Microplastics Exploder
@DiabolicalSpuds
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strange but not a stranger alt: @sputuminducer
Joined October 2022
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Last Seen Profiles
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Alright new account so new thread of Mystifying TikTok Characters
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This incredibly sincere white guy trying Indian food for the very first time and having his mind blown is so wholesome
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Are you 8 years old
Who just learned that the drink dispensers at restaurants actually dispense syrup and carbonated water instead of drink like you’d get straight out of a bottle?
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THESE PICS DO NOT HAVE THE DESIRED RHETORICAL IMPACT YOU IMAGINED
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Got on my plane. There was a guy sitting in my seat. He didn't know the seats were numbered, didn't know what his number was, and was mad as hell I was asking him. Why are people like this
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Drug addicts and homeless people aren't fucking cryptids lmao they aren't going to attack you just for waking by.
Me being scared to walk past the crackhead infront of 7/11
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If you put a new trash bag in the can *before* you take the trash to the dumpster, the chore is entirely done when you get back inside. Little tricks like this keep you from killing yourself in your 30's.
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You don't. The damage is done. Every single young person in America watched as President Biden enabled a genocide and you're gonna fucking lose because of it.
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If you are actually partners in life and not people playing house, then you shouldn't be conceptualizing it as "I have 180k, she has 40k". Both of you have 220k together.
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A guy with down syndrome showed up at my door with his aid chasing behind him. Guy said the aid hurt him, and he didn't want to go back with them. I told the aid to call someone else and have them come pick him up, because I wasn't letting them take him.
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The new Argentine president looks like Wolverine from X-Men if his mutation was being a pedophile
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They don't want homeless people concentrating, forming communities, and establishing themselves in one area, because that starts looking less like isolated"bums" and more like a capitalist refugee camp.
NEW: Massive furnished homeless *caves* discovered in California 20 feet below street level.
Insane.
Volunteer groups removed a whopping 7600 pounds of trash and also found guns and drugs.
The caves were so intricate that they had murals, floor tiles and one even had a…
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I'm sorry but she's got his ass. She is in control of his mind now like one of those cordyceps fungi. As men we are powerless against an encouraging belly rub. He would commit arson if she asked.
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Sometimes I like to rewatch a clip of the time Gordon Ramsay went to a Soul Food/Caribbean restaurant on Kitchen Nightmares and found out it wasn't a nightmare, and he instead loved it.
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One problem I've noticed about being an American is that we rarely, if ever, stir giant steaming cauldrons
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This is possibly the worst fitting sweater of all time but he somehow retains a level of confidence rarely achieved by mortals
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A young person being physically restrained by grey haired liberals for daring to ask a perfectly fair question is such a salient metaphor for the current state of the Left
“Jill, when are you and the President going to call for a ceasefire in Gaza?”
Protestors in Arizona disrupt Jill Biden’s speaking event to
#ShutItDown4Palestine
🇵🇸
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I have an uncle that is autistic, and it's wild how all the old people in my family interpret his behavior as super irritating, and the younger 2 generations are just like "yeah, he's just being autistic. It's fine. Leave him alone".
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A gay guy who's whole job is instigating drama between rich glamorous women did cocaine???
Andy Cohen Is Under Fire For Allegedly Doing Blow With 'Housewives' And Playing Favorites
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Using an indentured Indian workforce in your colony when you've annihilated the indigenous population is literally the oldest colonial trick in the book.
𝗜𝘀𝗿𝗮𝗲𝗹 𝗮𝘀𝗸𝘀 𝗜𝗻𝗱𝗶𝗮 𝗳𝗼𝗿 100,000 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸𝗲𝗿𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝗿𝗲𝗽𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗲 𝗣𝗮𝗹𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗶𝗮𝗻𝘀 𝘄𝗵𝗼𝘀𝗲 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗺𝗶𝘁𝘀 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝗰𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗲𝗱 𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗢𝗰𝘁𝗼𝗯𝗲𝗿 7 𝗮𝘁𝘁𝗮𝗰𝗸𝘀
#IsraelHamasWar
#India
#Israel
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Imagine cranking your hog in your Las Vegas hotel room and you look up and the video orb just staring at you like this
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The Democrats are terrified because they know GenZ is waking up!
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This guy was actually reported by the guy he harassed and the police told him they wouldn't do anything. Police only acted when social media pressure forced their hand.
Stuart Seldowitz being taken away in handcuffs for “hate crime/stalking, second-degree aggravated harassment, stalking causing fear, and stalking at employment”
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It's funny that a not insignificant portion of Americans are doing their jobs absolutely zooted out of their minds, hitting a vape pen in the bathroom during their shift, and it's actually completely fine.
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Ok an aid that he likes and seems to trust came and got him. I'm glad he knows I'm down the street if he's in trouble though.
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The same thing happened to me at Kroger, brother
Hi
@sainsburys
your Kensington store manager Marika just refused me access to a bathroom.
Despite presenting this.
I look forward to your response.
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No it isn't 👍🏻
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Why is everyone so indignantly stupid. I would be mortified if I sat in someone else's seat by accident, but dude was defiantly acting like I was being ridiculous.
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It's so funny to me that there is a fine art world for people with taste, but there is also a parallel "stupid art" world that just produces incredibly expensive and stupid shit for rich people who have zero taste.
For an art lover like myself this place looks like a slice of heaven
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I need to know this man and embrace him as a brother
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The stuff going on with Boeing has been happening in every industry for a long time. All of the skilled individuals who actually *do* the job are understaffed and overworked while the administrative class of MBA vampires with email and PowerPoint jobs continues to grow.
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Whenever someone puts music on I say "this is cool, what is it?", even if it isn't cool. Then they tell me about it and like me more as a result. Unclear whether this makes me a sociopathic manipulator or a good friend.
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Now we are chilling on the couch watching Family Guy and drinking La Croixs
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It absolutely rules that in the year 2000, countless Americans turned on NBC to catch SNL and were greeted with this
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It's so funny that zoomers have recontextualized pants that Minnesota farmers would wear to milk cows at 5am as "ultra gay".
oh unfortunately i absolutely need the ultra gay LL bean flannel jeans
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There's no more iconic combo than a messy queen and a psychopathic hot girl
George Santos and Lauren Boebert on the House floor ahead of today's speaker vote.
via
@pennstatetom
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I hate to break it you all, but this is simply the everyday reality of being a robust fat man with a magnetic personality
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Why the fuck did people let companies replace pensions with terrible 401ks. Why was there no backlash to that?Why didn't anyone stop what is abundantly a terrible thing?
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Girlfriend: I sent you the contact info for 3 different therapists.
Boyfriend: *inflating a Jabba the Hutt toy with a garden hose until it explodes* nevermind babe I figured it all out
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These are all incredibly mid pens . Y'all don't know shit about pens
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An insane percentage of this country have extremely poorly managed anxiety disorders that manifest as gastrointestinal distress.
Can someone explain to me the rise of girls talking about having "tummy aches"? There are memes about it and girls wear shirts like this (saw it today). Are modern women eating things that destroy their digestive system, or is this like an infantilism thing?
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No group of humans in history have had less spatial awareness than Boomers piloting carts around Costco like the container ship trapped in the Suez canal
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He heard there was a 16 year old girl who had too much to drink up there
Jared Leto climbed the Empire State Building earlier this morning.
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I absolutely NEED someone to lobotomize me into a DJ Khaled state of perpetual bliss
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I follow this Tik Tok that's just shots of men on the streets of Istanbul and every other guy looks like a supervillain.
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@francisxwolf
Even if that's the case why on earth would he be mad instead of apologetic ???
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I am the same age (35) that Johnny Cash was when this photo was taken. I'm convinced people in the past were like rubbing gravel into their skin to make them look old as hell
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This lady on Tik Tok is currently digging a system of tunnels under her house and her replies ,
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This was 100% my reaction to Indian food the first time I had as a little kid in Iowa
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I am losing my mind at this post on Reddit. Apparently he was mishearing the phrase "nice to meet you".
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The billionaire vampire guy looks like a lesbian who would reawaken your mother's sexuality when she finally divorced your dad
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you can literally see them mixing as it comes out the nozzle? Do you lack eyes?
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We are like 6 months from entire office parks filled with hundreds of girls doing this like the triangle shirtwaist factory
she has this shit down to a science, like she is just so efficient
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When that tax refund hits in a few months
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Guys will see a video like this and be like "hell yeah" in the replies
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Back in the 90's people thought sugar filled fruit juices were good for children. It was beautiful. You were offered a cup of ice cold Juicy Juice wherever you went. Nowadays kids drink Woke Beverages.
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@adequatelyjed
I was an aid as well! Actually worked my way all the way up to caseworker. That was my career before healthcare.
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Me: Beating children is bad for their emotional and cognitive development
150 people in the replies: ,youuuu bitchass my Brrain iis perfectly Fine! Bitchass need beat to make brain work! 🤣🤣🤣
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How the fuck does Long John Silvers keep open more than 500 locations around the country. I have literally never seen or heard of anyone eating here. What is keeping it afloat. What are they hiding?
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Michael Bublé was high on mushrooms the entire time he played in the NHL all-star game and he immediately told everyone afterwards lmao
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Washing your meat simply covers your sink and the surrounding area with bacteria. Meat should go straight from package to pan or cutting board.
"ask me when's the last time I washed my sheets" is exactly why you should wash your chicken. also, look up the constant recalls, health issues, deaths, and more associated with factory farmed chicken. definitely asking too much. nevermind.
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"he cornered me in a really awkward conversation" yes, that's literally his fucking jam. Just drink a beer and calm down about it.
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How is "don't be a dick to autistic people" somehow enchanted secret knowledge inaccessible to people over 50.
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This style of dense housing where all the units face each other with communal walking space in between encouraging chance encounters with your neighbors is actually dope.
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I am beginning to think some people did not follow the rules of lockdown during the pandemic.
could y’all stay in the house for a whole week without stepping a foot outside for $100k?
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Boeing used to be run by engineers. Hospitals used to be run by doctors. Universities used to be run by professors. There is a bloated corporate class sucking the lifeblood out of every institution in this country.
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This picture of a Taliban guy sitting in a Herman Miller Aeron chair got me wondering. Perhaps it takes fighting in the mountains for years to fully appreciate high quality ergonomic office furniture.
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@Vynestra
Democrats and Republicans have approximately the same foreign policy. Maybe if the Dem were interested in winning they would support policies that aren't slightly more polite version of the Republican policy.
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It's way easier to justify our current economic system of exploitation if we dehumanize its most abject sufferers.
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One of the worst takes. Boxer briefs are by far the best designed underwear.
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The thing Millennials did that would be horrifying to Gen Z kids is upload literally dozens of unedited uncurated pictures of themselves drinking to Facebook every Sunday morning
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One time my mom was dealing with some pain and directed my dad to try and find weed in my room. He managed to find some, and apparently my mom got so high she could only lay in bed and have my dad bring her snacks. It didn't occur to them it was stronger than it was in 1983.
a moment of silence for this particularly disappointing shelf in my bedroom at my parents house
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taking out Jabba's Sail Barge from Star Wars with a couple coolers of ice old beers and some bluntts would go crazy hard right now
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Dudes rock so hard sometimes I get choked up 🥹
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This is honestly offensive to bald guys. William doesn't have bald energy. He looks like a guy who had beautiful hair and lost it in a terrible accident.
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Maybe I'm sounding like a freaking anarchist but it is not the job of the state to teach rizz to dumb guys
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I just figured out if you search for a classic guitar pedal on Spotify, people have made entire playlists featuring that particular pedal
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Me in 3rd grade coming in to school late because I had a dentist appointment
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GTA style It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia video game where you can play as any of the gang and have to complete increasingly upsetting and preposterous missions.
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God there's something about comically oversized articles of clothing that tickles me deeply
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If AI is bad then why does this picture of Bobby Hill having a tea ceremony with nomads in the desert go so hard?
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Lmao Wiley Coyote ass problem
WHAT A MESS! Homes in Montana were buried under tumbleweed as some piles rose so high that they flowed over the roofs of homes.
#mtwx
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In 8th grade I refused to do the pledge of allegiance because I was "protesting" the invasion of Iraq and my 65 year old wood shop teacher got so mad he wouldn't talk to us the rest of class
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This is a lot of sodium for a toddler meal, but we literally have no reason to believe they eat this every meal. Also she included 2 fresh fruits. If people want her to shop at whole foods and give her kids quinoa they should pay for that or stfu.
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Look what they did to my husky boy
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The people in the replies to this post shouldn't be allowed to vote or have drivers licenses
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