
oneeyedalpaca
@OneEyedAlpaca
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Following
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°forklift certified° °thinks you're pretty neat° °father of four girls with E names°
pnw
Joined June 2011
welcome to alpacaville here's your giant bag of candy don't eat it all at once, you'll need some for later
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my coworkers do NOT appreciate when i bring unc mode to the overtime shift
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this is so cringe, i will never eat at chipotle ever again
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me: but it's friday, practically the weekend! how can you expect me to... what's the word you used? boss: ... me: ... boss: work, i expected you to work
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a money fairy lands on your shoulder and hands you a $50 bill but instructs you to spend it frivolously what are you buying?
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a money fairy lands on your shoulder and hands you a $50 bill but instructs you to spend it frivolously what are you buying?
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type of seattle autist who goes to slutcon hoping to mingle with fellow fans of the south lake union transport system
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alternate joke: i guess that's on me for assuming that huel pb meant peanut butter
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in hindsight, i should have been suspicious when they introduced huel peanut butter flavor
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An interesting part that's not talked about a lot about Noah's arc is that he was mocked relentlessly about being wasteful for building an arc
🇺🇸 The E.P.A. canceled a $20M flood protection grant for Alaska’s Native village of Kipnuk in May, calling it “wasteful DEI spending.” On Sunday, Kipnuk was devastated by floods that destroyed homes and left residents stranded. - NYT
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