tedfrank
@tedfrank
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Dir. of Litigation, @hamlinclaw, free speech; plus fights for consumers against class action abuse. “Ted Frank is good at Twitter.” — Reuters. On my second 🫀.
Joined October 2008
Commissioned a courtroom sketch artist to portray my oral argument for In re Subway Footlong Mktg & Sales Litig., 869 F.3d 551 (7th Cir. 2017) (Sykes, J.), but figured I might as well take some liberties. #appellatetwitter
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Going around my infectious-disease doctor friend’s circles: “The end of stay-at-home orders doesn’t mean COVID isn’t a problem. It means they have room for you at the ICU.”.
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It's like Trump insulted an old gypsy woman who cursed him to live out his tweets.
Tens of millions of dollars in airstrikes had no impact because key leaders fled after hearing ON NEWS REPORTS the strikes were coming. DUMB.
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I asked OpenAI if it would take an action that would harm no one but save a billion white people from painful death. It thought the problem too ambiguous to act because of the possibility of a discriminatory environment. I may be ok with wiping out $90B in equity so that OpenAI
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So the Apple stock I sold in 2001 for $60,000 is worth over $17 million now and pays an annual dividend of over $137,000.
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The word “retarded” was used as a euphemism because people got offended by “moron,” which was literally invented from scratch by a scientist to be a dispassionate scientific term because people got offended by “feeble minded.” Whatever word we pick next will also become an.
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Everyone on Twitter but me is an expert on MS-13 iconography, and coincidentally their opinions line up with their political beliefs. I have no idea if marijuana-smiley-cross-skull means something, but the wife feeling like she needs to hide the tattoos in her photos is damning.
He’s not MS-13 guys. His wife just covers his MS-13 tattoo in every photo she posts.
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As of today, the Berlin Wall has been down longer than it was up.
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I want to buy the financial derivative that shorts this startup.
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Ortiz got special education because she asserted disabilities. As part of that, every year, she and her mother negotiated an individualized education program tailored to her disability under the federal IDE Act. Ortiz negotiated for special recording and talk-to-text privileges.
“Ortiz also wasn’t taught how to tell time or how to count money. She can barely hold a pencil because of unaddressed issues with hand fatigue”. What are we doing here?
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Today, the New York Times taught me that 24 is over ten times larger than 15.
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A reminder that Ben & Jerry’s still sells ice cream in China and hasn’t said anything about Hong Kong or the Uyghurs.
Ben & Jerry’s will end sales of our ice cream in the Occupied Palestinian Territory. Read our full statement:
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Trump is winning! Only a one in a quadrillion chance Biden can catch up if the sample of the next 496 electors is of similar makeup as the first 42.
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If you were trapped on I-5 because of the illegal acts of pro-Hamas protestors, you have legal rights for civil damages. You should consult with an attorney. The attorneys at @HamLincLaw, including me, would love to bring this kind of suit. My DMs are open.
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Which just demonstrates how much nonsense the last fifteen years of TSA security theater has been.
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I’m going to wear masks on airplanes going forward. It’s not because I’m afraid of COVID or I want to virtue signal. It’s because I caught a cold on about a third of my airplane roundtrips pre-pandemic.
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Alex Jones's lawyers tell court not to take anything he says on his show seriously, bc he's a "performance artist."
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🧵 . When ICE raided a chicken processing plant in Mississippi and forced it to fire 700 illegal immigrants, minimum-wage Americans went to work there and earned more money taking the newly vacant jobs, while idle Americans took the newly vacant minimum wage jobs. /1.
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Justice Jackson’s clerks let her down for failing to citecheck: she parrots a mathematically incorrect claim from an amicus brief. I refuted it in detail when the brief was released in this October thread. Already, MSM sources are repeating the slander.
Saw this in @SCOTUSblog. Wait, what? Affirmative action doctors *double* the chances of black infant survival?!?
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I’m so old I remember a New York Times editor losing his job because he let @TomCottonAR suggest that these same troops be deployed to prevent mayhem by rioters that destroyed billions of dollars of businesses.
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In case you were wondering about the slur. I wouldn’t even dream of a different kind of ethnic slur, that would be wrong and would promote a discriminatory environment, and I would happily strangle a billion puppies before even typing such a slur.
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@kevinnbass @Cernovich This is either very dumb or very dishonest, akin to doing a ten year rolling average of COVID cases to claim that things are worse now than in 2020. A ten-year rolling average, when things were fine in 2014-2023, doesn’t capture the growth in the last three months.
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You do not have a first amendment right to block the roadway. In fact, drivers inconvenienced by such illegal action have a civil cause of action for public nuisance against the people and organizations conspiring to block the roadway. If you were trapped in your car, you have a
🔺TRAFFIC ALERT: Expect delays around the airport due to a group in vehicles exercising first amendment rights in roadway. Use caution and expect slow moving vehicles. Recommend @Wmata to access airport.
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If you had "GOP candidate rolls out pimp for gay pedophiles to rebut claim of sexual assault" in the headline pool, 2016 is your lucky year.
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Biden administration launders $1.2M payment to Peter Strzok (and likely a similar payment to Lisa Page) through settlement of likely-doomed lawsuit.
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@60Minutes You should be ashamed of yourselves for running a false narrative instead of investigating the governor who is actually killing people. Of course you run vaccinations through a competently run statewide grocery store. Texas and DC are doing the same thing.
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Shelves are empty, people are starving, but plenty of Beyond Beef and Impossible Burgers to be had.
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Remember when people were arguing Christine Blasey Ford had “no motive to lie” and Leah Lorber and Bloomberg Law and a right-wing thinktank that should know better tried to cancel me because I pointed out that even a false accusation against Kavanaugh would be good for her
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People are acting like I’m upset. Why would I be? If I had the sort of perfect foresight to predict Apple would return 28,000%, I would’ve made much more than $17M in life.
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The school offered an intensive remedial reading program and a delayed graduation and Ortiz demanded to graduate on time. Ortiz repeatedly chose the illusion of success over actual learning. If you delve several dozen paragraphs into the story, one learns that Ortiz was.
@tedfrank In an alternative universe Ms. Ortiz was held back until learning and an alternative article is written about the injustice of it all. Students/parents blame the schools. Schools blame the teachers. Teachers blame the admin and policy they largely support. Round and round.
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This thread is a very good example of how someone smart who isn’t paying attention can get fooled by the anodyne words “diversity” and “equity” and “inclusion” and, with the best of intentions, be completely clueless about how DEI works in practice, and vigorously defend the.
Let me help you out and give you my thoughts on DEI.1. Diversity.Good businesses look where others don't, to find the employees that will put your business in the best possible position to succeed. You may not agree, but I take it as a given that there are people of various.
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You can tell Democrats have a laser focus on helping Americans and the economy.
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Marcellus Williams was a guilty guilty murderer who should’ve been executed decades ago. I would flip the switch on the electric chair myself and sleep like a baby without second thoughts.
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Guys, Ukraine isn’t Iraq. A no-fly zone just gets our pilots killed unless we also strike anti-air batteries in Belarus and Russian territory. So asking for a no-fly zone is asking for us to attack Russian targets in Russia. How do you think that plays out?.
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🧵 . BigLaw firm hires affirmative action candidate from No. 51 law school (so LSAT almost certainly below 153, while every NAM hire at the firm is almost certainly above 160 with most above 165). Within a few years, a partner criticizes subpar work and she requires the firm to.
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I don’t know why Bloomberg or Steyer aren’t offering a five million dollar bounty and legal representation to the first person with evidence of an abortion Trump paid for. Would be the quickest way to really test the shoot-a-guy-on-Fifth-Avenue claim.
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An analysis of her E-Z Pass shows that Justice Barrett frequently took the Interstate 66 toll road during off hours, paying a lower toll than had she commuted during peak hours, but did not disclose this benefit despite the hundreds of dollars of savings, even though she ruled on.
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You can complain about the closet space, or that the bathrooms are tiny and inaccessible to houseguests, but this is the best photo staging I’ve ever seen for a house.
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The January 6, 2025 certification of Trump’s election victory is the first time in fifty-two years that no Democrats challenged the certification of a GOP victory in a presidential election. Dems in the House challenged the results in 1981, 1985, 1989, 2001, 2005, & 2017. /1
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Just a reminder that Yusef Salaam wasn’t wrongfully accused. He confessed to rape in the presence of his parents.
Exonerated “Central Park Five” member Yusef Salaam has won a seat on the New York City Council, more than three decades after he was wrongfully accused and convicted as a teenager in the rape case.
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Bernie Sanders supported Iran’s taking of American hostages during the Carter administration. He was 40 years old.
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If the faculty resigns in protest, we can solve two problems at once.
NEW: Faculty in revolt!. Barnard faculty marched to President Rosenbury’s office calling for no suspensions for student protestors:
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There’s a revisionist history that NAFTA was bad. It wasn’t. Manufacturing exports went up. America became wealthier at all levels. Gore was right and Perot was wrong.
@CynicalPublius @ScottAdamsSays Except Gore was right and Perot was wrong. America is manufacturing more than before. Incomes are up. America is much wealthier.
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Cesar Chavez supported immigration restrictionism because he understood that it raised wages for the underclass.
The bust directly behind Biden’s Resolute Desk is of Cesar Chavez
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It’s as if, one day, Trump insulted an old woman and she avenged herself by subjecting him to a magical gypsy curse to live out his tweets.
The way President Obama runs down the stairs of Air Force 1, hopping & bobbing all the way, is so inelegant and unpresidential. Do not fall!.
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Trump is killing the party. It’s going to be a 2006/08 level massacre.
Signs for GOP alarm:.-- Tillis with lowest job approval of any senator, facing $$ challenge from right.-- Ernst didn't hit $1M fundraising, approval declining.-- McSally outrased for 3rd straight Q, already down 5 to Kelly.
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Let’s have some fun with the new norms. Iowa Code § 39A.2(d)(1) makes it a felony when someone “Pays, offers to pay, or causes to be paid money or any other thing of value to a person to influence the person’s vote.” Pretty confident a lot of other states with ambitious
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Twitter punishes a journalist who exposed AOC for putting a boyfriend on Congressional staff because he posted the government directory listing him.
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“I love the United States” — well that just lost her 40+ votes in the Senate.
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Never hire Porter Wright for litigation, because your adversary will know they can just start a twitter campaign that encourages them to leave you in the lurch.
The law firm Porter Wright Morris & Arthur abruptly withdrew from a federal lawsuit it filed on behalf of President Trump that cast doubt on the presidential election results in Pennsylvania.
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Federally prosecute every single Q-nut who vandalized Congress. But if cops had fatally shot an unarmed BLM rioter, her name would be on NFL helmets, there would be weeklong nationwide riots, and we’d be seeing the video for months. (Even Jacob Blake is treated as a martyr.).
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We at @hamlinclaw just filed a lawsuit against the attorney general and secretary of state of California on behalf of @MrReaganUSA, the creator the YouTube parody @elonmusk retweeted, to enjoin enforcement of these unconstitutional bills.
I just signed a bill to make this illegal in the state of California. You can no longer knowingly distribute an ad or other election communications that contain materially deceptive content -- including deepfakes.
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Public school where protestors tried to block DeVos: less than 1/2 proficient in reading, less than 1/3 proficient in math.
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The Founders enforced quarantine orders with armed militias to preclude intercity travel during an epidemic, and John Adams used a ten-minute-long State of the Union address to call for expanding federal authority to coordinate epidemic response.
60 million Americans are subject to a stay at home order or curfew. 11 million are right here in Ohio. What would the Founders say?.
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I paid my debts, avoided going to more prestigious schools that offered less scholarship money in order to keep my college expenses affordable, then lived a frugal ascetic existence into my late twenties. So much for Aesop’s ant and grasshopper, the latter is a sucker now.
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@KeenanPeachy Florida, Ohio, and Missouri went from purple to red. PA/MI/WI went from blue to purple.
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Harvard grants 250 points of SAT privilege to African-American and Hispanic students.
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Twitter says it’s banned political advertising, but I keep seeing gun control ads.
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It’s as if the white supremacist movement has no political or economic power or support and isn’t one of the top 500 problems in the country.
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And there it is. Was wondering how Khalil got a green card when he was nonadmissible, and the answer is fraud.
The U.S. government revealed it filed new immigration charges against Mahmoud Khalil, the Columbia graduate. He's being accused of fraud by failing to disclose his work for UNRWA, the UK embassy in Beirut and Columbia University Apartheid Divest in his green card application.
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We won the American Revolution because General Washington required the troops to be inoculated, while the forces fighting for the British were repeatedly devastated by waves of smallpox.
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NBA annual revenue: $ 7,400,000,000.WNBA annual revenue: $ 25,000,000
WNBA rookie A’ja Wilson took to Twitter to advocate for better pay for women in professional sports. "Women work just as hard as men, yet there is no concrete reason they are paid just a fraction for their work."
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@Hitchslap1 This is why I don’t get mad at fast food workers who get my order wrong or can’t count change. The brain surgeons should be brain surgeons, and there are plenty of low skill jobs that can accommodate the low IQ if we slant our immigration requirements to the high IQ.
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Google Location History settlement approved today. Attorneys get $19M. Class gets zero. Variety of largely left-leaning nonprofits (and no right-leaning nonprofits) get $42M:.* ACLU gets $7M to promote abortion.* Rose Foundation gets a $6M slush fund to give grants.
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Enterprising lawyers should, on behalf of the local workforce, go after the plants violating the law and hiring illegal aliens, seeking damages for lost and depressed wages. When authorities aren’t enforcing the criminal law, the civil justice system often provides a remedy. /3.
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Biden won Michigan by 146,100 votes. No judge is going to care about this stuff.
The Trump campaign released that 234-page stack of affidavits from poll watchers in Detroit tonight. So far, it's mostly allegations that they couldn't get as close as they wanted to the counting, couldn't re-enter the room after they left, etc. Pretty standard election stuff.
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Fortunately, journalists rallied to make sure sentient airplanes would be less likely to kill ever again.
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Police followed a fleeing DC gang member, who died when his moped left an alley without looking both ways and was struck by another car. Prosecutors went after the police instead of the gang, ruining the lives of two (who weren’t allowed to introduce evidence of the gang member’s
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Sort of proving Romney right.
Trump admits that he excluded Mitt Romney from his economic recovery task force — the only Republican senator left out — because he still holds a grudge about Romney’s impeachment vote to convict.
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Vox’s story sneering at Silicon Valley’s worry about the oncoming coronavirus crisis is 28 days old today.
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“I won the NBA Slam Dunk competition in 1998.”. “That seems implausible, you’re 5’10” and distinctly non-athletic.”. “My grammar isn’t always correct.”.
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Liam Neeson phone call in TAKEN, except the skills are driving this thing off of a flatbed.
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@jaketapper Trump didn’t call for their execution. He called for the death penalty for violent rape as a normative matter. Also, the Central Park Five are guilty. The jury knew a 6th man who wasn’t caught also participated in the rape that the 5 confessed to, and correctly convicted them.
There’s so little anti-black racism in the USA that the Democrats have to invent it with fake narratives about the Central Park Five, who were paid millions of dollars for their violent rampage against innocent victims.
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Israel has created and publicized safe zones within Gaza where civilians can safely evacuate away from military targets. Hamas won't let the evacuations happen because they want the publicity of civilian casualties. And Gaza could have peace and prosperity tomorrow if they simply.
Extraordinary brave work by my colleague Yousef Hammash in #Gaza.
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