ex-Dylan Dodds (2012 - 2024)
@TornToRibbons
Followers
694
Following
20K
Media
804
Statuses
10K
Comedian Dylan Dodds, comparing my life to the sitcom Friends™ for 10 years. Now only on Instagram: @realdylandodds
London, more or less
Joined November 2012
Unwilling to partake in anything which gives money to someone openly making Nazi gestures at the inauguration of a world leader with a raft of nationalist and extreme anti-immigration policies. Follow on insta for updates/jokes @realdylandodds. #Musk (Moustache added for effect)
0
0
0
This is a very good show!.
Great news! If you're in the UK, you can now stream my @nextupcomedy stand up special NEVERMORE for free on the @ITVX player. Watch a full show from the comedian people on the internet are calling "Merida dressed as Shrek".
0
0
1
French woman: so I got scammed by a guy who I thought was Brad Pitt the whole time but turned out they didn't exist. Edward Norton: . .
2
1
6
RT @fesshole: My girlfriend wanted to try femdom, so we did. Wearing high heels, she kicked me so hard in the bollocks that they swelled up….
0
140
0
RT @MartinPilgrim1: It's strange that we say time is a great healer when it kills 100% of people.
0
16
0
The mad thing about HBO adapting Harry Potter at this point in time. Is that the actor now best suited to playing Dumbledore. is Ralph Fiennes.
1
0
1
RT @stephens_ben: Can we please give 2007 George Saunders credit for perfectly predicting and describing* where Twitter would end up, and t….
0
26
0
"which 3 US presidents were the same age?" is also a great pub quiz question.
0
0
0
Astonishing that the two oldest surviving presidents are now the two most recent ones #JimmyCarter
1
0
0
What If. Marvel thought about the ramifications of Tony Stark's parents surviving rather than doing 30 minutes of crap Russia jokes.
0
0
1
RT @Norfolkinidea: I wasn't going to tell you that I almost broke the world record for living in a storage box but I couldn't contain mysel….
0
1
0
RT @hdwmovies: so it's safe to assume that Matt Damon is playing Mario and Tom Holland is playing Cappy. I just wonder how Nolan is gonna d….
0
1K
0
Blown my mind discovering Matt Berry and Richard Ayoade made a Jesus Christ Superstar spoof feat Julia Davis, the Mighty Boosh, Matt Lucas and (now slightly embarrassingly) Graham Linehan and Laurence Fox.
0
0
0
YES. YES. YES.
After much speculation, Universal has confirmed Christopher Nolan's next movie will be #TheOdyssey, an IMAX primed adaptation of Homer's mythic Greek epic poem. Read more:
0
0
0
Ever wondered which Friends character swears the most? Read on to find out!. #WinterWonderland #Christmas #Swingers #Adoption #Charity #PaulRudd.
0
0
0
Sometimes you have a great gig. And sometimes you get heckled by a dog next to a swimming pool after one joke. #MerryChristmas #HappyNewYear #Comedy #Standup #Funny #whimsy #silly #animalpuns
0
0
0
RT @zoebread: just walked into the bathroom to put some washing in the washing basket and i mindlessly chucked it all into the toilet.
0
5
0