Coolest thing to ever happen to me on Twitter 😱

A woman was reversing in Asda car park today and she almost bumped into my trolley so she said "sorry". I said "that's okay", but my American friends are saying the correct response would have been to shoot her in the head three times and claim I acted in self-defence 🤷‍♀️

#TheTraitors Rachel: *enjoying her dinner* Amanda:

what do you mean next week I have to go back to working 40+ hours instead of reading whole books and going to movies in the middle of the day and getting drunk on my couch. haha what do you mean

The numbers are out.. Girls sexually assaulted by transgender people in UK toilets: 0. Women and girls sexually assaulted by men in the UK every year: over 160,000. (Source: ONS, Crime Survey for England and Wales) So why are we still letting bigots spread fear about the wrong

I find it hard to believe we're debating whether ebooks count as real books at a moment when literacy has fallen off a cliff. I don’t care how you read, whether print books, ebooks or audiobooks. Read widely. Read daily. Read for any reason or none at all. Just read.

Been kicked out the house, the whole family crying and i’ve ruined christmas, apparently shouting “Cheating little slag” at your 12 year old cousin over a game of Monopoly is “out of order”

After seeing a tweet in October about a little girl who was mocked for supporting Charlton, we were moved to invite her to be our mascot for the day. She also had the chance to meet her idols, Sophie and Anna. We hope this experience will make for a memorable show & tell in the

"It was Christmas Eve, babe In the drunk tank An old man said to me "Won't see another one" And then he sang a song "The Rare Old Mountain Dew" I turned my face away And dreamed about you Got on a lucky one Came in eighteen-to-one I've got a feeling This year's for me and you..."

What the fuck is up with people in this country having absolutely NO spatial awareness in supermarkets? Why is your trolley sideways blocking the aisle? Why are you standing near the entrance looking around as if it’s your first time on earth? MOVEEEEEE

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DID HE JUST ANNOUNCE THE HUNGER GAMES

Fucking load of shite

If GCSE’s move online it will be a catastrophe. Citing “preparing for exams” schools will dump what little remains of books and pens and stuff our poor addicted children even further down the internet at great cost to their education, mental health and safety. @ofqual

Schools reward kids for: 🚩 Not being sick 🚩 Not being injured 🚩 Not being disabled 🚩 Not grieving a loved one 🚩 Not going through a crisis 🚩 Not being a child carer 🚩 Not coming from an abusive home 100% attendance awards - what a ridiculous and cruel concept.

Do not make fun of children for believing in Santa. There's actually grown adults who believe a 78 year old man sustained a 2 cm-wide gunshot wound to the ear that completely healed in 19 days without leaving a single mark.

Behold, a clip from one of the best examples of comedic misunderstanding ever committed to film, in my humble opinion. Good day.

The far right has officially decided the apocalypse is… • Disabled kids wearing ear defenders • Workers getting reasonable adjustments • People using Motability • ADHD, autism & mental illness being accurately diagnosed They’re saying the quiet part: They don’t want

no one prepared me for the fact that when you have a 9-5 you can't like. go to the dentist or the doctor or anything anymore. because you work. and when you don't work they're closed.

Good life with lesbians? I am so in