A man’s first ever tear rolls down his cheek as his girlfriend asks to do his makeup. “This is it”, he thought. “She’s going to castrate me with a dull knife and make soup out of my giant, manly testicles- laughing maniacally as she secretly feeds it to all my homies.”

Uhhhhhhhhh hi

love is love

life imitates art

Before leaving her apartment in Kiev she plays the piano for the last time..

wtf western dental do to this man 😭

to lack an open mind is to lack intelligence

I often get labia mixed up with uvula

I suspected I had covid 5-6 months ago and lost the entirety of my smell and taste. My senses gradually went back to normal, but after 3-4 months everything started having a very particular, rancid taste. 3 months & counting with this bullshit. I’m going fucking insane.

why was windowlicker by aphex twin such an ironic bop 8 years ago? why is it STILL A BOP?

Star Tribune, Minneapolis, Minnesota, October 9, 1921

today’s wordle has me wet as fuck

I wanna smooch whoever DJ’s radio Boise at 2am

https://t.co/BdzOfaRVdv

dumping a cooler of gatorade on my grandma when she says bingo

like it’s honestly offensive that “gluten free” needs to be plastered onto alcohol and every other blatantly obvious gluten-free product

I love how America has just treated us like we’re stupid for so long that we just became stupid

Let’s suck Brandon off

“I’m a top” “I’m a bottom” i am the egg man. i am the walrus

@h3h3productions take that @RyanKavanaugh