BREAKING: Gallons of Elon Musk's sperm were destroyed in the Palm Springs IVF clinic bombing.

yes, sir. violence is the language of the oppressor. if we want to be understood, we gotta speak their language.

God damn. No words have been spoken more brutal than how Eli made Bari look here.

I just flew from Minnesota back home to learn that I will need to fly back there if I want to continue masturbating regularly. Thank you Charlie Kirk.

I'm supposed to have empathy for a guy that doesn't believe in it???

@elonmusk @TeamYouTube The YouTube appeal process involved me clicking a button that sent an immediate denial. There was no ability to provide a defense of this as satire, no human eyeballs. This insult was my reward for providing YouTube with free content I don't get paid for.

@elonmusk @TeamYouTube Over the past two years, I've probably made more satirical videos critical of @elonmusk than anyone. Now suddenly I'm receiving "community violations." Does any community other than Wall Street consider being critical of wealth a violation?

I received a YouTube strike for cyberbullying and harassing @elonmusk for a video where he is a serial killer bragging about cutting up America and throwing it in the trash. @TeamYouTube How is a satirical video criticizing wealth inequality cyberbullying a billionaire?

One of my YouTube videos was taken down for violating community standards and being "dangerous" because I credited a royalty free song. @TeamYouTube Is this a new policy?

We are in dark times, but the promise of a semi-realistic Albert Einstein sex robot is a glimmer of hope the end of the tunnel.

@hpmcd1 The Bible wasn’t written by guys named John, Mark, Luke, and Matthew in English. Their real names were: •Yohanan •Marqos •Luqa •Mattai They were Aramaic-speaking Jews—not white Republicans from Ohio

Unskilled right-wing Americans often do this to get fired so they can collect what is essentially unemployment benefits from other unskilled right-wing Americans. It's a super weird manifestation unintentional, anarchist-socialism.

concept by @ifonlytimeline created by @terminal_mode

Although Donald Trump might not have said these exact words to Jeffrey Epstein, he did invite him to party with him at Mar-a-Lago and he did say these exact words.

It's why Democrats will continue to lose. Republicans cater to their extremist wing that wants to annihilate minorities & bring in a new era of fascism and white supremacy. Democrats push away our "extremists" who want universal heath care & fair living conditions for everyone.

My statement on Donald Trump's threat to deport me and his praise for Eric Adams, who the President "helped out" of legal accountability.

Anyone who calls the country "I Ran" or pronounces Tehran "Tay Ron" should have all their opinions on either ignored.

Last week in Peru, a thousand year old artifact was unearthed revealing new insights into what will surely come to be known as the "Sassy Era" of human history.

Ahem, @SenSchumer , might a congratulations to the winner of the Democratic Mayoral primary of your city be in order?

America is the proudest oligarchic gerontocracy in the entire world. It makes complete sense why poor, young men stormed the capital to protect this way of life.

Kyle Porterhouse