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@rigby113
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Last Seen Profiles
If this was old twitter there would be an account called Ian Wright’s big coat
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Looks like someone coming out the back room of a newsagents
23-year old Mexican rapper Dansur, surgically implants gold chains into his head to serve as his hair 👀
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Off to my higher paid job. Not sure what I was thinking doing that lower paid job.
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Bring back Super Market Sweep and have Sweep present it. No translator no subtitles you just have to figure out what he’s squeaking
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Hear me out we bring back Top Gear but Sweep is the only presenter and he just drives his bone car around nice countrysides.
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This Nigel Slater post and caption is a bit too hot for my morning custard.
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Having long hair and a beard being absolutely ruined by these two.
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When you don’t trust your bathroom fitters to get on with the job.
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Just waiting at the vets and this guy’s just come in without a pet
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Craft beer is like normal beer but someone has to tell you a little story before you have it.
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If someone burgled Pieterson’s house whilst he advertised that he was out it would be the funniest thing to ever happen.
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Duck
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When you eat an egg in one then someone asks you if you've seen their egg
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When mum asks you to get the good mince.
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Leave and let’s lie.
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I’ve only gone and ordered a Sweep puppet. Mid life crisises are ace. Enjoy it
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Gregg Wallace has just been round to tell me he didn’t want more children. Strange as I hadn’t asked. He just told me that. Yes his boy was with him.
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David Tennant still hasn’t apologised for inspiring cool uncles to wear converse at weddings.
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When I paid to see the Elvis film yesterday they gave me two pieces of paper. One for the money, two for the show
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Fucking crying for this marvellous man finally having his time on the Eurovision stage for real
#Eurovision
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Regrets, I've had a few
But then again, tofu to mention
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Please check that she’s not in Walsall
In the great city of Warsaw speaking at The Future of Europe conference with
@Heritage
and
@FundacjaWEI
.
We cannot continue to appease people who want to undermine our way of life.
Read
@BreitbartNews
report👇
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What my bills see when I’m trying to see if it’s a Valentine’s day card.
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Can we have a round of applause for kettles please. Absolutely goated when boiling water whatever... The work horse of the kitchen. Boil after boil after boil and it just sits and asks for more. Love them.
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Damien Heinz haz gone becoming the 49th to resign. He should’ve waiting until he was the 57th. A lovely joke my parents would love.
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There now has been about 5 account made. Thank you twitter gods. You still are stirring. The first one I saw I RETWEETED
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Things are getting strange, I'm starting to worry
This could be a case for Margaux and Scully
#uc
#UniversityChallenge
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Not deleting the one about her being changed into a cat and they couldn’t change her back. That was good stuff.
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@SaulStaniforth
@colinbell
@paulpowlesland
Love it when intelligent people say what I want to say but in a clear, reasonable and polite way. Basically I’d get it wrong and probably get too passionate and then borderline offend.
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Lord Sugar is it? And you’re not a character on a cereal box? Seems unlikely.
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Pom-bears have been renamed Som-bears during this period of national mourning.
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Someone on threads pointed out the Greenland is icy and Iceland is green. So I’m back here.
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Where are they now
@Herring1967
@RealPaulPutner
?
Is it just me or does this orange look like the offender?
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Liz Truss walks like she’s not confident her upper body is going to go with her.
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What he says before taking another celeb into the afterlife.
The weather is just right for adventure and a long walk.
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@_rightfoulgit
I was waiting for the person who said excuse me to tell them to fuck off. Also volume control please.
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Matt Hancock missing the chance to joke “so you’re the one who bought it’’ when the inquiry showed him they had read his book. You just can’t trust people like him.
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Lying in bed with a coffee and a golden face mask like a royal.
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What my bills see when I’m trying to see if it’s a Valentine’s day card.
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I fucking hate the apprentice it’s fucking shit and they all should tell you to fuck off
I am a great admirer of the BBC show the repair shop. However I think they spend too much time on sob stories and not enough on watching the repair process.
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A picture of yourself and how far you are away from Dorking.
I am 147 miles away from Dorking
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Middle aged men on an all dayer.
Dave Bautista, Stellan Skarsgård and Austin Butler on the set of ‘DUNE: PART TWO’
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Put my custard in the slow cooker so I can wake up to a slow roasted piping hot mug of the old yellow.
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As you seem to like penguins a lot, this determined one is one I did for my Mum’s birthday
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Imagine if they accidentally turned her into a cat and now can’t turn her back.
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Can we all just be happy for British Gas. Managing to make such a profit during these challenging times.
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When you see the other guys waiting for the proctologist and wonder what’s wrong with their arseholes.
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