Andy Staples
@Andy_Staples
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Covering college football @On3sports . Subscribe: . Instagram: andy_staples.
Joined January 2009
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Pinned Tweet
This is how Dante Miller’s story started.
Today, he has a Columbia bachelor’s degree, a South Carolina master’s degree (and another on the way) and he just signed this morning with the New York Giants.
How he got there is as amazing as you’d imagine.
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ESPN sources tell ESPN that ESPN might continue to broadcast the playoff on ESPN.
Sources: CFP, ESPN discussing new deal that would give ESPN control of College Football Playoff rights for the next eight seasons. Story w/
@CFBHeather
on what the final two seasons of current deal and next six years would look like.
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Hear our cries,
@EASPORTS
.
@Andy_Staples
I plead with you. Start the petition to get these bowl mascots as available skins in the new College Football video game. Playing as a team of mascots was always fun but Pop Tarts vs Jars of Mayonnaise would be the dream.
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As I lay my head on the pillow following championship Saturday, I’ll think only of this: Lane Kiffin is a head coach in the SEC again because a guy pretended to pee like a dog on the field.
God bless America.
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D.J. Burns: Double me so I can go Magic Johnson.
Texas Tech: No.
D.J. Burns: Double me so I can go Jokic.
Texas Tech: No.
D.J. Burns: BABY HOOK
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Trevor is dead on here. Cancel football, and a lot of players wind up returning to situations that aren’t as safe as they are currently.
If the schools would just drop the charade and cut some checks, they could bubble them and play. But they won’t do that.
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Someone really just asked Gus Malzahn, former Auburn coach, if he understood what kind of pressure cooker he’s walking into at UCF.
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Amazing what happens when everyone at two schools handles a coaching change like grown-ups. UCF gets a huge win, and Nebraska got a three-hour infomercial for Scott Frost’s coaching.
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What’s weirder than the news tonight that the now-suspended Michigan staffer accused of a sign-stealing operation bought tickets to Alabama, Clemson Georgia and Tennessee games in 2022?
A
@Volquest_On3
poster dropped the dime on all this in December.
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You don't need to show the overtime rules graphic, ESPN. The casual fan is long gone. We're all friends here.
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Those poor soccer players have no idea what they’re getting themselves into trying to do something outdoors in early August in Columbia, S.C.
Bless their hearts.
South Carolina has announced that Manchester United will play Liverpool at Williams-Brice Stadium on Aug. 3, part of a preseason tour for the clubs.
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How many SEC titles, though?
Norway, with a population less than the Atlanta metro area, has four golds and 10 total medals so far at the Olympics. The US has seven medals and one gold.
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Notre Dame has two undefeated regular seasons since 2012. Texas has lost to TCU seven times since 2012. Probably shouldn’t put Texas and ND in the same sentence.
Texas is entering into Notre Dame levels of overrated
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This is what all those idiots spent more than 100 years trying to block…
Here is KU football walk-on Jared Casey's acting debut for
@Applebees
: "Hey, you always gotta go for two."
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This, right here, is why we love this stupid sport so much.
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1. College sports will still have a governing body. Ain't nobody trying to throw their own softball tournament.
2. If you remove the rule that bans a thing, doing that thing isn't cheating.
3. You can still have rules about academic eligibility.
I’m not arguing for or against college athlete endorsements, but this is what comes with it: 1. The end of the NCAA, 2. Fewer rules, more cheating, 3. Complete professionalization of college sports — players won’t be tied to academics, likely won’t need to go to class.
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About like everyone else’s. But glad you feel superior to an entire region of the country.
But you know what they say. When you can get a football-related zinger on Twitter in where the punchline is the number of hospitalizations and deaths, you just have to do it.
Many SEC fans wanted their states and their economy open and their right to not wear a mask. How’s your football season looking, guys?
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If Grand Canyon University can create the biggest party in college basketball out of thin air, your school has no excuse for putting on boring basketball games.
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Also, playing Dixieland Delight, a song about truck sex that takes place in Tennessee that is beloved by Alabama fans, is an especially salty touch.
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There is football on every night from now until the Monday after Thanksgiving. We truly live in the most wonderful of times.
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We charted QB Jaden Rashada’s recruitment from his discovery to his Miami commitment to a since-terminated $13.85 million deal to go to Florida.
It’s a tour through the untamed world of recruiting in the NIL era.
The contract is especially eye-popping.
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Reminder: The FCS transfer QB who has helped South Carolina to a 20-point lead against Florida does a spot-on Bobby Boucher and a spot-on Roberto Boucher.
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Pac-12 commish George Kliavkoff calls scheduling college football games 12 years in advance "insane." He hopes the Alliance members can create an inter-conference challenge format where dates get saved and non-conference games get scheduled the preceding January.
PLEASE DO THIS
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Mike Leach had a law degree but never practiced law.
He had strong opinions about shrunken heads, ancient military tactics and cargo shorts.
He also changed the way nearly everyone at every level of football plays offense.
Goodbye to one of one.
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Ty Jerome on Carsen Edwards: “That was the best performance I’ve ever seen.”
Kyle Guy: “I’ve never witnessed anything like that.”
Tony Bennett: “He made me rip my play card in half.”
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“Jacksonville technically is a big city, land-wise.”
— Trevor Lawrence, who apparently was briefed about the whole square-mileage thing.
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Quinn Ewers looks like that guy in town who can get you the hood for the 88 Firebird you’re restoring at a very fair price.
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Six QBs in the first 12 picks. Holy cow are so many people going to get fired.
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Greatest draft announcement ever.
(Look up the Bible verse.)
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Kirby Smart makes his case to the playoff selection committee.
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YOUR OXEN HAVE DIED
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Never forget whose fault it is that there isn’t a 12-team playoff this year.
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Imagine it's December 2017. UCF is undefeated. USC has just won the Pac-12.
You walk up to a random college football fan and say this: "The last straw for Scott Frost at Nebraska will be losing to Clay Helton's Georgia Southern team."
Does that person call the cops?
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Don’t be the person who is too snobby for Cheesecake Factory or Chili’s or Texas Roadhouse.
I promise you it impresses a lot fewer people than you think it does.
@Andy_Staples
Andrew I've been reading you for decades.
All the food you've eaten, all the joints you've eaten at, the fact that you'd go to Cheesecake Factory saddens me.
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Bless your heart if you think that’s acceptable brisket.
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Enjoying
@finebaum
explaining to a caller that Nick Saban doesn’t do the Aflac commercials live and that he isn’t spending more time on that than before.
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I’m a little late for the How It Started/How It’s Going thing, but two years later, it’s going with significantly less blubber.
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Quick HIPAA tutorial:
If your doctor tells someone your medical info, that is a HIPAA violation.
When your agent tells someone your medical info, it is not.
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Heisman voting opens today. Don’t vote today. Don’t vote tomorrow. Wait until after the games get finished Saturday. It’s not that difficult.
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My brother-in-law wins. He made most of this with 3D printers and then sanded and painted it.
This is the way...
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If you didn’t write a pearl-clutching I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU MONSTERS ARE TRYING TO PLAY FOOTBALL IN A PANDEMIC column when Sun Belt teams were shifting games around, I’m disinclined to take your thoughts seriously when you do it now that LSU, Florida and Nick Saban are in the mix.
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No. They beat Auburn.
Just when we think Mississippi State is crumbling, they beat a top-10 team.
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This might be a good time to remind everyone that Arkansas has a TON of money — especially when certain big donors are motivated.
I feel like that’s not something most of the general public realizes.
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An oral history of oral histories:
"So I was sitting there thinking 'I've got a bunch of good quotes and I'm bad at writing transitions.'"
-- Andy Staples, Sports Illustrated
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Jim Harbaugh is asked if the national title game might be his last at Michigan.
Harbaugh: “My future consists of a happy flight back to ANN ARBOR MICHIGAN.”
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Other than when he picks the Dukes, every pick should be "I'm gonna take Barstool Van Talk here, Rece."
Excited to announce this week's guest picker: Pardon My Take and JMU's very own
@PFTCommenter
👏
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Jalen Hurts being legit ticked about that performance should terrify everyone in the Big 12.
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So 1992 Ohio State-Wisconsin is on, and Barry Alvarez is about to give the rest of the condo board 60 minutes of hell.
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Phillip Fulmer introduced as Tennessee's SEC legend. Huge boos from Alabama and Georgia fans. Huge smile on Fulmer's face.
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I didn’t say I was OK with it. I said they have good reason to dislike your school and that I wouldn’t be surprised by if they cranked the petty to maximum levels.
I’ve said this before, but if you’re this sensitive, you’re REALLY going to hate being in the SEC.
@Andy_Staples
I recognize your job is to get clicks and engagements so I am hopeful this is just a poor attempt at that because if a national writer is ok with the league purposely sabotaging games because they are mad a school made the best decision for themselves then it’s just shameful.
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Lanning is going to get downright Spurrier-esque if Oregon starts competing for national titles.
Has that same twinkle in his eye.
Here's what Dan Lanning had to say about the outrage about his pregame speech and Skip Bayless
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The Florida State thing is fascinating.
It's easy to say "It's too expensive to get out of the ACC." And it would be VERY expensive.
But being $30 million-$40 million per year behind the schools you recruit against for 13 years is also incredibly expensive in its own way.
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A fan base rose up and said it didn't want to buy the football program its school intended to sell. On Tennessee, Greg Schiano and listening to your customers.
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Explain credit default swaps.
If the Arkansas coach took his shirt off, what is the Princeton coach gonna do?
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Because he decided to stay at Missouri?
Man, Drew Lock is so good. Tell me why he’s not an NFL starter
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Statement from ACC commissioner Jim Phillips (who you’ll recall is one of the three people responsible for there not being a 12-team CFP this year)
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So I have a new job.
I really wanted to say NO INTERVIEWS — RESPECT MY DECISION.
But please, interview me. I’ll tell you why I took a new job
@TheAthletic
and why you should spend less than a latte a month to read the planet’s best sportswriting.
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If someone owed me $10.25 million in 29 days or less, the last thing I’m worrying about is my Twitter profile. I’m on Zillow deciding what island to buy.
Pretty interesting that we haven't seen a statement from Gus Malzahn yet. Hasn't changed his Twitter profile yet either.
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It’s LSU. It’s not close.
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Just remember, when you quote tweet the person who is obviously posting that just to rile you up, you are now literally making that person money.
Just a thought.
And now, I present my list of the 10 worst college football fanbases…
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It’s not a debate at all, because the market has spoken. They are profitable ventures for television networks, and therefore there will be as many as the market will bear.
If you don’t like them, watch Wheel of Fortune.
If this year has taught us anything it’s this: 42 bowl games is too many. It’s not even a debate at this point.
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The watch party up in heaven with Mike Leach and Jimmy Buffett is going to be a banger.
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An Uber to a place with passable fries.
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I hate reality shows and I would 1000 percent watch a Lane Kiffin reality show.
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Someone seeing my LSU tailgating story and saying “Haven’t been to [insert NFL team] tailgate, have you” is like if I recommend Ruth’s Chris and they say “Haven’t been to a Burger King, have you?”
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200 people, standing in front of a stadium that draws 105,000 on game day, is in force? I don’t think that phrase means what you think it means, USA Today social person.
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Truly enjoying the NOW THE BIG TEN MAY BE HANDLING THIS BETTER THAN ANYONE takes.
No. They messed up. It’s cool that they admitted their mistake instead of letting pride get in the way. And that, in and of itself, is a very good thing.
Now on to actual football.
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This Schiano/Tennessee thing is so weird.
Fans: We hate this because of X.
Traditional media types (yes, I know I am one): Nah, this is totally cool.
John Currie is probably better off listening to his fans than to us. They buy tickets. We don’t.
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Jim Harbaugh and Kalen DeBoer get asked about the food in Houston and of course haven’t eaten outside their hotels.
But this is a fine time to post the pics from my dinner at
@PinkertonsBBQ
last night.
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It’s unfortunate Clemson-Florida State had to be postponed, but when the team that could lose by 50 is still trying to reschedule the game, it isn’t the team that’s ducking somebody. (No matter what one of the coaches says.)
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French people do know fine cuisine when they see it.
The first Popeyes in Paris (and France) opened a few weeks ago, Boulevard de Denain across from Gare du Nord, and I haven’t been yet bc the line is always out the door when I pass by.
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Alternate translation:
You're going to get the video game back.
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Why wouldn’t the SEC/ACC/Big 12 administrators just say “You made your choices and are now backtracking. If you’d like to play with us, here’s how we’re doing it. Otherwise, by all means, just keep doing your own thing and see how that works out.”
Wouldn't the SEC/ACC/Big 12 fans rather start a few weeks later and get back on same page with Big Ten and (presumably) Pac-12?
One season starting at Thanksgiving, push back the CFP and make the recruiting calendar all in sync.
Then all of us get that CFB buzz back TOGETHER!
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Sen. Kolkhorst to Jay Hartzell:
“3-7 against the Horned Frogs. Maybe your fanbase would rather lose to Alabama than TCU.”
(This roast is not on Comedy Central, though.)
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A different winner isn’t the point. More fanbases engaged down the stretch and more interesting games in the early rounds are the idea.
A 12 team playoff has benefits but we aren’t getting a different winner than a 4 team playoff.
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The best tailgating is LSU. Again, it’s not close.
@travhaney
@Andy_Staples
Best tailgating game is Florida/Georgia. Sadly, Florida/Georgia has one of the worst in stadium environments. It doesn’t match what it’s like outside the stadium.
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Baker Mayfield, who either will be throwing at pro day or competing in the All-Valley Karate Championship.
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I can still think of one established Power Five coach with a history of winning in tough places to win who would take the Tennessee job. But they have to be smart enough to offer it to him.
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Ready for Coastal Carolina to volunteer to play a 14th game so the Chants can ride in and save the Gator Bowl.
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We don’t. I don’t really care if you care. It’s my Twitter feed, and I’ll populate it how I please. You can follow it or not.
@Andy_Staples
Bigger picture: why do sports writers think we care what they think about food, music, movies, etc.?
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When you think you’re making an April Fool’s joke and you accidentally come up with an incredible idea.
BREAKING: The US Open to add puppies to the ballperson team at the 2019 tournament for the first time.
All breeds welcome.
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The kickoff is the most dangerous play in football. Attempts to make it safer have killed returns. But last week, the XFL introduced a kickoff that is simultaneously safer and less boring.
It needs to be adopted in college and in the NFL immediately.
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Listen, 21-year-old me would have attacked a pile of Wendy's singles and Whoppers.
But, for next time, if you need to feed a huge group on a budget and you want to make everyone happy: Chick-fil-a. Always Chick-fil-a.
Unless it's Sunday. Then it's Popeyes.
There. You're done.
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Jalen Hurts to Oklahoma, which makes perfect sense. Why wouldn't you go to the place where the past two starting QBs have won the Heisman Trophy?
So now Oklahoma should let Austin Kendall play at West Virginia next year. No need to be petty.
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It tastes waaaaay better than not eating it.
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Michigan statement:
A statement from the University of Michigan:
"Like all members of the Big Ten Conference, we are entitled to a fair, deliberate, and thoughtful process to determine the full set of facts before a judgment is rendered. Today’s action by Commissioner Tony…
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This is the sort of thing me and
@InTheBleachers
are talking about when we say some people have zero understanding of how good pro athletes are.
(And make-an-NBA-roster good might be the best good of any major sport.)
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The family left me alone to watch football all day, so I made lunch.
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Hear me out.
Notre Dame, Stanford, Cal, Army, Navy, Air Force
That's your conference. Sell it to NBC. ND has to take less, but ND has been taking less for years at this point. Army-Navy is a massive TV property. Those are teams that teams in other leagues would schedule OOC.
ND AD Jack Swarbrick told me the reason they advocated for Cal and Stanford was because “The notion that two of the very best academic institutions in the world who also play D1 sports could be abandoned in this latest chapter of realignment is an indictment of college athletics.
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