Bill Buttlicker
@bloatyhead
Followers
1,309
Following
492
Media
9,524
Statuses
101,001
My prices have never been lower Let's put on our classics and we'll have a little dance shall we? Football account @bloatyheader
Joined January 2009
Don't wanna be here?
Send us removal request.
Explore trending content on Musk Viewer
Toni Kroos
• 285378 Tweets
England
• 123858 Tweets
Reich
• 102313 Tweets
Euro 2024
• 81391 Tweets
#お迎え渋谷くん
• 50175 Tweets
招待コード
• 48808 Tweets
ソフトバンク
• 46492 Tweets
Rashford
• 40521 Tweets
Singapore Airlines
• 38862 Tweets
#刀剣乱舞廻
• 37433 Tweets
#2024해피수호데이
• 36592 Tweets
Modric
• 34733 Tweets
$Retik
• 30300 Tweets
Southgate
• 28601 Tweets
Grealish
• 26206 Tweets
ホークス
• 24263 Tweets
Dunk
• 23963 Tweets
كروس
• 22819 Tweets
Starc
• 22701 Tweets
#KKRvsSRH
• 22667 Tweets
Pote
• 18522 Tweets
クロース
• 18286 Tweets
Shaw
• 17044 Tweets
ROCKSTAR PRINCE SUHO DAY
• 16924 Tweets
完全新作
• 15191 Tweets
Sancho
• 14187 Tweets
#日野下花帆生誕祭2024
• 10054 Tweets
you could take one hundred guesses at how this fight ends and not get the correct answer
549
4K
33K
SPOILERS: the best way to save £30,000 is to be given £15,000
19
2K
8K
I’m 32 years old and I run a £0 portfolio of companies. This is my daily routine:
20
674
7K
feels like I'm wearing nothing at all
nothing at all
nothing at all
47
1K
4K
if we're closing things because of isolated, be they tragic, incidents, may I suggest we start with The Met
The Met has requested the permanent closure of the O2 Brixton Academy, following a deadly crowd crush in December
73
181
338
2
191
1K
@loosewomen
weird that a show almost entirely devoted to moaning about stuff would be against protest isn't it
1
3
531
obsessed with some of the tat for sale on that NHS auction site. Chris Evans is using it like fucking Gumtree
5
34
333
Been thinking about this recently, so here's a definitive ranking of all the cities in the UK. I will be taking no further questions at this time.
49
67
307
what do you mean there's no such thing as British culture?
10
48
303
- Mario going through a crisis of confidence
0
23
244
To every person considering tweeting me to say "surely the easiest way would be to inherit £30,000" please, I beg you, consider it already said.
3
7
190
not doing a four hundred tweet threads so here's the tldr; last night at closing time I saw an Aldi worker lay out an aggressive customer by absolutely walloping him in the temple with what I can only describe as a comedy-sized ham. Pay supermarket workers footballer's wages.
2
11
198
Farage signing in and out of MSN Messenger repeatedly hoping the Tories notice him
0
40
180
the rumours are true
0
7
167
@CapableOfFlight
mate every time I see this is takes a year off my life, please stop posting it
2
0
166
not a great believer in karma but it's fun that Toni Kroos' life has gone to shit ever since he threw his teammate under the bus for suggesting he'd been on the end of racist abuse innit
2
51
160
Jack Grealish
Who is the Muppet you hold in the highest esteem? Not the one you like the best, the one you respect the most. Mine is Grover
2K
450
13K
0
11
162
"Anyone can wear a Yankees hat - Yankees fans, tourists, undercover cops - it takes a real one to wear a Mets hat" -
@Kofie
playing it down the line on Twitch, Friday is gonna be a good one
0
5
165
the full edit of All My Friends by LCD Soundsystem lasts longer than Kwasi Kwarteng was chancellor
1
17
163
FORTY NINE FORTY NINE UNDEFEATED//
FORTY NINE FORTY NINE I SAY//
FOURTEEN YEARS AGO WE COMPETED//
NOW WE LOSE AT BOURNEMOUTH AWAY
3
61
159
If you're in a pub today, find a way to tip your servers. I don't care if you have to stick a tenner in their back pocket when they're not looking, make it happen
0
35
148
@2212scotty
@LlamaBusiness
@MayorofLondon
I stand with Scotty here, if landlords hadn't bought up all those houses to rent privately they would have simply vanished into thin air
1
1
140
noticed this the other night, genuinely terrifying
The marketing company behind Smile (2022) paid actors sit in the stands & smile at multiple MLB games recently.
47
284
2K
2
7
135
new guy at work drinks, almost exclusively, plain hot water. absolute serial killer behaviour.
8
3
121
Sam Ryder and Mel C doing When You're Gone on the telly, what a way to see in the new year
4
10
119
the way these legends speak about Paul Scholes 😍😍😍 Simply the best ❤️
2
37
114
It's my wife
It's now or never
Borat voice will live forever
1
24
105
Obviously it's a real shame all round, but there's something undeniably hilarious about When We Were Young accidentally pulling off the heist of the century against all odds and then a windy boy coming in last minute and ruining the whole thing
0
18
110
...and she would've gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you pesky hips
0
50
99
Jeremy Corbyn already doing the Lord's work
Spotify: "We can confirm that Taylor Swift’s entire back catalogue is now available on Spotify for her millions of fans to enjoy."
1
18
25
1
42
93
Me, zero pints: Wenger leaving is very upsetting
Me, two pints: everything is fine
Me, four pints: this is very bad but we'll put things into perspective
Me, five pints: this is the end of my life, throw me into a volcano
0
24
89
*slaps roof of Wembley*
this bad boy can fit so much Emeli Sande on it
0
7
96
No Europe for one year
In fact, make it two
Let's see who's got the best
#ValentinesDay
rhymes 💙
Roses are red,
Manchester is blue,
__________
__________
3K
783
5K
0
14
85
Go on, tell me this isn’t the best one-second Vine you’ve ever seen. Go on.
9
141
83
@Serena_Partrick
@missuonmylips
@roisinmurphy
@DollardDes
Google "how to cut a fringe" champ, and show it to your hairdresser next time
16
1
84
1
9
85
@TheStevenThomas
@jeremycorbyn
and I trust you'll be advocating for Labour to put forward some actual policies and stand on a platform that isn't "we're a slightly different shade of blue"?
11
0
82
thoughts and prayers out to the your man in the Knight's Templar who just loudly bragged to the woman at the bar that he could easily carry five pints of Guinness without a tray and almost immediately dropped the lot
3
25
78
Every time Los Camp do anything maj I start getting notifications from my old Tumblr with a thousand reblogs of this piece of shit
2
20
79
If it makes you feel any better mate, no-one thinks you're joking
1
9
73
"The Cream In Your Coffee"
"Your Favourite Footballer’s Favourite Footballer”
"The Physical Embodiment Of Charisma"
"The French Cannon"
"The 93rd Minute Man"
"Mr Scorpionrana"
“Olly Football“
"The Main Event"
"The King Of Taunts"
"The Product"
3
45
72
checking exchange rates for a trip to New York next month
1
7
66
could be the lingering hangover but I've been snorting at this for a solid five minutes
2
1
68
sad to report that I may have ordered the wrong-sized magnets for holding our airing cupboard door shut
3
1
67
yeah sure I got A-levels
A
Looming
Exhausting
Vicious
Ever-present
Lack of
Self-worth
0
26
66
maybe it's my COVID-addled brain but the sentence "Fart jokes in the Beano, is this what its's come to?" has fucking sent me
@xannov
Fart jokes in "The Beano" ?! Is this what it's come to?
Back in the days, there just used to be little things like a little sign pointing along a running track, saying "Finish line 150 000 cm." .....
12
0
14
3
5
63
in light of Pep's criticism of Wenger, Ferguson and Mourinho I crunched the numbers and thought the results were interesting
4
33
55
Imagine meeting the love of your life and discovering that they don't get their oyster card ready until they're standing at the barriers
6
6
56
YOUNG MAN
is your data secure?
don't FALL FOUL
to identity fraud
when proCESSING
you need to be sure
you have
ex
pli
cit
per
mission
DER DER DER DER DER
It's fun to be compliant
GEE-DEE-PEE-AR
GEE-DEE-PEE-AR
destroy everything
that's unnecessary
subject access requests are free
2
25
55
"they didn't pour my pint quickly enough and a man was eating some pork scratchings"
3
0
53
put him in there with Emery and I'm sold
4
1
38
1
17
56
@Pizza_Suplex
imagine being the reddest, sweatiest man on a broadcast featuring Brock Lesnar and an eighty year-old Kurt Angle
0
1
54
The Arsene Wenger Retirement Tour: Shut Up And Play The Hits
1
14
53
[A Thousand Miles piano plays gently in the background]
.....
.....
.....
EATING MY LUNCH AT TEN
MY HEAD BOWED
I'M NOT PROUD
I'M A SCUMBAG
DERDILLY DERDILLY DERRRR
3
9
48
YOUR OWN
TRANSIENT
ANUS
The warty comb jelly has been found to have a "transient anus" that forms only when it needs to defecate
242
660
2K
3
7
48
less than zero chance Levy paid full price for his ticket, reckon he turned up on the door with a fiver and Bryan Gil and said "take it or leave it"
0
6
50