I Don’t Know
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I am BEGGING y’all to read at least one book on domestic violence bc this isn’t being a girls girl, this is helping to isolate a victim further bc she didn’t respond how you wanted her to
Yep. I lost a friend b/c I refused to stand in her wedding when she was marrying a man that had put his hands on her.
She also proposed.
Apparently I was jealous.
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Very few victims, if they haven’t yet accepted that they’re being harmed, are going to just up and leave when told to which is why it’s to important to support in other ways if you truly care
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In regard to “she didn’t cut her off, the friend did” yeah bc she told her friend, a victim of abuse, I can’t support this bc you are being abused. Most victims react poorly to being told they are being abused if they haven’t accepted that yet
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I’m not saying that OP should’ve stayed in the wedding, that didn’t happen, but there are other ways she could’ve gone about it while still trying to be supportive for her friend
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There are so many better ways that she could’ve gone about not going to the wedding without trying to force her friend to accept something she wasn’t ready to yet
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@moralredemption
I didn’t misunderstand the tweet, she treated her friend, a victim, in the exact way you’re not supposed to which explains why she got cut off
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@kylaaslatt
She didn’t have to go to the wedding, but there are better ways to get out of it than telling a victim of abuse that you won’t go bc they are being abused, especially if said victim hasn’t accepted that yet
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In regard to “she didn’t cut her off, the friend did” yeah bc she told her friend, a victim of abuse, I can’t support this bc you are being abused. Most victims react poorly to being told they are being abused if they haven’t accepted that yet
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In regard to “she didn’t cut her off, the friend did” yeah bc she told her friend, a victim of abuse, I can’t support this bc you are being abused. Most victims react poorly to being told they are being abused if they haven’t accepted that yet
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ALSO, leaving an abusive relationship is the most dangerous time for a victim, so expecting the friend to leave without any preparation can be deadly
I am BEGGING y’all to read at least one book on domestic violence bc this isn’t being a girls girl, this is helping to isolate a victim further bc she didn’t respond how you wanted her to
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@nuihyuns2
Staying friends doesn’t mean she’s encouraging her to be with him…but to answer your question, the best thing to do would just to be there for her. If the friend is telling her bad things that’s he’s doing, being able to listen and
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This is why we were unsatisfied when ppl “apologized” for participating in the hate campaign against Amber. Very few actually did the introspection to understand why they fell for it and now the cycle is being repeated again
Watching TikTok do the same thing to Jonathan Majors’ ex they did to Amber Heard is scary as hell given that she is NOT a public figure (so her name should never have been released to the public), she did not go to police, & she’s actively worked against the prosecution
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@nuihyuns2
And gently reassure her that she doesn’t deserve that without naming the experience for her and then if/when the friend is ready to leave she can help through that as well
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@extatophyte
In regard to not being in/going to the wedding, giving literally any other reason outside of your friend being abused to not go
And to support the friend in general, just be there to listen, tell her she doesn’t deserve to be treated poorly without trying to force her to accept
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This tweet pisses me off so bad…the problem isn’t this specific coat, but that depop girlies buy a ton of stuff from thrift stores and resell at 5x the price which is literally causes those stores to raise their prices
$120 for a vintage leather coat is astoundingly reasonable.
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The amount of ppl saying “she was in x position so she lied” as if there’s only one way/position for someone to be raped is killing me
// rape
the way the comments are full of “i knew it!” and ppl picking the story apart. meanwhile the source is the accused rapist & the proof is a video where the girl wasn’t even aware she was being recorded like i fucking hate y’all
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I’m a little confused bc r*pe is a form of SA and saying that using SA instead can cause misunderstandings kinda implies that r*pe is automatically more traumatic than other forms of SA which can be invalidating to survivors
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These are some of the postcards I’ve made to mail to my representatives
Artists this is the time to let the world know the strength of your will and heart: Paint, draw, write, sing in their stead, make the world know your outrage, your sorrow, your empathy and your pain!
QRT with your own art in support of palestine!
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Ngl it’s kinda weird to call women dumb when financial abuse is one of many reasons why most women can’t just up and leave…
Idc what anyone says you are a crash dummy of a woman in this day and age if you choose to not have enough money to deuce out on a man whenever you have to. Won’t ever be no one income in my household even if he got enough money to take care of us comfortably.
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While this was probably about Alex. A lot of people need to give Ariel grace as well. I’ve already seen people say they’ve lost respect for her since she might stay…
“the internet has a tendency to be a lot harsher towards women than men” i think this statement from eugene combined with the phrasing about checkin in with the employee is a reminder that y’all need to be more considerate of the power dynamics here just like they clearly have.
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Someone who’s been groped can have the same amount of trauma as someone who’s been r*ped and I think we should be aware of how we have these convos as to not minimize others
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@extatophyte
That she’s being abused and if/when she’s ready to leave offer support her then as well
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I know this tweet means well, but I don’t like saying that she did everything “right” because there’s no one right way to be a victim.
And as far as the victim, she did EVERYTHING right. She reported it, she went to the hospital, she took it upon herself to figure out his identity . No wrong doing on her whatsoever . She doesn’t deserve ANY of the trolling shit
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@chescaleigh
This is how I know he doesn’t want to take accountability bc instead of just accepting that he’ll keep being called out for missing the mark, he’s just being so defensive about it
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I feel like the people pleasing discourse is flying dangerously close to being mutual abuse is possible discourse
I might make a video on this, but I get why many folks get upset with "people pleasing is always manipulative" discourse.
it pretty dangerously echoes the rhetoric used to ignore violence against women and children. Abusers *love* to accuse their victims of manipulation.
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This is why I don’t like a certain someone’s content bc people have been using it as fuel to say harassment doesn’t happen to women at gyms
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@jjadddeeeee
But I would not try to force her to see that it’s an abusive relationship if it wasn’t something she’d already come to terms with. And when she was ready to leave I’d be there to support her whether it’s just listening, helping find a new place, etc
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I really hate this take for multiple reasons, but mainly bc this wasn’t just “Ned cheated on his wife”, there’s a lot more to it than that
the try guys describing their coworker cheating on his wife as their "trauma" is a great example of how the internet has taken important therapy language and bastardized it into silly little nothings
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I’m glad they decided to publish this now with all of the misinformation that’s been spreading
EXCLUSIVE: Two dozen sources tell
@RollingStone
that Jonathan Majors was abusive with his partners, aggressive on sets, and a source of “toxicity” at Yale.
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It’s really nice to see that see that she has supportive people in her life! 🥹
I’m honoured to be friends with my sheroes: Amber Heard & my feminist friends
@Eve_Barlow
@DrJessTaylor
@Jaimi_Shrive
@KimM_C
. We are a community supporting victims.
We stood with Amber from the start & I will always stand with her & every survivor both in and outside of court.
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This is why I hate when people joke that incels are just “creepy men living in their parents basement” bc a lot more men align with incel beliefs than we realize and they can be very dangerous
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@chief_reign
Just because abuse isn’t being mentioned specifically doesn’t mean we shouldn’t be mindful of how we discuss these things
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The next time a strike is called for we can be better prepared and make it more impactful
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Even if she hadn’t reported it, didn’t go to the hospital, etc her experience is still valid and she deserves to be believed and not harassed
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It should be noted that even if he’s found “not guilty” in court doesn’t mean he’s innocent
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As an aspiring content creator, THIS IS NOT ABOUT US. You made a skit with misinformation about what you were going to do before there was more information instead of just waiting for more guidelines
Not going to lie, instead of truly educating us through this new challenging time in an effort to help the strike, we’re getting conflicting reports and punished online for it. I was called a liar, a scab, and attacked for FOLLOWING SAG Guidelines and Contracts
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Tbh, this is why I save my energy/care for Black women
It’s okay to make jokes about Meg getting shot but the whole Black community supposed to go up anytime something happens to a male rapper. 🥱
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@angelikaoles
@agracia623
I never expected her apology to be good but this is way worse than I could’ve ever imagined
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@Mirababy10
First of all, her telling her friend that didn’t help her see the reality so you’re wrong there
OP is allowed to have boundaries, but I don’t think this was the best way to go about it if she cares about her friend the way she says she did
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The only reason why I point this is out is that saying things like this effect how we think/feel about out victims
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*the actors that work with him. Multiple crew members have stated that they’ve been treated poorly by him
i think it’s funny how nearly everyone that works with sam levinson loves him but the general population thinks he’s the worst
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“You are a crash dummy of a woman if you choose to not have enough money to deuce out on a man whenever you need” ignores the circumstances that put women in that position
Tell me you can’t comprehend what you read without telling me you can’t:
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Also, how many people praising him supported or still support Kayne???
incredible that his response to being accused of misogyny was saying that julia “lay down and let her pork chop be penetrated” and 200,000 people ate it up. kinda makes me feel sick tbh
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@jjadddeeeee
Personally I probably would’ve gone to the wedding 🤷🏾♀️
In general, I would’ve kept being her friend and just been there to listen. If she told me ways that he’s harming her, I would tell her that she doesn’t deserve it and try to help her to take the blame
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I understand that from an abolitionist pov that prisons are bad, but isn’t a big point that you’re supposed to listen to survivors and clearly they want him in prison so write a leniency letter directly contradicts the ppl you’re supposed to be listening to
Just an insane ass tweet. Prison is unconscionable but drugging and raping women isn’t? Toting yourself as a champion of anti sex trafficking and you defend a rapist isn’t unconscionable? Just a nasty ass account with awful politics and lapdog followers
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A lot of y’all are being disingenuous with their take. One, there was so little info about today’s strike that most ppl didn’t know about it and/or know that the call came from Palestinian people. Two, and this isn’t to say that you shouldn’t try
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What frustrates me the most about this is that most survivors are well aware that they won’t get justice through the current system, but when they ask this question they mostly get non responses (I’ve read through some of these and they don’t answer)
all the abolitionists i know are rape victims so i don't believe this.
anyway, there's decades of feminist media dedicated to this. It's not hard to find.
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It seems that he’s benefitted by having someone that’ll do most of the work in their relationship, being the center of attention, and he has his needs and goals prioritized
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To participate in today’s strike, but in general there’s a lot that needs to be put in place for it to be effective. Instead of just shitting on this person maybe we should be looking at ways we can be better involved in our communities so
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@nie_dziekuje
@heardsstan
She wore a shirt with R Kelly’s face on it a few years ago and still wears Alexander Wang’s clothing
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I have three thoughts
1. It would have been one of the few scenes to discuss a potential “consequence” of sex
2. It’s great for her development, as stated
3. It was a good use of the fish eye lens!!
WHY WAS THIS DELETED THIS SCENE IS ACTAULLY ESSENTIAL AND FORWARDS BELLA'S DEVELOPMENT WTF.
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Obviously I shouldn’t have had to think about that, but I choose to work with and protect those kids
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I think it’s odd to say we need to leak her name without stopping and thinking about what she wants
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If you want to learn more about this, read “Why does he do that?” by Lundy Bancroft!
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And because of that a lot of ppl would rather hold onto the very slim possibility of getting justice through what we have now instead of diving head first into something where no one truly addresses what we can do
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Obviously I don’t know their relationship so this might not be true but it seems like a decent explanation for why he’s with her despite making clear that he doesn’t like her
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This is weird bc not everyone (including black ppl) see her as white passing unlike someone like Halsey…
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If this doesn’t work for you, try using nizoral shampoo once a week! Put it in your scalp and let it sit for 7-10minutes then continue with the rest of your routine
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@keatingssixth
You can keep streaming and watching movies legally, they haven’t called for a boycott on that
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And since she’s so into him, he can always use the “well I chose you” line to continuing getting his way by making her think that she should be “grateful”
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Putting her name out there might cause a lot of more media attention than she wants rn and since we DONT know her personally maybe we shouldn’t encourage that and let HER decide to speak when she’s ready
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Do we have a new Kerry Washington and Tony Goldwyn???
he dgaf about what they talking about he said “look at the dress” asgnfnd crazy.
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If only there were TWO other really popular, highly played games that you could stream instead of the wizard game to raise money 🤔
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My suggestions to become a better cook are to read some cookbooks, ideally ones that talk about the science behind cooking. Watch videos from cooks, ones that have a deep understanding of cooking, technique, and flavor. And practice!
- a former bad cook
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One time I posted a dress I made inspired by mirror palais and someone asked if they, as a beginner, would be able to make it
I was truthful and told them probably not, considering it was a challenging project for me and I have a lot of sewing experience
This is why I don’t understand when a particularly rabid type of sewist says making your own clothes is cheaper than buying them. You’re valuing your own time at $0? We’re trying to encourage people to value sewing labor, and you’re doing exactly the opposite? Make it make sense.
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Can I be really real rn? Knowing that she survived and is likely healing from incredibly traumatic injuries…maybe she doesn’t want her name out there right now?
That's why I really wanted to know the name of this woman. She deserves the same recognition for her bravery. Unfortunately not a single journalist broke the rules (something I always thought is part of a journalist's job)
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Last thing, I do think these are very brave acts and I do want people to talk about them, but I want us to remember that they are also real people
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I was a teenage working with children when we had to have conversations about what to do if we had an active shooter and I prepared myself to protect those kids if necessary… I think y’all are just shitty people
y’all crazy if you think that signing up to babysit for 10 bucks an hour means signing up to sacrifice yourself. also the intruder has a weapon??? not saying I wouldn’t feel horrible about it but it’s either the child dies or we both die so….
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Nothing beats reading the Letterboxd reviews of a bad movie
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I think we should talk about what she did and how the media didn’t cover it as they should have and still take into consideration her privacy
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I’m sorry but I’m not supporting Selena I won’t pick sides during blm Gomez
Selena literally just got into with her organ donor a few months ago like all of these people are horrible 😭😭
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I think almost anyone can cook
With that being said, strictly following a recipe doesn’t guarantee that your food will be good for a few reasons.
1. Most recipes have hidden steps that aren’t intuitive if you don’t cook often
2. Not all recipes are good
people so mad in the comment section of this tiktok but shes so real for this
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Are we really surprised at the boy’s reaction given the reaction of the dad?
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But apparently I don’t have reading comprehension skills for know it’s more nuanced than “just have enough money” 🤷🏾♀️
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I really like when he says “we’ve said goodbye before so it stands to reason that we’ll say hello again”
now I’m mad at you guys for clowning that “what is grief if not love preserving” line from that one show like I’m on the record for not giving a single solitary fuck about marvel but idk they spilled with that one man
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Austin’s method so you know he’d start dating him after
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And while the current system doesn’t do that (most of the time) when no one gives an answer to what we will actually do differently it makes sense why so many ppl are hesitant to adopt these principles, especially when y’all talk down to ppl who ask
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I have a lot of thoughts, but something I’d like to point out is that TikTok likely knows what these phrases/terms actually mean and can still flag for them
I will never forgive tiktok for making it common place for ppl to censor themselves so much that I'm seeing ppl use aughts era internet phrases/letter and number combinations as fill ins. i cannot believe i'm seeing seggs and s3x in 2023
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What makes this worse is that you’re being a classic yt woman rn rather than just admitting that maybe this wasn’t the best time to critique the semantics of a 19 year old being harassed by a 40 year old rapist and trafficker
Truly blessed 🙏🏻 to have been severely bullied in real life long before anyone tried to dog pile me on the internet
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Y’all say this under the guise of being “helpful” when you’re really just a bad friend. Boundaries exist for a reason, and you can easily tell your friend that you can’t be their main support through this without just cutting them off
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Even though I hold some abolitionist ideals, I can’t consider myself one bc of this. Especially when I’ve seen so many (not OP) who refuse to center and listen to survivors
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Portraits don’t always look great, but THIS ONE is absolutely amazing!
Got my first tattoo today, a portrait of my late husband 💗 glad I’ll always have him with me in more ways than one.
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One could easily say that a victim who is people pleasing or has a fawn response is manipulating the person harming them…which is just incorrect
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What I really hate with trying to define what’s “actually traumatic” is that people who’ve been through awful things minimize those experiences bc others have deemed that it’s not valid enough
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This makes me feel embarrassed bc this is what I look like to other people???
sabrina carpenter actually looking her height: a short thread 💌
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And I DO want more ppl to learn how to sew! I just want us to also be honest about it not always being cheap and easy
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I was wondering why he married her when he’s said he didn’t like her, but then I thought about Bancroft’s section on why abusers don’t change
I’m not saying he’s an abuser but I think it’s relevant
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Also, killing a rapist doesn’t get rid of trauma a survivor went/will go through and we need more to offer than just that
People want to talk about killing rapists because it absolves them of the responsibility to support survivors. Centering *us* makes it not about *them*
Which is why with ALL this talk about abuse lately- literally not one standard barer has discussed support of survivors.
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I threw up and passed out after I got mine inserted and the pain was so bad that my OB insisted on taking it out a few minutes later
Studies: “Women don’t need pain control for IUD insertion.”
Women: “This is very painful. We do in fact need pain control.”
OBGYN: “But the studies…”
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Where’s that tweet that describes republicans as an abusive parent and dems as the parent who watches and does nothing??
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No offense, a lot of y’all do not understand how running a business works
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