Is this your beautiful wife?

The one thing that was nice about Seattle was being able to ride the subway for free the whole time I lived there after a homeless guy gave me his transit card in exchange for a half smoked Newport

just met a guy whose fagcent is so extreme that i initially thought it was some kind of disability

Don’t come to my apothecary taking big ass sips of elixir

It’s so beautiful how the city of Newark only exists for the airport

Finally out of twitter jail for telling **** **** to **** *******

I would feel a lot safer if police officers and politicians weren’t allowed to marry/have families and had to become genderless as well as shaved bald. 👼

Old ass lady in the ER room next to me won’t stop screaming about how the nurses are the kkk and plotting to steal her shoes 😭

Somebody gimme a perc please

I’m FINE….. posting for sympathy only

If he wanted to wiretap u he would

Beautiful Day Sunny Morning :)

I think being struck by lightning would permanently change my life for the better

when he takes off your bra and the $40 you stole from him earlier falls out 😔

I have a terminal illness and the only cure is someone spitting in my face

If I was a man, I would rather be short, poor, dumb, ugly, fat, balding and dying than be circumcised

Dominican Republic and Haiti is the Latino Israel-Gaza

Sorry no I don’t want to read your 12 paragraph substack essay titled “confessions of a former slut”

Lowkey been thinking about moving to Ohio recently

Just found out that wherever you go there you are :/

#CurrentlyCryingTo