David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps) @DamJef profile

David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

Followers

1,100

Following

2,811

Media

10,629

Statuses

72,090

The sportos, the motorheads, geeks, sluts, bloods, wasteoids, dweebies, dickheads. They all adore him. They think he's a righteous dude.

https://t.co/BREKNTy2wy

Scotland

Joined March 2009

Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

7 years

Choose life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose football. Choose being Chelsea's new backup central defender.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

3 years

A frankly staggering tweet from @SkyNews .

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

5 years

My cats, between 2am and 6am. Every. Fucking. Night.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

1 month

The following tweet is meant solely for the guy at tonight’s amazing gig in Glasgow by The Smile, sitting downstairs in the stalls, row X, seat no. 18. The rest of you can disregard the following message. It is only for the man in X18. I think he had a red top on.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

4 years

Caught an old episode of Kojak the other night when I couldn’t sleep. Can only see Brendan Rodgers now.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

2 years

John Silk

@JSilk

2 years

"Novak is currently in a room which no one can enter," Djokovic's father, Srdjan Djokovic, told the B92 internet portal. "In front of the room are two policemen."

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

7 years

I see Kelvin Mackenzie's being fired from The Sun. I was rather hoping he'd be fired into the Sun but one step at a time.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

3 months

God bless whoever just called Douglas Ross a fucking wanker live on C4 news.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

8 years

I'm assuming this was an upturned rake collision.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

1 month

SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU CLATTERING MONOTONOUS CUNT! NOBODY PAID £50 ODD QUID TO HEAR FUCKFACE BOB THE CUNT IN X18 HONKING LIKE A FRESHLY CASTRATED FUCKING GOOSE OVER THE TOP OF THOM YORKE.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

5 years

For those of a certain age, this is golden.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

1 month

OF COURSE YOU DIDN’T JUST SPOIL THOSE PARTS OF THE SHOW WHERE THERE WAS SINGING THO DID YOU?!? NO YOU COULDN’T HELP BUT FUCKING “SING” THE FUCKING GUITAR PARTS AS WELL COULD YOU?!? LIKE PETER FUCKING FRAMPTON EXCEPT MORE OF A CUNT. PETER FRAMPCUNT.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

9 years

In Birmingham, the local death squads go by the name of Quran Quran. #foxnewsfacts http://t.co/xHXFtPUHxZ

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

5 years

Pretty sure Nick Cave's just blown three darts at double-16 in that picture.

Rolling Stone

@RollingStone

5 years

Nick Cave paid tribute to the late Daniel Johnston with a cover of "Devil Town." Watch here

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

1 month

SO YOU KNOW EVERY WORD? WELL FUCKING DONE MATE. WHAT A FUCKING LEGEND. YOU MUST BE THE SMILE’S BIGGEST FAN? WE ARE NOTHING COMPARED TO YOU. WE BOW AT YOUR FEET. WE SALUTE YOUR HEROISM. THEIR BIGGEST FAN. EXCEPT YOU’RE ACTUALLY JUST THEIR BIGGEST CUNT.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

2 years

Ian Brown resale ticket value...

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

7 years

To be honest this just sounds like Friday night at T in the Park. #fyrefestival

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

10 months

Rina Sawayama aiming both barrels at Matt Healy and not missing.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

7 years

RIP Barry Norman. We've lost another of the South Pacific sailors.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

4 years

Can only hear this in the voice of Mark E Smith

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

3 years

I have had it with these motherfuckin’ snakes on this motherfuckin’ road between Manor House and Finsbury Park.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

8 years

You spelt "woman" wrong.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

5 months

Completely abhorrent but sadly the inevitable trajectory of society's obsession with murder as entertainment.

Matthew Holehouse

@mattholehouse

5 months

Really?

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

4 years

Incredible to see wildlife return to the streets of Paris.

Emmanuelle Hoss

@EmmanuelleHoss

4 years

Ce soir à #paris19 , c’était ambiance #StayingAlive et ça fait du bien. #CONFINEMENTJOUR11

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

4 years

@garyraikes2

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

9 months

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

9 years

The best reaction to last night's Eastenders. http://t.co/owNdQpTxj9

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

2 years

Off to bed. Remember kids, don’t feed the trolls. Ignore them and they magically go away.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

3 years

Kent sowing Kent reaping

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

3 years

@Caulimovirus @EddieRobson Not to forget....

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

11 years

#AskHarry How difficult was it going over Niagara Falls in a barrel dressed as a woman? http://t.co/TtKdwkYRZX

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

8 years

People in and around Paisley please share.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

2 years

Happy Birthday!

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

5 years

Next up we need to track down the bloke that called Matt Bianco a bunch of wankers.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

2 years

Can't believe they've put 7 members of the royal family on the same plane up to Aberdeen. One stuck undercarriage and we might end up with fucking Eugenie in charge by the end of the day!

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

3 years

When you see Graham Linehan trending.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

10 years

BBC Scotland move Sally Magnusson between reports to obscure blue "45" sign on the squinty bridge. http://t.co/xt36fyivYp

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

2 years

I remember seeing Dogging Lesbians Arseful Party supporting Cud at the Sheffield Leadmill back in 1990.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

1 year

Tim Lovejoy’s tiny mind has just been blown by the existence of the Forth road bridge.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

3 years

Daniel W. Drezner

@dandrezner

3 years

Four stills from a movie you believe is a masterpiece, no title.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

3 years

@AdrianEdmondson Hope someone gave Devlin a helmet

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

5 years

Are Yule and Fitz-James the same person? #universitychallenge

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

5 years

And then there were four. RIP Richard Baker.

David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

7 years

RIP Barry Norman. We've lost another of the South Pacific sailors.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

3 years

Pretty sure the answer was Grease mate.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

3 years

@ibroxrocks Remember this St Johnstone tackle on Roofe back in August? Yellow card.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

4 years

You mean mid-50’s, former minister, Tory MP, Mark Francois? Yeah, not seen him for a while come to think of it.

PuzzledPolitico

@Cat_n_Bagpipes

4 years

Is Mark Francois not very well? He doesn't seem to be Chair of the ERG any more. And I was sorry not to hear his insights on the Rule Britannia debate. I hope he recovers soon.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

5 years

@Film4

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

2 years

Sad sad news about Ronnie Spector. What a voice she had. Rest easy Ronnie.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

4 years

Settling back into a midfield battle. Can see this one going the distance.

Bayer 04 Leverkusen

@bayer04_en

4 years

Our opponents have noticed our efforts on the right flank and have made a decent block, but we go again... ⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️ ⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️ ⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️ ⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️ ⚪️🔴🐯⚪️⚪️🔴⚪️ ⚪️🐯🔴🔴⚪️🐯⚪️ 🐯🐯🔴🐯⚪️🔴⚪️ 🔴🐯🐯🐯🔴🔴⚪️

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

3 years

Spare a thought for Ice T this Christmas. #RIPBoycie

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

1 year

@ibroxrocks Too right. As well as that, wait for the first time he walks into a room and forgets what he went in for.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

7 years

. @hrtbps is - quite simply - the very best of us.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

4 years

@jamajestical This is up there.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

7 years

TFW when you try to be hilarious but you totally fuck it.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

6 years

Rare unseen footage of Princess Leia out for a stroll with Yoda on Tatooine.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

1 year

In fairness to Ticketmaster this is a tough tour to take on.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

5 years

@MarikaHackman @theweeknd I'm pretty sure the new Cupcakke track must be about him ...

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

5 years

Andy Wigmore drawing attention to a report that clearly states that the petition is genuine and has not been infiltrated by oversees bots is quite the look.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

1 month

@Thr1llhous Oh mate. I mean the really sad part to this is that she missed the best part of the show.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

2 years

Subscribes for further updates….

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

2 years

@tarantwina @guardian I believe that’s the Babadook.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

5 years

Luscious white vinyl from Little Simz.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

3 years

Sky showing their dedication to Scottish football by using Scott Brown to advertise the Old Firm.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

2 years

@MintRoyale @sam_bambs @StateOfLinkedIn He’s working as the security guy at the hotel. That’s why they let him stay there. 24 CCTV monitors.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

5 years

@stu_fraser "roger federer is a once in a generation player"

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

1 year

24th gig of the year and definitely the loudest. Mogwai at the Barras is a very special mix.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

1 year

Someone needs to tell the Qatar authorities that the trumpet is a potent symbol of homosexuality.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

6 years

@ibroxrocks Pele! Socrates! Carmen Miranda! Karen Jardel! That lassie fae Deadpool! Ayrton Senna! Can you hear me Ayrton Senna? Your boys took a helluva beating! A helluva beating.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

3 years

Just came downstairs to find the cat watching The Graduate.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

3 years

It’s been a year since Hull City’s dramatic victory over Bayer Leverkusen at Connect 4. The victory sealed at 6 minutes past midnight on the 15th. A lockdown sporting moment we will never forget. @HullCity @bayer04_en

Hull City

@HullCity

4 years

IT’S ALL OVER!!!! THE TIGERS HAVE DONE IT!!! ⚪️🐯🐯🐯⚪️⚪️⚪️ ⚪️🔴🐯🔴⚪️🐯⚪️ ⚪️🐯🔴🔴⚪️🔴⚪️ ⚪️🐯🐯🔴⚪️🔴🔴 ⚪️🔴🐯🐯⚪️🔴🐯 🐯🐯🔴🔴⚪️🐯🔴 🐯🐯🔴🐯🐯🔴🔴 🔴🐯🐯🐯🔴🔴🔴 #HULB04 | #hcafc | #theTigers

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

4 years

Weekend at Bernie’s (1989)

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

2 years

Fair play to Sam Fender. Would have been significantly easier in the current climate to have kept his head down and said nothing.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

6 years

Cilla! Every time. Total genius.

Cold War Steve

@coldwarsteve

6 years

To celebrate my appointment as Creative Director for Festival of Brexit - it’s cheese rolling (re-mastered)

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

4 years

@EleanorMargolis @Perlalaloca I previously turned this into a Belle & Sebastian album cover.

David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

6 years

There you go.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

9 months

@shockproofbeats @jlsinc

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

10 years

Michael Gove introduces his local syllabus for local people. http://t.co/GwlD6kL6KO

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

3 years

What a life he's had. Sticks down Charlie. RIP

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

5 years

So it turns out that putting on a giant cat mask and sneaking up on your cats while they’re eating is not a good idea.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

11 months

@Dimonator They pointed out the ball girl was crying. Probably due to the fuss being made by them more than any pain from being hit by the ball.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

10 years

Highlight of my night. http://t.co/LCZSlFF8us

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

2 years

Run The Jewels destroying the Barras for the second night running. @runjewels @KillerMike @therealelp

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

6 years

Interrupted Ben practicing his street magic.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

3 years

@SirBenfro @EwaSR

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

2 years

I thought a Polish player would stop Jabeur from winning #RolandGarros . Just not that Polish player.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

1 year

@petepaphides I see your Vince Hilaire and I raise you...

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

2 years

@bitethumb @AlabasterMiss @carriageworks_ Plus now you have a great quote to out on your posters!

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

3 years

@dannywallace Is it not an hour less of next-to-nothing?

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

2 years

30yrs ago today I was backstage at the Reading Festival when I became aware of a very tall, very hairy presence appearing out the gloom. I grabbed my camera and took one of the worst pics of all time. That ends my Ted Talk, “The Day I Took A Photo Of Krist Novoselic”. Thanks.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

11 months

Remember kids. It’s ok to like Arctic Monkeys. It’s ok to like Guns n Roses. It’s ok to like Lana Del Rey. It’s ok to like Lizzo, Billie NoMates, Sparks, Carly Rae Jepsen, Elton. It’s NOT OK to take a massive fucking flag with a lame as fuck joke on it to a fucking festival.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

2 years

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

3 years

@bencsmoke @Scientits

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

5 years

Got a cat on my head. You?

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

8 months

After The 1975 in Malaysia and The Killers in Georgia, Boygenius had their own international incident last night in Dublin by asking everyone to hold up pictures of their dogs. Someone showed a cat, reopening centuries old rivalries in the crowd.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

6 years

I don’t want any dialogue. I don’t want any back stories. I don’t want any plot. I don’t want any new characters. I don’t want any cast. I just want 90 minutes with a coyote and a road runner and some Acme products. #perfection

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

4 years

I’m going to assume all these people live in the same house.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

6 years

@SimonNRicketts @jamieeast We are all the guy in the black top.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

1 year

The registration process for Mastodon is so complicated I chose the wrong option and now I'm their new bass guitarist.

John Fidler

@johnfidler

1 year

Because of the order that Google lists its search results, I imagine a lot of people are inadvertently finding out about the heavy metal band Mastodon at the moment.

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David J (aka damjef on all good social media apps)

@DamJef

4 years

That’s Utopia. Eugenics is the comedian who plays the father in Outnumbered.

Gabby Hutchinson Crouch

@Scriblit

4 years

That's Euphoria. Eugenics is a philosophical book about an imaginary land, written by Sir Thomas More.

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