring to didn’t even… do anything? she was just minding her business and changing her clothes?
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Do you even understand how major it is for Jojo Siwa to come out? She’s 17. Her products outsold Star Wars last Christmas.
THIS IS BRAVE & I’M SO HAPPY FOR HER.
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@palmerrachelc
I’m laughing because how fucked he is. He also broke his house arrest to buy stuff at Lowe’s that any cashier would look @ and be like, “I’m gonna see him on the news later.”
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@DeSeanB
@ask_aubry
I understand “corn” and “unalive,” et c. because it’s clearer communication, but frankly, I too was like, “why’s this man sharing mascara with people? That’s an eye infection waiting to happen.”
Can anyone explain why this term is the new designated SA word?
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This video of Tracy Morgan singing U2 in an Omaha airport terminal just glued me back together.
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@ask_aubry
He said everything in the meanest way possible. He should file for divorce if he feels this way. Probably already having an affair.
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My pet peeve as I’m reading all the Vanderpump Reddit threads is people sharing the mild/non-opinions their husbands have. I wouldn’t care what your husband thinks if he was in my livingroom. He’s not even invited. This is women’s business.
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@ask_aubry
I would pay money to watch this guy explain to first date after first date that this is the reason his engagement didn’t work out.
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More on the girls (~27 so far) who are getting punched in the face in NYC. Currently the theory is that this is being coordinated on a Discord server by two incels at
@TheNewSchool
. There was the black man in the red jacket who was arrested for punching two women, but (cont’d)
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@ask_aubry
So many men think the reaction they get from women when they do this is funny. They don’t realize the reaction is based on real fear/how vulnerable we feel all the time because we know we can’t protect ourselves from most attacks.
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@GeraldoRivera
You’re embarrassing and he doesn’t have to want to be associated with you just because you’re breathing the same air. Hope that helps.
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@Phil_Lewis_
Remember when Gabby Petito told the Moab police that people saw Brian hit her because her anxiety is so bad that it makes him angry?
(She was anxious about him getting in the van with his dirty bare feet after he sat in a coffee shop all day while she cleaned it)
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@newwavelover_
@amil
If anything, this dye job makes the prospect of it being stolen more likely because it looks like a fucking Murakami pillow
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@jessicalouisee
@kittens_stat
@MichaelaOkla
Oh, babe. They don’t give a shit about that.
I have many incentives for avoiding prison at all costs, but I’d say this is one of the top ones. It’s so difficult to care for basic needs and most COs revel in your discomfort and desperation.
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An exchange student from China moved in to my mom’s building in Boston a few years ago and they became buddies and even roommates for awhile during the pandemic. He just moved to LA so we met. His name is Zemo and he displays his photography in a plastic pocket on his shirt 🥰
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Because you’re all watching this, Taylor the public school girl got into drugs and panhandles on the subway now (very sad) and CT married a woman (non romantic partnership). Also, the cunty girl with brown hair works for that MLM Arbonne.
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@nahss2000
@Neycromancer
@chris
@MrBeast
Says the person without a single follower and a “stop stalking me” bio. You’re fucking delusional. Run along now.
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@theazzyphile
@DeSeanB
@ask_aubry
I’m not overthinking it, I’m trying to understand how tf this incredibly vague analogy to eye makeup is clearly indicating something about a man’s private parts. If people can’t even explain it clearly, how are we all supposed to know?
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Watched The Kardashians premiere. I’m ready to talk about Khloe not loving her surrogate baby whenever you are!
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@seabryze
@PopCrave
She didn’t really hire him as a diversity hire. He explains that NBC has a writer’s program (had?) where a separate budget is allocated for shows to hire “diverse” (marginalized) writers. Basically, NBC will add a writer or two to your show for free to jumpstart new people.
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@chelseaaolson
@BrianEntin
People see the news they want to see these days. I have several people in my life who have no idea any of this is going on and are generally uninterested in anything true crime related. It’s possible his dad hadn’t really heard of it, let alone the Elantra detail.
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@BlackIrisJ
@ZeeZeeMooMoo
@capybaroness
I’ll tell you honestly, I have been laughing at the absurdity of it since I hit “tweet” and I really hope the woman it happened to can laugh about it too cuz it’s fuckin nuts.
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Oh, and they can’t do it in their book about their thyroid cancer journey or failing kidneys or whatever. They need to YOLO it.
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I actually cannot believe how famous Caroline Calloway’s haters have made her. It’s been like, almost 4 years since that Natalie piece. The people who claim to despise her have kept her so relevant that she gets a Vanity Fair profile. Look at yourselves.
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I think it’s really tacky to take your mom’s retirement fund and light it on fire because you’re porking your girlfriend’s friend 🥰
Thank god for Katie’s mom and Kristina Kelly and LaLa for having Katie’s back 💕
#PumpRules
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@KTenpas
@ask_aubry
I literally wouldn’t have even imagined this was the case. I’m extraordinarily online, albeit a millennial, and I wouldn’t have come to that conclusion at all. And I really don’t read hashtags, which I guess would be the only indicator for those not in the loop?
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So many people have asked me what I’m doing for Easter like it would be normal for me, as a childless woman who isn’t religious, to be doing ANYTHING. Is this a trap? Are you trying to get me arrested?
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@chescaleigh
I’m so fascinated by the livestreams out of somewhere in Asia where it’s a person sleeping but every time someone sends an award, a siren or fart noise or something goes off and they just have to act tired and annoyed. It’s kinda a a avant garde to me. Kind of chic.
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I’m tired of guessing! Please tell me why you do public Venmo exchanges! What is the benefit of people seeing how you spend/recieve money?
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@kristenbain88
@alicepelton
@MichaelaOkla
Well. This was the end for me. Thank you. (I can’t remember if they said they also remove your IUD before cremation. There was another thing that was like, “oh”).
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@LuckyovLegends
We’re still in a pandemic that started 3 years ago. If I did this, I’d have the self-awareness to keep it to myself!!!
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@katiesversion89
She probably engaged in the standard industry practice of purchasing a demo and recording her version. The majority of pop acts do this, you don’t need to act as if she plagiarized a song bc you don’t care for her.
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Jamie Lynn Spears: “I guess my whole life, I felt like I didn’t matter.”
You guessed right, you lil rat!
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@theazzyphile
@DeSeanB
@ask_aubry
Wait, follow up question, but wouldn’t the “it’s ruined because someone used it” explanation make more sense if it was a commentary on saving yourself for marriage/purity culture?
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Just made my account private so it’s just like 40k of us here. I love our secrets. 😌
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@thatsnotmustard
@ask_aubry
A father/son moment is going to a baseball game or something. Christmas is a family affair. I don’t know that he hates her, but this was at least thoughtless. I find casual cruelty/thoughtlessness to be more damaging than some asshole sabotaging my chance at a memory.
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@bitch_rights
Sometimes I’ll still get someone being like, “wait, part your hair in the middle.”
No. Stop trying to work against me.
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@Rainingopal
@visenyasdaughtr
You can simply say “no, I’m not interested,” and move on with your life? And who is telling you to be a surrogate? Is this truly a frequent occurrence? Are you already a parent? Because legally you cannot be one unless you’ve already successfully carried a child to term.
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Why aren’t we asking Jimmy Fallon to apologize for letting Justin Timberlake think he’s funny?
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@WonderMonkey78
@chrissyteigen
The sixth toe (third from big toe) is the nude nail polish on her second toenail.
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Thinking about this woman who left this comment on a clip of The Truman Show
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@jaderj1209
@g3minij0hn
He would have fucked it up in 3. Sounds like he couldn’t take directions on how to give a clean sound byte. Not made out for his platforms of choice.
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What do you think are the most popular places to fuck at Disneyland? Please no jokes, I am dead serious.
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@CatherineKLind
@BarstoolBigCat
@PardonMyTake
No way. This is the exact way she hates being spoken about and it’s really hard to retrain the public’s opinion of you. She’s been there, done that.
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Now that I got my Uggs, lemme remind you that if you wear a women’s size 8, you’re a Big Kids 6. They’re like $60 less and that’s weed money.
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@fr0_girl
I’ll never forget, I watched it live! but I’m pretty sure she was on drugs and under the impression she was helping. She wanted to let the mom stay for the night too but just didn’t want a man in her room (fair line of thought re: her safety). It was a dark time for her.
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