Dr. Rebecca Gibson
@RGibsongirl
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Corset scholar; bioanth PhD; chaotic neutral--harlequin aspect; bibliophile; tattooed; advocate 4 the dead; cyborg/transhuman/robot lover; bad example 4 hire.♿️
Joined November 2009
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$LEGION
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Pinned Tweet
Any prof who assigns
#TheCorsetedSkeleton
,
#DesireInTheAgeOfRobotsAndAI
,
#MonstrousMalesFatalFemales
or
#GlobalPerspectiveOnTheLiminalityOfTheSupernatural
to their course, in whole or in part, should feel free to hit me up for a zoom guest lecture!
Email and links below!
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My students: *legit nervous for final projects*
Me: My ducklings, literally just turn something in, please.
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God. Just realized. We've reached a generation of people who don't have first-hand knowledge of *why* the falling text in the Matrix is green.
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Seeing a lot of "PhD IS a real doctor!" tweets, and just wanted to remind everyone:
We're actually the original doctors. MDs weren't granted until 1703, JDs were all PhDs to begin with, and the first PhD was granted in 1150.
We're the OG doctorate.
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For a small fee, I will go to your enemy's conference presentation, be the first one to raise my hand, and have "more a comment than a question" for 3/4 of whatever time is allotted for questions. For a bit extra, I'll make sure to remind them of how tenuous their argument is.
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Orrrrrrr, and hear me out, you could just NOT hold the game if there's a chance that people watching it will LITERALLY freeze to death.
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Sometimes I am amazed by my life. Next semester, I am teaching a course on the anthropology of tea.
We're going to learn about tea ceremonies, and try different types of tea, and devise our own tea ceremony with our own meanings, and it's going to be the coziest class ever.
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BTW, the "bounty for info on your neighbor" has a precedent: when people were paid for reporting self-freed enslaved people.
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To be fair to my vet: $109 is really cheap for being seen by two doctors, getting antibiotics, an eye exam, and sent home with pain relief.
To be fair to me: I just paid $109 + two uber rides because my snake has arthritis and bit himself in the ass.
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Requiring diagnosis to proceed with accommodation IS gatekeeping.
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Today I met a legend, AND SHE LET ME PET HER!
I give you, Francine, queen of the local Lowe's!
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Put the salary in the ad. Put the salary in the ad. Put the salary in the ad. Put the salary in the ad. Put the salary in the ad. Put the salary in the ad. Put the salary in the ad. Put the salary in the ad. Put the salary in the ad. Put the salary in the ad. Put the salary in th
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She.
Is.
NINE.
And she wrote a fucking GAME.
At nine, I was writing excrutiatingly bad poetry.
Buy the girl a crown, and teach her serious coding if you're that fucking particular.
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@RoboticoEl
...hmmm. I mean... Yeah, I got nothing. Sympathy, friend. I'd offer a fistbump, but I think your hands have gone through enough today.
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@AITA_online
If someone suggested I spend "$150-$500" on a puppet for use for one day during their wedding, I would laugh myself ALL THE WAY out of the friendship.
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What's new in the 2020 hellscape?
Academic job ads for "adjunct associate professor."
Let that one sink in for a moment...
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Writing rubrics like a good girl when all I want to do is scrawl "JUST DON'T HALF-ASS THIS AND YOU'LL GET FULL POINTS" across a piece of paper and post that up on Canvas.
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PUT THE SALARY IN THE AD. PUT THE SALARY IN THE AD. PUT THE SALARY IN THE AD. PUT THE SALARY IN THE AD. PUT THE SALARY IN THE AD. PUT THE SALARY IN THE AD. PUT THE SALARY IN THE AD. PUT THE SALARY IN THE AD. PUT THE SALARY IN THE AD. PUT THE SALARY IN THE AD. PUT THE SALARY IN TH
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I just saw a job in DC at a private university where the starting salary was 37k.
For a full time university job.
In DC.
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@ProfaneFeminist
Honestly don't think "are you okay" was meant in *quite* the way he took it...
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Dear Gmail predictive text,
No, I decidedly do NOT want to type "Agatha Christianity." No one in the history of ever has wanted to type that. Get it together.
Sincerely yours,
me
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I know that twitter wasn't created with me saying "fuck you, you fascist bitch" directly to KellyAnne Conway in mind, but it's a great pleasure to exercise my first amendment rights by saying "fuck you, you fascist bitch" directly to KellyAnne Conway.
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Dude you are in tactical gear, shut the fuck up.
"I GOT CAUGHT UP IN THE MOMENT."
Idaho man says he was the guy hanging from the balcony of the Senate. He's now apologizing to the American people and asking for forgiveness.
Story:
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How much of "imposter syndrome" is really just "no one will pay me to do what I happen to be excellently trained for and really fucking good at" syndrome?
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@pengpeng_xiao
TBH as something of a rockstar myself, I'm here for the ratio you're getting. Thanks for letting me know my current (absolutely brilliant, talented) students (with loads of potential) have zero chance in your department.
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Wow, this took off... If you followed me, I've tried to follow back--sometimes twitter doesn't show all the follows right away. Welcome to my quippy twitter, where it's mostly swearing and cat RTs.
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A student just turned in their final project, a round-the-world charcuterie board, and I cannot begin to tell you how much of a gift it was to spend an hour eating cheese and talking to a very lovely person. I feel like this deserves an award, not a grade.
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@iamyesyouareno
No, this is *extremely* France. Building barricades and lighting shit on fire is kind of just what they do. Victor Hugo wrote a whole book about it.
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My apologies for not replying to your email sooner, every time I looked at it I was overcome by existential dread and ennui, and had to go lie down.
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@deestiv
Also, it's perfectly okay to want to be alive, and to want that above wanting anything else. Fucks sake, no one at all needs to martyr themselves for even a very wanted baby. Your life has worth outside of the children you (may) bear.
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Dear restaurant websites,
The information I want is:
When you're open,
what you serve,
how much it costs.
In that order.
Everything else on the website can be hidden, I'll look for it if I'm interested, thanks.
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@whatuphails
Brought to you by trying to keep two classes of undergrads all pointed in the same direction on a trip to the local zoo for primate observation. Bless them.
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Not enough things are made in royal blue or emerald green.
What is your pettiest fashion gripe? I don't mean something super serious and important. Give me PETTY.
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I've just updated my CV and with
38 conference presentations
9 podcast appearances
13 invited lectures
15 articles and chapters
and
5 books/book projects (three published, two in proposal)
I am BEGGING employers to look past the adjunct work on the first page.
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Pissed off a lot of my grad profs when they said "oh, this is excellent, it's so dense you'll need to read it several times," and I said "oh, you mean it's written badly."
Just because you’re struggling to understand a paper does not mean it’s necessarily ‘good’.
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@TimeIsNotGiven
@AITA_reddit
I would be like, O. M. G. TELL me where you got your clothes. You MADE them?? GIRL. You are AMAZING.
This dude needs to take his massive self-esteem problems and eff off.
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@AITA_reddit
YTA, and if you're going to give your daughter a pseudonym, at lease remember it for two paragraphs, ffs.
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If it starts this early, no wonder my students eventually come to me absolutely *terrified* to be creative.
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Actually, build the *opposite* of this. These routes are already highly saturated w/transport options. You don't need to get from Baltimore to Boston in an hour by train, you need to get from Boston to Colorado in less than a day & a half. THAT'S what would spur economic growth.
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My dear friends, I am so happy and relieved to announce that I am *not* leaving academia, hopefully for quite some time. This Fall, I will re-join the School of World Studies at Virginia Commonwealth University, in the Anthropology Department, at the rank of Assistant Professor.
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I DID IT. 250 FINAL PROJECTS GRADED IN 9 HOURS. TIME FOR A DRINK.
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One thing I love about these cats is how they always look like you have deeply disappointed them. The hurt goes all the way to their souls. Perhaps one day you might make it up to them, but not today.
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No offense to the OP, but I legit can't stand this type of thing which smacks of "I didn't find x uncomfortable why shld other people?"
I was 30 when I started grad school, sorry I didn't want to give up my privacy/a good night's sleep to fit ur opinion of what's good, I guess??
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I am *SUPER* stoked to go see the new Hunger Games movie in a few weeks, & I love all of the books, so this is meant as *very* mild criticism, but:
I think authors shld have to say their characters' names out loud to friends, family, & strangers before they finalize them... 1/2
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@AITA_reddit
Prediction, without reading, from the title: I'm going to hate this and YTA. Will report back after reading.
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@Tim_Org
If this is your tipping point on a candidate, you need to reevaluate your priorities.
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@keen_ralph
As people tend to default to Mrs., I rather insist upon Dr.
Like, don't get me wrong, it's Rebecca UNTIL you call me by the wrong title. If we're going to be formal, you're going to use the correct fucking title.
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Legit it's the *WEIRDEST* fucking thing, looking at dissertations before the internet.
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@adam_round_3
@AITA_reddit
Yeah, that's a lot of angst over a TV show that basically anyone can access now. I...think there's a lot more to the story, and wish they'd processed it before they procreated.
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Anyone else have intellectual crushes? Like "I want to unspool your mind and drape it around myself like a lace shawl...but in a totally platonic and non-creepy way" type of thing?
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"Accepted with minor revisions"! Your girl's going to be published in the flagship journal of the American Anthropological Association!
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It's me, I'm door people.
St Mary & St Edward, Barrow Gurney
A door for door people.
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Hey, you know what's "safety theatre"?
Making us take off our shoes and dump our liquids before getting on a plane.
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What would happen if adjuncts took the "you're not allowed to work more than x hours/week" contract clause seriously?
No grading large classes on the weekends. No setting up the LMS before the 1st day of classes. No answering emails after hours. The whole system would collapse.
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To everyone asking what happens to Camilla if Charles predeceases her, like you all didn't watch Downton Abbey: she becomes a dowager--title & various perks of the title remain, any power of the office does not, & she gets to hang around the palace saying sharp but witty things.
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@AITA_reddit
*ding ding ding* Retaliation against a gay/bi coworker for when you made a racist comment and got in trouble for it, you, sir, are T biggest A.
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The snake and owner have been reunited, but this was up on the elevator a few days ago:
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In solidarity with all my other female academics who are apparently not supposed to have or show our physical forms, have a bikini pic, Academic Twitter:
Also, I don't think twitter's photo edit mode knows what "crop" means.
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I just won a grant!! My first medium sized grant as a NTT assistant professor! Giving me the chance to make my classes better with new materials!
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This is *gorgeous* and there's no graceful way to get into or out of it.
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Yes, you should be able to divorce for no reason at all. "I don't want to be married (to you) anymore" is enough of a justification for divorce. Reject this moralizing bullshit.
@DeeGoingsGirl
Accepting "abuse" as biblical grounds for divorce. Pretty soon you'll be getting divorced for no reason at all, because "abuse" can mean anything you don't like.
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I've reached my follow limit for today, so I'll catch up on following people back tomorrow!!
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Academics of all ages/ranks, I implore you: take a class on how to create a ppt and how to deliver a lecture in ways that will interest your audience.
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When you Fight for 15 for university staff (which you should! everyone deserves it!) remember that adjuncts are apparently not covered by min wage requirements & are making much less.
One of my jobs works out to $6.80/hr. The other is $3.50.
For this privilege, I earned a PhD.
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I'm just a prof
standing in front of her intro students
pleading for some paragraph breaks, omg what is this wall of text bb you're killing me...
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Note: I AM NOT DISSING THE STUDENTS so everyone chill tf out, but.
During orientation, before setting foot in class, students should be EXPLICITLY told to check their email once per business day for communication from their profs.
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...okay but this is *literally* a teenager's idea of edgy punk. She looks like she's playing dress-up with a My First Goth Makeup kit.
Jojo Siwa reveals that she isn’t that innocent after all:
“Just wait until I drop that F bomb,” she warns
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@LouisatheLast
@tressiemcphd
Also, I noticed in some of the through-shots that...there are totally neighbors in viewing distance. Like, if I'm buying a totally glass house, I'm also buying so much land that the only thing overlooking me is geese.
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*clears throat* *taps microphone*
PLEASE DON'T MAKE YOUR VISITING PROFESSORS FORMALLY MENTOR/ADVISE STUDENTS, THEY WON'T BE THERE NEXT YEAR, AND IF YOUR DEPARTMENT NEEDS ADVISING COVERED, YOU NEED TO HIRE TENURE TRACK, THANKS.
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@RdotSpoon
@sagethestallion
Well, Trent Crimm from The Independent needs to pull his mask up over his nose.
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@zombieseas
@feminemi1y
"Let us now turn our hymnals to the Song of Menstruations (Pads Pads Pads)."
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@SharpDressdDyke
@Volsicle
Look, I would prefer all students pass the class and do perfectly on every assignment but after this long I know that I can't *make* you not fail, and I can't make you care, and I'm certainly not going to care in your stead, so if you want that zero...go for it, friend.
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Controversial opinion: you don't need fabric softener. Your fabric isn't un-soft. You've just been very profitably marketed to.
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It wouldn't be the holiday season if I didn't spend part of the evening blocking people on reddit for *insisting* that the proper ingredient for a peppermint latte is...peppermint essential oil, not peppermint syrup. It's amazing they haven't already perished, honestly.
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@ask_aubry
It was pee. Pregnancy and childbirth often lead to incontinence, particularly if the bladder/urethra is being stressed. You made her pee. Congrats, dude.
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In
15 days
I will have published
Three books in three years
As a contingent faculty member
(Two monographs, and one edited volume)
Imagine what I could have done with actual employment.
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Hello, my name is Dr. Rebecca Gibson, and I'm going to keep making people uncomfortable by talking about how underemployed me and other contingent academics are until the entire fucking system changes and we're all paid living wages and unionized to a fare-thee-well.
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We really need more space for the trades in education. Like, REALLY. The most unhappy students I see are ones who would rather be woodworking, working on cars, or running plumbing, but who are stuffed into the university mold because eDUcAtioN.
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Are you a "flouting the rules by wearing a wide strap sleeveless shirt" female academic, or* a "take me seriously, I'm wearing a blazer" female academic?
*Yes, there's other choices, this is a joke tweet not a paper I'm asking you to peer review.
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In late October, one of my students died. I'm fine but also not okay/will never be okay with that, because these are my children* but what I really want to address right now is the end of the semester.
A thread.
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@conor64
Not whipping out your dick during work hours is like Adulting 101, and this tweet suggests you would do it too, otherwise why so defensive?
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@Toadcialism
@HorzaEdeo
@LisforLia
At one point FedEx asked why I couldn't fax something to them, and I said because I'm not living in the 1980s.
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Just saw a tweet (and then promptly lost it) where someone said that grading essays for a 70 student class was impossible, and then got ridiculed for it.
So, hey, can we stick to punching up at the system that gives us 70 student classes, rather than down at the profs... 1/3
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In case you are looking for a reason to panic, next week is August.
You're welcome.
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I don't take my "rate my professor" score seriously at all, but I would particularly like to applaud the student who remarked that in order to get a good grade in my class, you only need to...
...do the homework correctly.
Yes, my duckling, that's exactly what you need to do.
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My dear everyone who keeps saying this,
We know; we don't care. If it bothers you/you're an editor, do a global search and replace, it takes 10 seconds, and leave us alone with our double spaces, ffs.
No love,
An Old
My dear writing friends, it is no longer standard to put two spaces after terminal punctuation.
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@ask_aubry
If you heard a *snap* sound, that was my vagina sealing itself shut and drying up like a desert.
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Potentially unpopular opinion: you do not need scented trash bags; you just need to take your trash out more often.
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I just submitted an application for a job that I really really really really really really want. Really a lot. So if you could all think good thoughts for me...
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