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jakey bake Profile
jakey bake

@parttimewinner

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2K
Following
56K
Media
469
Statuses
16K

some of this is real | he/him/y’all

Texas to Florida
Joined November 2010
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
@parttimewinner
jakey bake
5 years
scientists are gaslighting snails
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@davidehrlich
david ehrlich
4 days
every time I think I’m done with this whole thing I’m introduced to a word like “goblinchad” and I instantly start idiotmaxxing all over again
@PresidentToguro
President-Elect Toguro
6 days
Clavicular gets BRUTALLY selfiemogged by the baldmaxxing goblinchad William Banks causing a HYPER SPIKE in his cortisol levels
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@sardonic_greek
Solzhenixon
5 days
Red Camry. Move out of the passing lane within 20 seconds or be fired upon.
@sardonic_greek
Solzhenixon
5 days
You should be able to hail other cars for communication like space ships
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@notsofast
notsofast
5 days
"so I'm just free to go? what's the catch?" "nothing really. Just keep to this itinerary for the next 72 hours. and again from time to time, when we send you one" "a rave?" "you'll have a great time. you should have an easy time, ah, mawging them."
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@bobo_circus
hilary wank
5 days
fascinated by this new addition to the canon. is he trying to get revenge for Clavicular's framemogging? is he seeking to usurp ASU FRAT LEADER's position? where can you find the Chad Rankings? this feels like in an ASOIAF book when a new point-of-view character is introduced
@Kick_Champ
KickChamp👑
5 days
#2 ranked CHAD ANDROGENIC continues to SEARCH the city as the ASU FRAT LEADER remains UNSEEN 👀
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@Protect_Wldlife
PROTECT ALL WILDLIFE
25 days
A sad day for the great Montana Bison. Interior Secretary Doug Bergum, at the request of Little Greg Gianforte and the corporate zombie Montana Senators/Reps, has ended conservation grazing permits for Bison on the great American Prairie, a huge section of restored Bison land
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@PlamoDaddy
𝐯𝐅𝐢𝐧𝐧
27 days
🚨BREAKING🚨 Zohran Mamdani will FORCE all New Yorkers to watch the entire Mobile Suit Gundam U.C. timeline in CHRONOLOGICAL ORDER. What are your thoughts on this?
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@PoliticsINQ
Philadelphia Inquirer Politics
27 days
The National Park Service has started dismantling exhibits about slavery at the President’s House in Independence National Historical Park.
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@facetedcarapace
microplastics slime quest 🧫
27 days
not a fuckboy monkfluencer 😭
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@parttimewinner
jakey bake
4 months
I heard Swifties are practically a new religion, I didn’t believe it until I went to a wedding where the entire bridal party mentioned Taylor in their speeches. Also they ritually sacrificed some kid on some huge shrine dedicated to the big Swift herself during the reception.
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@MiaAgraviador
Mia Agraviador
6 months
Kawhi Leonard? The environmental philanthropist?
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@parttimewinner
jakey bake
6 months
bards when you cast haste on them and they just double down on trying to rizz up the dragon mid combat
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@TheWapplehouse
Kristi Yamaguccimane
6 months
Me: these 9 Sapporos ain’t shit Me, 37 minutes later:
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@K_A_N_D_E_L
Michael Kandel
6 months
Zohran: New York should be affordable for everyone Cuomo: A single mother is homeless because your rent is too low Eric Adams: Deep down, I think I must be little bit Dominican
@NYCMayor
Mayor Zohran Kwame Mamdani
6 months
Deep down, I think I must be little bit Dominican because marching down 6 Avenue in the Dominican Day Parade just felt like coming home! Every time I meet Dominican New Yorkers, I’m inspired by their generosity and energized by their passion. ¡Que viva el pueblo dominicano!
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@billybrizzle420
Brizz-Chan (Mr drive)
7 months
I keep seeing ragebait posts about people on food stamps bro every missile in the iron dome costs 200 grand and we pay for them all I don't care if some chick with 6 kids bought name brand cheerios
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@bjorn_brother
Brother Bjorn
8 months
They tried to sell off America's wilderness and the animal which embodies the nation literally killed itself inside of earth's gleaming iridescent eye. Terrible omen, millions must be sacrificed in the boiling waters of Norris Geyser Basin to atone for this blasphemy
@nypost
New York Post
8 months
Bison boils to death in Yellowstone hot spring in front of tourists https://t.co/wL65yellgv
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@Trail_Cams
trailcam
8 months
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@weedhitter
republic of gamers land acknowledgement
8 months
Tiger Woulds
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@hindsight2121
Hindsight
9 months
missed generational wealth again
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@parttimewinner
jakey bake
10 months
Jakey in NYC what will he do?
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