Lee Crawford
@Vampire337
Followers
11,879
Following
12,994
Media
6,579
Statuses
26,198
Antipartisan. Data over Opinions. Sometimes sarcastic. Blocking people on Twitter lets them know they won. Retweet without comment = ALWAYS endorsement.
Cincinnati, OH
Joined September 2010
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HAPPY TRIP WITH BECCCA
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Flamengo
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Gojo
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#jjk260
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#wewantimrankhanlive
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Sukuna
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Chivas
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マイクラ
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Nitro
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サマソニ
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プロデュース
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Gege
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Yuji
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#BRIDGERTON
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都知事選
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국회의장
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アサクリ
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スニーク
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Favourite IPL
• 10058 Tweets
Pinned Tweet
@LordDrakulzen
@Mr_Al_Dixon
@rcn400
I think we've outgrown representative democracy.
If you've got 15 minutes to watch a Ted Talk, this guy lays out basically the sort of system I've been saying we need to transition to for over a decade. Far more eloquently than I can write in a tweet.
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Step 1: Get a successful company banned in American market.
Step 2: Force company to sell to you and your friends at a severe discount because of your legislative devaluation.
See? Capitalism is great when you can leverage the federal government to give you an unfair advantage!
Steve Mnuchin, Trump’s former Treasury Secretary, has revealed he is gathering a group of investors to buy TikTok.
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@theeunfluencer
"See? This kid calls himself Awake. You see what all your woke culture is about? It's not the guns, it's..."
*psst psst psst*
"What? He's one of ours? Dammit... Quick, tweet about gas prices!"
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@ask_aubry
Generation warfare aside, this is what happens when we feel the need to control things which are not ours to control.
Souls & karma will manage themselves. Better to stick to learning what you need to in your short time here.
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@Chris_A425
I don't know if there are official rules on informal speech, but...
I think it's meant to roughly mean "for the sake of fuck", which means that fuck owns the sake, thus a possessive "for fuck's sake" is "correct" (air quotes here).
But again, iunno if rules apply to expletives.
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@DonaldJTrumpJr
@realDonaldTrump
Assuming this wasn't staged, this is terrible behavior.
About as terrible as separating children from their families and putting them in cages
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@ShannenJPEG
@JPEGculture
"Doing things purely for enjoyment is quite silly, really."
- the guy who spent 44 billion dollars to troll Twitter for enjoyment
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@TomiLahren
@TomiLahren
is right!
The FBI needs to also hold Donald Trump accountable for being one of the Epstein/Maxwell child abusers.
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@Acyn
Actually, when exactly two Boeing 737 Max planes crashed, they were banned. Worldwide. Until they could prove that it wouldn't happen again.
And you can certainly bet that if there were a plane crash every month, we'd have long banned planes before y2k.
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@rr_parkinson
@MaryLTrump
Elon's Parody Penis seems like it fits the criteria.
But to be fair, he's already shown he'll start making up rules on the fly when he's mad, so YMMV.
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@KcfanScott
1% mortality rate is 1 of 100 people dead. At even a tenth of that, if one of every 1000 planes fell from the sky there'd be no airline industry. If 1 of 1000 cars exploded on the highway none would drive.
1 of 100 is over 3 million dead. Why do you hate 3.3 million Americans?
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@KeneAkers
"I’m asking for the community to consider all the facts of the situation before making a judgment."
- Lansing Police Chief Ellery Sosebee
The facts: Lansing police handcuffed an innocent 12yo before they had reason to arrest him.
Maybe ask your questions with the parent present
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@KeneAkers
And now the police department (rightly) owes their victim restitution, which likely won't happen until after a lawsuit, and then will come out of taxpayer pockets.
We need some legislators to start making laws so that cops share in the accountability for their actions.
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@TheDailyShow
I like that Ben Carson is not afraid to take a stand for what he's aware he believes in.
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@CalltoActivism
@nathaliejacoby1
Biden is going to negotiate with a man who took a full fifteen rounds to get the nomination for his position from his own party.
He's basically negotiating with a kindergarten teacher who fought for three weeks to get their class to eat candy. I think he's got solid footing. 😅
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@thefabf3line
@d0miniquee_
Seems like the consensus on Twitter is that during black history month, a black woman should not be allowed to make her own life choices.
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@LadyDLuvs420
So what I'm hearing is she won & you walked off with her still staring you down. 😑
🤣
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@ElJayces
@Roberts11Major
@OmarJimenez
@jaketapper
I'm not gonna say that this is just a troll account who exists to aggravate people, but, here's some data.
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@brado_77
@WoodrowForCO
*hastily applies this pic to half of my tweets which have been misunderstood*
*tweeps don't care; me still ratioed*
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@serena_patriot
If you burn down your neighbor's house, do you not owe them a place to stay until their house is safely inhabitable again?
Those that call themselves Christians or humanists who refuse to shoulder the burden we created are as-described, in name only.
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@LibertyHangout
He's not murdered. Volunteers treated his wounds. Please don't post untruth. If you don't know, don't add.
The man charged an angry crowd with a sword. Much poor choices here.
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@OneYearWorld
When I was a kid momma would give me two bucks 'n send me to the store, where I'd get a carton of cigarettes, a few bags of chips, two gallons of milk, pocketful of candy, several loaves of bread, maybe some lunchmeat & frozen pizzas...
Can't do that anymore. They got cameras.
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@MidnightCastle_
@bestsportnascar
@JoshMacDonald19
@BourbonPlanner
@CNN
Okay, hive had enough internet for today.
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@charliekirk11
Land doesn't vote.
People do vote.
81 > 75.
Barack Obama didn't run for president in 2020.
Thanks for coming to my TED Talk.
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@davenewworld_2
@antifaoperative
Bar owner should've just complied and parked his bar somewhere else before the cops drove into it. 🤷
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@antifaoperative
"Your honor, I'd like to submit to the court, for purposes of sentencing, a written statement on social media from the defendant on what he would like to be the end result for people in his situation."
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@ask_aubry
"I'm older and wiser now."
*moves in with friend for six months, asks for more time, proceeds to hook up with friend's fiancé & end their marriage*
*still blames his parents, the friend, and everyone in the area who thinks you should get a job*
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@ALT_uscis
Wouldn't it be funny if this man ended up having to register as a sex offender due to indecent exposure charges, all from video of him stealing a political sign with his proud boy hanging out?
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@KeneAkers
I've seen a lot of MAGAs share videos of black people looting, and they clearly mean to imply that all blacks are predisposed to this behavior.
These people believe anyone calling out a white person also intends it as an attack. They assume the world works the way they do.
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@PotusHaikus
@cirnoplusplus
As a professional connoisseur of lucrative stock purchasing vehicles, I've got to "lol" at your tweet. Options and shorting penny stocks with bacon dividends and daytrading candlesticks.
But you're interested, at least. Stonks.
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@RepLoriTrahan
@nonocarbs
Gosh, I wish politicians would do something. Like pass a bill to stop price gouging.
Imagine there were a bill like that, up for Senate approval. Someone should tell Tammy Duckworth to introduce a bill like that. Surely the red team wouldn't vote against it. Against the people.
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@BlackKnight10k
Crazy that the guy who took fifteen rounds of votes to secure his position, lost it in just one vote. 🤔
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@ask_aubry
If & when he does get cancer and needs someone loyal to take care of him...
Maybe he go look up the girl he cheated with. He was there for her in his wife's hour of need.
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@Dadilicious2
@republiculos
Still waiting for Trump to start tweeting that he's responsible for this travel ban and how it has saved so many lives.
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@TheDailyShow
Next time someone tells you that you should just suck it up and pay a dollar a week (per publishing company) if you want to get through their paywall and see the article...
...remind them that New York Times has 7 figures to toss at a free game that doesn't display ads.
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@toastOK
@Jamesrus42
I mean, I guess no one has proven that being around invisible unicorns isn't the leading cause of cancer, heart disease, insomnia, and social media addiction. 🤔
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@PatricProAuthor
Southwest Ohio had been putting them in all over the place the last half decade.
We're still learning how to not sit there at a complete stop looking both ways before hesitantly merging into one.
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@old4dis
@CalltoActivism
Could you maybe explain why you thought that was relevant?
If the OP had an AR15 in their hand right now, would it help unscare the cops in that SWAT unit who let those children die? If all the libs in the country touched a gun today, would it help stop mass shootings?
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@h8Wankmaggot45
I genuinely like both of my kids.
Sorry, wait, wife just informed me that's the cats. Turns out those horrid vagrant neighbor children are actually mine.
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@thatdaneshguy
@Coppellisd
To some extent, this is the downside to "zero tolerance" policies concerning fighting. They have to mark the checkbox that all parties were disciplined.
This video appears to show the aggressor clearly in the wrong. Maybe the admins didn't watch it? Not good PR,
@Coppellisd
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Check out this neat snowflake gift someone gave to DeSantis. He's smiling so broadly..
Hold up. . That's a word cut into it, isn't it? 🤣🤐🤣
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@MelyCreative
You had me at "vegan fur".
Now, how many vegans had to die for each one of these?
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@ask_aubry
Uncomfortable reminder that those who wish to control women's bodies are more okay with slipping her a pill she doesn't want than letting her take one she does.
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@ask_aubry
"Am I the asshole for not going, as I've stated clearly, an entire three quarters of a mile out of my way to get my wife something that she specifically indicated she wanted but cannot get herself because she's busy with work?"
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@MyDailyMagazin1
All you need to know is that the editor of this fine article apparently doesn't know tenet from tenant.
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@MNateShyamalan
@Bean_of_Boston
1. Find controversial topic which doesn't affect me.
2. Use mediocre humor to pander to angry people who remember I existed.
3 P̶r̶o̶f̶i̶t̶ believe I'm somewhat relevant.
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@cheesemanab
All jokes, I'm sure, but I'm entertained that the responses are generally "the fish deserve it".
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@TeaPainUSA
When the President of the United States sounds like a Seinfeld bit.
That's just tucked up.
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@KrittyB419
@TheDailyShow
He'll pretend he ain't seen it, but once again we'll all know
#GymJordanKnew
.
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To everyone who's been vaccinated and is about to become a zombie tomorrow...
...can I have your stuff?
There it is.
The fuckening 🙄
Fun fact, if you have a cell phone, you’ve been “exposed” to 5G for a long time now. Hell, even if you don’t you’ve been exposed to it.
Wait until they hear about 6G, which is coming in a few years 🤭🫣
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@Angry_Staffer
@Bean_of_Boston
The face you make when your life flashes before your eyes
...and you have not lived a good life.
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@JuddLegum
@Bean_of_Boston
@RonDeSantis
There is some impressive irony that people are taking money from DeSantis and handing it directly to Disney.
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Apparently I'm the only one who saw "Ohio Walmart" trending and jumped to conclusions involving anything but another mass shooting.
Forty-five minutes from my house. Six miles from the plant I was at last week.
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Live your life in such a way that the entire planet does not go dancing in the streets when you lose your job.
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@jasondashbailey
@Bean_of_Boston
With more sexual references & innuendo than you can Shake your speare at!
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@ask_aubry
Not a bad mom. A bad mom would set herself up to fail, would feel no remorse for dropping the ball, would blame others for her failures, & would be confrontational when discussing rather than engaging & trying to find solutions.
All of which it sounds like the husband is doing.
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@ask_aubry
I feel like this shouldn't be the issue it is. There's many "checkbox" issues like this. If they're not compatible with you, move on.
Men who want a settle-down wife aren't compatible with career focused women. We don't need to hear it framed like they're a turnoff to other men.
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@ask_aubry
I think that a major goal of dating is to become comfortable enough with someone that you can be your true self around them. In two years he's never done this sort of thing before. Now he's shown himself.
This is not what she wants anymore. Hopefully she sees it.
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@fbcooper1
@MaryLTrump
Well, I wasn't gonna spend no eight dollars, but now I'm gonna go start a gofundme for 80k...
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...was that Kennedy Superbowl commercial intended to confuse really old people into thinking they can vote for JFK? 🤔
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@InfoAgeStrategy
@Triode_in_situ
Never dismiss Russian propaganda.
After all, look what Russian propaganda was able to accomplish here in the US.
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@LeciaMichelle11
@BlackKnight10k
43, white, voted blue in an overwhelmingly red state.
Bring lumped in with the demographic doesn't instill much feeling of solidarity. I get it, but broad brush strokes are generally not inclusive. Just know that some of us are allies as you paint the picture.
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@KazePlays_JC
I'd hafta pull over to heckle if they also have a "socialism doesn't work" bumper sticker.
But in all seriousness, I'd stop to help. Might be the only time they'll be open to listening to someone outside of their usual echo chamber. Maybe reality has a plan.
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@charliekirk11
Incidentally, you also cannot be a Christian and not support giving all your wealth to the poor.
When Jesus makes a point of restating what He *just* said, you should doubly pay attention.
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@ask_aubry
OP should add "he broke my arm" to EVERY sentence. Then it'll be clearer.
"My fiancé is an amazing guy who broke my arm. The foundation of our relationship is strong, but he still broke my arm. He is so perfect and good to me in every way except that he broke my fucking arm."
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@antifaoperative
He served four years, and then when released from jail he went back and did it again? 😮
It's almost like a light prison sentence didn't rehabilitate him. 🤔
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@LeeFrostsCOL
@BlissInTexas
@Tone_Killick
@BritishSpiders
I had a similar situation when I awoke to find my warm laptop commandeered by a mama wolf spider.
After some days she gathered her brood, checked out of hotel my-lappy, left her web & didn't even leave a tip for cleanup. I rated her two stars on AirBNB.
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Trump supporters are fiercely declaring that the FBI raid @ Mar-A-Lago is a political hitjob to destroy him in the public eye before his 2024 presidential bid.
I missed this anger from them when Trump tried to pressure Ukraine's leader to do that exact thing to Biden in 2019. 🤔
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@MMendlowPhD
@TriCiArtPeace
@Sessler
@deesnider
Ironic when so many display the flag of the states that wanted to secede from the nation they claim to be so patriotic about.
#AmericaFirstWhenItsConvenient
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@VaultedPolitics
...it's too soon for me to use this as anecdotal evidence that prayer works, right?
Fine. I'll wait until she actually quits. Or gets eaten by a bear.
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@FLOTUS
"Complete transparency", cries the family who won't release their tax records to the American people.
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If you are reading this, you are now a zombie.
I think that's how this works.
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