Matt the Buff Joker
@undefeatedmatt
Followers
4,540
Following
1,122
Media
4,541
Statuses
21,956
He/Him; Husband, Father, Comrade. Mean online/Sweetie IRL. Terfs and Nazis are bffs
Failed State, USA
Joined May 2020
Don't wanna be here?
Send us removal request.
Explore trending content on Musk Viewer
jeno
• 467546 Tweets
Meet the Grahams
• 285834 Tweets
#بدر_بن_عبدالمحسن
• 262571 Tweets
Óscar Puente
• 78004 Tweets
Saka
• 54350 Tweets
#ライブ・エール
• 52296 Tweets
Bournemouth
• 42845 Tweets
こどもの日
• 36871 Tweets
サヨナラ
• 32875 Tweets
#霊験お初
• 32090 Tweets
الامير الشاعر
• 27895 Tweets
Havertz
• 21883 Tweets
الفردوس الاعلي
• 20971 Tweets
#ARSBOU
• 19463 Tweets
غاب نور البدر
• 14875 Tweets
Christie
• 13653 Tweets
Ipswich
• 13462 Tweets
アジカン
• 11592 Tweets
Fellas, is it gay to love your wife more than football?
884
9K
87K
We know a couple who are splitting up (dude cheated) and the wife just posted on IG, he sent her a clown costume on Amazon with a gift receipt saying “I know it will fit, you c*nt” and I’ve never wanted to drive to a dudes house and beat him on his own yard my entire life
220
3K
69K
If you have a Blue Sky account, we are bullying Jimmy Fallon
443
3K
43K
Kid Rock makes music for guys who have to breathe into a tube to start their cars
99
2K
28K
Joe Biden is one dumb MFer
A Joe Biden op-ed: "I’m proposing an additional $300 million to reinvigorate community policing in our country. Every single police department should have the money they need to institute real reforms"
2K
1K
3K
34
6K
26K
My dude, if you liked you wife and kids so much you shouldn’t have fucked your next door neighbor
7
167
18K
I’m a very monogamous person and I don’t think I can think of anyone in my immediate or extended family who has been unfaithful (a couple of aunts married dickheads who cheated). I’m just not sure how men, especially men with children, can ruin their whole life over some pussy
36
234
12K
@ajplus
You’re telling me the guy who built an empire on the wealth his father extracted from Africa and passed along to him, is running exploitative racism factories
26
667
12K
I told my kid that using some paint and imagination, she could transform this pumpkin into anything she wanted…
She wanted to transform it into a tomato
49
383
12K
Chasing Kyrsten Sinema into a wine cave and then rolling a giant boulder over the entrance
42
599
11K
If you had a Time Machine, would you be able to go back and do what needed to be done?
861
537
10K
Gonna tell my kids this was Hans Kristian Graebener
88
609
9K
Every time
NEW: Baltimore Police say the person shot was 17 years old, saying he was displaying traits of an armed person before he took off running. Officers rendered aid and the 17 year old is in critical condition.
@wjz
995
121
365
13
922
8K
Hearing the news that in 2021 the US economy experienced its largest growth in 40 years at the same time there aren’t enough healthcare workers to staff hospitals or teachers to staff schools *might* be a sign that our economic system sucks shit.
11
1K
6K
Well this blew up. I hope this little worm is on Twitter and sees how much everyone hates him and hopes he catches multiple beat downs
8
43
6K
Damn, this doin numbers.
Remember ladies, get you a communist man. Most of us eat ass and none of us give a shit about the Super Bowl.
47
166
5K
6
272
5K
If you’re the woman that got the clown outfit, DM me with his current location and I’ll take care of it. The people have spoken
14
50
5K
This MFer got his apes stolen once and then paid…38K in crypto to get one of them back. I’m at a loss for words.
63
288
4K
You are supposed to just lay down and take it. Anyone who doesn't, will be punished, severely.
386
2K
12K
15
137
4K
But Joe Rogan was a problematic endorsement...
39
395
3K
Just told my wife I’m circling the wagons to drive Jimmy Fallon off the new Twitter and she said “good, fuck him”
11
39
3K
Me and the boys on our way to do ageism and ableism to a thousand year old senator with dog food in her skull
43
167
3K
I was Josh Hawley’s roommate freshman year at Standford. I had to petition the RAs to get me a room change because he jerked off 24/7. He would even run home between classes to crank hog and go back w/o washing up. Nobody would room with him, his room was known as the “JO Lounge”
JOSH HAWLEY calls on men to take action and lead the republic: “Their manhood is the problem. More and more men are withdrawing into the enclave of idleness, porn, and video games.”
16
2
19
15
191
3K
If they made a movie about your life, who would voice your hog?
Jason Mantzoukas is voicing Tommy Lee's penis in Hulu's Pam & Tommy
84
69
1K
233
93
3K
Elon Musk tweets stolen boomer memes at 4am and spends his day sucking up to a man who calls himself Catturd and a Malaysian man whose body was once literally infested with ants, and you think other people should be acting “normal”?
@elonmusk
@CommunityNotes
Leftists when Elon asks them to be normal and reap the same rewards
64
31
1K
23
152
3K
Check out the 3/20, for March 20th, the day Biden promised Warren she could be VP if she dropped out.
She put DBFH (Dream Big Fight Hard) and BLM (Black Lives Matter) in her shot. Absolute legend.
665
3K
22K
13
184
2K
Very cool to see this dystopian horror story on my timeline and all of the boosted replies are like “yeah, we should k*ll people for literally anything”. Great job
@elonmusk
48
157
2K
I don’t gotta pay for clout. I was born to post
12
72
2K
This is the breastfeeding 5 year old now, feel old yet?
30
54
2K
A lot of right-wing accounts who have spent the last 9 months attacking and harassing trans people online/in state legislatures are having a hard time believing Elliot Page was attacked and harassed for being trans. Their evil opinions don’t matter. Support our trans friends 💪🏳️⚧️
60
154
2K
Me, waking up and logging into Twitter every day
3
215
2K
St. Louis Sushi (ham wrapped around cream cheese and a pickle)
225
126
2K
Uh oh. All the “inclusive” and “tolerant” have found my tweet and are mocking my family bc we dare to believe differently than them. I’m so sad. 😔 Oh well. To all them I say: Here’s another pic of us enjoying what we believe about gender, sexuality, identity, and love. ❤️😘
800
38
587
16
114
2K
Now a bunch of anarchist dorks are mad at me because the NFL is good actually and revolution will only come if you can talk to people about football. (This is a shitpost you fucking nerds)
25
31
2K
Bad news folks, now she knows I’m in she wants my first code
7
13
2K
Literally nobody wants you or your dumb kids at pride, idiot
Liberals, this is the problem.
I don't have an issue with Pride month. I'm a straight married man with kids. I have gay friends. I've been to Pride parties and events. I'm comfortable in who I am. I even laugh along when my gay friends make fun of my masculinity. It's ok to poke…
3K
5K
17K
35
55
2K
Shut the fuck up
Matt, the buff arm dude, wants people to act like heathens in public and never have consequences. He probably would tell your daughter she deserved to get raped for dressing so provocatively.
96
1
20
17
22
1K
The Watertown Police Department is sad to announce one of our officers, Lt. Pigg E. Smalls, died of starvation outside the Starbucks on Patten St today
The ANTIFA employees made Lt Smalls wait for his Biscotti and Coffee Milkshake and he passed away.
#BackTheBlue
#ThinBlueLine
33
251
1K
That’s the dumbest fucking thing I’ve ever heard, you must be a god damn child + ratio + L
@undefeatedmatt
@gayest_tone
@seapherkrun
@9mm_smg
The rich are rich and the poor are poor bc of their own decisions with their money. To think otherwise is ignorant. And it crashes bc of reckless spending in Washington.
63
0
0
8
32
1K
Trying to make it a special Mother’s Day for ALL of the moms out there, one ratio at a time
6
19
1K
Hot Take: Will Forte is a better actor than anyone who has taken home the Oscar for Best Oscar this century
40
55
1K
Look at how they really start to fall away in the early 2000’s when most of the boomer women were in their 40’s and 50’s
@Adequate_Scott
There’s a graph that shows how drastically abortions in the US dropped off after Boomers became infertile. They had all the abortions and then decided it was time to tighten up restrictions. Women like this belong in a 🪵 chipper
5
20
353
11
142
1K
Hey Dylan Mulvaney,
Let me lay this out for you in the simplest terms possible:
My friend
@SarahHuckabee
is a real woman.
You are not.
@BudLight
- take note!
11K
162
2K
11
35
1K
Imagine paying 8 dollars a month to make a 500 word tweet telling everyone how CBD made you poop your pants. Hilarious
14
48
1K
107
11
85
4
36
1K
He lost interest in his marriage once it turned 18
14
53
953
It hurt like hell but I think it came out really well
37
37
894
Hey everyone; the dipshit blue check with the worlds tiniest hands is back posting 4000 character tweets that nobody is reading
@BRobs1776
@ConservativesSo
Studies related to Drag Queens and children:
--------------
"Drag queens, otherwise known as “female impersonators," are most typically gay men"
Jennifer O’Brien Ph.D.
All Thing LGBT
-------------------------
The proportions of heterosexual and homosexual pedophiles among…
82
0
0
50
18
938
Honesty if this prick was at my kids bus stop every day I’d sneak up on him with a spiked fuckin bat. What a dumb pussy
Tonight on
@wbaltv11
: A man with an AR-15 has been showing up for weeks to a school bus drop off for local elementary school students.
Parents say their kids are afraid, the man says he’s protesting
@GovWesMoore
’s new gun control law. You’ll hear from both sides at 5+6pm.
8K
3K
5K
37
20
818
@JohnCleese
Bro, you’re worth 20 million dollars. Don’t you have some grandkids you could be chilling with instead of whatever this is?
6
4
781
Damn, where was he when we needed him?
I am here outside the New York Public Library, which is holding a 100th birthday party for Henry Kissinger tonight.
The guest list is secret, but I've confirmed that Secretary of State Tony Blinken will attend.
I'll be here on the red carpet, documenting who else shows up.
496
962
5K
15
43
789
@jordanbpeterson
They can have a black James Bond if they give us a white Shaft. Or how about a remake of Roots with an all-white cast?
Or, how about they actually create a NEW action franchise with a black lead? Can they create anything new anymore?
191
0
26
14
49
780
@StephanieCarvin
Next make a cake that looks like The Hague and then lock yourself inside it
0
9
690
Hell yeag
Today is the day I eat a Turkey leg for breakfast
0
0
44
23
33
717
This might just look like a right-wing reactionary attacking women, but the truth is I was a fry cook at a Hooters in MD in college and Matt Walsh used to come in and jack off in the bathroom. He got caught and we dragged him out while he was crying with his little dick out.
13
60
680
No Goombas on Mars 👎 👎 👎
@elonmusk
The Republic of Mars should have immigration laws that prohibit woke/socialist/communist immigration. If they don't like it they can stay here or build their own rockets and facilities.
Do you agree? Or have a policy that aligns better with your wishes?
155
4
5
18
30
694
Once dudes hit a certain age they begin to develop very strong opinions on what root beer is the best root beer. It’s perfectly natural.
101
42
613
Miller Lite really chose this person to be the face of their working-class beer brand.
These ad agencies are suicidal.
2K
2K
23K
5
30
622
So for the past two months I’ve been scamming boomers on FB by telling them I will get them counterfeit Vax cards but stealing their identity in the process, and using it to buy a bunch of shit that I then Re-Sell on Facebook to the same stupid assholes.
Here is Decembers haul:
53
38
577
In honor of my shithead neighbors moving out today, here’s a video of their dog having sex with a bag of garbage before tearing it up and leaving trash all over the lawn
20
43
597
@dizzydoinggreat
Incredible. A lot of these confessionals read like bad fiction, but this one 100% happened. Believe that
1
0
635
I’m sorry, Queen, but this looks like a screenshot of a Hoarders episode
26
15
558
Looking for 202k of my friends
*Will not follow back
45
42
586