The shortest sad story in the world، punch

Constitution Hill 🤩 Wow! What a beast 🐎

Channel 4, I would like to formally request a 90 minute special of 24 Hours in Police Custody on the arrest of ex-Prince Andrew. Full timeline. Bodycam. Interview room. No sympathetic lighting. (@Channel4) #PrinceAndrew

Was in A&E this week and can't stop thinking about the person who kept telling me this was a kebab

The media never talks about how Zverev is doing this as a diabetic. Such a brilliant role model for children with medical issues

This Alcaraz v Zverev SF is a joke 🔥 #AustralianOpen2026

Respect the 🐐

A man died of hunger, but food was served at his funeral. When you're less busy, think about it.

If you need pliers to get a haircut, you may want to consider weight loss:

Five whole months of being OBSESSED over you 💙

Pizza costing £25.99.

A little tip to know for the next time you receive a telemarketing call.

In my career as a lumberjack, I cut down exactly 82,546 trees. I know that, because I kept a log.

Please sell Paqueta for £40m @WestHam I beg you! Take that and reinvest in the defence!! 🙏 😩 #WHUFC #Paqueta

Went for a job interview at EVRI. I said, "Sorry I'm late, I went to the wrong address.” They made me Regional manager. 😃

Saturdays and for football and daddy ⚽️

I say it again, I find it incredible that an object this size can lift into the air with such apparent ease (footage at Sydney) https://t.co/GbhqJ7sGWS

He can’t have many complaints tbh 🤣

Class

And to the correct authorities because that was dangerous!! Greedy club stealing people’s money! Scandalous!