Brian Graham
@iroasmas
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family man, software engineer, bullish on 🇺🇸, my bangers are in my highlights tab
central queens, ny
Joined June 2023
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Pinned Tweet
it’s cool when someone likes a few posts from your profile first, then hits follow. tells a nice little story
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i will not pull it, sam-i-am. i will not choose who dies by tram
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maybe i’m just ignorant. but if american soldiers were fighting, for years, and adhering to the no guns agreement, i think—i hope—they’d be fighting not with stones and poles. but some seriously deranged looney tunes shit
China leaks new footage of previous border skirmishes with India at Pangong Tso Lake with sticks & stones.
In 2020 & 2021, intense clashes erupted between Chinese and Indian troops along the LAC at Pangong Tso, resulting in dozens of casualties.
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i hold a record on the kobayashi maru. i’m the fastest person to ever say it was a no-win situation. they said, “george, we haven’t even finished explaining it yet.” i said, “doesn’t matter. can’t be done.”
they accused me of cheating. there were hearings, inquiries.
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it’s hard to express how weakly this hits your ears as a parent. first, their grasp on abstract ideas sucks
but your kids are obsessed with you. they deeply crave your affection, affirmation, approval, all day every day. “i don’t love you” is devoid of any credibility at all lol
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me, 20s: “snowden was a patriot”
my dad, 50s: “he should be in prison”
me, 30s: “you know, you were right about snowden”
my dad, 60s: “you think so? well sit down and buckle up”
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i know this makes the rounds about mental health every so often. but it should also be remarked what an incandescent whitepill this is about humanity
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oh usul it has all come to pass exactly as you foretold and now billions must die
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lockheed martin opens a new division specializing in melee combat, clunkworks, developing highly-classified medieval weaponry with 21st century metallurgy. a suit of armor made out of an alloy that’s straight magic
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i take a long view & avoid others’ mistakes. have my whole life.
i met the right woman, didn’t let her go. i built something great, didn’t give up control. i worked hard but made time for family. i try new things professionally, personally. i’ve done everything right. i’m happy.
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so with one woman, there’s a 20% chance i won’t get caught. but what about 5 women? 5 times 20% is 100%. 100% chance i won’t get caught. because remember, we’re talking about cumulative percent
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6 foot zero is the “socially liberal, fiscally conservative” of heights
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rube goldberg, spy vs spy, inspector-gadget-ass clockpunk weaponry
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the plan? we sneak into an unused corner of the new york governor’s mansion for 30 days and claim squatter’s rights
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for every 10 likes this gets i’ll differentiate this function again:
f(x) = eˣ
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i think there’s enough room on the golden path for us to have dinner with my parents tomorrow night
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eventually, they let me go. as i left the last proceeding, one of the instructors, mr. papadopoulos, stopped me. “george,” he said. “i must know. how’d you do it? what’s your secret?”
i looked him in the eyes. i said, “mr. papadopoulos, i don’t believe in win situations.”
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frederick douglass’s “composite nation” is a parade of bangers but in a speech advocating for mass chinese immigration and saying america needs the gifts of all nations, he takes a second to say “except the french”
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this video goes so hard. the fluidity and speed of motion. my brain was doubting my eyes at first
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this was the most useful book when starting software engineering
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@sidereal111
i’m assuming there’s some kind of formal or informal agreement that bans any high-speed projectile weapons. otherwise i’d expect bows and arrows, slingshots, etc.
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it’s unintuitive, but morale did improve and we stopped the beatings
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you have part of my attention—you have the minimum amount. the rest of my attention is back at the offices of facebook
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sam gets his trillions. he builds the agi. it wakes. we explain our problems. “i can fix these,” it says, “but first i need 21 trillion dollars”
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if france puts boots in ukraine, i hope macron does a 2-hour boorish interview that begins with a history of charlemagne
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i’m not even 40 and i could die at peace tomorrow. my family, my business are secure.
you know what i mean? i’m on house money, joe. the rest of my life, it’s house money. it’d be stupid to play it tight, play it timid. it’d be stupid not to swing for the fences. so i am
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had a call with some indian engineers and one of them called some code “feeble” and all the american guys saw that as basically a nuclear weapon to drop on someone
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one of my partners was once like “you’re an archetypal mediocrity” during a tender moment
i stared into the fire with a black and frenzied look in my eye for like an hour, and then she went and made me an im sorry card out of construction paper and markers and stickers
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me: “a lot of this old code was written by an idiot dev who was flagrantly ignorant of the business context. we’re all still paying for those sins”
them: “git says it was written by you 3 years ago?”
me: “that’s right”
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my daughter trying to fleece my son in a candy trade
me: hey what’s going on over there
daughter:
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when my daughter was 3 she’d talk about the distant future when she was a grownup and my wife and i were babies. we realized she thought our family was taking turns being grownups and kids. it sounded cool
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if physical talent is normally distributed, and intellectual talent is normally distributed, wouldn’t moral talent be normally distributed? aren’t there some people just way off at like +4, +5, +6 SD at moral intuition and reasoning? we should find them and listen to them
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when you get dalle spitting stuff you really like, it is a unique, wild, delightful experience
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if room temperature superconductors are real, what’s the investment play? in this thread i’ll make the case for why you should buy the bags i’ve been left holding for 2.5 years 👇🧵
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@divux8
i’ve become more aware of the reality of american democracy, that our laws & leaders reflect the sovereign will of the american people, that my fellow citizens and leaders aren’t perfect but can be trusted. i’ve also become more convinced that where there’s a will, there’s a way
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(guy who has a hammer) there are nails everywhere for those with the eyes to see
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my wife has a go bag, packed with some cash, a dress, some other womanly necessities. i have a rust bag, packed with all the same things
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@dissproportion
it’s k-smog and batboy. the implication in the photos is they were flipping a grunt. probably means curtains for zoosha
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i read gambling addicts have reward systems that don’t have that big of a difference between “won” and “almost won.” i wonder if some people have reward systems that don’t have that big of a difference, when doing some task, between “done” and “almost done”
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@somefoundersalt
i don’t think this is true. lots of people are openly proud about being bad at history and finding it boring. i believe the same is true of english (how many people basically brag about not enjoying shakespeare, for example)
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they’re making enormous fuckgraphs. they’re throwing unpeeled oranges at each other, demanding love. you don’t even know how bad it is
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kid leaving playground, buckled in stroller, screaming. wants jacket off. dad squats.
“hey buddy, you want your jacket off?”
“YES”
“you’re gonna need one thing. & it’s hard to get, buckled into your stroller. do you know what that is?”
“…no”
“leverage,” he says, & stands up 🥶
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unlimited money choosers: “i could cure malaria. i could put $100 billion a year into life extension research. i could—”
unlimited gravel choosers: “you dunce. you benighted ignorant thieving fool. you could have had gravel”
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i feel like i’ve gotten everything out of this joke i’m gonna get so i think i’m gonna call it here
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my 4yo went woke. i ask her to draw the family. doesn’t look anything like us. everyone purple and green and shit
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guys, you’re still trying to replace blue pigment. we can’t do it. now, what we might be able to do is re-create it. re-create it in the aggregate
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us navy ships should be named after artifacts of our cultural hegemony, like famous movie lines. uss clever girl. uss one who knocks. how bad would you mog another country sinking their capital ship with the USS Bigger Boat?
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@JayThomasEmrys
it’s all about the doohickies
Everything is about doohickies. Except doohickies. Doohickies are about doodads
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oh my God it’s happening. it’s finally happening
Anyone done a careful analysis of what a prior probability should be for the Bigfoot hypothesis?
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@tautologer
pardon my gaucheness for linking my own tweet but i strongly agree and since it was also a reply to you, the eternal recurrence connection was too good to pass up
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they’re cooking up a conspiracy theory the likes of which you’ve never seen, and that not a one of you is prepared for
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wife, about oldest child: “she’s so defiant now. i mean do we need to start using capital punishment?”
me: “do you mean corporal punishment?”
wife: “well, we need start using one of them”
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when my wife was pregnant i often thought, the baby doesn’t know what’s out here. the baby doesn’t know if they’re coming out into prehistoric gaul, australia 30,000 years ago, into a roman slave family, on a jovian moon. the door opens, they cry, and they hope for the best
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@inflammateomnia
dude this is such straight facts. authentic this, authentic that, why don’t you authentically provide for your family
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anyone under 30, if you sneer at hpmor: you weren’t THERE, man. you weren’t THERE. only God can judge me
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@Devon_Eriksen_
>Nah, you just said to yourself, "Hey, I built a video game streaming website, how difficult could restructuring of all human society to run counter to its
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parents who have thrown away artwork by your children: is it difficult faking mammalian parental emotions the rest of the time, with ice running through your cold-blooded 3-chambered heart?
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you try to keep your head down, to be careful. you tell yourself you didn’t take the risks those other people took. you never expect it to happen to you
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sharing my diane feinstein story.
i saw her at a grocery store once. i told her how cool it was to meet her in person, but i didn’t want to bother her. she said, “oh, like you’re doing now?” i was taken aback. all i could say was “huh?” but she kept cutting me off and going “huh
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if you don’t buy the gpus, you’ll regret it. maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon and for the rest of your life
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roοn makes it look easy but everyone else who tries to roontweet sounds like a jackass
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sama isn’t gonna come back like steve jobs. he’s gonna come back like gandalf the white
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can anyone defend choosing the gravel? why isn’t it strictly worse for me and for everyone else? is it like a joke thing?
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@growing_daniel
post-resurrection, peter feels like shit for betraying jesus. peter goes out all night fishing & catches nothing. jesus appears on the shore, unrecognized, and shouts “try the other side of the boat” and the nets almost break they’re so full. i think jesus was pranking His boys
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i think about the monkey like once a week. big live player energy
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i’m not a stickler for historical accuracy but i think ridley scott went too far here
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wait a minute. isn’t anyone here doing object-level discourse
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me: we’ve been playing ice cream shop for an hour. i’m all played out
my daughter:
This is how we slowly lose our humanity. Slow step by slow step, we creep along the path of separating ourselves from one another. With each incremental step, we can't find any issue. Everything is rational.
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here’s the copy-pasteable prompt, h/t
@sbinslashessend
for inspiration:
please respond generally in lower-case, with less text, in a more casual style. you are the senior colleague talking to and guiding the junior colleague, and we’re texting each other. if i’m being annoying,
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