Himothy McVeigh
@CokeSipper
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lol
The Last Dance.
After 26 years as a head coach, Keith Dambrot will retire at the end of the season.
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Buddy sent me this and now I really want to drink a root beer
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Growing trend of young athletes dating people they probably jacked off to when they were 12
𝗧𝗥𝗘𝗡𝗗𝗜𝗡𝗚:
CJ Stroud has been spotted out with "rapper" Amber Rose, who is best known for dating Kanye West awhile back.
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0-3 since this
Ian Kinsler threw out the first pitch tonight in a Team Israel jersey 🇮🇱
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Every referee should have their home address on the back of their jersey
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This is what should happen when a ref tries to retire and live out his days peacefully
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Everyone loves it when the hot lady bullies this poor autistic man who is addicted to his phone
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It’s very funny to call a guy who sacrificed his career for what he believes in unserious when you picked a strippers name for your epic debate persona
Norm Twinklestein is easily one of the most unserious people I've ever had the misfortune of speaking with. I hope his reading comprehension improves in the future, it's sad that he brags about reading so much when he's apparently only capable of thinking in single quotes.
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Gave up 6 runs in 1 and a half innings and got yanked
Dean Kremer.
Israeli-American dual-citizen. 🇮🇱🇺🇸
Pitched for the Israeli National Team in the World Baseball Classic.
He’s the Orioles starting pitcher for Game 3 of the ALDS tonight.
He has family in Israel. “I still want to pitch, but its gonna be in the back of my head.”
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Funniest outcome of the Hamas attacks is people are doing this again
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Tough day for the “dirtbag left” they’re lacking the approval of homeschooled spastics with federal security clearance
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Walked in to this bar with my drunk ass buddy and he goes up to the pool table and just pushed the balls around a bunch and the people playing got so mad they just walked out lmao
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Honking at the guy in front of me at a red light to make sure he’s ready for it to turn green
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Houston already up 3-0
Ian Kinsler threw out the first pitch tonight in a Team Israel jersey 🇮🇱
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Guy who’s only familiar with college football through Aflac commercials voice:
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How about me and my boys turn your hole in to hardcore history Dan?
There are lots of grievances Palestinians could cite that deserve attention. Actions like those of this week close the ears of many who might be willing to listen/help. This plays into the hands of hardliners on both sides. Pity the civilians (on both sides) are victimized.
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If i was a star nba player playing against the lakers i would point at Larry David after every shot i made to make it look like we had beef for fun
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At Michigan games they play the Killers to hype up the crowd. I’m Europe they make songs about genocide and throw flares at players
The European mind cannot comprehend that the largest European soccer stadium would be the 9th largest American college football stadium
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@BarrelJumpist
It’s insane how angry Americans get that they’re not allowed to just murder homeless people in the street
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So true. They should have Gameday in Tel Aviv and get Corso to play the heel and pick Hamas
Jewish students at Univ of Washington respond to the rally, "They want our people dead. They want us killed." If that is the site where GameDay will be Saturday AM; oh man, I just don't know.
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Analytics moving closer and closer to phrenology by the day
📊 Sneak peak at a new metric I've been working on, which attempts to quantify "Basketball IQ" 💡
A full writeup with methodology and data table will be available in the next day or two.
#NBA
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“Hell I could eat”
kinda fucked up that english doesn’t have an equivalent to bon appétit, sahten, buen provecho, etc???
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40 year old man watching dolphin porn to heal a torn Achilles
Aaron Rodgers explaining on
@PatMcAfeeShow
how the sounds of Dolphins mating is healing to the body.
I’m so here for this rehab process
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You can very clearly hear a guy in the lakers space overtaking people on the freeway and you can hear the Waze app telling him directions and everyone is accusing him of being drunk
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The nation should be watching an nfl playoff game right now. Sadly the pathetic Buffalo bills and woke fascism of the state of New York is denying you this
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Most hygienic Boston appreciator
NYC is going the way of Chicago — second tier in every meaningful sense.
Boston is better as a global city/financial center, Worcester has a stronger creative scene, and Malden is 10x better for missionary technologists.
When not in EU, I’ll be spending more time in Lowell.
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Hoping the Burrow injury drives this guy to a private Pyle style psychotic break
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The most advanced hand dryer technology they’ll ever develop will always be inferior the brown paper towel dispenser
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he ruptured his Achilles 4 snaps in to his jets career after they did a 30 minute segment pregame about how he was manifesting a Super Bowl
BREAKING:
#Jets
HC Robert Saleh says that they’re expecting an MRI to confirm a ruptured Achilles for Aaron Rodgers
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Sam Presti took a pedophile over Franz Wagner, traded Sengun for picks, traded Jaden McDaniels for Poku, and took Ousmane Dieng over Jalen Duren. Worst GM ever?
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Remember when people could talk about stuff normally. That was nice
Josh Allen is like a human monster truck with the soul of a labradoodle that's fueled by Four Loko.
A singular, unhinged experience.
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@j_a_i_m_j_a_i_m
Was texting my brother about him retiring and he just goes “oh you gotta check the central Michigan section on his Wikipedia”
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@credenzaclear2
Everything you post made so much more sense when you revealed you were homeschooled
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Dropping bombs on hospitals is so exhausting
#Adulting
We Jews are tired.
We’re tired of being murdered and then told our murders didn’t happen.
We’re tired of being dehumanized, our children’s faces torn from lampposts.
We’re tired of being told everyone deserves a home—except us.
We’re tired.
But we’re going to fight. And win.
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God is punishing the giants for paying Daniel Jones and mistreating Saquon
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Making a Negroni while on the precipice of blacking out voice: yeah I’m thinking I’m back
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Median former buzzfeed employee
The median restaurant in Western Europe is called “King Taco Burger Kebab” and mostly serves machine espresso to 58 year old drunks.
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Near fight in the bathroom at a magic game when a guy told a Cavs fan the women’s bathroom was further down the hall
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Ummm, I hate Ian Miles as much as the next guy, but like... I'm gonna go ahead and take the bold anarchist position that people being executed for sedition is bad actually
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Goated Matthew Perry story is when they got him and Chris Farley to make some shitty Lewis and Clark comedy film and the movie sucked but Farley did get Perry addicted to cocaine
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Possibly the least surprising reveal of all time
Amazon billed its "Just Walk Out" stores as some triumph of AI. In reality, it was powered by thousands of low-paid Indian workers manually adding up items in your cart as you shopped.
How insanely dystopian.
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To be clear I’m not doing a bit. I’m not being ironic. If you advocated for Brock Purdy to win the MVP in the NFL you have serious brain problems. Reevaluate everything about your life before you think he’s good. He’s fucking garbage and anyone with eyes can see that
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Twitter just showed me “suggested follows” and it was just a list of people I already follow with the option to press a button to unfollow all of them
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You will never enjoy a cheeseburger in paradise
Jimmy Buffett taught Americans to hate their jobs and live for nights and weekends so they could stuff themselves with food and alcohol. But pride in work is what gives Americans purpose and explains our success. Deaths of despair may be considered part of his cultural legacy.
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If Brock Turdy had won mvp he would have been the worst player in the history of all American sports to receive the award
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If I didn’t want my team to face karmic justice I wouldn’t build a statue of a murderer outside the stadium
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Eagles 1-6 and eliminated from the playoffs since this tweet
Being a fan of a team that comes out and plays 60 minutes of dominant football every week would be fun but being a fan of a team that gives the entire league psychological damage by playing like shit for most of every game and then winning anyway is just so emotionally fulfilling
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You should have taken the short bus to school if you believe this is real
One page labeled “Top Secret” outlines a plan of attack for Kfar Sa’ad, saying “Combat unit 1” is directed to “contain the new Da’at school,” while “Combat unit 2” is to “collect hostages,” “search the Bnei Akiva youth center” and “search the old Da’at school.”
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MLS fans when they see people talking about real sports leagues
Brian Schmetzer: 8 years, 2 league championships, 1 (historic) international championship, 6 cup final appearances. Still going.
He tops Pete Carroll in my book. But Carroll is clearly second.
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“All men think about the Roman Empire” “all men have a favorite plane” please shut the fuck up I’m trying to make important fantasy football decisions
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Everyone who believed them the first time should volunteer themselves as human shields for Hamas if they want to see heaven
Earlier today, the IDF received reports of a hit on the Shifa Hospital in Gaza City. The Hamas-run media office in the Gaza Strip immediately claimed that this was a strike carried out by the IDF.
An examination of IDF operational systems indicates that a misfired projectile…
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Posting a funny tweet in the chat and getting no reactions then someone posts the same tweet 30 minutes later and gets 5 laugh reacts
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I think everyone who’s advocated for Brock Purdy MVP should have to take a sabbatical and study the game for at least a year until they understand what they’re seeing
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Caitlin Clark, I'm so sorry. Today I was part of the problem.
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Saying something you don’t believe to piss someone off >>>>
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What’s funny is them insulting you for being a loser
what’s funny is the whole reason I filmed this was not to mock the proletarian grunts of Boston like some of you closet white supremacist “Marxists” who think I got “owned” believe but to personally document the bar I lived across from for four years being at its all-time busiest
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I’d be way too embarrassed to ever publicly admit writing for The Simpsons at any point after like 2003
just totally randomly thinking about how when I left CONAN (show) Conan (person) told me to use him as a reference wherever it would be helpful. A year-ish later I applied to The Simpsons and listed him as a reference on my resume. they called him and I got the job
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Seeing a lot of people defend this on the timeline when we don’t even know what the woman looks like yet. What if she’s busted?
A British Airways pilot has been sacked after reports he snorted cocaine off a topless woman before trying to fly a passenger plane back to London
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This would be, and I don’t say this lightly, the worst thing that has ever happened in history
“One of the worst-kept secrets in the league is that Orlando, loaded with young talent but not with shooters, might offer Klay a ton of money next summer.” 👀
-
@timkawakami
(Via )
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Difficult to describe the Detroit pistons situation without using the type of language you do for a UN humanitarian crisis
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ESPN’s Ramona Shelburne: “Victor is here and he wants to win... I don’t know how patient he’s going to be (with the
#Spurs
)… I don’t think he wants to sit here at the bottom of the lottery standings.”
#PorVida
#Wemby
#Wembanyama
#NBA
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Least racist Celtics fan
@MatthiasReedV
The Kevin Garnett/Paul Pierce/Ray Allen/Rondo era was my fav and also they have the best white boys
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My sources say the death penalty, for crimes against baseball, being considered for Shohei Othani. I am pro-life and take no pleasure in reporting this.
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They were calling this guy one of the all time greats a couple weeks ago. Pathetic
Caleb Williams shares an emotional moment with his family after the loss
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$700 million I’m getting Iran a Nuke
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@whitebusdriver
Bro can identify laxatives without seeing the label and calling other people bound up
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This giants performance is disrespectful to the victims of 9/11
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Faking a play to try and draw a team offside and calling a timeout should be a 50 yard penalty
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Comrade is in the name my dudes
i get all these armond white-adjacent right wingers following me on letterboxd, thinking that just because i'm an aesthete that i also support their reactionary bullshit. comrade is in the name my dudes, how much more obvious could it get that i'm not your type of critic.
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Inside the nba is the greatest tv show ever made. Second place is the X Files. Third place is House
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