Jess (sticker enthusiast)
@unkahnventional
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Cracked open a cold one with the boys n they asked if I’m butch. 🏳️🌈🖖🤎🧡🤍🩷❤️ Jewish antizionist.
Joined November 2015
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now the remaining question is how old do I have to be before people start thinking of me as Regular Sheldon instead of Young Sheldon?
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gf was washing her face, heard me laughing in the bedroom. "What're you laughing at?" "Give you one guess" "Sea lion."
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im at your bitch place putting ice in her deep fryer. she dont even got a deep fryer. i brought one over to put ice in the deep fryer
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My chamber is only "dimly lit" as a stylistic choice. You need to understand that. It's not because I can't afford candles. I could make it well lit in here anytime I wanted. I could make it blinding.
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China husband must’ve died recently
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Dispensary cashier: the AI labubu can't hurt you AI labubu:
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“Texas hedge,” is when you double-down instead of hedging. “Irish goodbye” is when you leave without saying goodbye. “California high-speed rail” is a similar linguistic construction.
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[trying to make conversation with Flossie, the world’s oldest living cat] So was 9/11 like, a thing for you guys too?
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ok, we need a moratorium on "gay actors for gay roles" and "making gay actors play coming-out scenes is torture" until we can figure out what is going on
They put Noah (a gay actor IRL) through 12 hours of filming a public coming-out scene: that’s psychological torture. They also put Natalia and Charlie, who’ve been together for 10 years IRL, through filming a breakup scene: again, psychological torture. They should be sued.
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I'm taking this way too personally btw. I'm fucking fuming. You come into MY neighborhood and you put your stupid fucking Trump face stickers on MY migrant resources??!? You're trying to out-sticker ME????? Hell No.
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someone has been putting MAGA stickers over my immigrant resources stickers. Fools. No idea what they're dealing with.
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just had two really good avocado/goat cheese/balsamic glaze sandwiches and I get why boomers thought millennials chose this over homeownership. delicious
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Amazing new emoji combo which I invite you all to use ✍️🤨👂
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if people could set stuff on fire with their minds youd expect there to be a lot more fires. but lighters are cheap, plentiful and easy to use. so youre already like 95% of the way there and you set things on fire almost never. so i guess its the last 5% that makes the difference
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No... 💔👎 What if my GirlFriend needs my to hang a door
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