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sloane Profile
sloane

@skipper

Followers
25,457
Following
1,300
Media
11,532
Statuses
83,847

creators @xbox at assembly | pro sims 4 player | stay-at-home mom to 3 cats

she/her
Joined April 2013
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@skipper
sloane
7 months
i wanna house you and make you take my name, i’m gonna spouse you and make ya tat’ ya ring 💍
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
Darth Vader: Obi-Wan never told you what happened to your father. Luke: He told me enough! He told me you killed him! Darth Vader: Are you in the right headspace to receive information that could possibly hurt you?
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
“how’s your year going?” me:
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@skipper
sloane
3 years
this is actual pain
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@skipper
sloane
8 years
It's the most wonderful time of the year.
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
me @ all my friends playing KH3
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
I STARTED CRYING IN THE NAIL SALON BECAUSE I JUST FOUND OUT I GOT PARTNERED ON TWITCH and the lady who was doing my nails was so happy for me and knew about Twitch 😭
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
“friend-zone” or as i like to call it “i really enjoyed hanging out with you and have never flirted with you or lead you on, nor have i ever had the slightest bit of interest in dating you, but you fell for me and are mad that i won’t fulfill your fantasy of dating me-zone”
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
can someone check on the non-gamers during quarantine? like... what are they even doing, learning a new hobby?
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@skipper
sloane
2 years
Matt and I called an Uber and the guy vented to us for 10 minutes about how he’s missing his daughters birthday today and how it’s miserable to driver Uber because they pay so poorly. So we tipped him $10 since we felt awful and then we saw his reviews…
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
tweet things that will confuse the Zoomers
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@skipper
sloane
2 years
If your immediate gut reaction to Amouranth’s livestream is something defensive like “Why did she stream this?” or “What if she’s lying?” then, you’re a part of the problem.
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@skipper
sloane
3 years
normalize shouting “POGGERS” during sex
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@skipper
sloane
2 years
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@skipper
sloane
2 years
“Why didn’t she just leave her husband?” On average, victims will attempt to leave an abusive relationship SEVEN times before they can leave successfully. I’ve gone as far as thinking “If I died, it would be easier to leave this relationship.” That’s how the abuse cycle works.
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@skipper
sloane
1 year
When I was trying to break into the gaming industry at 18 years old, I asked someone in the industry for advice. He told me I have a pretty face and would be great as a receptionist. Anyway, I’m now the Director of Influencer Marketing at Xbox’s PR agency of record.
@unitygames
Unity for Games
1 year
Every game dev has an origin story, what's yours? 🦸
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
good luck to the men in my DMs
@Emojipedia
Emojipedia
5 years
✅ Approved in #emoji12 : Pinching Hand
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@skipper
sloane
3 years
microdosing death by working a 9-5 job every day
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@skipper
sloane
3 years
spread your ass cheeks, not the plague
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
The existence of Adam Driver implies the existence of Adam Passenger.
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@skipper
sloane
3 years
i introduced my boyfriend to sid meiers civilization and i haven’t seen him in 3 consecutive days
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
After her week and a half long battle with COVID-19 and pneumonia, my Grandma passed this morning. She was loved so much by her family, her friends, and was lucky to have two long time, loving partners in her life who cared for her so much.
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
@ESPN_Esports All the men in the comments need stop speaking for women. Maria is, was, and always will be a woman and the first woman to compete in LCS.
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
if you listen closely, you can hear the sound of thousands of girls changing their tinder bio to “you want a whore, buy one. you want a queen, earn her.”
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@skipper
sloane
1 year
how do i tell IT that i spilled tikka masala all over my work laptop
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
I flip my phone at restaurants ALL. THE. TIME. I have a ton of push notifications on my phone and it gets really distracting. I also want the other people I’m with to know they have my full undivided attention.
@Sylvelleprince
Prince PurpleRain
4 years
Let’s not go into 2020 being fools phone flipped over means either you hiding something or cheating 🤷🏾‍♂️💁🏾‍♂️
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
honestly, i’m a catch - i get along with parents - i will laugh at your jokes - i took spanish in 6th grade so i’m basically bilingual - i shower daily - i can’t cook - please date me, my mom won’t stop asking me if i’m seeing someone
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@skipper
sloane
3 years
@CrankGameplays and then you’ll be able to taste the deliciousness of door knobs again
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
Day 1 of Self-quarantine:
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
petition for guys to send pics of their dogs instead of their dicks
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@skipper
sloane
3 years
If you’re dating a man who’s favorite game is Call of Duty: congrats. They will never cheat on you. He’s been playing that franchise for years and will continue to play it even though he thinks the new games are trash. Their loyalty is immaculate.
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
do i like being choked or am i just horny to die?
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
Ninja and Shroud right now
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@skipper
sloane
1 year
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
let me be your goth gf
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
off to save the world
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
Due to restructuring, I was laid off from my job. I’m looking for something in: 👉🏻 Influencer Marketing Management 👉🏻 Talent Management 👉🏻 Social Media Management I’m currently in LA and not looking to relocate, but open to discuss. Please RT & DM me about any opportunities!
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
It’s honestly depressing how society pressures us into thinking that if we do not have a partner that we are not complete. I think relationships/dating are wonderful, but when you put yourself in that mindset, you end up forcing yourself to fall for someone who isn’t for you.
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@skipper
sloane
3 years
Orange was ejected.
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@skipper
sloane
2 years
The reason so many *men* are quick to denounce Amouranth is because they view don’t view women, especially sex workers, as a human being & rather an item, yet 95% of men consume porn that exists solely because of sex workers, but that’s a topic many of you aren’t ready to handle.
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
i guess i have a boyfriend now
@s8n
Satan
5 years
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@skipper
sloane
3 years
“There’s our little gamer! Glad to see you finally left your cave. Did you pause your game?”
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
🌺
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@skipper
sloane
6 years
was that really necessary? #PresidentialAlert
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@skipper
sloane
6 years
stanley is a closet weeb
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
anyone thirsty?
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
looking for my late ex husband
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
invite me to your pool parties
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
he is beauty, he is grace
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
can whoever broke my upstairs neighbor’s heart take him back?? he’s been playing sad 90s songs on repeat for the past 3 days
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
I am extremely excited to announce that I have accepted a job at @GOLINglobal , working on the Nintendo team. My focus will be working with Nintendo Influencers & Creators! I’ve been a massive Nintendo fan since I was 4 years old, so this is honestly a dream job!
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
my gym closed at 7 and no one told me to leave. it’s 715 and i can’t leave. the front door is locked.
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
Trump: COVID-19 is a hoax COVID-19:
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@skipper
sloane
2 years
I respect the hustle 😂
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
I’m living for the fact that i just made eye contact with my abusive ex and watched him scurry into a store to avoid me. That’s right, this is my turf you guilty piece of trash.
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
@FionnOnFire crazy! i don’t see any girls on this list. i thought boobie streamers are running twitch but it just looks like white young males are
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@skipper
sloane
3 years
this presidential election has felt like i've been watching uncut gems for 24 hours straight
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
if you’re reading this, you’re dumb
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
This morning I watched my Grandma’s funeral on livestream, while only 6 family members attended, wore face masks & stood 6+ feet apart. No one could hug or kiss after the ceremony was over. I watched from my room completely alone Its a devastating time to die or lose a loved one
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
they always say “ok boomer” but never ask “are you ok, boomer?” 😔
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
what are you doing tonight? 🤔
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
losing your virginity usb 🤝 not getting it in correctly on the first try
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
here are my favorite chokers 🥰
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@skipper
sloane
2 years
it’s my 30th birthday and i’m celebrating it by going to a museum and eating sushi !! 🍣
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
LOOK AT MY CAT
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
the amount of people who find me funny went up by 1 from 0
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
Ferris says “no feet pics”
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
my uber cancelled on me as i walked up to his car and he just stared at me and drove away. this hurts more than any other breakup i’ve ever had.
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
what you see when on a date with me
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
ok i’m buying a lottery ticket
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
tell your dad i’m single
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
me and a fan
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
Super excited to announce that as of today, I am officially a Partnerships Manager at @Streamlabs ! 🥳
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
i’ve killed a hell of a lot of people to get to this point
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
An hour ago I tweeted about #BlackLivesMatter and since then I’ve lost almost 50 followers. Spring cleaning has never felt so good.
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
no filters, no makeup
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
relatable content
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
happy new year ✨
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
After almost 2 years of working on OMEN by HP at Giant Spoon, I no longer work there and am currently looking. I have over 5 years of experience and expertise in: Influencer/Account Management Social Media Management Brand/Social Strategy and more! I also really like dogs. 🐶
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
vry happy
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
all white everything
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
“why are you single?”
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
we got dressed up in onesies and did escape rooms.... and escaped! ft @RIPmika & @CrankGameplays
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
stuntin’
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
i like my outfit
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
oh, you have sex? well, i just paid off my credit card bill and got it from $4200 to $0
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@skipper
sloane
3 years
@wodnevets @lilykonings That's great for you. However, $130k a year is life-changing money for many, especially for those who have several bills and debt to pay off. Or afford a 1 bedroom apartment in a major city. Or maybe would like to own a home one day.
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@skipper
sloane
3 years
how it started vs. how it’s going
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
just found out i have to go on dates to find a relationship... really not handling it well.
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@skipper
sloane
3 years
Dating shouldn’t have to be hard. If someone wants to be with you, they’ll show it by putting time and effort into being with you. If they don’t, then show yourself some respect and leave.
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@skipper
sloane
5 years
men out here telling women that we’re emotional but i’m pretty sure every woman has dated a guy who punched holes in their wall
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
i’m redownloading tinder. top liked comment by tomorrow will be my opening line when i match with someone: go.
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
the interview fit
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@skipper
sloane
4 years
because i cant tell if he’s trying to walk into my apartment he goes to the apartment next to mine, rings the doorbell at this point i’m standing there, staring at him to make sure he’s not lying, the door opens & he goes “THANK GOD I’M ACCIDENTALLY CREEPING YOUR NEIGHBOR OUT”
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