Oxtail Papi 🇲🇺
@OxtailPxpi
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3,762
Following
2,035
Media
3,015
Statuses
31,699
Mr. #NoRules | Creative, Model & Gamer. ✊🏽
London, UK
Joined January 2012
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Pinned Tweet
February Gym update: Weight loss snuck up on me
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“sToP maKiNg EvERythING aBouT rAcE”
Black couple's home is valued £345,000 more after white friend pretends she owns it
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My mum reading the £3 shop receipt next to the cashier to see if they scammed her
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“Just say you hate me and you want me dead”
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That’s 45p worth of yoghurt on that lid
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Some people actually take liking IG stories as flirting? Lol don’t mix me in that and disappoint yourself
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Her ancestors told her to chicken the seasoning
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There’s certain foods you can’t cheap out on - ketchup is one of them
This is an enormous price difference for such similar products and I naturally went with the Heinz
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That “1 minute left” on the washing machine moving more like 10 minutes
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Need people to understand when I say “text me when you get home” I’m not saying it for conversation filler I genuinely mean it
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Finally checked my bank account after saying “we outside” 3 weeks ago.. Yeah I’m saying “we inside” now 😭
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You’ve won UK. Enjoy the rain I hope it makes you very happy. Dear lord, what a sad little country you are UK.
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Don’t know why its slyly jarring me every time they call it Top Boy season 2 when its actually season 4 😭
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Managed to finish 2 tins of vaseline without losing them 🤝
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London clearly wasn’t built for 35°+ weather got bins melting out here 🤣
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Wood Green finally upgraded and put in a free swimming pool
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I’ve got McDonalds money but I don’t have McDonalds delivery charge money 🤧
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All you lot know is pre-drinks but if I say lets pre-eat now I’m suddenly mad??
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Before getting annoyed at someone’s late reply/no reply, did you stop and think about that person’s mental & emotional state currently?
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This was also one of the best levels in the Incredibles game
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I seasoned chicken last night for today completely forgetting its Good Friday
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I’m in the gym and this person in here is drinking a magnum???
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Somebody said it init not me but they said its 10/10, would recommend and I hear them still but I wasn’t the one that said it
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This year I’ve been to:
1) Bed
2) Fridge
3) Hell
4) & Back
5) ???
6) Depression
7) Croydon
This year I’ve been to:
1) Faro
2) Lisbon
3) Paris
4) Singapore
5) Bali
6) Thailand
7) Tokyo
8) Marseille
9) Malaga
10) New York City
Alhamdulilah man I’m so grateful 😭
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Ite bet
Wait men you don’t wrap your towel round yourself from your chest area? Just waist down? 😂😂 you lot are weird 🤣🤣
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“Small pick me up”
Small pick me up caught on camera, and you guys have assembled like 11-year-old Sunday school kids. It's incredibly embarrassing.
Just say you still have the mindset of a sheltered pre-teen and go
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“Not you about to squirt, its giving Pacific Ocean”
When y’all be talking a girl through her nut, what y’all be saying 👀
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If I won the lottery, I wouldn’t tell anyone but there would be signs
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Nothing more needs to be said.
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This Sunday was special cause the currygoat and roti came out
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McDonalds you’re not forgiven for removing them breakfast items…. But we can work through this together
OMG McDonald’s are bringing out a chicken Big Mac next week 😍
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Everyday seggz. Maybe I just want to play the floor is lava with you or something smh
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Especially if its pink lady apple juice its only lasting 30 mins max
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Jerk chicken legs, corn and fresh salad cause I wanted something abit lighter ✊🏽
Got in around 5am and haven’t been able to sleep so I started no rules breakfast early today to do the trick
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You sexing Moses??
When his room looks like this you KNOW the dick is LIFE CHANGING...
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Oxtail & White rice
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“You’re a nasty piece of work”
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When I step out one day and my beard is braided, everybody must face their front
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How can I go to my boys birthday and eat his whole cake 🤣
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Unclipping her bra with one hand while she’s unclipping my durag >>>>
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@ashindestad
This why most of us in this London claim our own countries first and foremost 😂
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“Run me that number”
Teezandos showing how she moves to mandem 💀💀 "Run me that number" 😂😂
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Midday nap pending 🤝
Lasagna and jerk chicken for breakfast mad? Doing it anyway cause who’s going to stop me
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Ppl that eat rice with a fork
iPhone users aside, what other group of people think they are better than everybody?
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You lot still lose your vaseline? I’ve just finished my 3rd one
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Not talking to somebody everyday anymore is so weird cause now who do I have all these inside jokes with when I see something funny? Smh
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Day 0 vs Day 30. Not big news or anything but I’ve hit 30 days in the gym consecutively now 💪🏽
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Attempted mac & cheese for the first time. For a first time, we did the damn thing 🫵🏽
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All before 1pm on a Sunday I’ve already seen people defend a r*pist and moist yutes doing homophobia and transphobia for clout? Sick individuals.
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Women be the ones that initiate this whole interaction too. True criminals
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Ignore everyone, real ones know Extra hot is only a tingle
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You jump in the shower and now suddenly EVERYBODY in the house wants to turn on all the taps
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Finally ran into
@osowxvyy
today and he really does look like his DP - this guy’s too cool man 🤟🏽
I don’t know why but some of my mutual’s DP (thats not of them) have become so engrained in my head that if we ever met and you don’t look like that I’ll be disappointed 🤣
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Need to start selling front this cost of living isn’t making sense
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“I’ve got food for you”
Me:
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UK Police:
Police are still unable to explain why their powers are disproportionately used on people from black, Asian and minority ethnic backgrounds, a watchdog has said
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This but when she’s driving and I’m in the passenger seat >>>
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Limiting people’s access to you and watching them realise it is the funniest thing to watch because who told you to be that comfortable doing what you was doing
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Me staring at myself in the self checkout camera while waiting for the receipt
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“You’re going to cause trouble” then rerouted to “not with those dreads”… I had canerows in…😭
Black men what’s the worse excuse you’ve heard from bouncers when you’ve been denied entry to a venue?
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Ok we’ve gone too far now.
Oxtail pancakes? You oxtail warriors must be stopped 😭!!!!
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James & the Giant Peach
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