Ryan Nanni
@celebrityhottub
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do you think he knows he wrote a haiku
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Kawhi's just gonna announce by updating his LinkedIn profile, isn't he?
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you know how we all go to Home Depot every weekday for 8 hours?
DeSantis: "If you can do Home Depot, if you can do Walmart, you can definitely do the schools."
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good on Brett Favre for not protesting (checks notes) his dad’s ghost?
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took a meeting with the orcas. we're so screwed.
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Taco Bell should have a Randomizer option where you give them $5 and they just give you a bag of whatever they feel is worth that.
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"Michigan State put more Hitlers on the scoreboard than points" is quite the rivalry wikipedia entry
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if Doug Pederson wins a ring in Philly and Jacksonville he is the greatest coach in football history at any level
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this is the shit they put on the video board when the 2009 Panthers get a third down stop
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SERVER: Would you like to hear about our specials?
KYRIE IRVING: [arching one eyebrow] And these dishes are special according to whom?
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This Father's Day, it is time again to review the most Dad thing you've done in the last year. Here is mine:
Whether or not I need it, want it, or will use it, I simply have to put every sauce that comes with a food delivery in the fridge "because you never know."
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Today, I ask you for the most Dad things you've done in the last year. (You need not be a dad or have kids.) I'll go first:
1. For my birthday, I only asked for a pressure washer.
2. At the store, I said, out loud to myself, that there are "too many dang potato chip flavors."
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PUBLISH THE POWERPOINT, AARON
Aaron Rodgers just said he presented his research to the NFL. "They thought I was a quack."
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donald trump lost all the states with NFL bird mascots (PA, GA, AZ, MD, WA), birds forever
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I think what appeals to me about the Philly sports experience is that it's less "wow this is the best assembly of talent and coaching," but instead much more "wow those rowdy guys just hopped the fence and found a bulldozer with the keys in it"
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"UGH that sounds like a lot of work" is actually a very relatable reason to bail on a job
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important reminder: bowl game results are largely meaningless unless they provide ammunition for your hatin' agenda
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It's Father's Day, so it is time once again for each of us, regardless of gender or whether we have children, to review the Most Dad Thing we've done in the last year.
Here is mine: I text my wife photos of awful parking jobs. This is my favorite.
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Look, it's that stretch of Bills Super Bowl appearances!
Four nor'easters in three weeks: it isn't unprecedented and it hasn't been that long since the last time it happened. Via
@wxjerdman
and
@chrisdolcewx
:
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I feel certain in my heart that Russell Wilson has been using a terrible English accent from the second the Broncos landed in London.
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lions had a butt catch, a penalty they declined that would have given them a first down, a hook and ladder, and a successful 4th down attempt in field goal range. all on the last drive.
fucking awesome.
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if you're annoyed that the Sugar Bowl is running so late, try this lifehack: just be tired every day all the time so you don't really notice things like this
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i know Tommy Tuberville Knows Nothing About How Our Government Works is funny but it’s also deeply fucking embarrassing
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very pumped for Brian Kelly to start calling it The War of Northern Aggression
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wait you’re saying Donald Trump showed up and now Bama’s got a huge deficit problem
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If I scored 5 touchdowns to beat Bama for the first time in forever I would never shut up about it. I would start a hotel called the 5 Touchdowns Inn, make my daughter, Cinque, the manager, and tell her to give every guest five keys to their room.
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how you gonna be PM for less time than Nathaniel Hackett is head coach of the broncos
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the proper way to judge baseball food is "how funny would it be if a foul ball hit this item and it exploded all over the person holding it"
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Miami Dolphins announce they are ending Super Bowl campaign
Breaking: Bill de Blasio announces he is ending his presidential campaign
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Establishing the run against covid so we can beat it with play action in the third quarter
Trump's doctor says he didn't admit yesterday that Trump was put on oxygen because he was trying to be publicly upbeat. "I didn't want to give any information that might steer the illness in another direction."
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should have sent to the University of Georgia if you wanted to keep it from becoming airborne
BREAKING NEWS: The University of Pittsburgh announces they will obtain samples of the Coronavirus and work to develop a vaccine.
@KDKA
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When you were supposed to see the doctor half an hour ago
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this is chester cheetah's cousin, lord john jaguar
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wait til he learns how martin luther king felt
Aaron Rodgers reportedly ‘very unhappy with the response’ to vaccine interview
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let’s
fuck
at
the
baseball
game
Rays reducing seating capacity at Tropicana Field to create more 'intimate' experience
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why do so many LIV videos look like the thing that's on autoplay when you turn on a hotel room tv
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Sometimes Dabo reacts to things Clemson does as if he had zero influence on them
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Yup, got laid off today. Gonna miss working with all the talented folks at
@secretbase
but I know they'll keep kicking ass.
Not sure what's next! But if you wanna chat about something, email me at ryan.nanni
@gmail
.com
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this is a load screen in an Assassin's Creed game
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I think college athletes should have to pay for the right to play, and that money should go to the fans who are the lifeblood of the program are they not???????
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dude looks like an NBA GM who's ready to make some duuuuumb trades
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Welcome to the jungle
We've got fun and games
We've got thirty feral hogs
Or fifty, in that range
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it's unfair to count Nashville's Bachelorette Parties That Didn't Know The Draft Was Happening in this
NFL Draft Attendance:
2015, Chicago: 200,000
2016, Chicago: 225,000
2017, Philadelphia: 250,000
2018, Dallas: 200,000
2019, Nashville: 600,000
2020: Virtual
2021, Cleveland: 160,000
2022, Las Vegas: 300,000
2023, Kansas City: 312,000
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PHILADELPHIA: We’re gonna spend the first half playing some songs from our new album
CROWD: (boos lustily)
PHILADELPHIA: ok fine here’s Philly Special
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this was either version 1 of the graphic or version 58, no in between
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that was like watching two intoxicated bears play chess
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Jordan-Hare stadium bends light and time in ways that our scientists cannot fully grasp
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As we do every Father's Day, it is time for us to share the most Dad thing you did this year. (Being a father is not a requirement to participate.)
I will go first: I developed extensive opinions about dried fruit options.
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If you aren't rooting for the Browns to go 0-0-16 we will never be friends
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buddy we saw the ohio state game, competitive balance left somewhere in the middle of the first quarter
Nebraska coach Scott Frost on the passage of SB 206 in California: “I hope it doesn’t destroy opportunities and competitive balance” in college athletics.
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Sad to see we’re losing one of the SEC’s most cherished rivalries, Ole Miss vs. Non Conference Power 5 Team You Forgot Ole Miss Scheduled And Yup They Just Beat Ole Miss
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Operates the world's first Crossfit funeral home
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everything about this Temu ad feels like an iPhone game where your credit card number gets stolen
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We’ve now had 17 CFB Playoff games, and:
- Bama's won 6
- Clemson's won 6
- The rest of college football's won 5
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the patriots could draft a nintendo 64 with no power cord and everyone would be all “AW DAMN BELICHICK SWINDLED EVERYONE AGAIN"
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the Big 12 trophy looks like it costs $8,000 from SkyMall
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SECRET
007
LLC
YOUR BOY IS ONE THOUSAND PERCENT BUYING A SUBMARINE
NEW: 20-year-old Florida man claims Mega Millions jackpot, choosing to receive one-time, lump-sum payment of $281,874,999.00.
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at this point i have to assume Kevin McCarthy has a ton of "SPEAKER MCCARTHY" merch sitting in a warehouse he's desperate to move
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i'm gonna be honest, i would love to see NFL media have to deal with one season of who makes the playoffs being decided by committee
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This is the Arizona State logo upside down.
I copied Bill Wennington’s post moves in high school and now I will copy his look.
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this is 100% the car you draw when you’re not paying attention in social studies
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see I would have changed the name
Bishop Sycamore is scheduled to play a football game next month
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i remain bitterly disappointed that they’re called the Longhorn Band and not Texas Instruments
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i wish we could revive James Naismith and put him courtside at an NBA Finals game to let us all watch him freak the fuck out
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aggressive recency bias playoff:
1. Michigan
2. South Carolina
3. Utah
4. New Mexico State
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Dear Whoever Is In Charge of Sports Terms: We need a phrase for “a perfect game that’s just strikeouts” because that’s what North Texas pitcher Hope Trautwein did this weekend.
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The near future: one loss Notre Dame argues undefeated BYU doesn't deserve a playoff slot because they didn't play a conference title game
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that’s ben mcadoo
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"Penn State lost by one score to Ohio State" is mathematically true but emotionally false
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that or the 2-11 record
Urban Meyer thinks he failed in Jacksonville because "everything is so fragile now," including football players and coaching staffs.
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The 1972 Dolphins are engaged in what is arguably the longest act of hating in modern times
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Andy Reid and Coach O are champions, 2020 is where big rowdy boys THRIVE
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You can get $200,000 a day for life IF you agree to eat one (1) waffle every morning. Do you do it???
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On January 21, 2018, the NFL and its corrupt officials denied us the Eagles-Jaguars Super Bowl we deserved.
But: what if they merely delayed it?
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(a voice that sounds suspiciously like Brian Kelly attempting a French accent) I have heard zat Brian Kelly might be VEREEE EENTERESTED in zees Alabama opportunité
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The transfer portal is really telling you which college football players are into graphic design.
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I mean until they say he definitely isn't we have to assume OJ Simpson is welcome at the Heisman house
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absolutely not cannot do a commercial suggesting the channel has been changed. fraud of the highest order.
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urban meyer has now lost as many games in one season with the jags as he did in nine combined seasons at ohio state and utah
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Scientists at Stanford University have constructed this 3D model of what John the Baptist might have looked like
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I choose to believe he's just saying this to infuriate Bosa, which I respect
Doug Pederson says he probably would not have gone for the late two point conversion had it not been for the penalty.
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genuinely appreciate how little time CBS takes naming its prime time dramas. they're all like POLICE INVESTIGATION: POLICE TIME or THE DOCTOR
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just for tomorrow, the Big Ten should let Jim Harbaugh on the sideline but locked in a soundproof booth
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too many taco bell commercials suggest that you're taking the food somewhere else and not eating it in the car
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if Urban Meyer's response is "I'm too tired and sad to be horny" honestly I think that could work
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2015: Clemson doesn’t play Pitt, loses to Alabama
2016: Clemson does fierce, noble battle with Pitt, beats Alabama
2017: Clemson avoids playing Pitt, loses to Alabama
2018: Clemson meets Pitt in ACC Championship Combat and well yeah
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personally I think it'd be funniest if we all posted exactly the same way but on LinkedIn
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if willy wonka ran an investment bank
New:
#LSU
head coach Brian Kelly is now tasked with hiring 10 on-field coaches.
With the Early Signing Period in 14 days, Kelly knows the clock is ticking.
"We have to work with a sense of urgency".
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