Irene McGee
@springfever
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Mom. Comedian. Storyteller. Curly Hair… Judge me on the day I joined twitter not my follower count.
New York, NY
Joined October 2007
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having a baby is a lot like stand up comedy. I love it more than anything and it’s destroying my life
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Her. “Mom, just one song before bed.” Me, “One song.” Her, “Alexa, play Shake Your Money Maker.”
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Thanks! I would have responded sooner but I am covered in beads. Just covered.
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This is love 💗! Me, “I need some things from The Container Store but it’s snowing. Him, “I’ll go.” SWOON
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So @seankeane just did the most hilarious tweet showing allllllll the snowman ⛄️ his mom has collected over the years - read the whole thread 🤣😂
And these snowmen are roasting marshmallows right next to Mr. Snowman Stay Puft. Clearly they’re willing to melt themselves just to intimidate this impostor.
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The snowman on the right is the only one who understands the danger of sunlight reflecting off snow. Certainly that happy-go-lucky jingle bell clown has no awareness of UV damage.
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I call this one “Snowmanspreading.” I’m uncomfortable with how proud his guy is of his balls.
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Wow! My immunodeficiency disease CVID (an unfortunate acronym in the time of COVID) is making front page news on @CNN. PS 💕Donate blood & plasma because people like me with CVID need regular🩸infusions! thanks @jaketapper cc @emilyvgordon
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Today I made a mac & cheese 🧇 WAFFLE Recipe: 1. Make a box of mac & cheese 2. Put in waffle maker (sprinkle a little bit of shredded cheese on top) To anyone who hasn’t tried this - you’re very very very welcome.
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“Santa must not have been wearing his glasses, because the picture I made him had TWO swings.” 😳
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Nothing is better than @ABCBeerCo and @zmack
Good morning to literally no one except the person who wrote this five-star review of my business that will fuel me through this entire month.
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Love this article about @GregtheGrouch If you don’t know his work check it out. He’s such a great human/artist/comedian and apparently he sews!
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💓
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Lifetime appointments should be reserved for one job only : parenting.
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Here’s one way to reduce plastic. Get rid of the rake! It’s the least used toy in toy history. #nomorerakes #plasticfree #stopmakingrakes
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Me “The shoe has hit the fan.” My friend, “No. That’s not a thing.” Filed under : expressions I’ve been saying wrong for years.
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