Teddy Blank
@teddypowday
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Investing in climate/deep tech/hard computing @FirstStarVC . Skiing, surfing, sneakers, Boston sports. “AAANNYYTHIIIINNNGG IS POOOSSSIIBBLLEEE!!!!” - KG
Cambridge, MA
Joined October 2010
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Pinned Tweet
Things Are Looking Down (In A Good Way) - aka It’s Time To Dig
I wrote about how I think we should all spend a little more time looking down - opportunity abounds in the subsurface. If you’re working on something in this space, please reach out! (Writing at link in my profile)
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So weird that we ended up with fast, bolt, pipe, bird, ftx et al in the past few years. No idea how that happened
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A killer question I like to ask founders: “who in your space do you think is doing fraud right now?” And then I go fund that company instead
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Watching the m*ami mayor go through the 5 stages of tech bro in 2 weeks is incredible
1. I like startups
2. I fucking LOVE VCs
3. I’m getting coffee with everyone
4. I’m launching an accelerator
5. I’m talking about bitcoin and nothing else
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Extremely disrespectful of domm to break fast during ramadan
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Which startup is democratizing access to shutting the fuck up
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People getting wearables and learning that they should be sleeping more and drinking less alcohol
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Use this simple format to get your cold emails answered:
- I love you
- we have bootstrapped to $150m in revenue
This is what a great cold email looks like. Meeting him Monday.
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Stripe should put the bolt guy’s whole twitter thread in their s-1
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My wife got our daughter to eat cabbage by calling it purple salad (true). Branding matters
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Unfortunate how often I’ll visit a startup’s website and just end up googling “company X fundraise” instead to read something that actually explains what they do
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Despite getting ~30% of Shopify for $7m, I think there's an argument for
@BessemerVP
to include the company in their anti-portfolio, too. Completely exited their position at IPO at ~$1.5B mkt cap. As of this morning, Shopify's mkt cap is $110B+
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The list of questions I ask when meeting founders for the first time
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If ur man is modeling 7-year cashflows for seed-stage startups that’s not ur man that’s tiger global
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If the future of code is no code, the future of work is no work
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I must say it takes balls to tweet about another man's fraud & poor internal controls & cash-incineration when you sit on the board of a company that has lied on their past two years of financial statements and is about to be delisted for not making any money
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It’s only american dynamism if it comes from the el segundo region of california. Otherwise it’s just sparkling manufacturing
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How you gonna do Fast and then tweet like this. Be serious now
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Broke: after 4 great years, today is my last day at UnicornXYZ, here’s my life lessons and thankyousomuchiloveyoubye!
Woke: today’s my last day after 4 years, taking some time to reflect and plan what’s next 🔜🔜🔜
Bespoke: I’m vested as of last week fuck y’all
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Laughing my ass off at the thread of eightsleep users who now cannot sleep when they’re away from home
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It is very funny how every year marc andreessen writes an essay like “I think technology is good 👍” and everyone loses their minds over it
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If we are serious about advancing american dynamism we should be giving coffee to children
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Baseball is dope because even after being murdered, burned, buried, forced to wander this earthly realm as a ghost, and resurrected again by this pitch - Bichette STILL took Kershaw to the moon later in the game
Clayton Kershaw, Soul Stealing 73mph Curveball. 👻
"Did you see that shit?" 😂
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The most aggressive vc-on-vc shit talking happens in the *other notes* columns of google sheets titled “potential series A investors”
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Compliance at my wife’s new job says I can’t trade derivatives anymore but inshallah I will find a way to short launch house
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I can’t explain this but harry stebbings and lucy guo are the same
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WeWork, Theranos, and Fast have the highest entrepreneurial talent density of any startup — and it’s not even close.
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Nothing like jumping on a zoom call w/ a founder and both suddenly realizing you’d met once before - smoking a j on a dark roof at a house party in 2017
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(VC watching starship flight): wow this totally validates my deep tech portfolio of unrelated startups
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One commonality (of many) between toddlers and VCs is they’ll learn about something for the first time and instantly become unable to shut the fuck about it. Our 2yo talking about the guacamole at last night’s dinner sounds exactly like a legacy fund GP who just discovered NFTs
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I reject any economic worldview that does not as a baseline assume continuous acceleration of absolutely insane technological progress for the next 50 years
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Reply with your best post of the year. Not the one that did the best numbers necessarily but the one you’re proudest of
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@TylerIAm
lone helmet staring forlornly out to sea
Hawai‘i will not participate in EasyPost Hawai‘i Bowl.
“The recent surge in COVID-19 cases has forced us to not participate in the game. We are disappointed for our players, coaches, and fans.”- Athletics Director David Matlin.
➡️
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Babe are you ok, you've barely broken SEC solicitation rules by tweeting about your ongoing fundraise
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I hired this founder to be an sdr reporting to me (in 2015). Within 6 weeks he'd wandered completely off the sales team and become tight with the CEO, a sort-of-COS. Now they're co-founders. What I'm saying is, I am a kingmaker, ultra-connector and superb eye for talent
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Spending $150 on a CO2 monitor to discover that no, the air in the house is perfectly fine for cognitive performance, I’m just stupid
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It's actually illegal to pitch a comp bio startup without mentioning in your first three slides that it takes $2b and ten years to bring a new drug to market. Few understand this
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Sorry I have to reschedule our meeting, got a tweet that’s kinda popping off rn
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Alternate headline: startup sells 40% of the company at series A
New York-based
@Articulate
lands $1.5B in Series A funding led by
@generalatlantic
. Articulate is developing e-learning software, content, and community that’s changing the way the world learns.
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Making sure my family has all their ecomm subscriptions on point. Health is so important
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@amritxyz
Would you rather get paid $1,000,000 right now or accidental venmo payments every month for the rest of your life?
I'll take Option B.
That's what passive income is.
Find a way to make passive income, it'll change your life.
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There’s nothing I love more than beating google maps estimates. Fuck you google, you don’t know me
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The problem with new balance (and it is a *problem*) is that their high-end sneakers have incredible materials and a ton of great detail but still come off as "math major shoes" to most people. These resell for $6-700 and are pretty dope but also… kinda fkn nerd shit
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The only career advice I have for anyone in college: go work for a startup whose “stuff” (product, mission, market, whatever) you give a shit about
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Rise above the supply chain, gift your loved ones limoncello this holiday season
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I wrote a short post on something I care deeply about, and I hope it resonates with people on a similar mission. Please reach out if you’re working on climate stuff in this realm or if you just want to chat. We all need to win together here
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I don’t know why, but this photo just made me miss living in nyc so intensely that I have literal pangs in my chest rn
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The broad-strokes dismissal of sales/ops/mktg as valuable learning *and building* roles in startups is a huge miss by so many (otherwise very smart) people in tech
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We’re not raising seed plus or seed extension but a secret, more complex third thing
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Wire fees exist because the banks have to pay willy wonka a royalty each time they use the Television Chocolate technology to shrink the money and send it around through the tv. Few understand this
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Imagine being 20 years old and talented enough to work at facebook full-time and choosing to work at facebook full-time
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I hope I’m not still investing in climate tech 3-4 decades from now
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@gbrl_dick
@Candle_Face
I wrote a tweet - “my milady mutuals when taylor lorenz shows up at their door with a 180 page landian neo lolita fascist accelerationalist manifesto attributable to sonora.” I said, that’s a good tweet. I’d never owned a milady. I’d never seen taylor lorenz
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Why does everyone joining ondeck feel the need to write a 40 tweet thread about it when they could just say “I can’t wait to be in the slack group”
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@chiefofstuffs
At bschool “partner” was the preferred term bc it’s a catch-all and makes no assumptions/you can’t offend anyone. Married/dating, gay/straight, man/woman. But I’ve specifically asked my wife to start referring to me as partner so ppl mistake me for a GP
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My wife saw this pic saved in my phone, started to ask why, then half-sighed and said, “is it because you think this bird would make for a cool sneaker?”
To be known is to be loved
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Everyone who has told me meditation made them a better person must have really needed it fr because they’re still unbearable
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Emissions math aside, it’s wild to me that smart people see impossible/beyond meat as legit meat alternatives at scale. The stuff is Not Healthy and Not That Tasty, and lab-grown meat is well on its way to becoming commercial reality. Worth arguing about ag/energy, but meat >>>
I think you need to check your science. Infact home insulation does little. Solar/wind without storage does not do enough. Banishing cows form the planet does more than electric cars and with
@Impossible
near zero cost (unlike EV's) in taste and soon in cost/burger :
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Other questions to consider:
Do you love this shit?
Are you high right now?
Do you ever get nervous?
Are you single?
I heard you fucked your girl, is it true?
You getting money?
On the Questions To Ask When Trying to Hire Kids Who are Currently Enrolled at Elite Universities…
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Current state of the market:
March 25 - "we're raising series a"
April 28 - "actually nvm seed plus"
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When the culture wars come for me I will be pinned down under heavy fire holding the “it’s fine to use ‘guys’ to address any group of people” hill
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@WillManidis
I’m not being predatory I just legitimately believe I could run your company better and so I need voting control and majority ownership
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Reminder who runs the fast sales team
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@abarrallen
Yes but you should not have had to incinerate $100m to have learned the lessons (?) you posted
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You actually can eat IRR, just not raw. You gotta to bake it into a new fund and wait for it to harden into a management fee crust
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The amount of cocaine talk in the GCs of late is absurd. People are ready
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Since being vaccinated I’ve gone full anti-masker. I’m finna get a flight grounded before summer hits
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