Taylor Pate
@taylorlpate
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3,131
Following
743
Media
7,208
Statuses
53,691
I think I've got my messiah impression nailed down. I draw a lot. Sad songs. Husband. Father. Polyam/ENM. He/Him.
Houston, TX
Joined December 2013
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Send us removal request.
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Food on Ubereats $21.48
Delivery Fee $0.99
Tip $3
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Total $98.49
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OH COME ON
After almost two months of waiting, my Jae'Sean Tate jersey arrives today, just in time for
#RocketsWatchParty
.
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I'd write "Gimme $5k and we'll talk" and slide that paper right back in.
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If the Rockets trade for Russell Westbrook, I'll tattoo his MVP season averages on my face.
If the Rockets traded for Russ the speed of Twitter would increase exponentially after Rockets fans were forced to delete 45% of their tweets.
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Imagine being 62 year old Sandy Franklin, staring at a gas pump, and being like
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Y’all really let the Astros get back to the World Series, man. Talked all that shit, booed people who weren’t even on the team, made merchandise trashing the folks just to let them waltz back into the World Series unbothered.
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Bran when he’s getting eaten alive by zombies because they chose Theon to protect him.
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James Harden will play with Ryan Anderson and Kostas Papanikolau but he draws the line at John Wall and DeMarcus Cousins. Okay.
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Save some VC for the jumper 😭
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Hey, Austin Rivers took less money to stay with the Rockets. Remember that.
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Sacramento.
Name a city without an NBA team that you think deserves one. ⬇️
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I say unto thee: bare no witness to the false prophet from the Western Brook. He brings promises of triple doubles, but will lead you astray
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Good morning to everyone who said Houston drafted Josh Christopher because he’s Jalen Green’s friend.
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The $3 tip is random, just like the rest of these numbers. Yesterday I gave a DRIVE THRU worker $5 as a tip just for being awesome. Get off my ass cause you got the wrong one.
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Starting with this beauty
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Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of Kawhi, I will fear no Spur: for thou art with me; thy 3 and thy D, they comfort me.
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Christian Wood took 16 shots and had 24 points.
John Wall took 25 shots and had 14 points.
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This is RIDICULOUS 😂
I still have no clue how Tari Eason was able to get this steal.
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Good morning to everyone except those who didn't wanna be here.
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If the Astros win this game, I need the social media manager to tweet "Awww did that hurt?"
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This is awesome. John Wall gives Christian Wood the "we practiced this" look before this inbounds play:
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Knew that hair looked familiar.
8 hours ago, Joe Biden’s odds to win hit an all-time low of 25.8%.
Now? They’re back up to 61.5%
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Gerald Green been a Rocket for like 5 minutes and already throwing hands to defend the team. Most Houston Houston Rocket ever.
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MICHAEL BEASLEY IS HOPPING ON ONE FOOT AND STILL PUTS HIS HAND UP TO GET A SHOT. LEGEND.
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I know how the Rockets could add some center depth with shooting.
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Tyler Ivey Tyler Ivey’s dad
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Alright
#Rockets
fans, I have TWO sets of 2 lower bowl tickets to Friday night's home opener against OKC to give away. All you have to do is retweet this and be following me to enter! Winners will be picked tomorrow at 12pm!
#LightTheFuse
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We went from “Jalen is a bust” to “Jalen is gonna make me bust” reeeeeal quick.
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Alperen Sengun is shooting 41.7% from three.
We call that a stretch big.
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Sneak peek of Jalen Green in the 2022 NBA Slam Dunk Contest. 👀
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If the Rockets trade for Giannis Antetokounmpo, I'll tattoo his MVP season averages on my face.
If the Rockets trade for Russell Westbrook, I'll tattoo his MVP season averages on my face.
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I could not think of a better trophy to commemorate this season.
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GUESS WHO GOT THE JOB
Your boy has a second interview today for the Network System Administrator at.....THE HOUSTON ZOO. I've wanted to work at the zoo since I was 6 years old.
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Maybe I got this wrong and I should be petitioning for someone to pump my gas for me. I mean, shit...it is kinda annoying.
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This is actually a brilliant move for James Harden. Entice the NBA to set up a Rockets-Bucks finals. Create intrigue. Create rivalry.
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John Wall is probably sitting somewhere like "We had electricity that didn't wanna be here."
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If I were the Ringer CEO, I would be fucking outraged that I could have had all the top-tier NBA media talent, but I don't hire enough people of color and put my daughter on podcasts over rightfully deserving individuals.
“If I was a Houston fan, I would be fu*king outraged that I could have had Simmons, Maxey, and a couple of Firsts versus the sh*t sandwich that I got.”
- Bill Simmons on Houston’s return for James Harden
(via “The Bill Simmons Podcast”)
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Just so we’re all clear, I’d trade John Wall for Karl Anthony-Towns.
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I know I tweeted this, but I’m holding the people of Oregon responsible for my phone dying by 3pm.
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Also, don’t stop fighting for Net Neutrality. We can still win this shit.
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I've been missing my mom so much lately. One year, my alternator went out and I managed to get back to her house. She ripped it out and replaced it in under an hour.
2022 makes 10 years without her. My kids never got to meet her, but I'm trying to be half the person she was.
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If you’re laughing at Houston, I can’t hear you. I’m in my car shivering and crying cause my phone dead and my powers out.
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@TomiLahren
@SnowflakeAwards
Does complaining about Snowflakes not make you a snowflake yourself? It seems you whine more than they do.
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Alright seriously what did Evan Fournier do to deserve this kind of hunting lol
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I’m gonna need to see the front of that jersey.
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Good morning. The two legends finally met yesterday (and I was there too).
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YOU'RE WELCOME
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