๐๐Dr. LATown Critic๐๐
@LAtowncritic
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Medical professional. All tweets sponsored by @MillerLite. A Fine Pilsner.
Joined May 2011
Me, checking my plane ticket and seeing itโs a Boeing 737:
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No one:. Joel Osteen getting ready for people seeking shelter from Beryl:
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Kikรจ doing a whole ass lap around home plate with his arms out like an airplane is sending me:
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The Los Angeles Dodgers will raise their second banner in four years at Dodger Stadium in less than 24 hours.
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Jarren Duran got punished harder than any member of the 2017 Houston Astros. Iโm sick.
Red Sox announce a two-game suspension for Jarren Duran after he directed anti-gay slur at fan
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The Dodgers: *Sign Ohtani, Yamamoto, Glasnow, Teoscar and win 114 games*. Alex Verdugo in game 5 of the world series:
The Dodgers: *Sign Ohtani, Yamamoto, Glasnow, Teoscar and win 114 games*. Alex Verdugo in game 5 of the world series:
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If I send you this, it means Iโm not showing up.
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Blake Treinen pitching with a chance to meet Donald Trump at the White House next year? . That man is going to bend space and time with that slider.
It's a one-run game in the bottom of the 9th with the bases loaded and 2 outs. Who would you rather close out the game?. (MLB x @SageUSAmerica)
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Just drove by Petco Park. Yโall need anything?
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โWhy ainโt they talkinโ bout Ozuna like they do that there Chinese feller?!โ
More proof that WAR is a made up stat that is seriously flawed. Neither play defense, OPS 50 points apart. Marcell has more homers and RBIs, yet thereโs that kind of gap. Itโs called the Ohtani bump. They are trying to bring Marcell Ozuna down. Not on my watch.
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She lived through 20 US Presidentsโฆher first being Taft. She was 3 when the Titanic sank . She was 5 when World War I began. She was 30 when World War II began. She was 42 when โI Love Lucyโ premiered. But she never saw the San Diego Padres win the World Series.
Elizabeth Francis, the oldest person in the U.S., has died in Houston at age 115
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Kikรจ Hernandez is about four wins away from having a serious case towards having his number retired at Dodger Stadium.
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No way they chanted โBeat LAโ and then IMMEDIATELY locked us out of NLDS ticket sales ๐ญ๐ญ๐ญ. The San Diego Padres may be the most cowardly sports organization in the country.
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The Padres prevented Dodger fans from buying tickets to Petco just so their fans could leave early:
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The Texas Rangers won the World Series and Adrian Beltre said โDamn, thatโs crazy. See yโall in LA.โ.
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And neither team blocked entire zip codes from buying them like a bunch of cowards.
Breaking: The 2024 World Series is the most expensive World Series ticket on record.
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He saw the Titanic sink. He saw two world wars. He saw the rise and fall of empires. He saw man go from horseback to automobiles to airplanes and to the moon. But he never saw the San Diego Padres win the World Series.
Former President Jimmy Carter Dead at 100 | Click to read more ๐
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โIโm not watching the World Series!!โ
Top 3 markets for NLCS Game 6, based on percentage of TV sets in use tuned to game:. 1. Los Angeles (38%).T2. New York (22%).T2. San Diego (22%).
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Ja Morant at Dillon Brooksโ locker tonight:
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Walker Buehler being absolutely shitfaced and hijacking the microphone in the middle of the World Series celebration should have netted him a lifetime contract on the spot:
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When all you have to do to get out of the inning is cover first but youโre just a chill guy who wants to see your 1st baseman make a play:
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The rep from Fanatics standing behind Jason Heyward like:
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Another day, another Pantone 294 Ponzi scheme:
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Little known fact: . The San Diego Padres petition the league to paint this on their field whenever the Dodgers visit Petco Park during the regular season:
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- She saw two world wars. - She saw the rise and fall of the Soviet Union. - She saw man go from horses to rockets. - But she never saw the San Diego Padres win a World Series.
The worldโs oldest living person, Marรญa Branyas Morera, has died at the age of 117. She was the eighth oldest verified person in human history.
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Thereโs a common denominator hereโฆI just canโt quite figure out what it isโฆ
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Shohei Ohtani, a guy who picks up trash after games, donates millions to charity, and chose to defer $59 million of salary per year says he was scammed by a person who he's trusted for decades. Trent, a WalMart greeter from Houston: hE juHsT LiKe pEtE rOsE!!!!.
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The San Diego Padres really hosted a sold out watch party for their preseason game against the Dodgers at Petco Park. What an unserious franchise ๐ญ๐ญ๐ญ
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Guess whoโs next!
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Walker Buehler blew out his elbow to try and save the Dodgersโ season in an NLCS elimination game because Max Scherzer bitched out. He will forever be slander proof in my book.
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I too, make up stories for clout.
Got back to my car to a slashed tire ๐ fucking assholes must have seen me get off with padres gear. Whatever makes them feel better. Iโll trade a slash tire for a W any day.
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Martin Maldonado addressing the team:.
Martรญn Maldonado said several Astros addressed the team after todayโs loss, including himself. He termed the sweep โa slap in the face.โ.
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Get this fucking psycho on the postseason roster and letโs ride!
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All them first round exit jokes ainโt so funny now are they?.
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The Dallas Cowboys secondary getting torched by a special needs child in the least surprising thing to happen this season:
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Padres fans pretending to care about displaced Mexicans is hilarious when you realize what family Peter Siedler came from.
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Padres must still be hungover from their championship celebration on Monday.
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Roki Sasaki after Yu Darvish finishes telling him about the San Diego Padresโ rich history of winning a regular season series against the Dodgers once every few years.
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Dave Roberts finding out starters can go more than 80 pitches:
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Zack Greinke watching Will Harris waste his gem:
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JACKSON MERRILL WITH ANOTHER CLUTCH MOMENT!!! IS THERE ANYTHING THIS MAN CANT DO?!?
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The Giants pulled a weak ass troll move with that Mickey ears giveaway, and Andrew Friedman responded by winning the World Series, taking their ace, and their highest ranking executive. That organization may never recover.
Farhan Zaidi is talking to the Dodgers about a front office role per Ken Rosenthal.
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Bro doesnโt believe in Santa, but he believes the Astrosโ 2017 World Series championship is legit.
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I personally would be shocked to find out that Manny Machado threw a ball at Dave Roberts. It would be so out of character for him to do something like that:
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Name a better duo than the San Diego Padres and being eliminated.
The Padres have reportedly been eliminated in the Roki Sasaki sweepstakes. #MLBNHotStove | @jonmorosi
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Fernando Tatis Jr has spent more time suspended for steroids than he has with his own daughter.
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No one:. Manny Machado between innings:
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Walking around Sea World decked out in Dodgers gear. Two Padres fans have already come up to me in tears. One of them told me โI knew this was never a rivalry. Weโll always be the little brother.โ . He tried to hug me, and I pushed him to the ground. He just laid there crying.
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Win or lose, Iโm just mentally preparing for another weekend of this:
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โHow did a guy worth over $100 million not notice $4.5 million was missing?โ. - Someone who literally sweats while Nissan runs their credit to finance a 2008 Altima.
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Imagine saying the Dodgers have a Hollywood lifestyle after signing with a team that was passing out opioids like they were Skittles. Could not be me.
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Name an athlete and their kryptonite.
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We should have been focusing on the real enemy all along.
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People talking about leaving California like itโs a threat. Bitch, have you seen the freeways? You will not be missed. Enjoy Nebraska though.
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And no rings.
Man we are in a golden age of Padres ball. Best booth, best team, best ballpark, best city. What a time.
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Babe, wake up! Padres fans are embarrassing themselves again!.
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Your friendly reminder that @BenVerlander is an asshole and owes Freedie Freeman an apology.
Freddie Freeman was scratched from tonightโs Dodgers lineup, and is flying back to LA, Dave Roberts said. His 3-year-old son, Maximus, has been in the hospital this week, according to an Instagram post yesterday from Freemanโs wife, Chelsea. No timeline on how long heโll be gone.
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โBrock Purdy did everything he could tonightโ. Brock Purdy:
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If Andrew Friedman turns either Muncy, or Chris Taylor into Nolan Arenado, I will personally carve his center field statue myself.
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Blake Treinen seeing a Dominican try and steal the American news cycle:
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Colin Kaepernick meeting with the Jets:
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Jalen Green when the Rockets need him to come through:
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It still amazes me that Cubs fans sat there and watched Alex Gonzalez botch an inning ending double play ball, and had the nerve to spend the next two decades blaming Steve Bartman for losing that game.
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Idk but taking pictures of complete strangers in public without their knowledge when you could simply mind your own fucking business doesnโt sit well with me. Smh.
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I don't know how else to say it. If this does happen, the Red Sox got off scot-free with something that the Astros got absolutely hammered for.
It'll be interesting to see if Alex Cora emerges as one of the candidates to run Boston's baseball operations. He has a broad range of experience, and others in the organization felt he increased his presence in the player development this year.
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Aaron Judge in the regular season vs Aaron Judge in the postseason:
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I get regular people are gonna get their jokes off on Ohtani, and that's all well and good. But if you're and actual paid reporter, and don't bother to do even one second of research before firing off some troll tweet, please don't cry about why your industry is dying.
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When youโre 100 feet away from the entrance but you see someone holding the door open for you.
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If the Astros win the World Series, I will. Congratulate their fanbase and not act like a bitter douchebag just because my team hasn't been able to close the deal yet.
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Meanwhile, in San Diego:
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This really was their World Series ๐ญ๐ญ๐ญ.
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Bro recorded this like he was on the big screen at Petco Park ๐ญ๐ญ๐ญ๐ญ.
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All of us watching England blow a 13 colony lead:
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This is quite possible the corniest thing Iโve ever seen in my life.
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If the Lakers struggle tonight, just cancel the playoffs.
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I know Jack Flaherty talked a lot about how much he admires Clayton Kershaw, but there are better ways to honor him than by imitating one of his NLCS performances.
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Angels and Padres fans talking the absolute loudest about Shohei Ohtani just for their players to ACTUALLY be guilty of betting on baseball is why no one will ever take those organizations seriously.
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Tim Anderson leaving Progressive Field:
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Chris Taylor getting that Zoom invite from Andrew Friedman and HR:
The Dodgers are calling up Cuban OF/INF Miguel Vargas (24), per sources. No word yet on whether he will be activated today or what the official move will be.
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My uncle passed away this morning after a pretty long illness. Heโd been basically all but written off about 3 times in the last couple of years and came back every time. Iโm just fucking sad right now, but one thing that gives me comfort is the last time I talked to him.
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LAFC really had Galaxy tortas fighting each other?!
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No one:. Dave Roberts pulling his hottest hitter for a guy who cost the team a run the night before because he had his head up his own ass:
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Imagine flexing that another fanbase took over your stadium.
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@thebennett8 Literally everyone is laughing at you cowards.
The Padres have restrictions placed on who can purchase NLDS tickets ๐
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Every time someone cries about the Dodgersโ payroll, I remember that I lived through this. Fuck your feelings.
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Oh, Archie Bradley finally gets an inning without giving up a run and suddenly thinks heโs fucken Eric Gagne?.
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