@trussliz Somewhere, in an alternate timeline: "Lettuce, after a successful tenure as prime minister you somehow managed to bring about financial stability to the entire UK. How did you manage such a thing?" *mysterious lettuce silence* "That's so lettuce"

EXCL: Ministers want to secure youth mobility scheme with EU by end of 2026, with UK officials pushing for two-year time limit and cap in “tens of thousands” @elenicourea reports. Govt source said that if up and running by 2027, the first tranche of Europeans arriving in UK

@SuellaBraverman

🚨Some personal news. I've just filed my first copy for The New Yorker. Jonathan Gullis - The Seagull's Lament. https://t.co/Z8tn1cRMUm

BREAKING: In its best scene yet, South Park just humiliated Pete Hegseth. This is amazing.

This is seismic. When the Telegraph - the house paper of Brexit - publishes a 2,000-word obituary admitting: 📉 Brexit has cut UK GDP by up to 8% 📉 Investment down 18% 📉 Productivity down 4% 📉 Employment down 4% 📉 No trade benefits 📉 No regulatory freedom 📉 No immigration

Nish Kumar, "I think Shabana Mahmood's plan is insane" #HIGNFY "All we ever talk about in this country is immigration" "Meanwhile we have people paying too much on bills, a climate crisis, I think we now have to reframe everything through the prism of immigration" "Three of

In the same week the Covid Inquiry concluded that introducing lockdown a week earlier could have saved 23,000 lives and a former Reform politician was jailed for accepting Russian bribes, #bbclaurak hasn’t expended a single second talking about it That is fucking astonishing

😡 Brexiteer Tim Martin spent years telling Britain that Brexit would “boost democracy and prosperity”. Today? Wetherspoons is routing its entire EU expansion through Ireland to avoid the Brexit red tape *HE* helped create. The loudest Brexiteer in hospitality now needs the EU

Bruno is a savage 😂

@pritipatel You were outed as going on a foreign visit without permission from the government. Memory serves you had to resign. I think you’re the one who hates Britain, not the PM. A former minister complicit in the corruption of the VIP Lane debacle if only by your silence. A disgrace.

🚨 SUMMARY: Key findings from Phase 2 of the Covid-19 inquiry - Government did "too little, too late", leading to thousands more deaths - Lockdown left lasting scars on society and worsened existing inequalities - If lockdown had been imposed a week earlier than March 16, it

In tonight’s incredibly sane Mail on Sunday they have six pages on the BBC, three separate, unrelated attacks plus the front page. They side with Trump against the BRITISH Broadcasting Corporation. This is just one edition. One paper One example. But it suggests a national

EXCLUSIVE: RedBird Capital Partners has withdrawn its £500m bid for Telegraph Media Group, publisher of the Daily and Sunday Telegraph, throwing the newspapers’ future into renewed doubt. Full exclusive story on @skynews shortly.

@ShippersUnbound Leading in the polls…! Labour were leading in the polls for much of the previous Tory government but that didn’t stop the right wing being platformed more often.

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How did those presenters keep a straight face

Watch to the end 👀

Some very important information about two very important men. ⁦@themarkrad⁩ ⁦@jasemonkey⁩ ⁦@PhilWilliams⁩ 💥