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Woods Profile
Woods

@thestevenwoods

Followers
29K
Following
391K
Media
8K
Statuses
102K

Married to @hannahnancarrow. Beau and Taylor’s Dad. Host: @benandwoods + Glass banger for @sealslax “San Diego’s Concierge”

Joined March 2012
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
@thestevenwoods
Woods
7 months
A story about a seemingly clean cut guy living a twisted double life? Very curious 🤔.
@MLBONFOX
FOX Sports: MLB
7 months
Ohtani's top show he is watching right now? @BreakingBad. Respect 🧪. @BryanCranston | @KevinBurkhardt
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
7 years
@TomiLahren You mean like the host of the Apprentice?.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
11 months
If only he played in a giant fucking market that could vote him in 🤔.
@BlakeHHarris
Blake Harris
11 months
Will Smith has the highest fWAR among all catchers in baseball . But there are those out there who will try and tell you he sucks bc a lot of people dont know ball and didn't vote for him to be an All-Star 🤷🏻‍♂️ .
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
7 months
FUCKKKKKK YEAHHHHHH. Gonna grab a Dave Roberts on my way out!!!!
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
4 years
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
7 years
@sbosarge73 @FoxNewsInsider @foxandfriends @Sethrogen Celebrities like our esteemed President?.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
2 years
@CalebJHull Both of my kids (5) and (2) absolutely love Bowie, Kiss, T-Rex, etc. How is it that they understand art and you, a grown man, does not?.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
2 years
@charliekirk11 Fucking ghoul.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
7 days
The fact that he completely butchered the timing and still put it in the street. what a freak.
@Letters2AJ
Letters To AJ
8 days
Mid-stance adjustment
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
8 months
Never in my wildest dreams did I envision this for this season.
@MLB
MLB
8 months
The @Padres finish off the sweep and are 20 games above .500 for the first time since 2010.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
2 years
@notcapnamerica He couldn’t define CRT if you had a gun to his head.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
JOE HIT EM WITH IT
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
Worst 111 win team I’ve ever seen, tbh.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
8 months
I’ve never bought a jersey before, but after the unsettling and intentional attacks by Dave Roberts and the national media, that all changed today. #LFGSD 💛🤎💛 🤟🏼🪳
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
4 months
Fully convinced the national baseball writers are on a group text where they’re trying to outdo each other to see who can shovel the most shit about this. “Watch this…I’m gonna shoehorn Jackie Robinson in the mix for my next tweet”
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
IM SO FUCKING HAPPY FOR OUR CITY.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
8 years
@cramersmail1 @VicBergerIV @realDonaldTrump like a birth certificate?.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
7 months
Plus the assassination attempt by Manny Machado.
@BNightengale
Bob Nightengale
7 months
Dave Roberts says this has been his most challenging season since becoming Dodgers manager with their rash of injuries.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
@jakeshieldsajj Who the fuck did you think the machine was?.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
1 year
ESPN crew heading over to dodger stadium for tonight’s big game!
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
2 years
Tonight looks like the battle of the IT departments
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
7 months
Not everything Manny does is controversial. I'm begging dodger fans to learn baseball. Begging.
@latimes
Los Angeles Times
7 months
Freddie Freeman on Manny Machado's controversial base running in NLDS Game 3.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
4 years
Guys named Aubrey?.
@aubrey_huff
Aubrey Huff
4 years
Is there anything more feminine than a white male liberal?.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
2 years
Rest easy, buddy. Thank you for protecting our family and the love you gave us ❤️
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
2 years
San Diego State just knocked off the #1 overall seed in the NCAA Tournament and is heading to the Elite 8 for the first time in school history!!!.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
7 years
@FoxNews Conservatives wield their penises at unsuspecting women despite outcries of family values.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
2 years
Mission accomplished.
@jphoornstra
J.P. Hoornstra
2 years
Clayton Kershaw: “I’d much rather fail on the biggest stages than not get to be here at all.”.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
@CashbossYt @SwifieG @milkmaraj Spell the number you just typed out.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
I will 100% be wearing the exact same clothes at the game tomorrow, btw.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
STOP 👏🏻 QUITTING 👏🏻 ON 👏🏻 THIS 👏🏻 TEAM #LFGSD.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
2 years
EXTEND THIS MAN
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
9 months
THIS DUDE HAD SOMETHING TO SAY ABOUT PROFAR? 😂😂😂😂😂😂.
@MLBNetwork
MLB Network
9 months
JESSE WINKER WALKS IT OFF!!!!
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
7 months
Let’s not act surprised that the team with the best record in baseball has likely pushed the series to a game 5, barring a miracle. Flush it, regroup and win a ballgame on Friday night. We ride 💛🤎💛.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
Some of you dipshits need to apologize to Manny now. Bitches.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
1 year
Don’t forget to lock up when you leave @tatis_jr.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
2 years
We’re gonna need a bigger ballpark.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
4 months
This will be Dave Roberts in October, verbatim. ✅.
@NFL
NFL
4 months
"All year this team has heard, 'We got no talent. We're too small. We can't stop the run. We're not good enough to compete.'. We've just put our head down and worked hard." - @JoshAllenQB (via @NFLonCBS)
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
4 months
Once Tanner Scott heard about Gil Hodges, a single tear fell from his eye and, with shaking hands, signed on the dotted line.
@JeffPassan
Jeff Passan
4 months
Closer Tanner Scott and the Los Angeles Dodgers in agreement on a four-year, $72 million contract, sources tell ESPN. Scott, 30, was the best free agent reliever available this winter and got paid an elite amount as part of a deep Dodgers bullpen. @Feinsand was on the news.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
10 months
HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH. MAHALO TO THE dodgers BULLPEN.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
Darvish + Suarez + Hill + Hader tomorrow and get back home. Then pray.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
7 years
@watkins108 @nowthisnews That’s they are job? Makes sense.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
2 months
Built Not Bought 😎😎😎😎
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
1 year
IRRELEVANT AS FUUUUUUUUCCCCKKKKKKK.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
It's easier said than done, I realize. but if you're a boss and your employee has tickets to one of these games. have a heart. It'll come back to you in spades. Everyone wants to work for someone who understands and appreciates their passions.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
100%. If they can celebrate a 60 game championship, you can bet your ass I'll celebrate knocking off a 111 win "juggernaut" who guaranteed a WS victory.
@HannahNancarrow
👑 Hannah Nancarrow...Woods
3 years
they can’t take this away from us
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
4 years
My wife just watched @Harry_Styles and she’s pregnant again.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
5 years
Welcome Taylor Parker Woods❤️ His mama @HannahNancarrow is just an absolute bad ass. He came in kicking and screaming and now we’re chilling and listening to music. The first song he ever heard: You Are So Beautiful by Joe Cocker. Thank you for all of the well wishes 🙏
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
8 months
HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHA.
@annieheilbrunn
Annie Heilbrunn
8 months
Here is video of Manny Machado throwing the ball toward the #Dodgers dugout. The ball had just been used by Yu Darvish to warm up. Kyle Higashioka’s throw to second bounced in the dirt, so Darvish received a new ball to begin the inning. #Padres
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
2 years
Mustache Bros 4 Life
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
8 years
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
4 months
@JimBowdenGM
Jim Bowden⚾️
4 months
The Platinum Standard of #MLB Front Offices is clearly the #Dodgers led by:.Prez: Andrew Friedman.GM: Brandon Gomes.MGR: Dave Roberts.The organization is the best in the sport from top to bottom, not just because of unlimited funds.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
8 years
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
You’re a poverty fucking franchise @Mets.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
5 years
@SammyAdams @JaredDudley619 This is a tough scene
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
8 months
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHASHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAJAJJAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJJAJAJAJANJAJAJAJAJHAHAJAJHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHa.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
7 months
Just got the call from Beau’s school that he’s in the nurse’s office with nausea and to come pick him up. I’ve never been more proud, tbh.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
9 months
No one ever said he wasn’t. You guys are terrible at this.
@BlakeHHarris
Blake Harris
9 months
SO RELEVANT RIGHT NOW!!!!.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
APOLOGIZE TO JOSH BELL YOU BUFFOONS.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
Shoutout to @katiejwoo and @JakePeavy_22 for being the ONLY national media that I saw pick the @Padres in this series.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
2 years
Nine years ago tonight was our first date. She wore red yoga pants and we had the world’s most awkward hug at the end. Glad she gave me another shot
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
4 years
What a privilege it is to watch, root for, and cover this @Padres team. Such a dream come true.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
1 year
Honestly, I'd love @Ken_Rosenthal to come on tomorrow and explain to the citizens of San Diego why it's bad when we do it but "good for baseball" when they do it.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
9 months
ROY and it’s not close. Sorry Paul and Livvy.
@MLB
MLB
9 months
Jackson Merrill has 6 game-tying or go-ahead home runs in the 8th inning or later this season. No other player has more. 🤯
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
1 year
You know and I know absolutely nothing will happen to Shohei, despite his camp changing its story. Rob Manfred will go to the ends of the earth to protect him and his franchise. But the shitposting has been elite today 🫡.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
8 months
Throwing balls at players. Absolute scumbags as per usual. Just the worst fucking people.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
9 months
“Nobody buys a ticket to see Jackson Merrill play”. @StevePhillipsGM.
@Padres
San Diego Padres
9 months
JACKSON MERRILL IS REALLY GOOD AT BASEBALL
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
4 years
I’d like to buy this man dinner somewhere, so someone let me know who he is. Throw fingers, not punches.
@b_surp
Braden Surprenant
4 years
Amazing #hungryformore
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
7 months
Watching your six year old cry after a baseball game is the worst, but the sun will rise tomorrow, hope springs eternal. The greatest game in the world will break your heart. Loved being there for every pitch and now can get back to hate watching furiously. Much love.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
2 years
I say this with peace and love but if you don’t want Juan Soto here long term, you’re kind of an idiot.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
2 years
@gossipbabies Yes. No one else should move here or visit much.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
11 months
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
7 months
We saw our king @SSchumaker55 tonight but there’s no way I’m including myself in the picture with these two. Talked about Manny’s base running and how “that’s how you’re taught to do it, but nobody ever does it anymore. Manny’s IQ is so high”.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
8 months
If you pay for @MLBTV you should be able to watch any game, anywhere. Dumb bastards.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
2 years
WELL WELL WELL . You dirty, cheating Mets. I’m sick right now. 🦻.
@fuzzyfromyt
Fuzzy
2 years
SCHERZER EJECTED FOR STICKY STUFF
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
AJ PRELLER YOU MAGNIFICENT BASTARD.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
4 years
Guys. it's fine when THEY do it!.
@emptynetpapi
Max
4 years
Your boy admiring the plate here I assume .
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
Manny is a God and it’s criminal he only has 2 Gold Gloves.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
8 months
NO FUCKING WAY THAT JUST HAPPENED.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
This entire city trying to figure out how they’re gonna budget for NLCS tickets
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
6 years
OJ. Bill Cosby. who’s next? Jeez.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
2 years
Much love to the Seidler family ❤️❤️❤️ . Peter was one of the kindest, most thoughtful men I’ve had the pleasure of meeting.
@Padres
San Diego Padres
2 years
With profound sadness, the Padres announce that their Chairman and Owner Peter Seidler passed away today in San Diego. He will be dearly missed. Please see the attached press release for further detail:
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
HE DID IT AGAIN OMG 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
5 years
MAYBE EVERYONE SHUTS THE F UP AND GIVES THANKS THAT THIS DUDE IS ON OUR TEAM? WE GOOD?.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
With my “pick to click”
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
1 year
THE TATIS FAMILY OWNS THAT SHITBOX.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
1 year
Fourteen years ago tonight I was laying in bed in an extended stay in Mission Valley, staring at the ceiling, about to embark on a new career. So glad to still be here. So grateful for you guys. So grateful for San Diego. So grateful for the opportunity, still ❤️.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
4 months
Can't wait for the "This is good for baseball" takes from the usual suspects. SMH.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
7 months
Priority ONE in my opinion.
@NationPadres
Padres Nation
7 months
According to @sdutKevinAcee . The contract of Ruben Niebla.is expiring . Make him a Padre for life @Padres
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
Ray Charles back there
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
Barstool has shit on Manny for years so they can recognize deez nuts.
@barstoolsports
Barstool Sports
3 years
Folks, It's Time We Recognize That Manny Machado Is The Best Player In The National League
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
8 months
Man, I dunno. Luis Arraez seems pretty fucking good to me.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
I’ve got a little brother. I used to beat the shit out of him. Then he got bigger and stronger and socked me in the mouth. Then he threw an iron at my head.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
1 month
We’re here to F shit up
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
1 year
@DodgersMemeTeam dodgers and filling their diapers in October.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
2 years
“I want you to stay” . Congrats @snellzilla4.
@Padres
San Diego Padres
2 years
#CyZilla’s so nice, he had to do it twice 🏆. Congratulations to Blake Snell on being named the 2023 NL Cy Young Award winner!
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
9 months
Aged like milk.
@LAtowncritic
🏆🏆Dr. LATown Critic🏆🏆
9 months
JACKSON MERRILL WITH ANOTHER CLUTCH MOMENT!!! IS THERE ANYTHING THIS MAN CANT DO?!?
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
Love you @Padres. Congrats to the @Phillies . Go win it all . 😭😭😭😭😭.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
Such a spectacular day and a gutsy win from our boys. I’ll treasure it forever.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
7 months
This shit laid me out.
@SFGiantsMemer
@SFGiantsMemes
7 months
Worst, most over-hyped #WorldSeries ever.
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@thestevenwoods
Woods
3 years
WE JUST WON THE WORLD SERIES.
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