Carli Humphries
@carlihumphries
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Stories + Strategy | Fashion • Beauty • Travel | “Never Knowingly Underdressed.”
London, England
Joined January 2017
I thought this was an extract from a new Jilly Cooper but Jilly writes too well for this to be hers.
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Good with words sure, but does she have anything to say? Introducing I Am Not A Muse… https://t.co/ClXWA7EECm
@SubstackInc
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Daily affirmation: I am smart, capable and have perfect tits
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no i will NOT be reading your article on “60 easy dinners that take less than 30 minutes.” have you heard of cereal
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I believe the main difference is that one will see you later and the other will see you in awhile. I could be wrong, I'm not a zoologist.
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Woman (receiving a massive hug from a friend she has just met): Hi! (she steps back and looks at her) Your human face! Your beautiful human face.
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Page not found.. my web team think they're so funny.
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Inside every woman is two wolves. One wolf want long gorgeous mermaid hair. The second wolf wants to just chop it all off. There is also a crow pulling the tails of both wolves saying to get bangs. The crow is the most dangerous.
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Feeling this tbh
ugh i have to pull an all-dayer today
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POV: Your girl asks you to take a pic of her on holiday 🌴📸
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Yes to everything about this article! Sustainability needs a compelling and doable narrative - step forward storytelling! #sustainablesolutions #storytelling #planetplacing
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having boobs in the summer pros: looking incredible in sun dresses cons: literally everything else
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If you don’t listen already then you must get on board… these dudes are just brilliant @RomeshRanga @BigTomD
podcasts.apple.com
Comedy Podcast · Updated weekly · Comedians Tom Davis (The Wolf) and Romesh Ranganathan (The Owl) shoot the breeze for an hour a week because they couldn’t work out a format. They also take on...
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Very slow day for us today 😕 Please come and support us if you are in town tomorrow or next week and fancy a coffee and some cake. We can only carry on the work we do if we have customers through the door.
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I was sent this by a friend before but it still makes me cackle.
I don't mean to be needlessly controversial but we need to talk about Postman Pat. That guy is utterly incompetent & I'm so sick of his bullshit. Any other job & he'd be sacked. He delivers like one parcel a day. ONE! And it takes him all day, even when he uses one of the
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‘Let’s just throw out the rule book.’ ‘You mean like…an open collar?’ ‘Gasp!’
Absolute fashion anarchy here from Charles Tyrwhitt. I don’t even know what I’m looking at. Wow.
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This is absolutely brilliant
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posting on instagram stories is so fucking weird until you have a crush and then it becomes Your Life’s Work
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