sort -R /usr/share/dict/words|head -4; make a memorable XKCD-style passphrase. ex: "cannibalistic shootable paralipomenon secessionists"

Was excited to hear about @lilyallen's new album on R4 Today this morning - and went shopping for it. Apparently while it was released to streamers last week, we have to wait until the end of January to get physical media. Well fuck you very much. Pre-ordered it anyway.

This Vienna Red from @BlackLodgeBrew is beer of the fortnight, exactly like a red lager but with the thickness and mouth feel of a cask ale. Only complaint is that the pump clip was unreadable because of my red/green colour blindness so only realised what it was after a gulp.

My @AmazonUK driver couldn't find our building, the huge pink building with the address written in massive gold text directly above the door, that he delivers do literally every day. In completely unrelated news, it is raining very hard right now.

Strong desire for @reaperhulk 's Morbotron but for Red Dwarf.

The amount of grey cars on the road is an abomination. Car manufacturers should be made to ensure a certain percentage of cars are bright colours.

And this https://t.co/oiJyZQ25CV is why I cancelled my recurring subscription to @duolingo

@CrossCountryUK "Our forms won’t accept any of the following characters, please remove and try again. % ; ‘ --" Jesus wept, your incompetence astounds. Rather than defending correctly against SQL injection attacks, you simply make it impossible to submit a complaint with correct grammar.

Sigh, no catering again on the 1825 @CrossCountryUK service from MAN* - especially maddening if you'd paid extra to have some. Even @arrivanorthwest manage this with more reliability. * "Subject to availability" doesn't mean much if it's /never/ available.

The @CAMRA_Official app, which hasn't had working subscriptions for years, has just auto renewed a subscription and it has no way to complain or even cancel the continuous payment authority. App help takes you to a unrelated webpage. 10/10. I feel a card dispute happening.

Last three tweets from @TheCoopLive : Postponed, Postponed, Our May calendar is looking 👌 I think they meant 🫰

After being told, repeatedly, to "rest assured" and other copy-and-pasted trite platitudes from @Geopost_news my parcel is still missing in action, and now their chatbot, phone line, and even "is our service funted at the moment" webpages are, in fact, all funted.

Box of @vaultcitybrew is in the quantum superposition of delayed in the Irlam depot, out for delivery, and delivery attempted but I wasn't in (I am). It's already late, but I am to "rest assured" it will arrive tomorrow though, when I'm not in. I remember when DPD was good.

Not only will @Brsk_uk give your name and email to a marketing company without your permission and lie to you about it, they'll also decide not to honour referral codes and expect you to have premonitions about their failure in order to fix it. One to avoid.

🚨 SARAH HUGHES DARK RUBY MILD KLAXON 🚨 🔥 OAKHAM INFERNO BEACON 🔥 🦢 THORNBRIDGE WILD SWAN ATTACK 🦢

Google Bard just parroted my own code that I wrote 14 years ago back at me, but this time with a buffer overflow and an invitation to relicense it under different ownership.

In celebration of receiving @totalcurtis 's excellent new book "Manchester's Best Beer Pubs & Bars", 🚨 SARAH HUGHES DARK RUBY MILD KLAXON 🚨

New liquids festering in the cellar @BossBrewingCo @LeatherBritBrew @SalopianBrewery @MilestoneBrewi1 @StewartBrewing @FyneAles @ElgoodsBrewery1 @miltonbrewery @OakhamAles @PortobelloRob @thornbridge

Lovely content-free copy-pasted reply from @Deliveroo support including the great phrase "IF CUSTOMER REFERENCES RIDER AS A DELIVEROO EMPLOYEE USE THIS WORDING - REMOVE IF NOT NEEDED" - followed by "they're self-employed, courts agree"

🚨 SARAH HUGHES DARK RUBY MILD KLAXON 🚨

This cat just sauntered in like it owns the place. Still, more friendly and significantly better looking than the normal occupant of this chair.