Jasmine Keith
@Jasmine_Keith1
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Following
1,678
Media
2,246
Statuses
24,506
43 year old mom of boys. Identifies as gen x. Fluent in sarcasm. Enthusiastic about wine. I make a lot of typos.
Washington, USA
Joined July 2011
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Pinned Tweet
I had the amazing opportunity to hear why
@TulsiGabbard
supports
@joekent16jan19
Two incredible people that love this nation! I couldn’t be more proud to stand behind Joe 🇺🇸
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It’s systematically oppressive to ask adult gay men not to have 57 sexual partners a week, but it’s our communal responsibility to mask 5 year olds and deny speech therapy to them for 2+ years. Did I get that right?
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As a pro choice mother…I’ll be voting against every person that locked us down, closed schools, forced vaccines, and masked my kids. If bodily autonomy was so important to you, you probably should behaved accordingly the last 2.5 years
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Hey. If you don’t like the mask mandate being lifted for travel, just get your own airline. Easy 🤷🏻♀️
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@sarahbeth345
@ericareport
Tbf…I doubt Erica actually knew that Armenians existed 30 seconds before writing that tweet and she’s still not entirely sure who they are or where they are from
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Breaking! Boomers everywhere will be canceling their Spotify accounts just as soon as someone is available to help them!
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In case some of you didn’t know…my 5 year old still can’t get unmasked speech therapy bc of Jay Inslee’s mask mandate. Tomorrow is June 1st, 2022. When the hell does this end?
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Jay Inslee just lifted our WA state outdoor mask mandate. I literally had no idea that we had that in place 😂🙄
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Friends, I’ve made the tough choice to stand in solidarity with the good residents of Martha’s Vineyard. After all they’ve endured these past 36 hours, I wear a Vineyard Vines sweater to honor their sacrifice. Please
#DoYourPart
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Moms across this country are done with our elected officials messing with our kids. Our children are masked 7+ hours a day. They’re suffering headaches, engagement loss, prepubescent acne and staph infections on their tiny faces. We have depression soaring in a demographic 1/
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@Victorshi2020
Literally nobody with a walker is offended by this. Stop manufacturing outrage and look within your soul and ask “why does this make me so angry?” Because really, it shouldn’t.
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@PeterHotez
@UniofOxford
Then why did all our elected officials just go on a mass tweet campaign claiming it was gun violence? Didn’t y’all get the same memo to tweet out?
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@LokayFOX5
That’s a real bummer…where ever will I get my redundant, misleading headlines and sound bites?
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@libsoftiktok
This person sounds like they aren’t in the right head space to be responsible for the educational and emotional development for a classroom of students. “…releasing past trauma & relearning…” sounds like a great time to take a sabbatical and work on one’s self
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The “off label ivermectin is dangerous but Ozempic helped me lose 80lbs” crowd is an interesting bunch
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I’m fucking over throwing biological women in a corner to make room for the dudes cosplaying out their fantasies
#WeAreWomen
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Does my cloth mask protect me from nuclear fallout? Asking for a friend…
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Look…If I can share a Twitterverse with JoJo and Brooklyn Dad y’all can deal with Trump. Block or mute and grown up
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@lporiginalg
Some of us aren’t even playing nice. We prefer the “honesty is the best policy” approach
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@JordanSchachtel
Imagine the emotional impact on his co workers. Who are you today? What do we call you? What a terrible environment
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@ClayTravis
@SchnauzerMom40
So the head of marketing thought it was a good idea to strip the product of its entire identity and cater to a group that has never and will never drink it? Smart…
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@TheDailyPretzel
@nypost
But you could see why they can’t figure it out, right? How many have read a book? 😂
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@TuckerCarlson
I don’t know what’s better…having Tucker on Twitter or watching the meltdowns because Tucker is on Twitter. Either way 🔥🔥
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PSA for all the ladies: always trust your gut and be particularly vigilant when you back into a parking spot. Here’s my story…
I had the most bizarre experience at my Walmart grocery pickup last week.
I backed into a spot and was helping the employee load my groceries into the
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@VP
Remember when I didn’t want to inject some random mystery substance with no long term data into my body? Or wear a mask covering my face? Remember how you didn’t trust me to make those decisions? Wild
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@jk_rowling
Hello fellow non-men! I’m pleased that we were generous enough to give up our title as “women” to make penis owning non-men feel more included in things like lesbian relationships and non-men locker rooms. Progress is beautiful 🫶🏻
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@ericareport
There’s no back pedaling this one. It was so poorly written nobody needed to “manipulate” what you said. You spoke from the heart and your own words said it all
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@Timcast
“The decision all but guarantees further attacks on LGBTQ people and culture”
Dramatic much? It’s a coffee shop that’s taking down some disposable party decorations
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@SaraGonzalesTX
This is strictly for social street cred from their progressive inner circles. Sacrificing their kids so they can get props
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Ladies, I don’t care how “natural” everyone told you your lip injections are, they’re not and they look terrible. Please let this trend die
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@libsoftiktok
@elonmusk
This poor girl is going to have a helluva time finding a new job after she’s fired
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I woke up to a chilly 25° this morning. I took a scalding hot shower heated by my on demand gas water heater. Then flipped the switch to the gas fireplace while I fried an egg on my gas stove.
We have elected the dumbest people in this state that just passed to take this away
Just after 2am the majority of
@washdems
passed House Bill 1589 that will lead to the banning of natural gas, forcing residents to pay exorbitant costs to convert to electricity, even after their own special interest groups said it will have a negative affect on the poor
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Imagine being this mother and being so confident in these actions, you admit them on Twitter. There are 2 distinct realities right now and this one is not mine.
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@BillboardChris
@unheardparent
Tell me you’re not a mother without telling me you’re not a mother
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@mmpadellan
Dear women,
Clown paid to manipulate you into voting for his buyers doesn’t care about you.
This is NOT a joke.
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@libsoftiktok
My brain right now:
If you don’t have anything nice to say
If you don’t have anything nice to say
If you don’t have anything nice to say
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@SusanInDelaware
@RepSwalwell
Good god woman…get a grip. We don’t lock up people just because we don’t like them.
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@POTUS
Let’s be honest…you didn’t make that and couldn’t even follow it if you tried. But also…you didnt tweet this so I’m not sure why I bother 🤷🏻♀️
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But here we are. We are willing to lose friends, family, careers…we will stop at nothing to take back what has been stolen from our children. This movement will grow far beyond anything this world has ever seen. 3/3
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When did we normalize leaving the house in actual pajamas and slippers? And how do we undo that?
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@libsoftiktok
I honestly wouldn’t even know how to gender this person. Is it a boy trying to look like a butch girl? Or a girl trying to look like a feminine boy? Do is a favor and wear a name tag
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I just want my kids and I to live as free as an elected official at a playoff game. Is that too much to ask?
#UnmaskUs
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I never want to hear another Democrat lecture me on bodily autonomy
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Congratulations if these little non gendered freaks are your kids. Or all the other privileged little shits marching in the streets and across college campuses. You epically failed as a parent. You contributed to the downfall of our society. You made the world MY kids have to
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@tomselliott
@PressSec
“Trans youth.” “Trans youth.” How many trans kids are they manufacturing?
We’d actually just like the kids to be left alone and not have the left’s perverse agenda shoved down their throats at every turn.
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My 5 & 7 year olds don’t need childless activists telling them what their sexual preferences are. Period. Ever. Just leave the damn kids alone and let them be kids while they can.
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@HarmfulOpinion
This sounds like an argument from a 5 year old. “Why can’t we rob the rich to pay for the poor? I saw this idea in Robin Hood once!”
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@libsoftiktok
@Homer33c
This person shouldn’t work anywhere near children, the elderly, or animals. I don’t know what options that leaves him and frankly, I don’t care.
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@mehdirhasan
“I can’t believe anything the people I don’t like believe and it’s their fault I couldn’t believe it even though it was true”
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That should be living their best carefree lives. We are moms from every different background, but the one thing we have in common is that we are mothers above all else. Some of us never imagined bringing this much attention to ourselves. Never thought we could speak out 2/
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@Travis_in_Flint
Good luck with that future drug problem, Virginia. Maybe y’all should have visited Seattle, Portland or San Francisco first
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I’m pro choice for early and rare circ. As I scroll Twitter I read, over and over, “we’re being stripped of our basic fundamental rights”. I can’t help but wonder how the people shouting this expect us to take them seriously after what they’ve forced on us for the last 2 years.
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@RaheemKassam
As our commander in chief is reading “end of quote” “repeat line” off the teleprompter, we have this representing our nation…what happened to us?
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@libsoftiktok
This person wouldn’t be my child’s teacher. My child wouldn’t even attend a school that gave this person a job mopping the floors let alone allow them to teach
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@POTUS
If you have 6 apples and I take 6 away but give 6 back…LOOK I gave you 6 apples! 🫶🏻
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@wilderpatriot
I’m a straight, married woman and not even I could focus on what she was saying
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@CasuallyGreg
Remember when we didn’t publicly share every intimate detail of our lives to the world? Those were good times…
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@RaheemKassam
It’s absolutely ridiculous! My ballot was turned in 2 days ago and has yet to be counted. It’s 2022…there’s no reason for this
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3 years ago. Usually my FB memories spark emotions of fondness longing for a time I’ll never get back. When I see this image I should feel all those feels…but I don’t. It takes me back to a time of loneliness, isolation, and anxiety. Trapped in my house with 2 busy boys. No
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@AlyssaRosenberg
@anya1anya
I’m only interested so those that were wrong can be mercilessly mocked and ridiculed, similar to what they did to me, when I was right. And so they remember to never do this again
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@kylenabecker
It’ll be even better if these accounts, that I don’t follow, stop appearing in my feed constantly 🤞🏼
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@libsoftiktok
@friscoisd
“Please do not expose the child to this filth that we allow children to be exposed to by making it readily available”
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@PicturesFoIder
Good for her!! 👏🏼👏🏼
Where’s the gofundme to send this lady on a much needed tropical vacation?!
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@CasuallyGreg
It’s okay. Her $250,000 Equity and Inclusion degree wasn’t going to take her far anyway
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It took a minute but now I recognize that guy! We loved him in Sing!
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We were recently out with another couple…the husband misquoted something about a bill WA State had passed this year. I let him finish and politely corrected the mistake. He looked me straight in the face and asked “don’t you think as a wife and mother you’d be much happier if
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@robbystarbuck
“I knew my fetus was gender neutral while it was in the womb”.
No sane woman says this 😂
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The pandemic is over. Tell your friends. It’s time we ended these endless emergency orders and gave the people their daily lives back. Our west coast states have had 2 years to figure it out and they’ve squandered it. We’re done. All done.
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WA and OR…this is how it’s done. We simply will not comply when they try this shit again.
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@TPostMillennial
“Hey friends! I think we made a bad, let’s just pretend this never happened. I think we’re better than that. Heart you all!” -Karina Gould
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