I just want to get back to a place in life where all I care about is watching the Muppets at 630 during dinner time. Fuck these bills & work & relationships . I mean you guys are cool.

RT @memetazaa: all women do is give you boners and make you wanna die.

Why does it feel like knowing how to cook a breakfast like this is an act of rebellion…

RT @Rachel_7492:

Owning a Tesla Truck is this current generation’s 70s male perm & polyester leisure suit. 30 years from now people will say . ‘YOU actually drove that thing in public?’.

I grew up middle class but if we wanted something we had to work for it. For instance, my first car at 16 was named ‘Oh Fuck You Car’ for how much I paid for it: $500, and for its tendency to die at stoplights, hence the name….

Woke up horny and afraid again….

When I’m happy yes….

If Facebook had a *Balls Deep in Some Biscuits & Gravy* status. that’s what I’d be putting rn.

My favorite Bruce Springsteen song is ‘Glory Hole’.

Hey baby, meet me at the front door or back door of love, doesn’t matter to me. 😜

CURSE YOU TEMU CONDOMS!!!!.

RT @BobGolen: What other mountain fluids would make a good soda pop?.

RT @krezae: If you get cremated after you die you can be put into an hour glass and still participate in family game nights.

RT @soonergirlpod: You tell em QT!

RT @lippyent: In Ohio, it's Pop! What do you call this where you're from? Hmm 🤔 ?¿

RT @jzux: wtf is an "urgent email." stop making stuff up.

It’s Friday, show her it’s real by bringing her a 2 piece and a biscuit….

RT @Jacq_inabox: helen hunt but only when helen hungry.

RT @s4m31p4n: You’re telling me this ford escaped.