The son I gave up for adoption is 47 yrs old today. I don't know where he is, or how he is, and I will likely never know. But I think of him all the time—more so, as I age and become ever more aware of my own mortality—and I hope he is well and happy and, most importantly, loved.
65 today, and still cutting the necks out of my ratty white t-shirts. As Mom used to say: comfort before beauty. I am grateful for every year, even the hard ones, especially the hard ones. Grateful for my loving family and friends, and for this beautiful, heartbreaking world.
@annasproul
Late thirties is a gorgeous time. In hindsight, though, I would have traveled more. I would've made more space for failing at various creative enterprises, because there are decades yet to improve.
@alyssawaking
I hope so, with all my heart. I did write him a letter and it's waiting in his file at the adoption agency. They will pass it on. All he has to do is ask for it. But so far, that hasn't happened.
I’m overwhelmed at everyone’s kindness. Twitter so often feels like standing in the middle of a freeway and shouting into the wind. But not today. Love—and courage —to all. Thank you for listening.
Bloomberg says that women are leaving the workforce because of ... menopause? Companies are "taking notice" at loss of productivity due to "symptoms"? Oh, ffs. Older women are better at getting shit done than just about anyone. Fuck the patriarchy!
The one person my husband knows well who was a rabid Fox-watching Trump supporter called Vinnie this morning to say that the debate changed his mind. He’s voting for Biden.
@alexanderchee
The window for accomplishing anything of significance is small. Manchin is like Lieberman, destroying something we desperately need just because he can. It's so discouraging.
For those of you who've cleaned out a late parent's home, what was the most surprising thing you found? (For me, it was a box of bullets. My mother had no gun, had no interest in guns, had never fired a gun, etc. It was baffling.)
@Caitlyn_Emery
My daughters did this with my husband, their stepfather. It was my older girl's first act as an atty after passing the bar. Tears all round.
@pughug2
I've done that. As it turns out I'm adopted myself, and 23&me turned up 2 half-sisters on my birth father's side. After brief communication w/the child of one, the sisters decided they didn't want any contact. It was too tumultuous for them. Very hard. Nothing on my son, though.
Had cabin fever, so I went up into the Hollywood Hills and parked at a lookout on Mulholland Drive, and I gazed down upon the San Fernando Valley for a while, exchanging words with a handsome young fella standing ten feet away, who happened to be Harry Styles.
#CovidLA
Impossible to express how proud Vinnie and I are of our amazing, amazing daughter
@erinfordc
. She ran a helluva campaign, filled with heart and smarts and respect for all citizens of DC. Nothing can keep her down. Like everyone else, we can’t wait to see what comes next.
Results be damned -
@erinfordc
won. She won because she showed people in DC that they have a voice, that they matter. Erin made us believe that we deserve better than Bowser, Mendelson, and the other big money cronies. The trail is blazed. There is no going back. Onward!
Nice profile of our daughter Erin in the Washington City Paper. She's running against a 20-year incumbent who is certain she isn't a threat. I say: Just watch.
Bday pic (w/my 3rd child). It's raining in LA, and I've got lotsa state-of-the-world anxiety, financial anxiety, creative anxiety. But I'm here! Coming up on the 3rd anniv of my cancer surgery & still all good. So grateful for my precious family and dear friends. This is 66.
Yesterday, I got some unhappy medical news. I also wrote a poem. The grace of one rescued me from the despair of the other. It made me grateful to be alive. I am late to the genre, with all the zeal of any new convert, but holy hell, poetry saves.
Mammo was clear! I'm good for another six months. What a relief. Thank you to everyone who sent good thoughts my way—your kindness means so much to me.
Just listened our daughter Erin's first hour-long NPR interview re her campaign for DC Council chair. (What a surreal experience.) She is such a fine human being. I am so proud!
A poem:
I fucking hate the dishes
Why are there so many fucking dishes
fuck fuck fuck fuck
Are the dishes fucking?
because they multiply like rabbits
fucking fuck
Daughter just finished up her first DC Council candidates’ debate. She did great. Smart, focused, reasonable, and compassionate. Wish we lived there so I could vote for her!
Well, this happened. Many thanks to the good people
@VQR
for the care they took with my story, which is set in LA early in the pandemic, right after the George Floyd protests in my own West Hollywood neighborhood. Link:
I want to read the first sentence of the first fiction you ever published. (Here's mine, from my novel ALL SAINTS: "Harlan Desonnier sat on his bunk in the white prisoners' dormitory of Angola's Camp E, dangling his cold hands between his knees."
Next week, I will be traveling to Washington, DC for the final two weeks of
@erinfordc
's campaign for Council Chair. Can't wait to see our daughter and SIL and the three grandsons. Can't wait to be live-and-in-person help. Will be canvassing, so here's hoping for mild weather.
This might be one of my favorite campaign photos (thank you Team!). Today my anemia is kicking my ass, my kids were a challenge, I am underwater on meetings and emails. But I’m gonna keep working.
I am done with radiation! So tonight Vinnie is making broiled lobster tails and fresh asparagus to celebrate. Chocolate mousse for dessert. A split of champagne. ... Please know how grateful I am to the many friends and strangers here who sent kind wishes. It means so much. ❤️
I have a 6-month followup mammogram tomorrow, to make sure that hinky spot they saw in January hasn't grown. Not expecting bad news—they were 97% sure it was benign—but it's always worrying, especially after my experience last year. Wish me luck.
@RachelMcKibbens
Oh, no. Reading about your dad was heartbreaking. That your brother, stubborn and impossible as it seemed he was, is now gone too ... I don't know you at all, Rachel, but sending love and light.
Husband called to say that at a work meeting a colleague (whom I've never met) quoted a line from one of my essays. I AM FLABBERGASTED. This might be better than a NYT review.
I wrote about Anthony Bourdain, his life and death, and above all the singular body of work he created which has at times been obscured by his suicide.
1/2
@melissachadburn
is a force of nature. This piece is thoughtful and fair-minded, a year in the making, and all through that time, Melissa's determined pursuit of the truth never wavered.
@maudnewton
@NewYorkStateAG
I can't get over how T had to state that he'd abused the donated funds for his own political gain. That alone should be enough to impeach him.
Electioneering has stopped, but pictures of the candidate
@erinfordc
and her mom have not. On a cleaning jag in between writing sessions and found this one from 1997.
Husb is in beautiful Northern CA, staying with friends (bad timing for me—I stayed home to work). This bobcat was outside their kitchen window. If you zoom in, the eyes are haunting.
@kacesays
I am sorry to hear this. I’m adopted myself and thru 23&me found 2 half-sisters on my birth father’s side. They declined contact—too tumultuous for them. It is very hard. Love to you.
Good news, bad news, good news, bad news. What a whiplash of a day. But okay: here's some good: I sold a short story to one of my favorite lit journals. Hallelujah.
@MarcosSGonsalez
@lithub
Ah this is so good. I recently rewatched the BBC’s Pride and Prejudice, and while I still love it, I was so bothered by shot after shot of white people tra-la-ing thru the countryside, and the huge houses, and fortunes, no thought of other lives or where the money came from.
Erin had 60+ volunteers—ordinary citizens—collecting signatures to get her on the ballot for Council Chairwoman. She thanked all volunteers publicly by name and had a get-together for them. DC needs new leadership. Vote
@erinfordc
, and in the mayoral race:
@RobertWhite_DC
.
Finding volunteers to collect signatures can be a challenge for DC politicians...unless you're the mayor.
I found about half of all of Bowser's petition circulators also happened to be DC employees. It's not illegal, per se, but it walks up to the line:
One of my husband's best friends had a heart attack yesterday and died. He didn't have heart problems and was generally in good health, so it was unexpected. Any of us can go anytime. Hold your dear ones close.
I have been a lucky woman this year. Gratitude and love to family, friends, colleagues, and Twitter pals, and to my doctors at UCLA who got me thru cancer in a pandemic. Special love to my husband Vinnie. "Will you still need me, will you still feed me ... ?"
@erinfordc
@efcmitchell
Also! It wasn’t just a vote against Mendo. Erin genuinely inspired people. They saw in her the possibility of actual good government.
This photo was taken by my husband around the time that we fell in love. You can see it in my eyes. 32 years later, I still feel the same. Happy Valentines Day, dear V—and to all!
Currently reading
@RPMirabella
's Brother & Sister Enter the Forest (bc I saw it everywhere on here, don't let anyone tell you Twitter doesn't sell books). Can report that it's terrific, gracefully written and emotionally devastating.
The son I gave up for adoption is 47 yrs old today. I don't know where he is, or how he is, and I will likely never know. But I think of him all the time—more so, as I age and become ever more aware of my own mortality—and I hope he is well and happy and, most importantly, loved.
Sunday walk after the rain. Photo taken near Griffith Park Observatory in LA. The air hasn't been this clear since the early days of pandemic lockdown.
My husband is 71 & over the last year he made a new friend who's like a brother-from-another-mother to him. Feels like a miracle. V & I have colds & this guy brought us chicken soup, then we sat outside & talked about film (& acting), books, politics, the beauty of the sky.
Years ago, before we had excellent insurance through UCLA, a broker advised me to lie about both having had acne as a teenager and my torn rotator cuff because these were pre-existing conditions. She said either the premium would be unaffordable or I'd be denied coverage.
Delighted to announce the winners of the Chapter One Prize for novelists! Congratulations to
@Karen_Palmer
(1st)
@VictoriaMBell
(2nd) and
@JMcCannWriter
(3rd) for their exceptional, winning chapters, chosen out of 671 submissions. Learn more:
Got a rejection from a contest saying I'd made the longlist. More interesting, though, is that they took the time to write a detailed paragraph about the essay's strengths (they didn't mention its weaknesses, lol). Anyway, they *read* it and thought about it, which is nice.
That video of Charles radiating annoyance while he swipes his hand just above the desk in order to get some servant to remove an item he could easily have pushed aside himself—Wow. An entire life contained in a single gesture. No novelist could do better.
2 yrs since I tweeted this. And now he is 49. I was a young teen when I gave up my son & still have not found him. Haven't found my own birth mother either. But I have learned a lot @ adoptees' suffering. For those who struggle & fight, I am with you.
#adopteevoices
The son I gave up for adoption is 47 yrs old today. I don't know where he is, or how he is, and I will likely never know. But I think of him all the time—more so, as I age and become ever more aware of my own mortality—and I hope he is well and happy and, most importantly, loved.
Four years ago I was stranded in Rome, with very little money and (at first) no place to stay. I had a hell of a time anyway. This is one of my favorite photographs, taken outside the Parthenon, during a brief pause in the rain.
It's a constant struggle to get past the feeling that no one cares about your writing. Because, frankly, they don't, and why should they? People have lives. So you have to care. It's the only way it gets done.