Vegvísir
@vonsigliere
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@ScuderiaFerrari (ˌvɑn-siˈ-ljɛʀɛ) ||Entertainment Outsourcer.|| Information is Power.
Nairobi-Kenya
Joined December 2011
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Kipii
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This is a Kenyan song guys.
Endeleeni kuumiza madame roho watoe fire content ivi.
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Me to my pals when they give me extra Gin shots and im dying inside
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Watu wa census arrive at a certain home
Interviewer: Where is your husband?
Lady: Ako kazi Kericho
Husband:
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Hii ukitwerkia mwanaume si utampea tetanus
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Eddie Gathegi >>> Lupita Nyongo
Yea, i know you aint ready for that discussion.
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A friend of mine (CID) told me ukiwa approached na wezi na uko solo, usijifanye rambo ata kama unaona hawana bunduki. Give them whatever they've asked for.
Simu na pesa can be replaced but you only have one life to live.
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Lets gooooooo
Gachagua hints at direct flights to Bogotá during talks with Colombian VP
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Alshabaab wakisimbua, lets close bars.
Bandits wakisumbua, lets close bars.
Insecurity in the city, lets close bars.
Corruption on an imaginable scale, lets close bars
Haiti, lets close bars
Walevi ndio punching bag of a failed Cs
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Announcing unakuja Ferrari pole pole
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Si pia wewe unasaka mshikaji na baby daddy wako bado ako hai?
Which is worse?
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Quite a dingy experience, isn't it?
Hope things get better though.
Honestly, Truly as a Private Biker. I am Struggling moving around😭😢
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Uzuri jaba mtu haanzi 3-0
Aluta Kibriit captains mnatumiaga wanawake wenu pesa? Ama kazi ni ku take off flights which never land?
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Nigerians after finding out No Kenyan artiste featured in Lion King sound track
vs
Nigerians learning that Lupita has been given a 'Nigerian role' in Americanah
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Ukidai sinia kama hii tuko based Nyamakima, Downtown opposite stage ya Nuclear. Hoteli inajiita Gatanga
Kilo plus ugali na guac inakuja 850
Karibuni sana
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And you wonder why you were left with a bastard
What men don't understand is that a happy wife = a happy marriage, keep that bed shaking na utakuwa unaoshwa hadi miguu.
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Passaris ni goon, ni rangi na kizungu mingi tu ndio humficha.
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What did being a slut early give you Pat?
Some guys surprise me, like how tf are you 32+ years and you don't have game, you're supposed to be a slut by then 😂
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Tafuteni lorry ya distributor wa EABL area code yenyu zenye hudistribute kwa clabu ununue pombe.
It's cheaper and safer.
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Izo matiti za Mollage naeza zinyonya mwaka mzima na sitawahi kuwa njaa
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When Waititu gets wind that his niece is trending coz of a ninty million cheque.
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@kilundeezy
rafiki.
Do you mind to explain, one account there is Benzo's previous account.
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When i end up getting married instead of having 8 bby mamas..
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Vile ulipasua burger
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Unahepa pombe fake unakunywa maziwa imbo
Hehehehe
So the milk on the left is fake and the one the right is the real mount kenya... 😡😡😡
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Ruto awekwe kwa Guiness world book of records.
Against all odds.
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Hii ndio microphone chebukati ata announce winner monday.
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Unarusha nduano na picha yangu
Itabidi twende devil threesome sasa.
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Mans was an economist, hapendi kuwaste isaa😂
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Ukizidi na aflatoxins si unajua tu zile kangol ni zangu
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I'm a fan of your movies
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Kama dame yako alienda TT, my thots and prayers are with you.
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Mtu hajui vaginal health na ana kuma can't lecture me on anything
Y'all blame sakaja for everything as if mbeleni hakukuwa na Governor mwingine. Whatever is happening now how is it sakaja's fault na aliingia tu kazi juzi juzi. Y'all need to give that dude time
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Haukufunzwa hii brookhouse?
Nimekumbuka kuna siku nimebuy double expresso nikaekewa half a cup nikasimama nikingoja wajaze kikombe buana
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Ndio maana me husema heri uoe mlevi kuliko dame wa twitter
Utapepetwa ushangae
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Gadaffi foresaw his death, Arab league leaders were lauging at him including Assad as he was giving this speech.
Now look at Syria.
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Ndume amepitia forest kupigana na simba ndio apate kiti mdemu anaulizwa kama ako available.
Tears
Am a truthful men😅,
@Kotsocha_ke
Kesho tupatane Wilson airport. 9AM,
@_FliteStar
academy offices, I & M Building 1st floor.
Kuja kama umebeba ID.
Msichana mnataka tubebe nani KOT?
@njambifever
are you available?
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Daughters of Anake.
Nairobi girls with leather jackets, youd think they are in biker gangs son
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Kwa bar
Hii agenda unajaribu kupush juu huelewi sport haiwezi work.
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Hehe funny thing uyo anasema good guys are bad at sex and we can see the result of her having sex with a bad guy then.
Fatherless kid lol
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Nishawahi kula samosa za carrot Ruaka
Ive never been the same again
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Juu mlirukia Travis
Si sasa mblame uyo artist mbona hakustop concert vile mlianza kuibiwa simu?
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Your bio reads "west bloomfield" in Kenya we don't have that. Why are you lying? ;(
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When i was 8 months, My Late Mum passed. Reason being?
She was unwell and was given an injection (at a renowned hospital btw) which reacted soo instantly and passed on the spot.
That's why im very sceptic about something that isn't well explained.
I have to get proof alot of it.
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Huna talent huna kazi, shamjng someone whose talent has taken him to great places.
The only thing you know ni kutweet vitu za upuzi thinking thise engagements will somehow make you a better person than him.
Reconsider your choices.
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Captain is a good guy, lakini most likely wasee wanampasha ata hawajawahi mpea biz, so hawamjui ground.
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Ukiteka bird ataenda shower na Tshirt?
Smh
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We are glad to announce Vini as the Aluta Kibirit Patron, Sports department.
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Attention All Chuom Delegates, there is speculation that there is a new sheriff in town.
Codename: Pesheni
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Communicado Officiel
After Listening and also reading through the evidence, We as the prosecution has seen it best for the Reinstatement of
@mkenyanese
Cc:
@AndyMaina_
@gaddafi236
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Lakini who came up with the term "Ako mteja" when you find out someones phone is off😂😂
mteja si ni customer ama?😂😂
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