Zuha Malik
@zoemalyk_giggle
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A postmodernist feminist who loves to read and write poetry. #gettherapy #getemployed Pronouns: she/her category: cis-het
Joined March 2014
I know that life is vast, unpredictable, beautiful, and scary. 🌊. But I also know that Allah loves me. I know that Allah has a plan for me. And iA, one day, it will all make sense. For that day, for today, for yesterday, and for all days, all I have to say is Alhamdulillah. 💕.
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Please stop asking Pakistani armed forces to retaliate right now. They've just intercepted 25 drones in less than 15 hours. As people who have never studied politics and IR, you guys clearly don't know what that means.
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It's my independence anniversary. July 2nd 2022 is the day I left my abusive home. It took me weeks of planning and months -- perhaps years -- of mental preparation. Ever since I jumped out of a moving car and got on a rickshaw with a bleeding nose, I have been 100% on my own.
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Am I literally the only person on the internet who appreciates PAF uncle but isn't sexually attracted to him?.
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The fact that Pak Fauj did not retaliate at any time before this shows that they REALLY know what they're doing. We're in good hands. Pak Fauj, we are by your side.
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If Zakir Naik had just said, "My sister, I'm sorry that you've experienced this in your society. This is not the teaching of Islam. Shaitan comes and tempts even Muslims to commit immorality and some will fall for it", none of us would be out here roasting him right now.
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Honestly, I don't care who you are or where you come from. If you aren't making at least Rs 50K/month while living in Pakistan, hit me up I'll revamp your resume for free. Get employed. Please. Halaat buht kharaab hein.
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Okay I think it's finally time to talk about the sihr (black magic) that was done on me some time ago 🧵:.
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I'm in DHA Phase 1 Lahore. I've heard two blasts at a distance.
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I had a very traumatic childhood. When I was four, my father banged my head into the corner of the bed. When I was five, he beat me across the entire town. I was running home and he would follow me and say threateningly, "Aa raha hoon mein".
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How to Write A Resume That Gets You Hired Abroad [Pakistan] 🧵. After my recent thread about getting employed, a whole lot of you sent me your resumes. I'd like to clarify that I'm not a recruiter but rather a former career development specialist. And here's how I can help:.
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Dear rape survivors who heard that horrible statement,. You are purer than the angels that hold the Almighty's throne together. You are cleaner than the zam zam that Muslims drink. If you had ever sinned, that creature took it away with him when he left. You did nothing wrong.
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It's confirmed. @foodpanda_pk doesn't roll out the tips we add to our orders for the riders. I've asked multiple riders and even a friend who works in the restaurant business. This is disgusting. How could a platform this big pocket what's supposed to be paid to its employees?.
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Met a cool girl my age at the Daewoo terminal in KHI. She asked if I could share my seat with her. Now that I was looking at her up close, I could see that she was a bit upset. She only needed to get to Hyderabad. Daewoo was charging her 3.5K for the ticket 1/x.
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Who tf asks a woman to take off her clothing in a public place and gets away it? Oh, right. Our mullahs.
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How to Deal With Harassers 🧵. I've been taking bykeas ever since I came to Karachi because .A. It's very economical and .B. When you tip a bykea guy, you're effectively giving them money for a meal. And in this economy, that's a huge relief.
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Uhhh guys? Guys! Reciting istighfaar actually works I just witnessed a miracle earlier today.
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How I got regular in namaz again after a 2-year break 🧵:.
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gentle reminder that in 2017 as a 20 year old fresh grad when my father beat me up and give me death threats I told him to fuck off and graffiti-ed Maya Angelou's "Still I Rise" on every wall except his bedroom so he had to get the house repainted.
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Alright, guys. Here it is. My official 2nd independence anniversary: exactly two years since I made my way to the Daewoo terminal with a bloody nose on a rickshaw. I've already told you the story of the nafl I offered before leaving. I've already told you all to trust God.
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How to Deal with Rishta Stress 🧵. Believe it or not, I was engaged once. My parents effected the arrangement without telling me b/c apparently I nikalofied "keeras" in every single rishta. I just walked into the drawing room and everyone started hugging and congratulating me.
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I left my parents' house because after almost 25 years, I was beginning to develop Stockholm syndrome. It's when you, after years of resistance, mentally accept your fate because some part of you deep down thinks that this is all you deserve.
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I've been watching Dolly Ki Ayegi Baraat because I wanted some light comedy and instead it's making me realize how much of a feminist movement the entertainment industry was furthering 15 years back.
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And this what makes you susceptible to energy vampires -- men who prey on women. Men who like to devour their self esteem. I had a painful childhood. But I also have a brilliant therapist. I absolutely cannot believe how he has helped me.
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The decision was not easy. But it was necessary to make. I used to think that it was necessary for me, but I've come to realize that it was necessary for history. I'm not the only woman in this country who has left an abusive home in the pursuit of her mental peace, but the way -.
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I'm currently ghostwriting an autobiography of a woman who was raped by her stepfather from the time that she was five to the time that she was seventeen. And NOBODY -- not even her own mother and aunt -- did anything at all about it. She did the brave thing at 17 and moved out -.
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I absolutely cannot believe how I always kept finding kind people who helped me out. Thank you so much, Allah Taala.
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It's taken me 1.5 years after leaving to start the real phase of my healing. The phase that will erase all the issues once and for all. Therapy is time-taking. You need both a psychologist and a psychiatrist. But you can do it. You can get better. I know that I'll be okay one day.
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It's important to share this because I know there's a girl out there somewhere about to end her life because her family is abusive and no one believes her. She needs to know she has a future.
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I am so incredibly grateful that in this economy, I have a well-paying job. I have friends who take INCREDIBLE care of me. I am never hungry. I am never wanting. I live in Karachi which, despite the API levels, is chaotically beautiful, vibrant, and rich. I am so grateful.
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Why I unmatched with a guy that I had been talking to on bumble on three days later and why all girls need to be vigilant about these signs 🧵:.
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that I'm playing my cards terrifies most men, wreaks havoc, and is intended to be constructive for the future of history.
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A Guide for How To Deal With Women On Their Period [Men] 🧵. A friend of mine asked me to do this today.
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I understand the need for profitability and business and also the emerging fuel costs. I know Daewoo didn't make many sales today cuz I've been tracking their available seats on the app since morning. But this is downright insensitive.
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I've done something that few dare to do and it's taken me all this time to realize that this battle against the patriarchy that I have become a part of need be executed way more strategically. Already, with everything that I do and every interaction that I make, I am challenging.
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The first time I was physically harassed on the street, I was shocked I got scared. The second time someone attempted it, I yelled at him so hard I'm sure he peed himself. My reflexes are getting stronger. If anyone ever does this again, I'm going to beat them up.
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Here's the reason reciting istighfaar causes miracles 🧵:.
Uhhh guys? Guys! Reciting istighfaar actually works I just witnessed a miracle earlier today.
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I onv went out with a Sindhi wadera (not my fault ok his bumble was cool) and back then I didn't know much about the wadera system so I asked him what he did and he told me he was a FARMER. Naturally, my next question was whether he studied agriculture and he LEGIT MADE UP -.
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It's very scary to live on your own. You never stop missing your family and sometimes hours exhausted and depleted. But Elizabeth Gilbert once said, "I've come to believe that there exists in the universe something I call "The Physics of The Quest" —.
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I've always believed that harassers and rapists don't operate out of lust. They operate out of fear of you and their consequently desire to intimidate you. How dare you, a woman, exit your house? How dare you be seen in public?.
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I just wanna say - in this economy, I have a roof over my head, I have two jobs, both of which have a good environment, and I have friends who care for me and look after me. I am unbelievably blessed and I don't understand how I can ever sufficiently express my gratitude to God.
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And anyone who feels suicidal can email jo@samaritans.org . They helped me before I could afford a therapist.
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Guy at cafe asks me yeh kaunsi cigarette hai aapke paas? I'm like it's Malboro gold (any smoker would know, it's pretty obvs). He offers to pay for one. I'm like aap ese hi le lein. Boy tries to light a cigarette INSIDE McD's. I'm like bhai baahir jaa ke karein 1/x.
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When I got on the bus from Lahore to Karachi on the day after this last year, I was viscerally terrified; I'd abandoned everything that I knew. And I'm astonished at how much love and support has been given to me by the universe since then. There have been tough days but.
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a force of nature governed by laws as real as the laws of gravity or momentum. And the rule of Quest Physics maybe goes like this: "If you are brave enough to leave behind everything familiar and comforting (which can be anything from your house to your bitter old resentments).
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the way that the world -- particularly our little corner of the world -- is being run. But it will be done much more purposefully now.
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Alsoooo if you recite the 7 manzils of Qur'an in 7 days, starting after Fajr and ending before maghrib every day (and reciting durud Ibrahimi 11× before and after each round of recitation), you'll energetically vibrate at such a high frequency that nothing will stand in your way.
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I see 12 to 15 year old boys trying to catcall me when I visit the park by my home. I typically ignore them but I think they need one good chamaat so that they'd understand early on that there's consequences to this.
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Guys, I have news: a month ago, my therapist asked me, "So when are you quitting smoking?". I looked shiftily about and mumbled something reluctantly. He said, "matleb long-term plans mein hai?". Since that day, I haven't been able to smoke ciggies. I just hate them. And today -.
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Every single moment has led me to this one. I'm trying to learn about life. I'm trying to learn about myself.
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and set out on a truth-seeking journey (either externally or internally), and if you are truly willing to regard everything that happens to you on that journey as a clue, and if you accept everyone you meet along the way as a teacher,.
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and if you are prepared – most of all – to face (and forgive) some very difficult realities about yourself. then truth will not be withheld from you." ".
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quit a job that was getting toxic and immediately heard back from two places that I'd applied to weeks ago. Eckhart Tolle says that when we want something better in our lives, we have to first create space for it. The truth.
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The saddest part about watching Tan Man Neel o Neel, for me, was realizing how much privilege benefits us. I protested the calligraphy lynching by wearing a Manto shawl for a month. And, recently, when I found myself in a situation where someone more powerful than me gave me.
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These guys were using Chris Voss's negotiation tactics. Helpless denial. I told them look she's a girl at a bus station this late at night. If God forbid something were to happen to her, you'd be answerable to God. They denied it.
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So when people tell me that men find me intimidating, I'm like valid hai bro. I am not to be fucked with.
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I don't understand Pakistani Twitter. When Abdullah asked for help finding his Masters, you guys lambasted him ruthlessly. When a bechaara person mentioned that they were worried they wouldn't get an admission because of their GPA and I told them that there's evidence to support-.
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I don't blame him; see what's out there. I took careems back then all the time. But when I told one of my male friends, he gave me a pocket knife and showed me how to use it. "Poke the pointy bit in his back," he said, "And say 'seedha chalaa'".
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Bhaagi nahi. Baap ki ankhon mein ankhein daal ke nikli. IG Police Punjab se phone pe baat bhi ki. Ussko bhi bataya ke I've left of my volition and that he can drop the search operation.
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The most common question that people have been DM-ing me so far is: I can't find a job, what do I do? . The answer: Mass apply. And by mass, I mean 40 applications per day. I mean sending your resume to all of your friends and asking them to put the word out there.
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Since I was taking a sleeper, I thought she could squeeze in with me for 2 hours, no problem. The management wouldn't allow it. She argued with them for a full 15m before breaking down. They wouldn't let her share my seat. I decided to talk to them.
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The characters are everyday people who genuinely fall in love and get married. The corporate boss is a divorced woman. The nano is a matriarch. And Sila's parents are couple goals. Every woman on the show is bold and out there.
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How to Get Employed [Pakistan] 🧵. As a former career development specialist, I come across all sorts of highly qualified people complaining about the job market.
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The Premium We Pay for Being A Woman? [Pakistan]🧵. When I originally declared that I wanted to move out, my therapist recommended I get a scholarship and go abroad. But I didn't want to do that. I wanted to explore Pakistan. I wanted to see what this country had to offer.
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How to Spot A Toxic/Abuse Person 🧵. I had a discussion with a friend of mine last night about how to identify abusers. It's because I've observed a general pattern with most of them, but my friend said I was sticking to this pattern based off confirmation bias.
“I hate men who are afraid of women's strength.”. — Anaïs Nin, Henry and June: From the Unexpurgated Diary of Anaïs Nin
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I told the guys at the reception that I didn't mind sharing my seat. It was a sleeper -- two girls could easily sit on the bed. The argument that the management had was, "how can we give one seat to two passengers?". I told them she was short on cash and srsly needed help.
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As a disciple and follower of Maula Ali and AhleBait, I am sorry that I resorted to such extreme vituperation when faced with the stress of handling the operation I was (and am) running. I am human, make frequent mistakes, and have a lot to learn.
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I asked them if one of them could drop her off to one of the more affordable local bus stations. The man just stared. Then the girl left.
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I implore you to believe survivors. I implore you to check on people around you. We shouldn't have to struggle alone. This woman climbed up from this quicksand from a singular act of kindness. Make that act of kindness please.
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Regarding how difficult it is to find a good mental health practitioner in Pakistan, my ex-husband forced me to go to Shehla Alvi by gaslighting me into believing that I was the problem in our relationship. My own therapist was, at that time, on vacation.
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As hard as I possibly could. He looked confused so I did it again and told him never to look a girl in the eye again. He ran away and I threw his helmet at him. Both of my exes in this city hated that I took bykea rides. One of them expressly 'forbade' me from doing it.
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And this woman bravely tells her story. She broke down multiple times on the phone. And yet she continued to tell her story. She feels that by doing so, she'll empower others to leave abusive men like she did when she divorced her ex. She's trying to focus on positives.
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Nazar and sihr is real. Please protect yourself against it.
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Me: logs into my banking app. my email: hi, you just logged into your banking app. my phone: u've just logged into ur banking app . a scroll on a dove on my windowsill: you just logged into your banking app.
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I feel like there's this huge glorification of an overseas guy in desi households. It took me 6 months of therapy to realize that the anxiety and panic that I was in was because I was engaged to the wrong person.
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- that you can get in without a good GPA as long as the rest of your application is solid, you guys began roasting me. It's as though you don't want people to get better and do better. You want them to stay stuck and not try for thing because of perceived obstacles.
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but didn't have resources because she'd dropped out of high school. So she stayed in a shelter home. When she was 18, a stranger helped her until she got up on her feet.
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Guys, thank you for the overwhelming response on my tweet yesterday. I now have 800+ resumes to overhaul. I'd like to request volunteers for two things:.1. People who can help me check the resumes. 2. People who can hold online upskilling/training classes for these people.
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@zultansultan in that case, you should go out in public with a veil on your face. Your beauty in your best form is for her to see 😊.
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Be still and quietly whisper to yourself the only prayer you'll ever need, "Thank you. Thank you. Thank you." ~ Adrienne Mischler x Oprah 💕.
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She has brought herself even though nobody -- NOBODY -- was there for her. She was homeless for most of her life. Oh wow. What a woman. What an incredible human being.
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Step Four: . De-prioritize love and marriage. We've been spoonfed the idea that women stay in glittering palaces, don pretty dresses, and are dependent upon men. Embrace calling the shots in your life, being independent, screwing up, starting over again, and being brave. 1/2.
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I shot it back and started giving him directions, this time very rudely. When I finally came to my drop-off, I got off the bike, asked the guy about the fare (in a scarily loud and angry voice), and then took his helmet (which he hadn't worn). I smashed it in his head.
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I was a little scared of taking a bykea back home at this hour. Almost ordered a cab but the @inDrive app was glitching. This bike guy was so nice, he waited until I was safely inside God bless.
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A How-To Guide for Bumble [Pakistani Men] 🧵. A friend of mine and I recently started a bumble profile-optimization service business. Our joint profile got blocked because apparently too many people reported us and it's against bumble's policies to use the app for solicitation.
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Step One: . Start working early (I started at 17). This way, by the time you're 25, you'll be earning enough to sustain yourself. Prioritize Upwork and Up2Staff. The Pakistani job market is effed.
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Bumble is supposed to be an app to help grown individuals meet, connect, and hopefully get into a happy relationship with other people. Pakistani men have turned it into a hookup app. 🤦🏻♀️.
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A friend once told me, "Kabhi rizq ki fikar nahi kerni. Apna kaam kero aur rizq Khuda pe chor do (never worry about sustenance; do your bit & leave the rest up to God)" and I try to remind myself of this every time I'm constrained financially. Somehow, something always works out.
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If Foodpanda was in the right, I'd have received a legal notice by now. I'm not afraid. The first thing I did when I started living alone was get a deadass lawyer. Blocking me instead of giving me a call should prove everything. It's not like my number's not public.
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And I felt a weight lift off me as the creature vanished. I dozed off for a couple of hours. When I woke up I had received not one, not two, but THREE job offers. I accepted one of them. After almost 3 months of nothing, this happened.
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I was today years old when I found out that Pakistani people think a "date" means sex????? 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️.A date means a meeting with someone. Like a coffee shop. A restaurant. A bookstore. A park. Oh God.
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Guys, it's not rocket science. There's a link on my X profile to a WhatsApp group where you share your CV in a specific format. Please don't DM me this question. Itna tou aap log khud bhi dekh sakte ho yaar.
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