Rægenhere
@realRaegenhere
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>ubisoft
>finally making assassin's creed game set in feudal Japan
>protagonist is African refugee
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White man literally burns himself alive for Palestine and leftists still hate him for being white.
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4chan's pol board is less bloodthirsty than twitter leftists
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>isn't even the real Big Boss
>just some medic
>still easily saves the world
>while Big Boss hides and cowers
>the real goat protagonist
I kneel
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Assassin's creed, but the assassin can't blend into a crowd
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> Be BioWare
> Tasked with making a Star Wars game
> Decide to create a unique game 4000 years before episode 1 instead of an easy game based on episode 2
> Create the greatest Star Wars product ever
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> Be super intelligent
> Don't have common sense
Many such cases
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100 hours in a game is the male equivalent of 100 bodies
It's so over
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Ohh Husbant, you are not Ryan Gosring, you not man from drive or brade runner, nor are you Ken. You my Husbant.
And we are homeress.
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>make feminist Barbie movie
>messaging about le oppressive patriarchy
>patriarchy comes out looking based
>ken steals the show from Barbie
>feminist movie becomes about man's heroic struggle against the longhouse
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Console plebs will never know the simple joy of steam indy games
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You can tell she's genuinely hot because it's only ever women who hate on her
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> Check which new game is trending
> Cannibal incest game
> Boot up Skyrim
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While some dispute Hitler's painting skills, no one disputes his fashion skills
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Ohh Husbant, you become UPS driver! We no ronger homeress, We are mirrionaire now.
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>be Bethesda
>acquire Doom
>make best Doom game ever
>immediately follow it up with the worst Doom game ever
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"Ofc, Mr President. I'll stop Sam Hyde. I'm no cowardly, small-headed cockroach."
"Excellent, he can't keep getting away with it."
Resident Evil villain before and after injecting himself with a dangerous experimental virus
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> Boot up HOI4
> Germany 36
> Stick to the script
> Invade USSR
> Capitulate USSR
> Check map
> Need navy to invade Britain, USA
> Close game
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Ohh Husbant... You've been cancerred by Conservative inc. And we are homeress once again.
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> Be Bethesda
> Busy making Skyrim
> Decide to commission original Fallout Devs to make a new Fallout game - Fallout New Vegas
> Their game is also filled with glitches and bugs
> No one cares
> Their game is widely considered to be superior to your game
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"Men commit over 95% of all violent crimes. Applying a leftist perspective, this is the result of systemic discrimination against men. Logic dictates therefore, to end this discrepancy, women's rights must be curtailed"
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This woman was considered unattractive by ancient Roman standards.
It's so over.
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>journos already hating on it
>redditors already hating on it Masterpiece incoming
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> Run Skyrim
> Customise character
> Nord
> Male
> Longswordman
> Proceed to remove all magic practitioners from the game
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>use product
>it's bad
>rate product as being bad
Journos:
"Umm actually this shouldn't be allowed."
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This is the worst superhero outfit ever, it even has the zoomer hair
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>journos already hate it
>certified masterpiece incoming
Todd bros stay winning
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> Loser nobody
> Gains random superpowers
> Uses powers for good
> Basically unkillable
> Is called a superhero
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> Christian cult starts kidnapping and persecuting sinners
> Cult leader warns of imminent apocalypse
> Feds arrive
> Proceed to violently decimate cult
> Nuclear apocalypse happens
> Le Evil Christian cult leader was right all along
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"Dad, I'm scared."
"Now son, remember what your father is always telling you."
"Nothing ever happens."
"Exactly."
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> Be Valve
> Create the most popular multiplayer game on the planet
> Constant cash cow
> Huge and stable playerbase
> Update to a new engine
> Shut down csgo matchmaking
> Force players to play cs2
> Large part of playerbase can't even run it
> Great game ruined millions lost
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"Ohh Husbant, you maker money from twitter?
How much is it?
A few dorrar?
Ohh Husbant, we stirr homeress, but at reast you try. Hehe."
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Bro talking about pizza toppings while other guys top his wife
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Ohh Husbant... You take vaccine? Your heart exprode. Don't reave me, Husbant?! Why... Why you trus the srience?
BREAKING: The UK Government has published official figures on deaths following COVID vaccination revealing 1 in every 482 vaccinated people in England died within one month of vaccination, 1 in every 246 died within 60 days of vaccination, and 1 in every 73 were dead by May 2022.
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Ohh Husbant, you sold our house to buy twitter brue, to earn money. But your posts are terribre. And we are homeress.
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>be redditors
>see mods you don't like
>seethe
>get mods kicked off mod host sites
>celebrate
>modders create their own site
>seethe
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> Create beloved, culturally iconic franchise
> Become insanely rich by selling it
> Disney ruins it
> Drastically elevating the popularity of the original trilogy and the prequels
He won
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> Israel and the Palestinians at war
> Check twitter
> It's just Indians and Pakistanis arguing with eachother
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That's right, Greta Gerwig. Patriarchy is when men have fun without women being there to nag them.
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> Balgruuf the Great
> Jarl of Whiterun
> Nord hero
> Still secretly worshipping Talos
> Hates the Thalmor
> Sides with the Empire
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Ohh Husbant, you preorder new Starfierd game? Hehe. Ererytime you do this, they are terribre. Haha. I'm sowrry.
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>website that exists for nothing but hosting other people's mods
>doesn't allow mods
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