darren incorvaia
@MegaDarren
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PhD 🐝 | science journalist | words @nytimes @sciam @ScienceNews @undarkmag @Reductress and more | inveterate invertebrate evangelist
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Joined March 2013
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After rats arrived on Lord Howe Island, the island's iconic stick insect was quickly driven to extinction...or was it? I visited the San Diego Zoo to learn about the international effort to bring "tree lobsters" back from the brink 🦞My feature in the NYT!
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Just learned that Dutch scientists left a hamster wheel outside in 2014 and saw that tons of wild mice used it just for fun as well as frogs and slugs? All the creatures of the forest wanted a turn?? Absolutely phenomenal
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Obsessed with this study where they thought giving pair-bonded Mongolian gerbils testosterone would make them aggressive but instead it made them cuddle their mates more and also they look like THIS
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The Art Institute has many world-famous masterpieces but more importantly it has this little freak
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Reading a paper about roly-polies and how they have little personalities and now I'm hooked
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Becoming a TA has made me realize that every time I thought I’d pulled a fast one on my professors they were really just too tired to bother attempting to correct my behavior
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After 33 rejections from McSweeneys over several years, I am happy to announce that today I received my 34th rejection!!!
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Baby horseshoe crabs are just like the adults but tiny and I’m losing my goddamn mind
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Email from your university three seconds after graduating
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Here's the paper!
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BEE FACT: Bees can’t see the color red, but they can see that you’re thinking about going to grad school and would advise you to reconsider
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Raise your hand if you were a gifted child who loved reading and now as an adult you never read because our overbearing capitalist society sucks up too much of our free time in the name of productivity in a way that has nothing to do with being a gifted child
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Scientists will say “Briefly,” before the longest run-on sentence you’ve ever seen in your life
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Scientists when the p-value is 0.06 vs. when it’s 0.05
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incredible unforced error by NPR here. Legendary snub of the most famously overlooked woman scientist in history
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Anyone who thinks these books are worth reading is to be avoided at all costs
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When my boss asks me to do the job that I was hired to do
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Feeling like a velvet worm today: under-appreciated, cute in a weird way, incapable of higher cognitive functions
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In case you were wondering, for Santa, in a single 24-hr Earth-night, to deliver presents to all those who celebrate Christmas, he must visit 25,000 homes per second.
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Just learned that LaTeX is pronounced lay-tech, not lay-tex. What's next? Will someone tell me R is actually pronounced urrr??
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Don’t mind me just remembering how in my dissertation defense intro my PhD advisor described me as a “leftist bomb thrower” bc I was in the grad student union lmao
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Bush dogs look like if you smashed every other carnivore species together and then made it chonky. They are the perfect mammal
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Link to study:
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Getting a phd at the same place you went to undergrad is a great way to feel like you've been in grad school for a thousand years
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@taylorgarron
I’ve worn the same sweatpants every day for months, where’s my ny post article??
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Woke up early to get some reading and writing done and I regret to inform you that being productive first thing in the morning does in fact make you feel good about yourself
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Grad school was tough but it gave me great lifelong learning skills. Now when I don't understand something I don't shake my head and give up, I spend three days obsessively trying to wrap my mind around it before shaking my head and giving up
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Friendly reminder that ICE was only formed in 2003, so wanting to abolish it is in no way a radical position
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If I see one more “the government faked coronavirus so they can change the batteries in the birds” tweet I’m gonna scream. Obviously the birds run on solar power
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Scientists and scicommers, I am begging you: read less science. Read history (including history of science). Read anti-racism. Read biographies. Read novels. Read comic books / graphic novels. Prioritize reading non-white authors. Your work, and life, will be better for it
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Scientists complaining about a groundhog “predicting” the weather are missing a golden opportunity to lighten the fuck up
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So thrilled to announce that I’ve accepted an offer to join The Field Museum as a grant writer! I can’t wait to begin and get to know all the fabulous folks at the museum, including my new coworker Sue the T-Rex 🦖😁
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There are people from my high school class who have married, had children, divorced, and remarried meanwhile I just whispered “good luck” to my stuffed bear before putting him through the washer
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Paper:
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Feeling saucy so I’m gonna say it: all academic departments should require their faculty to do outreach / extension to the local community
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Watched an episode of the closer last night and they mentioned a guy made his income by “publishing articles in academic journals” and my partner and I both screamed at the same time
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Is all of writing just...putting words on a page and then hoping that other people don’t think you’re stupid for picking those words
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This hyrax just learned his closest living relatives are elephants and manatees and is looking forward to the next family reunion
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This is the ideal male body. You might not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like
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My contribution to the “is it okay to be friends with racists who are nice to you” discourse in science twitter is:
no
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I don’t see what’s so impressive about ChatGPT. I’ve been using big words to sound smart without actually understanding what’s going on for years now
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I’ve got the best valentine in the world and it’s not close 😤🥰
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Our August move to Berkeley is finally public, so at last I can say: I need a new job! Someone give me a job!! I like writing, science, journalism, comedy, bees, and more…but would love to be science writing full time 😎 if you have a job in the Bay Area, reach out please 🙏
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Please tell me that researchers who go out and collect wild bees call themselves bee-searchers
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I'm 28 years old, have an entire PhD, and just spent the first half hour of my work day fighting with a printer (I lost). Somehow I am simultaneously paid too much for this and also not paid enough for this
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Daphnia when there are no predators vs. Daphnia when there are predators
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Grad school pro tip: you don’t have to defend your dissertation if you raise it to stand up for itself
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Tell SETI to stop looking for aliens we already have star-nosed moles at home
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My resubmitted manuscript has been accepted with minor revisions!! I’m gonna be a first author!!!
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(Talking to a straight couple) so, who’s the rom and who’s the com?
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Everyone say good luck Sanjana on your first day as an NSF postdoc!! ⭐️
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BEE FACT: Bees are basically just vegetarian wasps, but even if they weren’t their pure hearts would still object to your baseless wasp slander
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If statisticians are so clever why haven’t they found a way to transform 2020 to make it normal?
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For anyone who thinks scientists are paid to follow some secret agenda: I've been waiting for conference travel reimbursement for almost two months now. Nobody is rushing to pay us I promise
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Once had sleep paralysis and saw a demon on the ceiling whispering to me in tongues, and honestly I wish he’d stuck around it’s hard to make friends as an adult
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Honestly getting tired of Duolingo coming for my neck like this
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2022 had its lows, but the highs were incredible: I became a Reductress contributor; was published in Science News, Scientific American, and The New York Times (!!!); wrote/directed my own sketch show; traveled to beautiful places; and met the love of my life.
Here’s to 2023! 🐝
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In a new relationship? Be sure to ask these important questions early! It can be awkward but it’s better to know their answers sooner rather than finding out you’re incompatible down the line
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BEE FACT: 75% of bee species live solitary lives, but that’s okay they’re just focusing on their careers right now
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Sorry I’m late students I have to give my puppy exactly one million kisses every morning or she won’t grow up knowing she’s loved and valued
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Me after writing “affects” then deleting it and writing “effects” then deleting it and writing “impacts”
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Cobra: I have a cool hood and can spit venom to scare my enemies away. What about you?
Rattlesnake:
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You’re right, nobody cares
Probably nobody cares, but the
@NBC
Peacock feathers don’t match the sequence of those six colors in the actual electromagnetic spectrum. Just sayin'.
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@Shanemgillis
I, too, like to push the boundaries of comedy by repeating things white men have said forever
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@jaboukie
such a headscratcher. i just really wish there was some obvious solution staring us in the face
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My thoughts when they're in my head vs. when they're written down
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Here we see Pipin, a Goffin's cockatoo, plan ahead by picking up both tools needed to get to a tasty cashew. These cockatoos are only the third animal--besides us and chimps--to plan tool use in this way!
Video by
@BioTay
and full story here:
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Early amniotes: We can't colonize land because our embryos will dry out!
Evolution:
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My wisdom teeth have sat quietly in my head for 25 years and then decide a GLOBAL PANDEMIC is the time to start acting up?? the AUDACITY
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Scientists: how do we get the public to trust us and listen to us??
Also scientists: your cherished and fun traditions are stupid and wrong
Scientists complaining about a groundhog “predicting” the weather are missing a golden opportunity to lighten the fuck up
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Isn’t it possible that both capitalism and communism are wrong, and the correct answer is bees?
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