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@realemilyattack

Followers
4,997
Following
926
Media
5,819
Statuses
60,535

em's microblog. account monitored by em's chiweenie

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Joined January 2009
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@realemilyattack
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11 years
does it even matter if babies get switched at the hospital like who cares
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@realemilyattack
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4 years
I’m locked out of my dogs Facebook account that i created in 2010 and they won’t let me back in unless I send over a copy of his drivers license
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@realemilyattack
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2 years
Im so over fear mongering food takes but this one is really gonna send me over the edge!!! Shut up!!!!!
@nypost
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2 years
White rice is as bad as candy when it comes to heart health: study
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@realemilyattack
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3 years
this is a tough one..
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@realemilyattack
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1 month
i got an espresso martini at Chilis yesterday ..
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@realemilyattack
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4 years
I have no choice but to teach him how to drive
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@realemilyattack
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2 years
Very much the energy I bring into dating
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@realemilyattack
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2 years
This tik tok is so important to me
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@realemilyattack
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6 years
women: endure dozens of microaggressions per day, socialized to be polite, immersed in culture where being sexualized is tied up with self worth, live with real fear of violent retaliation ... dudes: why don’t u just say no a little louder lol it’s easy i luv being loud
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@realemilyattack
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4 years
does anyone else have imposter syndrome but for their mental illness? like i’m severely depressed but i often suspect i might be faking it
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@realemilyattack
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8 months
My dad said the Bigfoot sightings website he used to like has gone totally commercial "of course"
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@realemilyattack
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2 years
I need that stuff Juliet drank that made her seem dead for awhile
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@realemilyattack
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2 years
What if u met the love of your life and they were really into baseball
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@realemilyattack
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10 months
I think if you have a bad dream you should get the day off work
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@realemilyattack
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4 years
There’s an argument about Obama’s birth certificate happening under this tweet
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@realemilyattack
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12 years
boy if I could rearrange the alphabet I wouldn't because N is right next to O already
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@realemilyattack
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11 years
do my tattoos mean anything? yes, they mean I'm cool
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@realemilyattack
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2 years
@rhinotary This photo lmao. Godspeed traveler...
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@realemilyattack
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2 years
I love it in my burrow
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@realemilyattack
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1 year
Oh shit one of my non twitter internet pals did this lol
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@realemilyattack
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6 years
@notfolu i’m dying at the last one
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@realemilyattack
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10 years
men try so hard to make being rejected by women a Social Issue
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@realemilyattack
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4 years
my daily routine
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@realemilyattack
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11 years
*batman voice* I'm ovulating
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@realemilyattack
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4 years
ur rides here
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@realemilyattack
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3 years
3 helpful suggestions thank u google
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@realemilyattack
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4 years
start up founders are like yeah... we say 'fuck' in meetings here 😏 that's a benefit we offer in lieu of medical coverage
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@realemilyattack
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11 years
ah nothing brings a smile to my face quite like a man demanding it
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@realemilyattack
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8 months
There's a woman who keeps coming up on my tiktok feed showing her "5 to 9 after my 9 to 5" and she goes to Disney world every night
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@realemilyattack
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3 years
thoughts?
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@realemilyattack
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11 years
screenshot from my sex tape http://t.co/e68c1pY8
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@realemilyattack
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9 years
i mean buffy died and rose from the dead twice
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@realemilyattack
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12 years
in canada, breaking bad is about a chemistry teacher whose cancer gets treated
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@realemilyattack
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1 month
@rhinotary love a handcrafted cocktail
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@realemilyattack
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11 years
the jerk store called and they hurt my feelings
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@realemilyattack
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11 months
I'm . In tears
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@realemilyattack
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9 years
this is a total Jim Halpert face http://t.co/9ex6pE7WXr
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@realemilyattack
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11 years
oh yeah this is why life is beautiful http://t.co/tA4ht41TCG
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@realemilyattack
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3 years
i’m actually really enjoying my replies today lol
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@realemilyattack
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7 years
1977 called it wants its topic of discussion back
@JSTOR_Daily
JSTOR Daily
7 years
Can you be a feminist and wear lipstick at the same time?
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@realemilyattack
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4 years
FYI if this is a thing u experience and like me never knew if it was just u
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@realemilyattack
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5 years
i can’t even tell u how awkward it is to take pics after getting engaged. lmao great shots of the ring here
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@realemilyattack
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4 years
day in the life of a CEO and billionaire
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@realemilyattack
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3 years
IM SCREAMING
@LikeAndBlock
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We are doomed as a country if it is this easy to cripple our infrastructure
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@realemilyattack
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1 month
@nicebigdog it's a collab with some vanderpump rules cast members lmfao
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@realemilyattack
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9 months
Grief should actually be linear ??
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@realemilyattack
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3 years
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@realemilyattack
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3 years
@robofuryman @delmeowster124 you’re missing the jokes friend
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@realemilyattack
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9 years
what i like about dogs is how they are not obsessed with climbing the corporate ladder and getting promoted
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@realemilyattack
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2 years
Sometimes when I compliment my dogs I add "everyone's saying so!" If it ever comes up in conversation w them please just go with it..
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@realemilyattack
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3 years
@Dchandler50 don’t die around around dillon ✍🏻
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@realemilyattack
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12 years
I’m watching my carbs. I’m watching them go in my mouth. I’m watching my gummy bears too
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@realemilyattack
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11 years
don't talk to me before I've had my coffee *never has coffee*
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@realemilyattack
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4 years
My experience visiting the Capitol Hill Autonomous Zone
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@realemilyattack
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12 years
Wow some of you are really into "sex"Well I did some research and I don't think it's practical or wise.
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@realemilyattack
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11 years
I'm never getting married all men are just cheaters who fake their own death and frame their wives for murder
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@realemilyattack
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12 years
ONE STEP CLOSER TO THE HEDGE AND IM ABOUT TO RAKE
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@realemilyattack
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3 years
i feel u brother
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@realemilyattack
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2 years
Almost quote tweeted something and then I remembered my most sacred responsibility
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@realemilyattack
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1 month
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@realemilyattack
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3 years
dudes? rock
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@realemilyattack
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3 years
wait.. what?
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@realemilyattack
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1 year
This is how I'll be spending the holiday weekend
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@realemilyattack
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2 years
Stopped relating to this one real quick lmbo
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@realemilyattack
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10 years
ay some dude pressed his dick up on me at DJ spinn so I farted
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@realemilyattack
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10 years
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@realemilyattack
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12 years
i made popcorn on the stove like our ancestors
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@realemilyattack
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9 months
Max reached the end of his road this morning. I am so lucky I have to had 14 good years with my heart dog, the world's most gentle but tough, pure hearted sweet angel
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@realemilyattack
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10 years
women dont want to explain feminism to u bc we're tired.
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@realemilyattack
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1 year
Unfortunately I just heard the phrase "platonic polyamory" and I now have to pass away goodbye
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@realemilyattack
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2 years
I should be allowed to tweet a pic of my boobs without it being a whole thing
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@realemilyattack
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4 years
look at his eyes. he’s lost in the sauce at this point
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@realemilyattack
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6 years
“i like to stay informed” -my reply to reggie teasing me for obsessively checking @IvePetThatDog
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@realemilyattack
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1 year
My 3 year old just looked at me and said "mom, given the air pressure at those depths it is most likely the submersible imploded"
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@realemilyattack
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3 years
fun fact: the 1970s will always be 30 years ago
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@realemilyattack
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2 years
I would stick beside them. At least I can have a cold one and a hot dog at the game
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@realemilyattack
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2 years
I've now been called rupert Murdoch because of this tweet where do I collect my check
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@realemilyattack
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5 years
i did all of these things - every single one - for years. within a month of taking my *mental illness drug* i had my life back. if i hadn’t waited so long (in part due to this kind of irresponsible platitude) i wouldn’t have had to struggle for literal decades
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@realemilyattack
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12 years
Age is just a number, blood pressure is just a number, blood alcohol content is just a number, IQ is just a number, sell by date is just a n
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@realemilyattack
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11 years
To write pen15 on her arms
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@realemilyattack
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9 years
I hope u die at the gym 👼 http://t.co/oU7R7ElWoZ
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@realemilyattack
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3 months
i really enjoyed this tik tok
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@realemilyattack
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3 years
@mabluil im not straight but no
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@realemilyattack
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3 years
tomorrow my angel max has surgery to have a tumor removed 1 like = 1 healing
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@realemilyattack
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6 years
the future is emale
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@realemilyattack
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9 years
loving on other women helps my own self esteem life hack
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@realemilyattack
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3 years
this is where i’m at if anyone is wondering
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@realemilyattack
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5 years
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@realemilyattack
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10 years
"Is Beyonce Really A Feminist?" and other fart noises that oddly resemble a sentence
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@realemilyattack
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3 years
announcement: i am now 34
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10 years
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@realemilyattack
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12 years
Dog showing off his bone like he hot shit. Get a job idiott
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4 years
i don’t like to body shame but tbh i always thought owls could move their heads 360 degrees, come to find out it’s a mere 270
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@realemilyattack
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5 years
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@realemilyattack
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10 years
ummmm it's not drinking alone I have like 4000 followers
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@realemilyattack
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2 years
Do u think there's something I can buy @that will make me truly happy. Maybe in the $25 to $30 range
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@realemilyattack
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6 years
i’m dog sitting which means im saying “mind your own business fellas” every ten minutes
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@realemilyattack
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4 years
Well, yes
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@realemilyattack
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10 years
my friends 16-year-old brothers friends wrote "bareback king" all over his parents minivan after he lost his virginity without a condom
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@realemilyattack
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9 years
if you don't fav my selfies then that's fine. that's just a choice you've made in your life . but we all have to answer to God
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