baby doxxer
@youwouldntpost
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crucial to wear your tank tops until the straps are disintegrating. no tank retired before its time
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The Matrix is attacking me.
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respect the game but he needs to work on his caressing.
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he should be at the club.
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kept telling my family that this is the only McDonald’s in the world with turquoise arches but they did not give a shit
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Heartbreaking: The Worst Car You Know Just Made a Great Point.
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the California Real ID has this sick gold bear on it so i was curious what other states had on theirs but it turns out everyone else just has the star. fucking losers
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was anyone else specifically raised to understand that leaving the price tag on a gift is rude. because i remain so vigilant about this even when it doesn’t matter at all lol.
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the city on the other side should be Pittsburgh.
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gotta love how they always tag him.
I summoned my Model Y to back into a parking space and it couldn’t detect the garage above….Oops. @elonmusk
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god damn what a deadbeat lmao.
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it must kill Elon that this far less wealthy tech guy is so much funnier than him
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i don't think that's true.
Prom is AT LEASTTTTTT $20k now. If I were to have a kid it’ll def be around $100k so Ima go ahead and add that to the list of reasons I don’t want kids. Lol.
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it was a great rite of passage to go to a Hooters for the first time as a 14 year old boy and have your excitement instantly overtaken by depression.
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i think we're good on updates until the big one.
Jimmy Carter ‘enjoying peanut butter ice cream’ in hospice care, ally says
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how can you win and still be whining this much.
Joe Rogan says the ‘greatest media psy-op in history’ was waged against Trump: ‘They’ve distorted who he is’
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man fuck you.
Summary of California High Speed Rail Project:.-Originally projected (in 2008) to cost $33 billion; now projected to cost between $88.5 and $127.9 billion .-Estimated completion date was 2020; as of 2024, zero passengers have been transported and the majority has not even been.
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can’t even look at Sacha Baron Cohen these days without thinking of this
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in 2025 i want to see rich people this miserable and steamed all the time while labor holds out for deserved compensation.
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hate how the area around my desk gets so dusty and dirty just because that's where i spend 40+ hours a week shedding skin cells and slowly dying.
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this would not sufficiently injure a cop. tear it out and try again.
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no thanks. they need to adapt that Reddit story about the boyfriend who pretended to not know what potatoes were and took the bit too far.
Sydney Sweeney will star in & produce ‘I PRETENDED TO BE A MISSING GIRL’ at Warner Bros. The thriller is based on a Reddit short story that follows a drifter who impersonates a missing girl to rob a family, only to realize she’s made a terrible mistake. (Source: Deadline)
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can someone let the senile president’s eldest son know that his father’s chief vizier wants to impregnate his teen daughter.
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they’re calling trees woke.
$75 million was awarded to plant trees in places that badly need them. In anti-DEI push, that's over
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they should invent an election that’s not the most important of our lifetime.
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these lyrics seem like they are addressed to a stray dog.
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it's sad that we've forgotten the funniest Trump assassination attempt
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if a chatbot tried to blackmail me i would simply turn my computer off.
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not only is AI art ugly slop that threatens creative livelihoods, it's replacing the inherently funnier and more joyous medium of shittily photoshopped images.
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dropping all my other conspiracy theories for this. lock in
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[to Sydney Sweeney] are these millions of guys bothering you?.
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years ago my weed dealer in New York found out i had published a novel and said he wanted to check it out, so i gave him a copy. on his next delivery he told my ex “that shit is advanced reading,” which remains the nicest way of saying you’re not going to finish someone’s book.
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LAPSED CATHOLIC: yeah one priest was weird we called him Creepy Father Mark haha. only did confirmation to get $50 from my grandma . ADULT CATHOLIC CONVERT: the Holy See’s infallible nature cannot be restored until we sack Avignon for its reliquaries. Pope Francis is woke and gay.
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At the end of a movie I read every credit out loud and say "thank you".
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if i had covid and was offered the chance to retire from the shittiest job in the world i’d be so grateful.
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won’t someone think of the Belgian princesses.
Belgian princess left in doubt about her Harvard future following Trump’s foreign student ban
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it's gonna be so funny when Trump dies and the entire timeline is this image
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what kind of psycho would be running an account like this.
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crazy to think how, despite your best efforts, more and more people will wear whatever clothes and jewelry they like, while you get more and more scared about it for the rest of your life.
This is the Communications Director for the Secretary of Interior:
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Developing an investment portfolio where I buy the dip on companies that conservatives are attacking and then sell a few months later when they’ve forgotten their outrage campaign
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boy the dentist sure loves taking X-rays. always needs more pics of my skull for her little files. she is sooooo obsessed.
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probably the Edmund Fitzgerald.
what was your biggest ship loss? like, the ship you cared about the most that ended badly?.
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come on man.
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this just sent me back to the undergrad workshop where a third of the stories were about getting cheated on by a lacrosse player and i was submitting stuff about feral people living in the New Jersey pine barrens.
The undergrad creative writing class I’m teaching has 19 girls and 1 boy.
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hard to see someone else living your dream (of bulldozing Mercedes and Teslas).
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thinking about one of the hardest Economist headlines of all time
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if you’re impressed by this you should have your driver’s license revoked and be placed under observation by a social worker.
actors are in serious trouble. Tavus just dropped Hummingbird-0, it can lipsync any actor with natural human expression and movement. AI actors can act better now. tutorial and more examples:
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not campaigning has nearly brought him back to life.
Biden: "Yes, Puerto Rico. I'd like to take that guy for a swim out there."
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evangelicals are so washed they’re not even denouncing a widely followed false prophet called “Mr. Beast”.
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this lady really can’t take a shit without letting the world know about it.
Spotted in Austin: “All gender restroom.” On a recent trip to Texas. Um, no. There are only two. Hold the line. Biology isn’t bigotry.
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do college kids still soak gummi bears in vodka or was that a deranged aughts thing.
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this is completely disqualifying for a presidential candidate
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rare earnest post: something all heterosexual men must try to learn (and i am speaking from decades of experience now) is to balance proposed fixes with empathy and emotional support. it’s not that she never wants practical advice, it’s that you skipped a step.
Why do girls hate it when you give them logical solutions instead of babying them ?.
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buddy once explained to me that he never eats Chik-fil-A, not for political reasons, but because “they’re not there for me when I need them,” i.e., when he’s hungover on Sunday and they’re closed.
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this weekend marks the one-year anniversary of my original account going out in a blaze of glory
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i worked in an elite college admissions office (not making acceptance decisions) and can tell young white men with good grades that it’s not underprivileged minorities taking their spots but lacrosse players who totaled their jeep one time.
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the Letterboxd in this guy's head must have gone so hard.
shout-out to this guy on the news calling Batman '89 corny in a Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers shirt
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among the many pleasures of rewatching Arrested Development is being reminded that Michael was always the worst one.
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It’s over: A majority of the pledged DNC delegates have now endorsed Kamala Harris, virtually ensuring she clinches the Democratic nomination on the first ballot. The endorsement of California’s delegation just now put her hundreds of delegates over the threshold needed.
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why do i have to pass a captcha to pay my water and electricity bill. if a bot wants to pick up the tab that's fine.
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everyone rightfully loves the stew line, but underrated Carl Weathers moment in Arrested is when he's on the news at fancy restaurant where the Bluths have caused a riot — completely unharmed, leftovers in hand, saying "I'm looking at $50,000 in medical bills!"
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in college one of my best friends and i would get high and house an entire bag of tostitos hint of lime chips while screaming with laughter at reruns of this era because in every throw to Saget he would describe how he was in a totally unique and personal kind of hell.
📺On May 18, 1997, Bob Saget made his final appearance as host of ‘America’s Funniest Home Videos’
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One of my friends (Jew, 8 figure net worth, mid 30s, handsome) sharing his feelings in the group chat tonight. Trying to reel him back in but he’s got some good points. Thoughts?
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are we ready to talk about this being a weird failed psyop
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The 'Sound of Freedom' saga finally comes full circle as Tim Ballard and the anti-trafficking org he founded are accused of human trafficking in a new federal lawsuit:.
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Ken now has enough of these clips to cut a Life Alert commercial.
77 year old Lt. Gov. of Mississippi Delbert Hosemann collapses on the state senate floor.
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many reasons True Detective S1 hit the way it did: continuity of directing, performances, paranormal tension. but the timeless pleasure here is watching these guys lie about what happened, spliced together with how it really happened.
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LISAN AL GAIB
Pacino should’ve been in Dune just to hear him say all that stuff.
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watch this on mute and try to guess what the music is. you will be wrong .
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didn't realize so many people agreed with me about caressing form.
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unfortunately we're going to need a special exemption that allows George to have a phone in jail.
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remember when salvia was a thing.
Whats the worst drug you tried.
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have to be honest, it makes me uncomfortable to look at Ariana Grande.
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