Phil Griffiths
@philgriffs
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A married father of two, and a comedian. This isn’t the funny part.
San Francisco / Bay Area
Joined December 2011
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You think the Nirvana album cover kid would have sued if it was huge in the photo? #nirvana #nirvanakid #nirvanababy
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Walmart greeter just cracked the top 5 for most dangerous jobs in America.
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If this was all just an elaborate way for white guys to stop looking like an idiot during handshakes, thank you.
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Does it surprise anyone that he doesn’t know what sarcasm is either?
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Just serenaded my dog with a rousing rendition of “Sweet Child O' Mine” by changing it to “Sweet Dog O' Mine”. So things may not being going as well as I thought.
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Performed on a Zoom show and two audience members were shirtless men laying on their bed So my nightmares are coming true now. #coronavirus #StayAtHome
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The clubs in the 2020’s are just gonna have a bunch of people line dancing to TikTok songs. #tiktok #tiktokdance
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Why doesn't the @NFL just do the draft online using a Yahoo Fantasy Football league draft? #football #fantasyfootball #NFLDraft2020 #NFLDraft
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I want a follow-up show about all those people who moved their family of 4 into a tiny home and are now realizing what a horrible idea that was during all this. #tinyhome #stayhome #coronavirus
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There are gonna be a lot of white girls having makeup birthday months once this is over. #ugh #CoronavirusLockdown #StayHome #COVID19
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Your portion of the stimulus package will be determined by your total number of puzzles pieces completed. #2TRILLION #2TStimulus #puzzle #puzzles #PuzzleForToday #stimulusbill #StayHome #CoronavirusLockdown
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Thanks @guybranum for a great show @RoosterTF. @philgriffs & @brookeheinichen also killed. Yeah, whatever, I wasn’t supposed to take photos.
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Hey, come check me out in @SFSketchfest this Friday night at @pianofight / 10pm for the Locals Only show. Get tickets at https://t.co/az1Kz3j2fr
#SFSketchfest2020 #sfsketchfest
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Laurie Kilmartin is flat out one of the best comics I’ve ever seen. She’s great to work with & just a pure joke writer. She’s recording her album this week (Wed-Sat) at the @punchlinesf so go buy your tickets and watch her. Don’t miss it, she’s great @anylaurie16 @JackieandLaurie
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